Challenge YOUR body image.

[Noname123]

And because I'm single, I have this horrible fear that I'm not good enough if I happen to meet a person who's good enough for me. That I need to have the perfect face, perfect hair, perfect body to be worthy of that amazing person. It doesn't help that I'm turning 26 and I'm terrified that one day I'll wake up with wrinkles, and there goes my chances.

 

That's rough but something I dealt (/deal) with for a bit too. Think about the people you're attracted to throughout the day when you're walking down the street. 

 

I betcha not a single one of them are perfect. The thought process swings the other way too. Don't be too hard on yourself when thinking about attraction, you're your own harshest critic, do what you can to be happy and confidence will do you a world of good both mentally and interaction wise. That's what I keep reminding myself when I find those evil little thoughts telling me I'm not good enough/pretty/strong/fast enough. 

[Bullroarer Took]

Also, "what an entire country finds attractive".  I'm just glad 350 million Americans reached a consensus so quickly!

 

Basically they found one magazine editor or someone who was allegedly in the know... and had them do it.  When I looked at the whole spread it seemed like most of them were not great with photo shop or were just phoning it in.  Most magazine images are photoshopped way better.

[Bullroarer Took]

Performance wise I am in the best shape of my life.  But I am at the point that I always have trouble breaking through.  I am for the second year in a row thinking do I want to cut all winter or try to bulk when I am still too high bodyfat to really benefit as much as I can... and know it's going to be another long dredge in the spring of losing fat.  If my upper body looked as good as my lower body I think I would be satisfied. Don't get me wrong, I'm happier with my body than I was when I was less muscle and still 2oish pounds heavier and 3-4 inches bigger at the waist.   If I could lost another 15# before the bulk would be great.  I just wish it was like when I first lost weight and it felt easy to drop 1-2#/week not 1# a month. 

 

I have pretty much always been skinny arms and legs with a belly.  at 35 I know that the window for being comfortable with my shirt of is probably closing.  Well, eventually I'm sure I won't give two f*cks even with max sagginess because there is an age to not care at all.

 

[Polaris]

That's rough but something I dealt (/deal) with for a bit too. Think about the people you're attracted to throughout the day when you're walking down the street.

Except that I'm not attracted to people throughout the day walking down the street, not even one. If I'm lucky, I may see one person in a month IRL that I find attractive. When I say I'm picky, I mean I'm picky. (And I'm not one of those people that only want to date supermodels, either. My taste is fairly eccentric, and I really have a very consistent and strong type I like [or actually two, and they're very different from each other]). 

 

Mostly I do think that I'm attractive to the people that I find attractive, but that demands that I'm at my best. I'm constantly worried I might meet my potential soulmate while I don't have my normal makeup on, or I have roots, or just the wrong kind of haircut. Like, at one point I was so worried my teeth weren't white enough to be attractive enough.

[Guzzi]

Ugh, body image. How do I even start...

 

I don't have pictures at hand to post, but I'm 5'4" and at most I've weighed 67 kg, so I've never been fat really. That hasn't stopped me from hating every part of my body more or less my whole life, and crying in fitting rooms because the clothes I thought would fit me didn't. I have weird body dysmorphia that goes both ways, I can see myself as either much bigger than I really am, or thinner, though the latter usually passes when I see a photo of myself, which has usually resulted in an unhealthy starvation diet. I've cut about 7 kilos in the past four months and I'm... more satisfied than I was before, but still not enough. Like, I can look at myself and think I look pretty smokin', but it's still not enough.

 

I know I'm insanely demanding of myself, but that doesn't stop me from being unsatisfied. I have this mental image of the perfect version of me that I try to achieve, even though some of those things have already become impossible... In my twisted logic, that's no reason to cut myself any slack. But even the possible things are virtually very hard - for example, I should have perfect skin. I even went off skin makeup for a month to see if my skin would magically improve (it didn't). And because I'm single, I have this horrible fear that I'm not good enough if I happen to meet a person who's good enough for me. That I need to have the perfect face, perfect hair, perfect body to be worthy of that amazing person. It doesn't help that I'm turning 26 and I'm terrified that one day I'll wake up with wrinkles, and there goes my chances.

I think I can relate, I've definitely been a bit like this in the past. I've felt really damn sexy one minute, then utterly inconsolable about how "ugly" I am a day later. Every single flaw and imperfection seemed magnified to the point where I dont think there was a single thing that I actually liked about myself, and not just physically either! I seriously wanted plastic surgery to "fix" my face, and cosmetic dentistry to sort out the bodge-job bridgework done by my dentist when I was 15, but you know what? My bf thinks I'm pretty, and I was told by someone at my work how "cute" my teeth were. (Takes all sorts if you ask me...)

I think that for me the way I felt about my physical appearance was a manifestation of my emotional state. I had HUGE emotional issues from my dysfunctional childhood, and since working through those I've started having confidence in myself. I finally built up the confidence to be myself and the courage to be completely goofy and ridiculous, and not care what other people think of me. Then, I started to "like" myself as a person, which led to me not caring about my "ugliness", which eventually became acceptance of my appearance. On good days I can even feel pretty, though I'm not sure if I'll ever be "confident" of my looks or comfortable looking at photos of myself.

I'm just wondering if you might be in the same situation? Maybe some counciling would help. It's incredibly liberating for me not to have all those negative thoughts bouncing around in my head. Just a thought... xx

[Thrillho]