Did they send me daughters, when I asked for sons?

[SuperSweed]

While I sit waiting for lunch time I suppose starting my accountability thread would be in my best interest.

Currently I am just focusing on losing weight. Once upon a time I had these thoughts of being a strong man but at this point in the game it isn’t a realistic thought. Now for those of us who aren’t totally in the know on 12/08/14 I went a little crazy and joined a boxing gym. I always thought the idea of boxing was super cool and I may have watched one too many episodes of Hajime No Ippo. While I thought the sport was nifty keen, the idea of working out in a group has never really appealed to me.

I am no in the best shape of my life. I didn’t want people making fun of me for my flopping man titties bouncing all of the place while I jumped rope. Thankfully that thought has so far been proven wrong. I’ve only gone to class one day so far but everyone there was really cool and supportive. I was right in thinking that they are all in much better shape than me but I am already making friends which is nice.

Besides hitting the bag I still have my old membership from Anytime Fitness which will definitely come in handy for a little bit of weight lifting.

Well enough with my ramblings here are my current measurements. I’ll try to keep myself honest:

Height: 6’

                     Week one    Week two   Week Three

Weight: 292       286             280               278

Biceps:

Chest:

Waist:

Thigh:

Calf:

Here is my current regiment:

Monday

Boxing Class

Tuesday

10 minute stretch

20 Eliptical

Clean and Press    3x15

Bench Press         3x15

Front Squats        3x15

Deadlifts        3x15

Decline Sit ups    3x25

Decline Oblique    3x25

Wednesday

Boxing Class

Thursday

10 minute stretch

20 minute Cardio Row

Dumbell Bicep Curl    3x15

Dips            3x15

Pull ups        3x15

Tricep Pushdowns    3x15

Shoulder Shrugs    3x15

One Arm Rows    3x15

Friday

Boxing Class

Saturday

Light Cardio exercise of my choice for a half hour.

Sunday

Rest

[SuperSweed]

Boxing is definitely one of the hardest things I have ever done in my entire life. I walked in there feeling good about myself, the coach had been impressed with my punching power on the first day, and I left wanting to vomit. Nonstop cardio for nearly an hour and a half. I prayed to every god I could think of for something to happen to make the class stop for even a minute. Thankfully my delicious chicken lunch managed to keep its seat of power firmly in my stomach. Don't get me wrong it tasted excellent but nothing ever lives up to your memory the second time around. Besides the physical activities I managed to stay strong with my desire to eat healthier, even with my sister trying to shove a Look! bar down my throat every two minutes. Through countless failed attempts I have learned it is easier to stay on track by prepping a bunch of meals in the beginning of the week for lunches. For me it is mostly just chicken, I've become pretty good at rubs and some light marinades so I don't generally want to shoot myself by the end of the week.

[The Most Loathed]

As long as you're having fun boxing, that sounds like a great opportunity for you. 

[SuperSweed]

I am definitely enjoying it. The people there are very encouraging and understanding that I am not in the best shape of my life.

[SuperSweed]

Well yesterday was definitely an oddly frustrating day. During the days that I’m not boxing I workout at an Anytime Fitness. I’ve been a member there for awhile and it is normally a pretty chill place to work. However, the closer it gets to the first of January the less I want to be there. Not because of the new people, nah. It’s like all the old members decide they have to mark their territory and hoard everything. I had a hard time accomplishing anything without interrupting somebody’s circuit.

Sure, I get it. You’re really into the workout and the last thing you want is someone interrupting your focus. Normally the dude abides. Man, when the gym is this packed though it’s okay to mix up the circuit a little bit.

Besides the constant battle for equipment the workout felt easy and hard at the same time. The weights were light at the beginning of the set and by the time I was done my arms didn’t want to move. It’s fine, I know that means that my endurance needs some work but my poor machismo feels a little hurt whenever I have a hard time cleaning the little weights.

I am definitely looking forward to heading to the boxing gym tonight. I’ve spent half of my morning working on my footwork so hopefully I won’t look like a total newb again.

[The Most Loathed]

ah yes, I remember the days of the gym. There is alot of weird stress and emotion that people generate there, trying to protect their space and workout.

[SuperSweed]

I am falling more and more in love with this sport. Last night was a great workout! The coach gave us free reign over the bags to work on some basic combinations. I just love listening to the sound of my gloves making contact. A left hook followed by a big straight and the bag’s momma feels that. There is nothing quite like watching the heavy bag swing after each straight, especially when you really put that hip into it.

Besides the bag workout, one of the gym’s pro-fighters came in so I got to see how he trains. I’ve seen fights on tv, I’ve seen the promotional ‘training’ videos that are all over youtube, but man it’s not the same till you’re there in person. The whole place was electrified, giving everybody that extra somethin’ somethin’ they needed to get through the rest of their workout.

Enough gushing over that. My technique is still pretty sloppy, I keep over extending my straights which is just going to open me up to a whole world of hurt if I ever get talked into a ring. My footwork also needs some improvement. Now I don’t want to be that guy who blames faulty equipment but I honestly think a lot has to do with the shoes I’m wearing at the gym. Some really ratty old converses that I have had for a few years. Whenever I pivot my back foot wants to keep moving away from me. When I get some extra cash hopefully I’ll be able to get some better shoes.

Now as much as I enjoy my time with these guys I’m glad I get a two day break from them. My calves want to explode from all of the jump ropes,  my right arm wants to fall off, and my wraps are in a desperate need of a wash.

[The Most Loathed]

That's awesome that your having so much fun. Keep doing the work, the footwork and combos will come. You're still in the honeymoon stage so don't sweat any particular skill too much, just put in your time.

[SuperSweed]

Sorry for the three day absence here, I know you all were all clinging to the edges of your seat to see how well I’ve been doing. Saturday and Sunday are my two light/day off days, where I kinda help my wife workout at the gym and generally just try to recover. She’s pregnant with our first right now so I have to pay extra close attention to everything she does to make sure nobody gets hurt. Now don’t get me wrong, I love my wife to death but she has the worst form of anyone I’ve ever met. Helping her out is a workout on its own.

Monday was my cheat day for food which of course means I force fed myself some delicious pizza rolls. Delicious, delicious, pizza rolls… After eating those my stomach really hasn’t recovered at all. Other than that I had to mix it up a bit and lift weights instead of boxing. A busted water pipe kept everybody out of there while it was being repaired. I try to avoid working out at the boxing gym on Tuesdays and Thursdays mostly because one of my underlings at the store also happens to frequent that particular establishment. He’s ten years younger than me, been fighting longer, training harder, and I don’t want to lose what respect he has for me by letting him watch my flop around.

The weight lifting went alright, I managed to sneak in on that sweet spot in time where the guard is changing so there was next to nobody there but a couple people who I enjoy shooting the shit with. Did I mention how much I hate/love my normal tuesday workout? I hate/love it. I always have the worst time with front squats. Most of my excess love sits on my stomach so my front balance isn’t the best to begin with. Throwing that extra weight right there just makes it that much worse. I swear the only reason why I do it at all is because I love doing the regular version. This gives me a nice opportunity to deload and work on those stabilizing muscles to make my heavy workouts that much better. CP’s and I get along okay, I have a pretty decent snap so I can get the weight where I need too before my lack of balance really becomes an issue.

Tuesday’s boxing class was the best. We spent half of it working on footwork which I am surprisingly very good at. I used to do a lot of swing dancing back in highschool and a lot of the steps transfer really well into the ring apparently. The rest of the class had a pretty difficult time with it. While I definitely feel for their struggle it ended up working in my favor. The coach gave the class to his assistant and he had me work the mitts. Which apparently I am terrible at, so there’s that.

He does this weird thing where he compliments and insults you at the same time. Apparently I have one of the stronger punches in the gym, which meant he had to bust out the thicker mitts. That made me feel really good about myself. However the next ten minutes went south.

‘You’re strong but by the time your punch gets here I could have read a book!’ He ended up having me just work on pure speed. I came close to throwing up, man I could feel that stuff right in the back of my throat. It was a humbling experience for sure. The faster I went the lighter my punches got, the lighter my punches got, the longer I had to stay on the mitts. He finally let me go when my last one two made the noise he was looking for. Not only do I have to work on speed, but my combinations need a bit of work as well.

I am also proud to report that monday was my weigh in day and I am down six pounds for my first week. Go me!

[The Most Loathed]

Nice work. Keep at it.

[SuperSweed]

Well there’s definitely no point in lying yesterday was a real weak day for me. I used my lack of breakfast as a crutch to eat more than I usually do. Not only that but I skipped my class last night just because I wanted to go home and play some League of Legends. Sadly I’ve been battling with a real addiction problem when it comes to that game. The community has a tendency to be rather toxic at times which isn’t really good for anyone really but I generally just play with my own group of friends which definitely helps. Sometimes I wonder how I can call them friends. They’re not bad people just enablers to a lifestyle that isn’t healthy.

I’ll level with you folks I’m a huge stress eater and in my profession there are lots of things to stress eat. Last night it was almost a whole Domino’s pizza. One of my roommates works at Dominos and whenever there’s a crank call for delivery instead of just tossing it in the garbage they get to take a pizza home. Essentially I have pizza on hand every day of the week, the fact that I’m not four hundred pounds again is a real testament to how much I’ve grown.

I know this is a fitness site but I am just going to write the following down to help me get over some things.

---drama ahead--

The sad part of the story is that I didn’t even like this pizza but I needed something. My dogs freaked out on each other and I just couldn’t pry them apart. They’re both bully breeds and when they latch on to something it’s just what they are to never let go. It’s not that they lock jaws, that’s impossible. It’s just pure determination.

That fight probably should have happened awhile ago. I’ve grown up with dogs my whole life so I know how to spot a fight coming a mile away. They’ve wanted to duke it out for months but until yesterday I’ve always been able to stop it before it begins. We were just on borrowed time here. Caesar is my Olde English and he’s a pushover and usually just bellies up over any sign of aggression. He just follows me around everywhere being a derp.

My wife’s Pitbull, Brutus, is kind of a dick though.

We don’t know anything about the parents to Brutus. He was dropped off as a four week old puppy inside of my charcoal grill outside of the house. The dog never really liked other dogs but loves people. There are so many Pibbles out in the world that we neutered him immediately so that’s definitely not the problem. Caesar on the other is not neutered, but I know that doesn’t have anything to do with it. Brutus is just dog aggressive. He’s been kicked out of three doggy daycares and just straight up banned from two boarding kennels. All of those places have a requirement that all visiting dogs be neutered. He just hates other dogs, regardless.

The last couple months we’ve gone to a special dog training sessions to figure out if there was anything we could do. After three different specialists we heard the same things and to them it was an easy solution. Brutus should just be in a single pet home. His problems would be solved.

You can take him for hikes, let him lounge around the house, even go swimming with the guy. His aggression isn’t so bad that if he meets a random dog on the street he goes crazy. He plays it cool and just walks off. The problem really doesn’t even begin to surface until he’s become comfortable in an environment and the two dogs have known each other for longer than ten minutes.

I’m not a bad guy. Rehoming wasn’t even a thought until last night. I thought if I just worked extra hard with him that everything would be ok. Now I know better, It won’t be okay. Everytime this happens it gets worse. Next time one of them is going to die. My wife, she understands but doesn’t understand at the same time.

Here’s a little backstory, my wife was abandoned to die as a baby. Her birth parents left her in a tub and just left. It was a miracle that she was found alive. She was later adopted but this has left a fear of abandonment ingrained into her. She’s not just afraid of being abandoned but also afraid of abandoning anything.

When we found that dog I knew that I lost my wfe to it. She loves him more than me it’s easy to see. I know what will happen if I try to rehome Brutus, it won’t go well for me.

I understand this perfectly well. I know why she has the kinship with the dog that most people don’t ever get with one another human being. What she doesn’t understand is that if she truly loved him, she’d find him a home that could fit well into his needs.

So why don’t we get rid of Caesar? Problem solved with that guy out of the house right? Except my neighbor has a Jack Russel Terrier that finds any way possible to break into our fenced in yard. Needless to say Brutus hates this. I spend more time fillings in holes from that stupid dog than I do playing with mine. Our neighborhood allows bulldogs but there is a zero tolerance policy for reported Pitbull bites. I’ve complained to the police, her landlord, to her. It doesn’t matter. If anything happens according to the police it will be my fault for harboring an animal with known aggression issues.

All the blame will be on us. This isn’t a situation where I can just move, we own this house. We are here for life.

Now we can just pretend for a second that this stupid lady finally decides to move. Problem solved? Sure, except we have another puppy that was given to us from a divorced friend. That situation is a whole other fubar. Three dogs is too many dogs. What started off as just for a few days turned into months and now I know the dog is ours. I didn’t even know where that son of a bitch lives anymore. To all of his friends and family we’ve just pretend that we bought the dog from him. Despite some misgivings I owe him for other situations and letting him save a little face is the least I can do.

This isn’t even the first time a fight like this has happened. Awhile ago I had another dog. A dog I had before Brutus was even a twinkle in his father’s eye. She was a great border collie. She got along great with the eight week old Caesar. Yes that’s right Caesar and Brutus grew up with one another. Pretty much brothers. Also I really understand the irony of the whole name situation.

Brutus came along and I knew Squirt didn’t like him, she never tried to hurt him or anything. Generally she just didn’t want to be around the other dog. There wasn’t ever any snipping, biting, or growling. She would just go to her safe place whenever he was around. When he turned one he just went out of his way to attack her. My wife convinced me that it was Squirt who started everything. At this point in time I wasn’t home a lot. I worked three jobs to save up to start my business. I didn’t want Squirt to get hurt since she always seemed to lose these fights. Squirt was my best friend. I had her for almost six years but I did what I thought was best for her and found her a new home. I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. Believe me when I say the only time I’ve ever cried that hard was when my Grandmother passed away.

I knew three dogs was a lot. I hoped that culling the pack numbers would bring down the energy level for the rest to get along.

I never get to be right. I write this knowing what I have to do but also with the knowledge that I can’t do what really needs to be done. What will be done is just a bandaid. I am going to have to give up Caesar to save him from his own personal hell. In another year when Tootie is old enough for Brutus to decide he hates her as well  I’m going to give her up as well. My wife will take our unborn daughter and leave me if I try to get rid of this stupid dog. I know this because she’s told me through the numerous fights.

I feel like this was a long time coming. I feel like this happened only because I played hookie from the gym. If I had just gone I wouldn’t have been letting the dogs out. I could have kept lying to myself for awhile longer about making this bandaid situation work out.

On one hand I’m grateful that it happened to me and not my pregnant wife. On the other I am slowly starting to resent my wife for forcing me to give up on the things I love to cater to her mental crutches and I hate myself even more because of that.

tl;dr: Don’t skip the gym because bad things can happen to you.

[The Most Loathed]

ufdah. I know Joe Rogan loves pits but stopped raising them for exactly these types of issues. I have heard pits are great dogs but they do seem to be bipolar, they are the nicest, most loving dogs, except when their not, then it's own. In truth, I can appreciate that mentality, I have no experience with a situation like yours but I can appreciate the turmoil you are dealing with and I can appreciate how you are beating yourself up for being there when it happened. I'll tell you that if you hadn't been home and it had happened and it had gone on longer, you would have beat yourself up for that too. There's no way around it, when you feel responsible for some one or some thing that just happens. 

 

Do the best you can with regard to loving your dogs and wife and providing the best home(s) you can for all. Do not let fear or disappointment stop you from taking care of yourself. To provide the best home you can, you need to make the right choices to be health and mentally balanced. If that means time at the boxing club, find a way to prioritize it.

[SuperSweed]

Thanks man, I appreciate the words of wisdom. You are definitely not the most loathed in my book.

[SuperSweed]

This is just going to be a really short post since I haven’t actually accomplished anything today.

Well besides the above aforementioned terror that was my last week. This week has officially started off much better. Woke up stepped on the scale found out I lost six more pounds. A very nice surprise. Especially since my gym time last week was so spotty and my diet could have used some work. In reality this really helped me to realize how much shit I ended up cutting out of my diet. The difference from not eating everyday is astounding. Of course this means the next couple weeks are going to be really hard since this is more than likely nothing but the easy fluff.

[The Most Loathed]

keep after it.

[SuperSweed]

--Warning Lame Writing Ahead--

Svvede lazily stared into a mirror that he had liberated from a rather slovenly fellow so many years ago. The site before him left a man wanting. He was small for an orc. Large for a human. A being permanently stuck between two very different races. However what  he was, was a wide man in both girth and stature. A frame thick with the story of a rough life that had suddenly become too soft. A calloused finger prodded a thick roll. Soft… like a truffle. The mental picture brought a high pitched chuckle. Still he couldn’t help but flex slightly. There used to be so many muscles there. He didn’t dare to squeeze any harder, at least this way he could protect what little bit of self esteem he had left.

The Half Orc knew better than to rest on his laurels. His kind needed constant motivation to do anything that wasn’t destructive.These last six years… A sigh escaped the brute’s lips.  Life for the mutt had become complacent. After what seemed like such a short lifetime of adventuring, he found a certain sweet calling that kept him from any wanton fits of rage. It shocked many people to see a Half-orc so tame.

He couldn’t blame them. After all the there were more than a few members of his kind rampaging across the more… financially challenged areas of town. On the road the beast knew he enjoyed the sweet bitter taste of cacao. The very reason he ventured out at all was to procure enough gold to have as much of the sweet stuff as he could ever want.

At first the beginning had been rough. Sitting behind the counter of a sweet shop. With time he found that rough hands from sword work made him more than adept at strong arming thick rolls of caramels. Steely nerves allowed Svvede to place the most intricate of drizzles upon the finest chocolates. Yes, the man smiled, the life time spent as a butcher had indeed given him the skills required to make a fine chocolatier.  

One would be hard pressed to want anything more. He had a home, a wife, a business! Most mudbloods never amounted to anything. Svvede had definitely set the bar much higher for his clan. Not a hard act to accomplish honestly. The oldest of eight and the grandson of many, Svvede always felt the need to lead his family to better times. With this place the former butcher proved to the rest that there was hope for them all.

Despite his mild success he found himself pinning for the rougher portions of his life. He had never felt more alive than when the adrenaline of being so close to death coursed through his veins. That sweet smell of blood hanging through the air brought a fantastic tingling deep in his loins. Now every morning he woke to the a different type of sweet smell that brought a much louder rumbling else where.

Life would be much harder soon. Sour news circled through his small town like a plague. There would be a famine in the following month. Svvede turned from the mirror, gritting his teeth in frustration. Times would become tight for awhile. People were counting on his business to provide for them. Then there was a matter of his own soon to be offspring… Yes! The Half-orc gleefully clenched his fist. It was time to be serious once more. For the first time in forever the former adventurer slid his trusty pack across his broad shoulders.

Today it was time for an adventure.

--End of Lame Writing--

Well my diet has been great this week. There have been more than a few temptations but I managed to pretty much substitute for healthier alternatives. Lately I’ve been leaning on my calorie counter more and more. These things are great, especially when you’re trying to keep track of your macros. Although I can definitely see how people can drive themselves crazy over these things. Thankfully my sanity has been left relatively intact for once. I guess there is a first time for everything.

Finding time for the exercise portion of my new life has been a little more challenging than I would have liked. Not for the lack of trying mind you. This is the busiest season of the year for chocolates and yes that includes Valentines day. I wake up with good intentions but something always manages to wrong at work which ends up in many late nights trying to fix problems

Today will be different though. Not only is my store closed tomorrow so I won’t need to stay late fixing anything but  I’ve made plans with a buddy to go dick around a little bit at the gym. I am not the type of guy who bails out with commitments with other people.

I know it sounds weird from a business standpoint  but I’m almost looking forward to the off season just so I can relax a little bit. My Honeydoo list has been getting a little long in the tooth as of late, it’ll be nice to knock a couple things off of that list.