Starting over, but for the last time! Also, hi!

[TalkDisneyToMe]

Hi all!

 

My name is Amy. My obsessions include everything Disney, Harry Potter, Overwatch, and my kitty cat Mordecai (shout out to Borderlands!). I can probably beat you in MarioKart, but don't get upset - you can probably beat me in just about anything else. I like cooking and hiking and long walks on the beach (just kidding, we don't have beaches where I live. We have snow). Game of Thrones, Stranger Things, Lost, My 600 lb Life, Hoarders, and sure, even My Little Pony. I am a nerd, and I'm happy to be here.

 

 I've been reading nerdfitness for years and putting Steve's advice to practice and good use for years. But I've also been on a rollercoaster ride. At my best, I was down 30 pounds from my heaviest of about 180. (For reference, I'm 5'2", so it's not a pretty sight), squatting my weight of 150, ran up the stairs to my 5th floor apartment without getting winded, and had no trouble saying no to junk food.

 

On an average month/year/amount of time, I yo-yoed from taking care of myself really well to knowing I was destroying myself and using it to fuel depression. What a dumb thing, depression. Not good for losing weight when chocolate seems like your only friend!

 

Ready for some background? Okay! (Feel free to skip ahead, it just felt so damn good to write this all out and it got really long...sorry!)

 

 I am 25, and have spent the past 7-8 years of my life shrugging my shoulders and comparing myself to others. I never knew what the heck I wanted "to do with my life". It was a big responsibility for a teenager to decide the rest of her life when she can't even decide if she has the strength to get out of bed that day. I watched as my peers went on to their paths at big colleges and lots of friends and had a second family that was their sports team or club. I envied anyone who was able to just strike up a conversation and make friends without getting weird looks. I was sad and lost and needed help that I didn't know how to get.

 

It stayed that way until about ten months ago. 

 

Having spent the time after high school going to college for General Studies because I thought it would inspire me, graduating and moving on to Accounting because "you like math! You can't not get a degree! You're going to school whether you like it or not, and I don't care what it's for!" (Thanks dad!)...I dropped out. Just stopped going. Lost a lot of money, stuck with a lot of loans. Gotta pay bills, so I get shitty retail jobs that barely make ends meet. Uninspiring day to day same old bullshit that lasted for about three more years, and I had nothing to show for "what I wanted to do with my life". 

 

By by the way, this whole past 7 years I have been with my amazing boyfriend who has done everything he could to inspire me, motivate me, guide me, etc. I have spent countless nights crying about what a waste of life I am and a burden to him and to my family, all because I'm lost and confused and fat to boot. 

 

So he decided it was time we stop waiting for things to get better and just start making things happen. He had extra money saved up for us for whatever, and he chose to use it on something I have always and will never stop longing for - Disney World. He took us to my most favorite and magical place for my birthday in January. And he proposed. "What are we waiting around for? To have $20,000 saved up for an extravagent wedding? I don't care what our wedding is like, I want to marry my best friend and I can't wait any longer" (or something like that, I was a sobbing mess)

 

After that, we both chose to make 2016 the year we made shit happen. We are planning a wedding, fixing things in our lives we aren't happy with, adding good things and purging bad things. 

 

But still, I could only take so many more retail jobs with no real career paths that interested me.

 

"What are you interested in? If you could learn anything in the world, job or no job, what would you want to learn?" He asked me.

 

"Nutrition," I replied without hesitation. "But I'm not good enough to go back to school. I have no money to pay for it and I'm already in debt, and no one wants to spend their time trying to teach a worthless person like me..."

 

I got got chewed out, to say the least. 

 

I'm in my first semester of an associates degree in dietetic technology. I got enough from PELL to afford school. I quit my shitty job to be here. I absolutely love it.

 

And I'm the fattest girl in the program.

 

****Skip to here for the end of a boring sob story!!****

 

Now, finally, at 25, 5'2", and 168 pounds, I am starting again. I've changed my diet to limit carbs (but not cut thhem

out completely, I have trained and it's not sustainable for me). I just went back to lifting weights a week ago (god I love that DOMS). I'm going to school for something I've been interested in for years and never realized you can just...go! You can literally be interested in something and go to school for it. School doesn't have to be what others demand you do, it can and should be something you want to do to better yourself. I had no idea what kinds of jobs were related to my field of interest, Nutrition, but now I'm learning about all the opportunities. It's amazing, and I've barely even started.

 

 

So here's the thing. My fiance is awesome and we keep each other in check, but we also enable each other. I don't know what it is, but if one person says "pizza," we both seem to be unable to get our minds off of it until we get some damn pizza. I need some buddies to help me out. I know surrounding yourself with the right kind of people helps a lot, so I'm working on figuring out how to make friends as an adult with my classmates. But you guys would really help me out too - you understand my nerdiness.

 

The other big thing: I have had my wedding dress for 7 months. I have spent 7 months being a shithead and not taking care of myself, and have actually gained weight since getting engaged. The dress I bought is three sizes too small, but it was my dream dress from eBay, so I got it for cheap. I don't fit into it, and my wedding is in April. I have six months to get into it and look and feel amazing for that one day. And I know a wedding is not the end of a weight loss journey, and of course I am gonna keep going forever to take care of my body...but damn it, I want to prove to myself that I can accomplish something awesome and make my family proud of me. Right now my main goal is to fit into that dress.

 

If you're reading this, you're either really bored or really kind. Either way, thanks for sticking through it with me, hello, and goodbye

[bker1370]

Welcome aboard Amy.  Glad to have you here.  How can we help you help yourself?

[Elastigirl]

How romantic, a proposal at Disney World. I love Disney. Welcome! That is awesome that you are training for a job you are looking forward to.

[AmyUncharted]

I read the whole thing and it's because you are a great writer. Well done on the introduction! I guess that's a weird thing to compliment someone on so..er...Welcome!!! I love your nerdiness! (game of thrones, stranger things, HARRY POTTER, cats...)

 

A job in nutrition sounds absolutely amazing. Seriously, if I could go back to school again (already been back to school once) I would choose that route. 

 

I hope you and your fiance finish out the year of "getting shit done" strong! I think you will find tons of motivation here and love it! Good luck with all your goals and epic quests! See you around  

[TalkDisneyToMe]

32 minutes ago, Rosie's Riveter said:

I read the whole thing and it's because you are a great writer. Well done on the introduction! I guess that's a weird thing to compliment someone on so..er...Welcome!!! I love your nerdiness! (game of thrones, stranger things, HARRY POTTER, cats...)

 

A job in nutrition sounds absolutely amazing. Seriously, if I could go back to school again (already been back to school once) I would choose that route. 

 

I hope you and your fiance finish out the year of "getting shit done" strong! I think you will find tons of motivation here and love it! Good luck with all your goals and epic quests! See you around  

 

Hey thanks for your response! And thanks for the writing compliment! That actually meant a lot to me because I write in my free time for a little extra cash. Validated, woohoo!!

 

I am really hoping my nutrition goals work out. I have all this info in my head and am trying to apply it to my own life, and would love to motivate others to apply it to theirs! Getting healthy shouldn't be about taking pills to cover up symptoms, it should be about treating and preventing problems with nourishment!!

 

Thanks again for the support, I'm sure I'll see you around the forums!

[TalkDisneyToMe]

On 10/12/2016 at 11:47 AM, bker1370 said:

Welcome aboard Amy.  Glad to have you here.  How can we help you help yourself?

 

Hiya, and thank you! Having a place to come and converse with others with similar goals and interests will be a great way to stay motivated and supported, so thanks just for being here

[TalkDisneyToMe]

On 10/12/2016 at 4:25 PM, Elastigirl said:

How romantic, a proposal at Disney World. I love Disney. Welcome! That is awesome that you are training for a job you are looking forward to.

 

His proposal was my favorite moment in my whole life. I have always wanted to be proposed to in front of the castle, and while we weren't right in front of it, we were off to the side (on the tomorrowland bridge) and the castle was lit in the background. We had a little crowd. It was awesome!! I love that he did it in a weird place because that spot is special to us but not special to a lot of other people!

[Akari]

On 12.10.2016 at 4:51 PM, TalkDisneyToMe said:

I have six months to get into it and look and feel amazing for that one day.

Your story reads like a love story. I love it

And I would love to help you to get the happy end and fit into that wedding dress.

[Scatterbunn]

Welcome and congratulations on all you have accomplished so far.