Here I Go Again

[Fatty McButterpants]

Ugh. So I started my Brand Shiny New Life Plan with the goal of losing 70 lbs. By Christmas. On June 1. Yeah, I know. 

 

Anyway, since I've suffered eating disorders in the past, I decided it was best to keep the scale out of sight and weigh in once a week. Meanwhile, I was going to the gym every day, gradually working my way up from huffing and puffing through 45 minutes walking on the treadmill at 3 mph at 0% incline, to my current 45 minutes on the elliptical at Level 1 (it's Life Fitness equipment), 20 - 30 minutes on the treadmill at 4 mph at a 7% incline, and every other day weights, one day upper, one day lower with abs. 

 

I THOUGHT things were going great. I was fitting into stuff that I'd gotten ready to chuck into the Goodwill pile forever. But there were a few things I didn't change, and this week that caught up with me.

 

Like eating nothing all day except coffee and a couple protein bars or a yogurt, then making a mixing-bowl full of oil-popped popcorn with a stick of melted butter and eating it. In bed. Then going to sleep. Yeah, no, that doesn't work. So this morning I got on the scale, and I found out that not only HADN'T I lost anything since my last weigh-in two weeks ago (170, down from 194 on June 1), I'd actually put on 15 freaking pounds. And I'm 53 so I cannot blame my period.

 

I found this site, and I'm respawning. I'm going to go grocery shopping for the Paleo diet, get rid of ANYTHING refined or fatty in my pantry and fridge, stop with the diet soda, and moderate my workouts so that I don't exhaust myself and then wind up not being able to progress.

 

I'm here for support, because I feel like you're all My People, if you know what I mean. And now, I'm going to go hit the elliptical to get rid of that last ice cream cone. No more, though. I'm over it. If I'm still alive (and as you get to know me, you'll understand why I say "still") I want to LIVE, not just exist.

[Evicious]

LOL Wow, you really like to jump in with both feet! Welcome to the Rebellion: here, we hold sacred the most sacred of duties the world over - to be the become the best possible versions of ourselves (before we ultimately kick the bucket). It sounds like you're exactly our kind of rebel, too.

 

So right off the bat, I see that you're playing the health game on "Level: Hard". Eating disorders are no joke: they know no gender, no weight, and no age. And your mention of your recent diet struggles ("Like eating nothing all day except coffee and a couple protein bars or a yogurt, then making a mixing-bowl full of oil-popped popcorn with a stick of melted butter ..." seems to indicate that they're still a major factor for you. I'm happy to hear you've decided to clean up your diet and start eating real foods; the Paleo diet is a good place to start for that. If you need recipes, or have questions about how to tailor the Paleo principles to fit your lifestyle and preferences, we have a forum for that here (Paleo/Primal).

 

If I may offer some observations/advice...

 

It sounds like this was your situation:

Current science does support the bottom pyramid; I can attest that my own experiences seem indicate greater success is gained from eating better, rather than exercising more. So I'd encourage you to try to flip your thinking from, "I'm going to go hit the elliptical to get rid of that last ice cream cone," to "Boy, that ice cream cone was some high octane fuel for this elliptical session!" Or to be blunt, don't think of food in terms of "good" or "bad" - emotional connotations like that don't do anything except make you feel either guilty or justified ("I was bad and ate a cookie, now my punishment is 30 minutes on the treadmill," or "I was good and had a salad for lunch, I deserve to relax and not workout,"). Try instead to think of food as an enjoyable way of maintaining your energy levels. 

 

Speaking of energy levels, if you haven't already figured out your Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE), you may find that to be extremely helpful in how you balance your diet and exercise. Take a look at this TDEE Calculator: you can play with the numbers to see how many calories you need for varying levels of weight loss. I would absolutely NOT recommend you choose anything above "Aggressive". I know it looks tempting, but you've got a lost of risk factors involved in your version of the game. So while it isn't really PC for me to talk about it, I'm going to mention it anyway: you already know how easy it is to fall back into an eating disorder. If you really want to turn your life around and LIVE it, then your best bet is take the long way around to get to your destination; ie, train for the marathon, not the sprint. Don't try to lose 70Lbs by Christmas. Those pounds mean nothing: they're just a number that indicates the amount of force gravity has on your body. Instead, focus on the amount of force you can exert that breaks gravity's hold - your health; your strength. Don't worry about anything that doesn't indicate how much healthier you've become from one day to the next. Living isn't punishing your body for being unhealthy; it's rewarding your body by treating it better.

 

Oh, and in case you're wondering... there is such a thing as Paleo icecream.

[Fatty McButterpants]

Paleo Ice Cream? I think I may be in love with you.

 

I agree 100% with everything you said; the thing is, though, I actually don't use the cardio as punishment, and I really enjoy it. I just have that old school mindset of "move more, eat less, lose weight" that anyone who came of age in the 80's and 90's seems to have. I'm so very well aware of my risk factors (I'm also a recovering addict, so yeah, I'm a hot mess hahaha).

 

Thank you for all of the advice, and for the thoughtful post. I appreciate it very myuch.

[Fatty McButterpants]

1 hour ago, Fatty McButterpants said:

 

Thank you for all of the advice, and for the thoughtful post. I appreciate it very myuch.

I should also proof my posts very myuch. 

[Evicious]

1 hour ago, Fatty McButterpants said:

Paleo Ice Cream? I think I may be in love with you.

 

LOL I was so happy when I found out there was such a thing, too!  

 

I'm glad to hear that you truly enjoy cardio. And there is nothing wrong with an old school mindset - or any mindset, really - as long as it doesn't hinder your progress. That's the only time you should take a good, hard squint at what you're doing.  

 

I look forward to reading about your success here! You're going to do great. 

[Fatty McButterpants]

1 minute ago, Evicious said:

 

LOL I was so happy when I found out there was such a thing, too!  

 

I'm glad to hear that you truly enjoy cardio. And there is nothing wrong with an old school mindset - or any mindset, really - as long as it doesn't hinder your progress. That's the only time you should take a good, hard squint at what you're doing.  

 

I look forward to reading about your success here! You're going to do great. 

I think I am, too. Not to toot my own horn, but I'm totally open to suggestions, and I know that when something isn't working, it's time to ask people who are succeeding at what they're doing for some advice. I used to just keep running and running and starving and starving; I don't want to do that anymore. Yeah, I want to lose some weight (what woman doesn't want to change her body in some way), but my long-term objective is not to lose weight, it's to make myself more healthy. We're given one body to ride out this lifetime, and I believe that it's not spiritually fit of me to abuse that body.