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Hi Friends!! If you have been with me for a while you know that I have a consistent Tarot practice. Lately it seems like I am *constantly* pulling the Chariot card, or in my Herbcrafter deck, Cedar, which is that deck’s “Chariot” card. It’s been a whole thing, believe me. So it seems super appropriate to dedicate this challenge to them and see where it takes me. The cards in question: From the D&D deck: The Chariot is concerned with following through on your intentions and manifesting your desires. Themes of journeying, navigation, success, willpower, action, control, and determination. The D&D card has both a Gynosphinx and an Androsphinx on the card, pulling the chariot. I read that as the necessity to balance gender, and on a personal note, my place journeying in that liminal space between manhood and womanhood as I try to consciously shape my body to fit my gender neutral self-conception. It might be more simply read as having control over unruly, unpredictable, wild, or difficult things. From the Herbcrafter’s Tarot: Cedar is a sacred ingredient, especially when used for the creation of vessels and canoes. Cedar calls us to move forward with confidence in a disciplined yet flexible way, embodying the journey. Cedar teaches that the deep journey is what results in the mastery, not the arrival. It encourages us to have faith in our experience and to trust the process, to lean on deep wisdom to forge a new path. Chariot is a warrior card traditionally: the charioteer is wearing armor in most card art and is usually decorated with squares representing the strength of will and alchemical symbols for spiritual transformation. I will be finding ways to channel the determination and resolve of the Chariot balanced by the gentle, rooted steadfastness of Cedar. I am particularly interested in the idea of a body as a sacred vessel. I haven’t come around to that thought in a long, long time, and certainly never from a place where I thought I was a worthy vessel of anything. I think this could be very productive for me. Intentions for this challenge: 1) Eat more plants. Low bar: one per day. 2) Lift every day, small or large. I was enjoying this last challenge as long as I wasn’t in pain, so I’d like to keep it going. 3) Make wise decisions about food - “Food that loves you back” as Harriet said. 4) Cook 2-4 times a week. 5) Focus on getting my three cups of water a day. Desires for this challenge: 1) Continued fat loss. 2) Increased strength and physical literacy. 3) Deeper, mindful relationship with food. Possibly offering thanks before eating? 4) Renewed relationship with heavy lifting and spending time in a gym setting. Bujo chart at the start of things: I hope that if you are resting in Zero Week it is high quality recuperation and gentleness. If you are ready to challenge right away, may your verve and enthusiasm last the entirety of what lays ahead! Thank you so much for being here. ❤️

Hi Friends, Thank you so much for all of your support. I don’t really have the energy to go through and reply to comments individually right now, but I have read them all and feel profoundly seen and loved. I ended up having a short, private conversation with Dave today to let him know that I wasn’t feeling supported by him and he acknowledged how I’ve been feeling and the exhaustion I am dealing with. He’s going to sleep on the couch tonight so I can get a good sleep in our bed and hopefully some more solid sleep will help me not feel so frayed. I told him that I was in particular struggling with the way he’s listening to me and then not saying anything (this is an Army thing that he is particularly bad for; I have to remind him I am a civilian and not a subordinate sometimes 😅) and he said he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say because I am right and he’s hearing me. I told him that telling me I am right would go a long way toward making me feel acknowledged and respected right now which seemed to surprise him. I am kind of agog that he is surprised, but it is a good reminder that we think completely differently. Whooo boy. Apparently he had a conversation with Houseguest about grocery money after I said something about it and some of that has been handed over. I didn’t ask how much, but at least the conversation was had and efforts have been made? I will take it. Dave also got paid today so a lot of pressure is off in that regard. We weren’t quite in the overdraft yet, but we were within $20 of it and that is far too close for me to be comfortable with. I also asked if they could go out somewhere today and leave me alone in the house for a while. They went out to Dave’s shop and worked on the mitre saw station for a few hours. I slept through some of it (napped in our bed, it was so nice) and then took myself to the basement to listen to music and play with my dice. I systematically took all of my sets out of their boxes and made a rainbow-ish mosaic from them. It was almost meditative. Then I picked out my most neon sets for an 80’s palette for tomorrow’s game. Some pics: It is pretty much bedtime here and I am ready to put this weird day behind me. I hope that you are all snug and safe and aware of your awesomeness. Thanks again for everything. ❤️

I feel that. I am so glad! Thank you, Sepherina! Thanks, Maerad. So good to see you! ❤️ I was surprised too. I hope it becomes a habit. I don’t know that it is necessarily making things more pleasant, but at least I am not having to stress about the dishes for three people in addition to work, dealing with pot smell, etc. Hi Friends! Happy post-Eclipse! Today is the 100th day of the year. I am doing better with my goals than I thought I might be 100 days in to 2024, even with this unexpected houseguest cramping my style. Still no lifting and really irregular meals and veggies so far this challenge, but I am trying to give myself grace for that. I am making sure I get all my water though and keep up on my Bujos so that is something at least. Also doing well with the no-wheat situation which is good news. I am very tired of sleeping on the couch when Dave is snoring and I think that the second hand smoke from the pot smoking is affecting my anxiety. I was a bit of a mess yesterday and it was probably the combination of eclipse, couch sleep, and second hand smoke (I don’t react well to marijuana if I smoke it so I assume second hand is likely also not good). But maybe I am just looking to attribute problems out of my irritation, too. I just realized that if Houseguest stays until the 20th, Dave leaves on the 21st for two weeks, leaving me with no alone time with him to decompress after the extended visit. Argh. Anyway, I am going to try to keep looking on the bright side of things to keep my morale up. It’s the best of the limited options. I hope that the birds are being raucous jesters where you are and offer a moment of amusement if you stop to watch them. Thank you for being here. ❤️

I appreciate that no one was attacking or vilifying him. He does mean well, he just functions totally differently than I do and that makes things tough sometimes. Good sleep does make everything better. I think the ones you mean are from the Norse line at Lindorm Dice. They are very pretty in person. Thank you. I am relived to hear that I am not the only one asking guests to contribute. All of my old hosting instincts from my first marriage say “pay for everything” but that is just not possible right now. I feel the same about the free room=contribute in other ways, so thanks for affirming that, too. Thank you! I am pretty proud of it! You absolutely may. Thank you, AP. ❤️ Thanks, Snarky. ❤️ Houseguest is from three provinces over, literally half a country away (and Canada is a big country, lol) and they don’t have return plane tickets until the 20th. Plus Dave sees no reason to ask them to leave, so that would be on me to make an issue of it, which I am not willing to do for a variety of reasons. ❤️ There are so many other sets that I want. 😬 Right? Lol Thanks, Maerad. ❤️ Hi Friends! I managed to find some earplugs for last night and was able to spend the night in my own bed. I still woke up a few times when they weren’t quite enough to seal out the noise, but on the whole it was an okay sleep. Better than the couch. I ate so much wheat yesterday, so no points for that. I am feeling pretty okay in the joints today, but I don’t want to get on the scale and see the water weight. Lol Dave may have to go into the city on Thursday to get his civilian passport reissued on the 24-hour program because the Army has messed something up that I don’t completely understand the details of. The side effect of this for me is that Houseguest would leave with him and go to stay with friends in the city, a few days earlier than we were anticipating. This is good news for me and I hope it works out in this way. It does mean having to walk to work and possibly home again on Thursday (not sure how that will go in the black boots but if it is dry out I might be able to wear my red ones which would probably be fine) but that feels like a small price to pay for having my house back. Cross your fingers for me! I started making hedgerow terrain for a hedge maze yesterday and it was nice to put my phone down and dig into something crafty. And then D&D went pretty well (we almost died trying to escape a goblin ambush) and we ended up having a good conversation on the group chat about what we wanted out of the game: Did we want to double down on this new keep we laid claim to and run an administrative game of local lordship? Or did we want to keep moving around the map adventuring? The consensus was adventuring, so we are going to try to hire people to watch the keep for us while we lope around. Hopefully we can come up with the money! Spent the evening watching the end of Campaign 3 episode 63 of Critical Role which I have been stuck on for a while. I saw a pretty significant spoiler for last Thursday’s episode and it has piqued my interest again. I am having a hard time engaging with C3 lately and I am not as motivated to get caught up, which is interesting because C2 got me through Dave’s deployments. Different characters, different story. It makes sense. But I am interested to see what comes out of last week’s episode, so I should probably get back on track with it. I hope that your pen writes perfectly today. Thanks for being here. ❤️

I am here for bean recipes, please! No fucks given commencing! This is not malicious at all, but very prudent. Thanks, Hal. ❤️ These are gorgeous, Laghail. Thank you for sharing. Right?? ❤️ You have such a turn of phrase, Harriet. I love it. You’re super welcome! Kerning fails are hilarious and everyone should enjoy them. Hi Friends, I did my InBody scan with my coworker yesterday and although it has only been about a week from my last one, there is still evidence of further reduction in inflammation and more modest weight loss that I’m happy about. Inflammation is now tied with the lowest it has ever been since I started recording and firmly in the “normal” spectrum now according to their metrics, which is great. My joints are feeling pretty good and my wedding ring is fitting nicely when I put it on (I don’t wear it when I am working because I have my hands in the sink for ~40% of the day). I need to work on my bulk wheat replacements though, because not having it in certain meals means my calorie intake is lower than it would be. And my fibre. Last night Dave surprised me by making chicken salad for sandwiches for supper (a recipe he has never attempted before; I was proud of him for taking the initiative and trying something new *and* using up leftovers in the fridge). I had mine as lettuce wraps, but was still a little want-y after because the bulk just wasn’t there without the buns. I had more salad and a few tablespoons of peanut butter and that seemed to do it. I am eating more peanut butter again which is absolutely a stress pacification strategy. I was doing really well with not stealing spoonfuls while Dave was gone and my stress was low but that isn’t holding now. I am giving myself grace about this but it’s worth keeping an eye on. My weight was 262.8 with my clothes on for the InBody and I am super stoked to see that number. Maybe the 250’s aren’t so far off! Work is a little stressful right now, not because the job is difficult but more balancing personalities. This is something I didn’t miss while I was working alone at the game shop and I knew I’d run into it as soon as I started working anywhere with people. I still think I am better off than I was while I was dealing with Ken, but the past week or so (two of my most competent coworkers have been off) has really shown that we are better when we are all together and no one personality has a chance to get too dominant. I think one of my coworkers who is in the kitchen may move on to another job soon which is a shame for me but makes a lot of good sense for them. I am really looking forward to my day off tomorrow. Houseguest did some dishes yesterday unasked and this morning made us eggs. This was nice. Bryon is getting a tattoo of his wizard Bogdan and I am so thrilled that he cares enough about this character he is playing in a game that I am running that he is going to put him on his body in permanent ink. It’s a strange borrowed pride, but how cool right?? It will be a forearm sleeve and it sounds epic. I hope it turns out exactly as amazing as he wants it to if it’s such a prominent placement. Alright. I think I am going to go have a bath before work at noon. I hope that you are all having stunning Saturdays. May your first sips of your hot beverages be the perfect temperature and there be no grit that requires sweeping under your feet if you are walking barefoot. Thanks for being here. ❤️

Technically.... no, you are not. You didn't invite this guest, nor did you force them to carelessly over-spend for a visit that you were told about too late to be able to stop it. So no, you're not on the hook for anything this so-called guest brought on themselves by making bad decisions and forcing you to bail them out. Hospitality goes both ways, and guests who don't have the grace and courtesy to treat their hosts, and the home of their host, with respect and consideration, are assholes who don't need to remain guests. Definitely an asshole of the highest order. You wouldn't happen to have an over-enthusiastic pet that by sheer coincidence just happened to play very energetically in the kitchen and accidentally crash hard into a kitchen table leg while the bong was on the table and you were in another room by chance...? 😇

I know! This deck is stunning. What a passion project. Can do! The gf regime took at hit yesterday at Easter Brunch (there were waffles which I rarely get to have and I love them), but I am feeling decent this morning and my weight is “only” up a pound or so, so hopefully dialling things back again helps things. I hope this “special occasion only” method isn’t terrible for me in the long term… Yeah, that sounds less than ideal in a combat situation. Yikes. Cool. I will definitely guard this treasure and keep her in coffee. Lol Thank you! It really is. I am so relieved. Absolutely! I am feeling so fortunate. I am all about body modification for life improvement. Most of my adjustments are pharmaceutical but I am definitely in the “make it better” camp. I wish I had a girlfriend sandwich! That sounds really fun. Thank you! Awesome. Thank you! Thanks, Silmarilliane! Hi Friends! I had such a great Easter weekend. Dave and I played a LOT of D&D and did a lot of prep (map making, painting minis, etc.) and it was so fun and rewarding. I am very glad we didn’t just default into spending the weekend in front of the TV as often happens. It was the first time I have painted in a few months and I was reminded how much I enjoy doing it. I definitely want to get back to it on a more regular basis. Our Wednesday nights are supposed to be paint nights but I got away from that while Dave was away. Often Martin would still come over but we would visit instead of painting. Nothing wrong with that, but I certainly got farther away from painting than I’d intended to. Plus it made me feel good to be using the painting supplies that I’ve been accruing as part of my “do things rather than spend money” goals. Did well with the no wheat until yesterday when Nicole and Bryon had us over for the day and served waffles for breakfast. I cannot resist waffles and don’t get them often because Dave doesn’t like them so we don’t make them at home. So I had a feast and it was fantastic. My hands are feeling okay so far today so hopefully I didn’t overdo it. I did not do any significant exercise or lifting all weekend and that was okay with me. I am back to work and such now (Dave is off this week for Spring Break) so I’ll be getting my NEAT movement in. We found out last night that a friend of Dave’s bought plane tickets to surprise him for his upcoming birthday and will be showing up on Wednesday. I admit, I wasn’t happy to be told that they were coming rather than being asked if they *could* come. My nose is pretty out of joint, but I am working on getting over it. My card for today was about playful joy and I think it was telling me I need to get over it and just adapt. Said friend could be staying as late as the 20th, but Dave doesn’t think they will be only here for the entire trip. I am bracing myself for them to not leave, but I hope they aren’t here for more than a week or so. That is a long time to have an unexpected houseguest. We weren’t banking on the added cost of another person’s food or gas for pick-up/return trips to the city (gas just went up here and the city is a 400 km round trip) and things are a little tight right now. Argh. Anyway, enough complaining. I am off to get ready for work. Need to stop at the pharmacy to get my meds before work this morning, too, so that will be my “adulting” task for the day out of the way. I hope that you get to ease into the week and still check off a needful task today. Thanks for being here. ❤️

Yes, my understanding is that it is best as a heist situation set in their particular world. That intimidates me a bit; I run home brew because learning other people’s worlds is challenging for me. I was thinking of doing that with the MCDM play test stuff later on in the year myself. I will watch for the bleed mechanic. Sounds nasty. I was going to post one for you, but then others beat me to it. Such a supportive community. ❤️ The Tower in a traditional deck is very intimidating, but Mushroom makes it much more accessible in my opinion, although maybe a little closer to the Death card? I would have to look up Death in this deck and see how they differ. It’s no fun. So glad to have you, Snarky! Thanks! Hopefully I can get a rein on things! Definitely. I have been dreaming a lot more since Dave got home, probably because I am not sleeping as deeply as I get used to him being back in the bed. I hope they have the rice bowls where you are, I was happy with mine! I love that Garlic is Strength, too. Thanks for posting this. I had intended to, but just hadn’t had the time yet. ❤️ I really love this deck art. It’s amazing. Hi Friends! I had my first appointment with my new family doctor today and it went so amazingly well. I am beyond satisfied and very excited. Spoiler for brief very general reproductive conversation in case anyone wants to opt of out that: So yes, much rejoicing. I will have to wait a bit to get the referral all sorted out, but I have been waiting 24 years at this point, a few more months won’t hurt. *finger pointy dance* We went out for wings last night and I ordered a gluten free meal and it was excellent. I have been disappointed the last few times I have gone to that particular restaurant but last night was good and that was a nice change. Then I got to go home and sit on the new couch and it was so very nice to not be falling into a chesterfield sinkhole! Dave even surprised me with a copy of Super Mario Wonder so I will have some fun playing that this long weekend. This morning was a little different in routine to accommodate my appointment, plus Dave took Saxon to work today for a “Bring your dog to work” thing. I am hella nervous about Sax being there surrounded by a bunch of unfamiliar dogs, but Dave figures as long as I am not around Sax will be fine. Dave might even be right, Sax’s behaviour is often weirder when he needs to protect me. He doesn’t do the same things when he is alone with Dave. So hopefully that goes well. Had a protein bar for breakfast and will probably order a gf sandwich for lunch. We have a leftover meal kit for supper if we want to cook, but today is also payday, so Dave might want pizza. I will have to remember that I can get gluten free crust if that is what we do. I think I’d prefer to cook if my feet are feeling up to it. No lifting this morning. I might try to get a little bit in tonight so I can check it off in my Bujo. I hope that you get some good news today and that no tags on your clothes irritate you as the day goes on. Thanks for being here. ❤️

Yeah, I am emotionally not quite ready to admit that it might be in the never category, but intellectually I know this is the better option. *sigh* I am also grateful that I know what causes it. You’re absolutely right about not wanting to be in the mystery symptom situation. That is the worst. I haven’t specifically gone out of my way for the ancient grains lately, but I think I will start researching them. That is a valuable perspective. Now to just get to the point where I have a year of avoiding the foods that don’t love me back under my belt… My card today was Apathy reversed from the Oracle of Oddities deck, maybe this is part of the message… I feel like the Cedar Chariot cards make a lot of sense right now, yes. And the InBody is doing its own heavy lifting. I am glad for it, too. Sending love back! ❤️ I will need to get caught up on the Reading Thread! I might do a cheese themed challenge next time, just for kicks… They are in a location that is the confluence of many ley lines and the raw magic in the area is off the charts. They are only level 10, but the area makes the high level casting possible, although there are some rolls to see whether or not handling the raw ley line magic goes terribly wrong or not. The party is currently trying to talk Bogdan out of it. We will see how that goes. Hi Friends! Yesterday was such a great day. Got up, had coffee, tidied the game space in the basement a bit more, rolled up a rogue assassin for a solo game that Dave offered to run for me (He’s converting the 2e “Thief’s Challenge” module to 5e for me on the fly), played that game for a while, talked to a friend, then the regular Sunday game started. We got to bust out the new Deck of Many Things that I bought recently (it’s so beautiful!) and I even had a vintage blue glass box to store it in, so it looks extra fancy (in the lore it is stored in a crystal box, I think, so this seemed really appropriate). Cutter, our Kenku Rogue, was the one who drew the cards. He drew four and got Staff, Maze, Ooze, and Giant, all new cards to the deck which made things really fresh and fun to explore. Staff gave him a magical staff that appeared out of thin air, Maze had him take three levels of exhaustion instantly, Ooze made a Gelatinous Cube show up and land on him (and our cart) so we had an impromptu combat, and Giant made him grow 7” and add 20 hp to his hp max and current hp. So that was interesting. I was very afraid we were going to have to face a giant after the Ooze card but thankfully that didn’t happen. Then everyone went home, Dave and I had chili from the freezer for supper, and spent the evening just hanging out. Early to bed. It was very nice. The Deck in the glass box: I did not do Bujos or Tarot yesterday. I think that might be the second or third day I haven’t written in the past eight months which I am okay with. The habit is very strong, especially on weekdays. Weekends might be a little more flexible now that Dave is home, we will see. I am back to writing at the kitchen table in the mornings because the broken loveseat is hard on my back. I really want to take that apart and get it fixed. Hopefully sometime this summer. Sonjia has an upholstery shop space at the cafe (it’s a weird arrangement, but I am not surprised by it at all somehow. Such a small town thing.) and has said that I can use her gear to take it apart and put it back together again. So that will be good if a little annoying to organize moving the loveseat there, etc. Nothing unmanageable though. I also did not eat my plant yesterday, unless you count the abundance of tomatoes in the chili last night, which I guess I could but isn’t really the spirit in which I intended the goal. I will probably eat my plant with breakfast today just to be sure it gets done. I bought myself some baby cucumbers which I really enjoy. I hope that you are coming into the week after a weekend full of self care and recovery and that you have what you need to get through the day comfortably. Thanks for being here. ❤️

AMAZING, Dear gods I love you. Harriet. ❤️ No, there are definitely not too many hobbies where those phrases go together. Lol Four years is a long time, but I promise the MN is worth it. I really loved that campaign. Thanks, Shello. Thanks, Sea-to-sky. I appreciate it, Snarky! Thanks, Kishi! Thanks, Hal! Thanks, Ever! I appreciate the support. You should get the dice. We should be able to pay the stewards et al., with loot, if we can find a secure way to get the loot to them (we are in unclaimed frontier land, no really established courier system). But that is the plan currently! Thank you, Scaly! Yeah, we need a rule of thumb for here, because this is more stress than I need. Hi Sal!! I am having a lovely, relaxed morning this morning! It’s been so refreshing! Sending love back! ❤️ Thank you, Sepherina! Hi Friends! Dave and Houseguest left at 5:30 this morning to go to the city to deal with passport shenanigans. Apparently the government can’t do the 24 hour passport thing anymore, the minimum is three days or something like that? So Dave had to go in today and will go back to pick it up on Thursday, administrative gods willing. This means that I have had the house to myself this morning and it has been so peaceful and quiet. I made my favourite coffee because I am the only one drinking it, did Bujos and Tarot, and now I am here and caught up on the forums. Houseguest will be returning this evening, but should be dropped off for keeps on Thursday’s return trip. This is fine by me. Today is Dave’s birthday and I feel bad that he is having to run around and deal with this on his day. We have had a terrible track record of things going wrong on his birthday the last few years and I was hoping this wasn’t going to be the case this year. This isn’t as bad as it could be though, so I’ll take it. Depending on what time they get back today we may still play the 2e game tonight. That would be nice. I succeeded in keeping the earplugs in all night again last night and was able to sleep in my bed. It was very good. My weighted blanket felt wildly heavy this morning for some reason so that was a bit weird. We got some interesting news about Dave’s job yesterday. Nothing related to Latvia and very much another “wait and see” kind of thing, but interesting. If it happens it will be a really good thing I think. Challenging, but good. As per usual no idea how long we will need to wait to know what is going on. This is the Army way. *lol* Twelve days left in this challenge including today and I am feeling completely derailed. I had such high hopes for momentum on this challenge and it has not played out that way. I am trying to be okay with it. This is a long haul project, it can’t speed along all the time. Today’s card was the Ace of Fire and said “you already possess the power you need but may not recognize it in yourself” and I feel called out. One thing this challenge has made very clear is that I “only” seem to make progress when my world is predictable - there is not a lot of plasticity or robustness built in for variation. I think I need to figure out how to bomb-proof some of these habits and routines so I don’t get so derailed when things aren’t going to plan. Long-term horizon, there are some potential big shifts that might be coming (Latvia, I am looking at you) and I don’t want to lose the thread if they come to pass. I am not sure how to go about bomb-proofing, because I think it largely comes down to executive function and will power, two things I am not the best with. Food for thought, anyway. Alright, I need to go deal with the dishes. I hope that you are feeling rock solid in your routines and inspired to something creative today. Thanks for being here. ❤️

Yeah, it came out recently. I was really on the fence about it, but succumbed once I saw it in person. It is stunning. Good call switching to Pathfinder. My Friday and Sunday games are 5e (Tuesday is 2e) but I am really interested in Critical Role’s Daggerheart system or MCDM’s forthcoming as-yet-unnamed RPG system. This is true. Thank you, Harriet. ❤️ I only count beans if they are fresh garden beans, not canned. Same with tomatoes, generally. I am hoping the lower frequency/amount will be enough that I can enjoy a little bit without too much trouble. But as someone said earlier, sometimes a little is a hassle and it’s easier to just not have any. That is a good system. Thank, Shello. Glad to have you! Hi Silmarilliane! Great to have you! True. Thank goodness for cheese. ❤️ Thanks, AP. I wasn’t aware of the desiccant issue, I will have to read more about that. Thank you! *nod* Worms. Not my ideal food source. *lol* Hi Friends! I woke up at 5:45 this morning which is wildly early for me. I was out of bed by six which is even more unusual. Dave was surprised. So was I, to be honest. I have completed my morning routine plus rolled my tip coin and taken the laundry upstairs and it is only 9 am. 😳I don’t work until noon so I have two and a half hours more time to fill. I am boggled. I think I might try working on some fiction writing, I’ve been wanting to do that lately. But I will finish my update here first. Work went pretty well yesterday and then I came home and cooked supper. I had forgotten to ask for a gluten free sandwich to be made for me while the kitchen was open and then my break kept getting delayed for various reasons so I didn’t want to delay it further so I just didn’t eat. That meant that when I got home I was very ready for food. Not hungry per se, but aware I probably should eat. There are some gluten free treats at work (a brownie and a confetti square) that are grab and go, but I didn’t want the sugar bomb so I did without. I have some protein bars that I can put in my bag to ward off this kind of thing in the future. After supper Dave and I just hung out which was really nice. Bryon came over briefly to pick up his birthday dice that I ordered from Black Oak Workshop. It was my first time ordering from them and I was impressed. I might get one of their advent calendars this year to see how it is. In bed early which probably accounts for my early morning. I sure love getting to go to bed early if I want to. No Revenge Bedtime Procrastination here. Dave texted this morning after he left for work that the couch and loveseat we had checked out at the Canex have been marked down to clearance, meaning that both pieces are available for $1600. He also checked our Canex credit and we have enough open that we can do it if we want to. I am very tempted. The Army’s Canex credit is a zero interest system that direct debits off Dave’s pay and we can spread it out over three years so it’s really doable for that amount. That information isn’t making resisting the urge any easier. 😅 Our current loveseat is slowly getting on my nerves more and more lately and here is a solution literally falling in my lap. We are going to go look at it again after work and see if we like it enough to do it. My only real concern is that the new couch is higher than our current couch which may make it harder for Sax to get up on. But we could make him a stool or something if necessary. The current loveseat is ~20 years old and has seen far better days, so even though we could save it with repairs, I am not devoted to it. We inherited it from someone else when they were done with it and it broke shortly after we got it. Look at me, talking myself into the new, shiny thing. Argh. I hope that you have an excellent day today. May the birds surprise you with a serenade! Thanks for being here. ❤️

Always wise to not assume. Lol Right? I am pleased it’s so responsive, but also yeesh, that means the inflammation must stack up super fast from exposure too, right? So there probably isn’t a “minimum non=problematic” dose which concerns me. It really does. I can mostly tell when my wedding ring doesn’t fit, but the scanner makes it even more obvious and less wish-y washy. I love these decks for you. I hope that you are able to get one that speaks to you soon. ❤️ It’s nice to know I have other options. Hi Friends! Today is a very chill (and chilly! 🥶) day! Woke up on time, had coffee and read the forums, went and straightened the basement game room a tiny bit then played with making a dice palette for my dragon bowl before running some 2e D&D for Dave. We played for a few hours and then took a break to run some errands. When we got home he put on a movie and I fooled around watching YouTube on my phone rather than watching Tom Cruise die over and over again fighting mecha aliens of some kind. Not my ideal film situation. Once my YouTube video was done I did my Bujo and Tarot for the day. Now I am here. It is good. Game last night went well and I enjoyed it. The parts I prepped for went okay; all the stuff I improvised that had nothing to do with the Baby being born stole the show. So it will be really interesting to see what happens next week. I think Bogdan might try to clone himself… For those of you who have watched Critical Role’s Mighty Nein, Bryon (Bogdan’s player) is thinking of a situation similar to Pumat Sol. We will see where it goes! We were down our Druid last night, but hopefully the whole group is back together next week. Don’t have much else to say so I’ll sign off. I hope the day is cozy and you spend it in good company, even if it is your own good company. Thanks for being here. ❤️

If our vegetarians and carnivore dieters can be supportive of each other's journeys and live in harmony, then it's a cinch for our Christians, pagans, atheists and others to do the same.

I walked to work today for the first time since I started in September! It went well and took 18 minutes. I wasn't particularly hustling, but had a good pace. I wore my Soucany sneakers with my orthotics and my feet feel pretty reasonable. Hopefully I get through my shift with no issues. Would be nice to make this a regular thing in good weather!

It is, and yes. This morning is particularly rough. Sure does. Thanks, Kishi. I think I am leaning pretty heavily on y’all lately, but oh my goodness, I don’t know what else to do. I am just so frustrated. Thanks, AP. Everything you have said really resonates. Dave not being bothered is pretty standard for us and while he is slowly improving on working on things if I am bothered by them, it is still definitely imperfect. I have mentioned to him that I am not happy about Houseguest not helping to pay for groceries while spending their money on a new bong. I have said that I am unhappy sleeping on the couch. I have brought up my dissatisfaction with not knowing when Houseguest is leaving. But Dave is just letting me speak and not really responding to anything, so I am getting fairly frustrated with him at this point as well. I appreciate that he is letting me air my grievances (this is a relatively new thing) but I wish he were doing more to meet me where I am with this. I really appreciate your tangent about your brother, makes me feel less alone. Thanks, Mistr. I don’t know that we are going to manage any alone time, but more because I am feeling aggrieved and resentful and don’t really want to spend time right now if it isn’t solving my issues. Which really sucks and I know it’s not the best mindset. It is a very good idea though, if I can get my heart into it instead of being resentful. Thanks, Scaly. I don’t feel graceful or positive this morning. Thank you, Heidi! That’s delicious!! Thank you, Friend. I love your face. ❤️ Thanks for the recipe, Bouncer! Will be checking out the library. I don’t prefer earplugs because they feel smothering for me, but I can do them in a pinch. I am getting quite close to “a pinch”. Whooooo boy. Thanks, Dearheart. I am not feeling relentlessly positive today. I will try to get to the pharmacy today and see what they have for options for earplugs. Thanks, Timo. I am pretty frustrated this morning, with Houseguest and with Dave. Feels like there is no win here right now. That might be because I was on the couch again last night and I am uncomfortable in my body today as a result. I keep telling myself that it is going to be fine. That feels like the only option. *sigh* Hi Friends, I am having a really tough go this morning. I am tired and sore and grumpy and oh my… Just feeling really, really done with this whole situation. I went to work three hours early yesterday just to get out of the house. I worked on my game prep and that was good although I wasn’t really sure what I needed to be focused on for the prep. But sitting at a sunny table and drinking lattes (one was decaf) while I prepped was a lovely change of pace. Shift went well and then Dave made supper when I got home. We ended up playing Heroes of Might and Magic for the evening, which was fine. Then I went to bed and moved to the couch just after 3 am. I am stress eating a bit and I don’t like it. Nothing really catastrophic, but definitely the random spoonfuls of peanut butter, some cheese, etc. I bought some berries and figs yesterday in an effort to get a bit more fibre in because my digestion is not what it should be and I think the lack of plants is the culprit. I am doing pretty well with the no wheat, although I absolutely had some cinnamon raisin bread the other night because I was feeling sorry for myself about all of this. I am trying hard to stay the course with the no-wheat and I am 95% successful. I’ll take that even if it could be better. Today’s card is the Ten of Air - Alfalfa, from the Herbcrafter’s Tarot. Key message is that you may have reached your limit and you need to regroup and compost your experience to set yourself up for future success and contentment. No kidding, deck. 😅 I hope that you are having a better start to your day than I am. I am so grateful for you and your support here. ❤️

Thank you. This person is incredibly important to Dave so I (honestly, we, he wasn’t told they were coming either and is similarly flat footed about it, but not emotionally inconvenienced the way I am) are feeling some kind of way about -not- being good hosts. I feel very torn about all of this, as I think I have established. He is much more go-with-the-flow about it, as he is about everything in life. Where I feel guilt about not being a good host (baggage from the high expectations of my first marriage), Dave just doesn’t care and isn’t inconvenienced by anything *because* he doesn’t care. I am not in a position to ask HouseGuest to leave without starting some shit with Dave though, and I don’t want to do that while we are still working on the reintegration. The further difficulty is that Sax LOVES them. They give him a lot of time and attention and honestly, very good care, so Sax thinks they hung the moon. He may get over exuberant sometimes, but the bong is not at risk, sadly. I am honestly a little jealous about the way my dog interacts with them. The cousin situation sounds rough! I am sorry you had to deal with that. I think I would have made the noise about paining the spare room if I’d had any notice that this was coming. I do need to get it done. *lol* Lol!!! Great gif! Thanks, Sal! The external offering of rage just isn’t an option right now without causing a lot of problems that I don’t want to deal with. There is a small library, I can check that out. I don’t remember workspaces from my last visit, but that was pre-Covid so things might be different now. I might also be able to go to the gym. Normally I would take Dave with me if I were doing weights, but there is enough I can do alone that I don’t need him there. It will remain to be seen how I manage that after a work session, but I have been wanting to find out so I guess soon is as good a time as any. The hot bath I can handle at least; my ensuite bathroom has the epic tub and that is off limits to everyone except me. Even Dave doesn’t go in there. So that is a good retreat. We don’t have the money for a hotel room right now - honestly, I am not even sure we have enough for groceries for the next ten days feeding three people without having to resort to credit which I don’t want to do if we can avoid it - but I wish we did. It’s going to be fine, but I am vexed. The couch was better to sleep on last night and I moved downstairs earlier in the night so got more uninterrupted sleep. I think things will continue to improve with the couch texture the more I use it. It is brand new and very stiff. ❤️ I love this for you. And I am glad that Nic is holding ground with the Heidisms. If he can’t keep up with you, he doesn’t deserve you. Thank you so much. ❤️ Mmm, solid insight. That makes a lot of sense. Thank you. ❤️ Morning, Friends! Yesterday I ate a smoothie for breakfast and had a lettuce wrapped burger for dinner with some baby cucumbers. I didn’t manage lunch. But I could hear Harriet in my head all day giving me good food advice, so thanks for that, Friend. ❤️ I moved to the couch at 12:45 this morning and had a better sleep than I did the night before. I am feeling more prepared for my day and that is good. I am taking a coworker to do the InBody scan this morning and then we are going out for breakfast before I work at 11. I might check back here if there is time between breakfast concluding and getting ready for work. I thank you deeply for the support and care you are offering. I am leaning heavily on it right now. I hope that you see some kerning on a sign that makes you do a double take today. That’s always fun. Thanks for being here. ❤️

Hi Everyone, I'm not going to reply to individual comments because I'm on my phone instead of my keyboard and it's a bit trickier this way, but thank you so much for validating my feelings about all of this. I know all I can do is accomodate because this is happening whether I want it to or not, but I'm still out of sorts about it. Dave is on his way to the city to pick up said friend, so I'm at work early killing time until I start at 11. My lifting goal hasn't gotten off the ground so far this challenge and I'm concerned it's not going to at this rate. I've been a bit unfocused since Dave got home which is pretty normal for reintegration, but I'm low key frustrated by my lack of consistency. I'm happy I'm doing other things, like painting and some cooking. But I'd like to be doing *all* the things. As would we all, I assume. Oof, not in the best mood today. I'm going to sign off so I don't contaminate all of your days. 😉 I hope that you find something fun to tuck in your pocket today. Thanks for being here. 💜

I am really excited for you to be into a new book so you have more room to experiment with different things. I know you will take the time it takes to make a natural transition, but I just wanted to share my enthusiasm for your pages and progress. ❤️ Harriet saying that was really profound for me. Work has a lot of baking and other gluten options that are easy grabs and the self-restraint to turn them down is definitely something I am developing but it’s slow going. It would be easier if I got a sick stomach or something otherwise immediate, but the joint pain just builds up over a couple of days, so slowly that I usually just acclimate until it gets to be too much to ignore. Not ideal for deterrent. I am glad you like the Tarot theming. I am a little self conscious about it because there are a lot of people with Christian Bible verses in their signature lines and I don’t want to offend anyone, but I think I am bringing it forward in a respectful way? I may be over thinking that. I am prone to overthinking. The Herbcrafter deck is stunning. One of my favourite decks for sure, and it was a total impulse buy. I didn’t even see the inside of the box before I picked it up. Absolutely the Universe calling. That hasn’t happened too often for me. Hi Ever! Good to have you! Hi Braveheart! Thank you for coming! ❤️ Hi athousandwords! Thank you! And thanks for joining us here! Good Morning, Friends! Had a bit of a weird night last night, was up from 2:20-3:30 for no discernible reason. But Dave got up then too, so we played video games together for a while before I went back to bed. I slept well after that (he didn’t come back to bed) and slept in until 8 to make up the lost time. That has compressed my morning somewhat, but it was worth it to not feel off kilter. This morning I pulled Eight of Earth, Turmeric, yet *again* and I am thinking I need to add that card to the challenge. Its dominant theme is letting what you are doing become embodied prayer and that feel so appropriate for these ideas of body as a sacred vessel, ritual/spiritual/thoughtful lifting, etc. Definitely something to keep in mind. I find I am a little shy to do my lifts in the morning now that Dave is in his chair. This seems so silly because we lift together when we go to the gym, so it’s nothing he hasn’t already been exposed to. I hope that you have a moment of embodied prayer today. Isn’t that such an evocative phrase? 😍 Thanks for being here. ❤️

The next phase of my life has begun and I am now a professional educator. Following with the theme of the above video, I am building a wall brick by brick, but for the purposes of this challenge, the wall I am building is my life, and as such I need it to be solid so it can last through the ages. Those bricks need to be sturdy and of the highest quality. In order to achieve that, I am going to work on the following: Classroom I have been holding classes now for about 3 weeks and the biggest challenge I have encountered in learning the names of all of the kids. I currently have 4 classes of just over 20 students each. I am of the opinion that it is hard to care about people if you don't know their names so my goal is to be able to match the names and faces of all 85 students by the end of the semester. Bonus points if I can learn them all by mid-terms Food I used to have a pretty good plan for what worked before school started, but now I need to rework things. I have 4 days that I am responsible for making sure dinner is on the table for Ghostlet (Mon-Thu) of which two of those days I will be teaching during his dinner time. As such, my plan is to do a lot more batch cooking on Mondays and Tuesdays (and maybe weekends if I am cooking) and make extra which can be kept in the freezer and thawed out for when Ghostlet is home by himself for dinner. The biggest variable is that often Ghostlet is at school late and can eat either in the cafeteria (his school cafeteria serves breakfast lunch and dinner) or at a fast food place just off campus. Exercise Because I am at school Wed and Thu, I only have 3 days in which I can go to the park to work out. Unfortunately, I also often have other things that take up my time so realistically I am looking at 2 times week. As such, my goal for this challenge is to make it to the park twice per week. I don't think that is really going to be enough, though, so I am going to try and supplement that with some evening exercise focusing on planche and handstand pushup basic strength exercises. Probably mostly pike pushups and planche pushups. Music I haven't learned any new songs on the piano recently, but I have identified a few I want to work on. I may not get them all (or any) down by the end of the challenge, but the point is to practice. I need to be working on at least one new song 5 days each week. Social I feel like I have been AWOL from NF recently so I want to try and get back into the swing of things here by being more active. That includes not only posting on my own challenge regularly, but also following along with all of the amazing people here.

Hmmm. Compost guest? Beautiful gift of body to earth? Plant flowers on lovely rich body-soil for future contentment? No, no, cannot use guest body without permission even if it would nourish flowers delightfully. Composting perhaps meant more abstractly. Hmmm. Unsure how to actually practice abstract composting.

Thank you for your solidarity. Exactly. Yup! We had 36 hours notice. Their return ticket is booked for the 20th. No idea if they are staying with us the whole time or not. That's what happened last time. I am very sensitive to sulking people, it really sets off my baggage. Solid loving advice, as usual. Thanks, Harriet. 💜 Thank you for validating my feelings. I can ask Dave to manage it, but I'm not sure it will change anything in a way that's favourable. Thank you. Yeah! Yikes! 😬😅 Sounds about right. So far nothing. I'm going to talk to Dave a bit more about it tonight and see what I can come up with. Thanks, All. You're helping me feel more level about all of this. 💜

Hi Sal! You are also amazing! Thank you for popping in here!! ❤️ Thanks, athousandwords. I appreciate hearing that. ❤️ I am going to do my best with that, but I am feeling hellishly unmotivated to do anything right now. I can’t tell if it is general resentment of the situation, my poor sleep the past few nights, or what, but I feel like I am in stasis mode right now. I hope this feeling passes. I really don’t like it and it compounds itself with feelings of inadequacy and incompetence. Thank you, my darling Philosopher Dragon. Lifting while I want to cuss at the houseguest might very well become a thing. We are not off to a smooth start. ❤️ You are not wrong! 😂 I wish that were an option. They spent all of their available money on the plane tickets so we are pretty much on the hook for everything else. Hi Friends, I will do my best to not (only) complain about the houseguest, but holy word this is going to be a trying experience for me, I can already tell. They have stayed with us before and some visits have been better than others, but this one is already off to a rocky start although it’s mostly in my head (which is what matters for me). This means I can do work to try and acclimate and change my attitude, but I get stuck in that loop where accommodation to make the best of something that is really bothering me that I can’t change rubs up on my damage from Earlier Life and well, yeah. That sucks. The current issue is Houseguest has started smoking weed again (they had quit the last time they were here) and I struggle with the smell and don’t particularly want the bong sitting on my kitchen table waiting for use. I don’t have a problem with marijuana use at all, other than I don’t like the smell and don’t particularly want the accoutrements hanging out. They are smoking in the yard, not in the house, so that is good. But it lingers on clothes and on the bong and the funk wears on me. Argh. I know from past experience that asking them to keep the bong in their room will build resentment that I don’t want to deal with, especially so early in the visit. I didn’t eat yesterday other than a packet of gluten free cookies and a vodka soda after work which is hardly ideal but I am struggling to care at the moment. I didn’t sleep well last night (ended up on the couch because Dave was snoring and Houseguest is in the guest room) and it’s impacting my mood pretty heavily today. I took my morning antidepressants as I usually do, but if I am not feeling better by the time I need to head to work I might take another tab to see if that helps boost things a tiny bit. With how little sleep I got last night I can tell this is going to be a rough day. The couches are great to sit on but a tiny bit too firm for comfy sleeping with my wide hips. Plenty long enough though, which was great as I am rather tall. I’d better get used to it as I could be spending quite a few nights down here as Dave’s seasonal allergies are acting up now that the snow is melting and the snow mold is doing its thing. Weight is holding steady despite my inattention to diet or exercise so I am going to take that as a blessing and be grateful for it. Maintenance is a win as one of my besties would say. I feel like this challenge could derail pretty hard if this visit remains a struggle. I will have to dig deep for the discipline to be checking off the Bujo goals every day. I hope that your home is a serene safe space today and that something blue makes you pause and smile. Thanks for being here. ❤️

That is what we are thinking, too. Interesting! Thanks, Harriet! We won’t know if we are going until next Spring quite likely. And this would be replacing the couch and loveseat we already have so it’s a substitution rather than a stock as such. I am less concerned about that part of things because if we go the Army arranges to move our household goods over there for us, so it is expected that we would have furnishings to furnish any place we rent. I’ve heard really good things about Blades in the Dark. It’s on my list. Bryon just got the book for Candela Obscura as well, so we might try that out in short order, too. MCDM is releasing play test stuff through their Patreon pretty steadily, but I am not subscribed to that any more because I am trying to save my pennies and pay off this debt. So I will wait and twiddle my thumbs as well. *lol* As I said above, the shipping part of things doesn’t concern me too much as there are policies in place for that kind of thing if we end up getting posted. But thank you. ❤️ I watched the CR one shot for Daggerheart (and their session zero character building stream) and really enjoyed what I saw. I need to watch the “how to play” videos because I am a bit confused about how things in combat work for the DM which is the role I’d be in, but I am excited to give it a go. There are a few things that you’d have to either watch for or have a really mature table to deal with (mature as in seasoned, not necessarily older) like the fact that combat is narrative at this point and there is no initiative order to make sure everyone is getting a turn while it is happening. I really enjoyed that, but I can see it not going well if you have someone at the table who hogs the spotlight, or someone else who struggles to speak up. The crit success system is fun (it’s a two d12 system, so if you get the same number on both dice you crit) but I didn’t notice a crit fail mechanism anywhere (I haven’t read the rules packet deeply yet) which seemed a curious omission. Not necessarily a bad thing, just curious. I enjoy the rolling “with Hope/with Fear” mechanic as far as I understand it, although need to read up on it more, too. All in all, it’s shiny and I am interested. Hi Friends! Off to a rougher start this morning. Had a very weird dream about being in some gothic version of the university I went to for my undergrad and being unable to access my timetable online so not being able to find my class. Other stuff was also happening that I no longer recall. Felt a lot of stress when I woke up. Plus it was cold in our room (Dave sleeps with the window open and it snowed again last night) so I was reluctant to get out of bed despite a headache and desire for coffee. Just a weird start. Dave decided to leave for work really early today and came in to get dressed. He leaned over me to give me a kiss while I was in bed and Saxon started growling at him. So I sat up and Sax still growled when Dave leaned in again. So I got up and stood and finally got my kiss. Dave was in his uniform while Sax was reacting and that always seems to be the case even though Sax hasn’t growled in a while. To be fair, I don’t think Dave has leaned over me in a while, either. Sax was a rehome from a military family who were going through a divorce and he gets very possessive of me and reactive when Dave looms over me, especially in uniform. Makes me wonder if there wasn’t some domestic violence going on in his first home because the reaction is very strong. He and Dave seem fine now (the growling reaction never seems to bleed into other reactions. As soon as Dave is no longer over me, Sax relaxes) and Dave has left for work. We are out of cream this morning so Dave didn’t make coffee and this did not sit well with me as I was headache-y and kind of whiny. So I asked him to go get me a coffee and bring it home before he went into the office. He agreed. I love that he is willing to do these kinds of things when they (very rarely) happen. We are normally very good about having what we need for coffee in the house - it’s a love language here. But I feel very loved when he takes the time to do these things for me. I was successful with no wheat and lots of veggies yesterday. We got Subway for supper and they have a new rice bowl option that I tried and it was a very reasonable thing to eat when you don’t want to have the sub bread. I enjoyed it quite a bit. It’s nice to know there is another fast food option that isn’t terrible in our tiny town. We played 2e last night (Pete died of poison and I will be unconscious for the next six days while I recover from the same poison - 2e is lethal) and it went well enough. I did eat most of a bag of sour gummies. I think I will need to make sure those aren’t on my side of the screen next time because I am pretty compulsive about gummies and will just tear through them. I definitely snack more when I am a player than when I am the DM. I knew that, but last night affirmed it yet again. I’d kind of forgotten because I haven’t been a player in almost 2 months. Today’s card was Mushroom (the Tower) from the Herbcarfter’s Tarot. Themes of transformation, decomposition, recycling, and nourishment as we begin something anew. I like this version of the Tower quite a bit, it’s more nurturing than alarming, at least for me. I will think on that today and see where it takes me. Off to do my lifts! I hope that you smell something so delightful and robust today that you can practically taste it. Thanks for being here. ❤️

Alright, our boy is a doctor! Now to imbibe a fry-up and wander over to the gym for a leg day. Possibly with an hour or two between those activities.

Yes! I'll join you. We'll sit by this jacked person, while drinking our tea, and grow all the muscles.

One of my mentors just called me out last week for not going out and having fun with friends anymore. Mostly because I've distanced myself from some people because all we did together was drink, and other people have moved farther away making regular hangouts difficult. And while you guys are absolutely fantastic, I would benefit from rebuilding my meatsuit party. So, towards that end I have: 1 - joined a local outdoor group on Facebook. Going to shoot for going to one outing with them this challenge. 2 - sent a message to my local gaming venue about what games are available. Heard back from them about some stuff, waiting for the discord invite to see what other games are currently running.

Maybe it's spring. Maybe it's hanging out with old people and not wanting to be like them. Or maybe it's the 18 month work break and finally recovering. But I feel like it might just be ready to challenge again! 🤯 My first keystone goal is to care of my sanity. I'm staying with my grandma who has Alzheimer's and it gets tiring. Her mood swings make me tense and her behaviors make me sad. Acknowledge this instead of hiding away in easy entertainment and then 4 days later wonder why I'm incapacitated after doing nothing. For this movement is key. I'm currently doing floor flow training and while some of it is technical, a lot of it touches on how to change state to easier get into flow. It's super interesting and the techniques and movements have been really helpful in connecting with how I feel and what I need, especially when combined with music. I've tried journaling and mindfulness and meditation in the past but it's never done anything for me, so discovering this is pretty cool. This ties in with my second goal, which is to do the homework as I'm terribly behind. Some of it I've done but haven't submitted because it requires minor video editing that I've been procrastinating. And some I've been procrastinating because it requires me to apply more... process for lack of a better word and it feels weird. One thing that's come up multiple times in the course Q&A sessions is what to do when things don't feel good. It can be physical niggles, or uncomfortable emotions coming up, or fatigue that's surfacing. And the answer's always a variation of approaching the resistance with curiosity and focus on feeling what is really happening in the body, rather than judgement or instantly trying to fix it or suppress it. I feel there's a life lesson here. And it's one I want to try and apply to art, where I have huge amounts of resistance to getting started but once I'm in it I'm happy. Goal 1a - Go to the gym every morning.* I was never a gym person, but in my current situation it's become a welcome escape, so I want to try going near daily, as an experiment. At the gym do a check in and decide what my body needs. More flow, more oomph (lifting), more play (handstands, using the gym equipment "wrong"...). *Unless I have other plans, go play outside, the weather's really bad or I really, really don't wanna. Goal 1b - Learn to love the lifting. Do the thing FFS as @sylph so eloquently put it. Goal 2 - Do all the things! Yes this is my goal, shut up. 😛 Floor training homework Website for mum Dissect mouse before someone finds it in the freezer Secret art related project Try out the local pole studios Finish leather bag Read a book Get a haircut my shaved part has grown so long it's starting to curl and it looks ridiculous Taxes Other money things Goal 3 - Finish BG3 (taking a note from @WhiteGhost here, and accepting that it will suck up my time until I'm done) Goal 4 - Let myself get as invested in art as in video games. I really want a more or less daily creative practice. Goal 5 - Show up here!! To help with this I'm going to try something of a routine. A baby step, experimental one as my track record with routines is... not great. Use my movement tools to face the Resistance. Am coffee, NF and deciding what on my to-do list I'd like to do today. Perhaps prep it so it's ready to go in the afternoon. Go to gym. Set an alarm to leave before 10-11 (?) in case I get distracted by stuff. Set another alarm for 13-14 (?) in case I still haven't started doing *a* thing. Have a bit of quiet floor time just after my grandma's gone to bed to shake off the day. Art will probably go under *a* thing, or maybe I'll add a separate block or... we'll figure it out. I won't start this "routine" yet, now it's easter and everything's closed, and then my mum will come to visit. But I'm going to do my best this challenge. (Uggh that felt awfully committing to write) Now to the gym before it closes!

Last challenge went really well, setting aside my foolish injury. I want to take another challenge to fully cement the habits before adding very much more. Some of the wording will be tweaked, but the goals will feel pretty familiar yo those of you who have followed previously. 1. Maintain the population of Draconis saccharum at its current low level. (Keep intake of added sugars below 15g/day 80% of the time.) I surpassed my expectations to drop my sugar levels last challenge. I had thought it would take several challenges to get to where I am now. I definitely want to keep the goal in the foreground, though, so those sneaky dragons don't repopulate while I'm not looking. I am dropping the time restriction as unnecessary. 80% works out to 31 of 39 days (including the rest of 0 week), so 8 days I am allowed to indulge a bit more on something really worth it. I want to really reflect on what I choose to spend my treats on and not just mindlessly eat trail mix or something dumb. 2. Continue to introduce strains of Draconis vegetabilis to the park. (Eat 2 servings of veggies every day.) I am dropping the timing constraints on this one too. Just eat the dang veggies. I probably should look for some new recipes to try, but I'm not quantifying that this challenge. 3. Conduct regular physical surveys of the park. (Swim + GMB Elements every 5 days) I am slightly increasing the frequency here from once a week to once every 5 days. It's a nice compromise between once and twice a week, since it will basically be a bonus workout every other week. 4. Not Baroque (Art "play" once a week) I want to take one day a week to just play with techniques/media without feeling the pressure of making something postable. I have been experimenting with different things, but the process has made me frustrated because I am putting the cart before the horse a bit and wanting to make great art before I have learned the techniques. So, once a week just play with loose sketches, blending, brushstrokes, whatever, and make unpostable art. I can make postable art other days, or even after play, if I want. But the point is to make room for play with no expectations.

You have so much to offer. ❤️ That is such a great gif. I think this meditation on downtime and security of future momentum is wise. Thank you. That sounds really interesting. Thanks Ever! This is all very solid. Thanks, Sea-to-sky. ❤️ Maintenance is definitely a win. I just struggle to see that sometimes without it being pointed out to me, so thank you for that. This extended visit has been challenging and the obstacles have certainly been pushing back hard. You’re right, I’ve done pretty well considering. This is interesting to think about. Thanks, Kishi. Me too! Thanks, athousandwords! We are going to do birthday lasagna tonight as Dave didn’t have much energy for anything last night. Thanks, Scaly. I think you are absolutely right, Snarky. I have a tendency to minimize my discomfort/setbacks/inconvenience/suffering (“suffering” seems like a dramatic word, but I am thinking of it in the Buddhist attachment sense here) due to Past Life crap, and I completely discount the recovery for that reason as well. Trying to be real about this kind of stuff and actually process it rather than move on from it by ignoring it is a bit of a challenge. I appreciate you affirming that I handled this okay. Hearing about the Visiting Uncle and your reactions and coping skills was very grounding for me. Thank you for sharing with me as you have. There will be. You are absolutely right. (I have no idea. Feels like it has gone so fast!) Thank you so much for these words. I take for granted these “superpowers” because I have always done them and extrapolate that into assuming other people do them with similar ease. It really did help that Dave took his turn on the couch (and that I found earplugs) and that he took Houseguest to the shop for a while. He is good at problem solving as long as he accepts that there is a problem. Thank you. ❤️ The walk did feel really good yesterday. I think I am going to make it a regular thing in good weather. This will be more convenient for Dave as well as he won’t have to arrange his day to get me to work. I am almost Houseguest free. Thank goodness. And thank you for spending a bunch of your time reading here to get caught up. I know how busy you are lately and I appreciate you spending the time with me. ❤️ RIGHT?? Nope! I love how this community shares information. ❤️ Lol Hi Friends! It is, as Heidi pointed out, Wednesday and I am almost Houseguest free! 🥳 It turned out to be a blessing that Houseguest went into the city with Dave to do the passport stuff because Dave had filled out the wrong paperwork for the passport and needed a guarantor for the correct paperwork and they could do that for him. So hooray for that. The new passport will be ready tomorrow afternoon and Dave will drop off Houseguest when he goes into the city and I will have my house and husband back for a few days before he leaves. Whew. The earplugs have been doing heavy lifting and I was able to sleep quite well last night. It snowed again so the bedroom was quite cold when I woke up this morning, but I had blankets and was quite content. Houseguest has stayed sleeping this morning so far so I got to have coffee and wake up with Dave and that was very nice. He’s just left for work so I am finishing up coffee, Bujos and Tarot, and now Forums. Then I am going to go into the basement and try to find an RPG sourcebook I am missing. It’s got to be down there somewhere. I am missing one or more players each week for the next seven weeks, so planning is going to be interesting. This week I have only two players (my wizard and my Druid) so that will be something to plan for specifically. I normally don’t run for just duets, but I really want to play this week so we are going to give it a go. Yesterday at work I had one of the gluten free brownies that we bring in and it was AMAZING. I never would have guessed it was gluten free. And now I know how good they are and will have to resist eating them all of the time. *lol* It was a nice pick me up in a good day. Dave was back in town in time to pick me up from work which was an unexpected and excellent surprise. We went and got the fixings for Instant Pot roast and made that for supper. Then we played more Heroes with Houseguest before crashing at 9:30. A pretty decent evening, really. Today is day three of my six day work week this week. I do get a two day weekend though, as I have next Monday off. I am happy about the two days. Makes the six in a row easier. I hope that your underroos fit you exactly right today. I am stuck between wildly too big and barely too small and it is so vexing. *lol* Thanks for being here. You’re all amazing. ❤️

2024 Road map Last challenge results Downtime Last challenge I burned out and bailed pretty hard, mainly because work was mega busy and life in general felt really tough. And then when I got to the end of the challenge, and I was no longer sitting on the sofa of an evening thinking 'I still need to tick off 4 of my 6 goals', I felt like a huge weight had been lifted. So, this challenge cycle, I'm doing less. I've deliberately posted this thread late, because on Monday and Tuesday this week work was mad busy (as I knew it would be). From today I've got 8 days off, so this seems like a better time to actually commit to showing up to the forums. With the obligatory gif out of the way, let's get into this shall we? Only two party members for this challenge, who are using their downtime between adventures in the time-honoured fashion of either making stuff or training. They are: The cartographer Goal: Draw every day [+3 CHA] This is the thing I did worst at last challenge, so it's getting special attention. I've still not cracked a regular drawing habit, so if anyone has any tips on getting to that or any idea where I can get more inspiration/accountability then please let me know. Ultimately I just want to get a pen or pencil in my hand for a few minutes every day. Things I could draw (just so that I don't get stuck on the thinking about what to do stage, this gives me an easy list of options): High Rollers fan art My current Pathfinder party My players' D&D characters The adventuring party I use for these challenges Animal drawing exercises from the drawing book I have Calligraphy practice from the calligraphy book WW bought me Draw along with the Sketching Hour on CNE Games Twitch. Stuff in the Quentin Blake drawing book I've only just remembered I have I found a cool April character drawing challenge online (under the spoiler below) Whatever else takes my fancy The muscle Goal: do my kneehab™ exercises every day [+2 STR] I buggered up my knee 8 weeks ago whilst out on a run, and it's pretty much no better now than it was then. I've been really good at sticking to the physio exercises for the last 3 weeks, because I'm doing them as part of my morning workouts and making them a priority, so I just need to continue with that. I saw the physio today and he basically said this just needs more time, so I'm focussing what I can control (kneehab) and hoping the rest will take care of itself. Other stuff I'll also be doing a lot of the usual stuff, I just won't be tracking it as part of this challenge to take some pressure off. That includes: I've signed up for the latest weight loss PvP, so I'll still be tracking calories daily and seeing if I can lose 11lbs in the next 12 weeks I'll be keeping my Duolingo streak alive (at 562 days currently) studying French and Dutch. I've also started playing with Lingopie for French. I'll be making an effort not to spend money most days, to build up some savings and stop frivolous spending I'll be going to the gym 4 times per week and climbing twice per week as ever, and I'm going to try and cement in the 3 times per week cycling in lieu of running Maybe clean the damn house occasionally? At least enough for the boiler service and the new internet installation. I actually started tracking my goals from Monday, even though I wasn't posting the challenge until today, so time to hit the ground (metaphorically) running.

1. Helpfully pay for guest's ticket to elsewhere. 2. Regretfully explain that ticket money was taken out of rice and beans fund. 3. Starve guest out of the house like a reverse siege. 4. Victory dance! 5. Chocolate pudding.

This morning I woke up to a good-news message in the family group chat: The x-rays and CT scans are completely free of signs of cancer. A referral to an oncologist has been made, but as of right now there is nothing for an oncologist to treat. Phew! I have today off work, because I really needed a break. H and I went to early lunch/late brunch at a local restaurant with a patio that overlooks the small river running through town. They have tall trees around the patio and large umbrellas, making it possible to enjoy the river view without suffering from too much sun exposure, and the food was delicious as it always is there. As we were eating, we noticed people walking on the greenbelt by the river, and H suggested we should take our daily walk right after the meal and explore along the the river. It was the most destressing walk I've taken in months and we have resolved to go back to the greenbelt for more walks in the future. I didn't have energy for a workout yesterday, but I've meditated both days, and I'm making an deliberate effort to make smarter choices when it comes to food and drink, because certain things like (sugar, caffeine, alcohol) feed The Flame, and we don't need that right now. The river of course has bridges along the greenbelt, to make it easy to cross back and forth. During our walk we past one that had a really nice view of the river, so I took a picture. We are facing the current here, if I dropped a stick into the water it'd drift towards us in under the bridge and keep going, and it would go fast. Swimming absolutely not permitted in the river at this time of the year. Spoiler tag because big photo.

If I may add to this suggestion.... when you do go out on this date night (not "if" -- "when"!), set a firm rule for both of you that you will not complain about, vent about, problem-solve about, or in any other way discuss, your guest. Because if you do, you're not getting the break from the guest that you need. the date night should be about the two of you. Also I want to second everything that A.P. said about setting time aside to discuss ground rules for this and other guests for future visits. Especially if the guest is going to insist on leaving paraphernalia out that make your anxiety worse.... because Artemis is right that in a partnership, what genuinely bothers one should automatically be a problem for the other. I'm not accusing Dave of anything , or you for that matter. I'm trying to suggest that you two work as a team to figure out how to make future visits less stressful for both of you, and for you in particular. I'm going to take a wild guess that you'd be a lot less reluctant to have this particular guest over for a visit if you didn't have to worry about things like second hand smoke and other irritants. You're impressing me with your patience and your determination to see this through with grace and positivity. Keep it up! You've got this.

I agree with @Kishi, you are dealing the best you can under the circumstances. One suggestion (that I might have missed) is to schedule some time for just you and Dave. That is especially important since he is leaving right after your guest will leave. You and Dave get to have some personal "date night" time over the two weeks that his friend is there. You don't have to schedule anything extravagant, just get some time to spend together without worrying about another person in the next room. Either send the friend away for the evening or you two go do something, whatever would be more relaxing for you.

Thank you everyone. Today is better. I didn't realize how much I've completely neglected several basic form of self care until last night, right after H. got back from the gym. He was getting ready to shower, so I followed him into the bathroom to bounce some dinner ideas off him. The dinner conversation taken care of, this exchange took place: H: Can I ask you something that might sound offensive, but isn't meant that way? Me: Sure. Of course. H: When was the last time you showered? *awkward silence* Me: ...I don't remember... *more, awkwarder, silence* H: Could I convince you to please shower before you come to bed tonight? Me: Ohgodyes. Absolutely. *embarrassed, gradually amused, silence* Me: Thank you for hugging me earlier. I felt considerably better after my shower. I spent yesterday evening sort-of by myself, logging into LOTRO to join a weekly social music-event, where the other regulars immediately took note of my complete lack of enthusiastic participation, and wondered whether I was playing tonight or not. After being told only that I'd had a rough week and was tired, they expressed sympathy and hopes that my weekend would be better and then they completely backed off, which allowed me to enjoy the event and their company, without needing to spend too much energy at it. HP (physical health) Saturday: Gym day! After skipping my workouts on Tuesday and Thursday, going to the gym and lifting a barbell was exactly what I needed. H. and I went together, which is fortunate since I would have struggled so hard to get there on my own I probably wouldn't have, if he hadn't nagged pushed for it. I did 15 minutes rowing machines, barbell bench press, and seated rows at a cable machine. Mana (mindfulness/mental health) ...forgot. Dammit. Stamina (emotional energy) I edited songs for my LOTRO musician again. Today's project was to try and convert a couple of Dragonforce tracks to being played on a solo instrument in-game. I think I got it! And now I'm drinking hot chocolate, because I watched this video and it inspired me. Mine isn't nearly as elaborate though.

The Painted Red Skeleton Steed's actual default name is the very boring and uncreative "Dusk". Obviously I had to give her a better one. That aside.... I've been ignoring challenge updates here for a while, and it occurred to me that I should explain why. Plus, it'll be nice to vent a little. I will spoiler the venting, because it involves cancer -- not my own. I am perfectly healthy. (Aside from the high blood pressure and the eczema and the asthma and the anxiety disorder..... But otherwise healthy!) So I'm going to go eat chocolate and hug a cat now, and then I will do a kettlebell workout at home so I don't have to go to the gym and suffer their very questionable music choices.

I think...Dave's friend sounds like a pain in the ass. I love that you are rolling with this but I think it's fair to set some ground rules of the house while you let him know where things are. "Welcome to our house! You can take off your shoes here." And "This is the dishwasher, just put your dishes in it when you're done using it." When my pain in the ass Uncle stays, my mom will say "What's your plan for the day?" which is just a nice way to find out if he's going to eat everything in the fridge that day. or she'll say "I'm making this for dinner, will you be joining us or do you have other plans?" and then she knows if she needs to cook him food too. She'll also say "Hey, these things are for meals this week, so they're off limits until then, but you can help yourself to all THESE things." Also set ground rules immediately about tobacco use, and bringing home other people (like "Hey, this is a tobacco free house, because I have a lot of allergies" "Hey, please dont' bring home any surprise people because it will freak out the dog." ) If he's going out in the evening, talk about when he'll be home and negotiate with your bedtime in mind so you're not staying up late waiting for him. Blame the dog again! Don't give him a key!! I know this all sounds kinda negative-focused, but we've done this with my uncle and it's a non-combative way to just set expectations. I hope he's not a pain in the ass. I hope he offers to chip in for groceries and cleans up after himself and is a lot of fun and charming. I hope the visit goes really well, and you can come back and say "He's not a pain in the ass! Yay!"

Today... was a start. In the morning I set a gym alarm for 10:45, but felt extremely unfocused and couldn't decide what to do and felt physically paralyzed. So I wrote down all the points of Resistance - Do I go to the gym now? (But I just showered... And pants hurt my skin...) Do I go to my other grandma? She made a cake. I hate going there, but guilt. What art or todo do I want to make later? In the end I tried to get my grandma to leave the house because it was the "right" thing to do. But then she refused and got irritated at me so I left the house for the gym. Because I didn't want to be like her. Perhaps not the best motivator but hey it did make me leave the house. Surprisingly, I had an amazing session! 😍 Positively delicious. I came in and felt that today might be a handstand day. Up until now I've only sprinkled in a few handstands here and there, this was my first session in a year or three focusing on them. But I approached them in a completely different way. It's very easy to get very obsessive with handstands, trying over and over and over again, standing in a corner of the room staring at exactly the same spot on the floor. Today I did a few things differently, to start learning how to add flow and improve movement quality: - Between each handstand attempt I'd walk around the room, listening to a delightful soul playlist, dancing around and doing yummy, grindy blues movements, hip circles and body waves. (Favorite strength challenge of the day was to do hip circles and see how low I could go while keeping the movement smooth. My poor quads! 😄) - I didn't come to a full stop before attempting the handstand, instead I was mindful of how I placed my hands down on the floor, moving softly and only pushing when I needed to push. - Every time I fell out of the handstand I tried to use the momentum of the fall to do something else, like a roll or a spin, instead of jerkily stopping and going straight to the next attempt. - No camera to get obsessed about form. Feeling what my body is doing but without correcting everything straight away. I'm still extremely limited in how I enter the handstand, and I still can't help counting once I'm in it (curious if this is an ego thing or a focus thing) and my exits are far from smooth. But this felt SO good. And it allowed me to work on handstands for a lot longer as my strength endurance is very poor. I was beaming the whole way back. It was so warm and sunny I stayed out for a bit longer, sitting on a bench, listening to music, enjoying myself. In the evening I did a bit of art but it was really hard and I used up my focus juice very quickly. Brush pens are tricky yo. They require soooo much control. And inking an iguana with very few pencil guides is not a good noob project. It was fun, but I didn't last very long.

Taylor Tomlinson is having a goddamn moment. She's from a similar background as me and her humor hits like self-evident observations about my reality, but somehow American millennials are vibbing with her in a major way. Three specials so far and hosting the new Colbert-produced "After Midnight" show, our girl is slaying. Her 2019 5:00 set from Conan A 4:54 clip from from her 2020 Netflix Special "Quarter-Life Crisis". And finally, a 3:15 clip from her 2023 special "Have it All". [AI image generated by HotPot.AI with the prompt "The comedian Taylor Tomlinson as a Vampire Slayer, wielding a microphone as a weapon."] Slayer Training Lore Reading in bed by 11pm - 5x/week ✅ ✅ ✅ 🔲 🔲 Duolingo streak by noon - 7x/week ✅ ✅✅ 🔲 🔲 🔲 🔲 Meditation Ass on meditation pillow - 7x/week ✅✅ ✅ 🔲 🔲 🔲 🔲 Bodhrán meditation 3x/week 🔲 🔲 🔲 Strength Bench 3x3 55% 3x8 70% HIT 15 mins Life Stuffs Liam is officially a doc! Thanks to all the nerds here who blew him up yesterday, he felt so supported and engaged in the presentation. He can't drop a copy of the dissertation here but he's checking if his publisher will let him share the slides. Hungover as heck after all the focus yesterday. We grabbed a midday diner breakfast on the way home and both of us were crashing before we finished our food. Very glad we're doing his grad party on Saturday instead of trying to cram it all into one day. I maaaaay have received 22 lbs of beads in the mail yesterday. Maybe. I've already made a few pieces with the new swag, I'll try and post pics tomorrow. We've recently dubbed Wednesdays as Rotisserie chicken day. It's pretty fantastic to bring home hot dinner for $6 and no one has to cook. Having vision problems today from stress-related neck tension and postural stress adjusting to the CPAP. Taking Motrin and using a heating pad while my period cramps tension headache calms down.

It is most definitely as sign. Hi Friends, I am not going to reply to everyone’s supportive comments on this post because it’s a lot, but THANK YOU SO MUCH for your assurance and care. I really appreciate the overwhelming sense of community and support and I am once again delighted and affirmed by the level of compassion in our community, ❤️❤️❤️ The anxiety ball in me also really appreciated being told in no uncertain terms that I wasn’t doing anything wrong. *lol* I have today off work today. I took a three day weekend so that hopefully Dave and I can spend some quality time together now that he is more awake than he was at the beginning of the week. I am happy to be off. Today will involve a lot of game prep for tonight but Dave wants to play video games all day so I am not neglecting him. I am quite excited about game tonight (The Drakkin “Baby” is going to be born!) and looking forward to making it memorable. I went and did another InBody scan this morning after significantly reducing my wheat consumption since Monday. I am *very* pleased to report that my inflammation numbers went from the highest they had ever been to the second lowest! I am so very excited about this. It also didn’t hurt that my weight went from 268.0 to 263.5 which was of course all water, but yay for that anyway. My fingers feel less stiff and sore and all of the rest of my joints feel better. Dave said I am moving better as well, which is great. I don’t notice when my movement goes off, but it makes sense given that my joints are all gross. I am very grateful for the InBody scan giving such discreet information; I would have no idea what I needed to change if I were relying solely on a gravity scale just saying the weight is going up. I am going to keep wheat for special occasion foods and avoid it in the day to day. Kind of the 80/20 rule, except maybe more strict. 90/10? 95/5? We will see how it plays out. I can keep an eye on the inflammation with the readouts, but I usually only go at the start of every challenge, so every six weeks. I will have to become more sensitive to body cues if I don’t want to be going more often than that. The trouble is that it generally takes a fair amount of exposure before I start to notice the pain, although I am sure the inflammation is quietly doing its thing even when I don’t notice it. Oh bodies. I hope that you are feeling right and tight in your body today and that you have ease of movement and satisfying thoughts. Thanks for being here!! ❤️

In completely random news: today is World Down Syndrome Day. TimovieDaughter remembered this morning, and put on mismatched socks in solidarity. So I did the same. I'm wearing one grey sock and one black sock with white stripes. And the odd thing is: I have another such mismatched pair in my sock drawer... 😅

Spring has arrived, so it's time to shake off the winter blues and get back in shape for the summer. After two half-hearted and failed attempts at a respawn this year, I'm ready to give it another go. With the start of spring, I'm hoping the weather will improve significantly. The previous six months have seen a LOT of near-constant rainfall here, so I'm more than ready for clearer weather, which I hope will help to get me out of this rut I'm in. I've been calling it the "winter blues", and I'm pretty sure the weather is - at least partly - to blame. And with spring being here, and the goal of getting back in shape (i.e. getting my "summer bod"), the theme for this challenge was clear: TimovieMan's Spring Respawn: From Winter Blues to Summer Bod I'm dusting off my logging system, and getting it back into action again. No massive pressure to do too much, the challenge is just to start logging again. If done properly, and knowing myself, the rest will follow... Bad Poor Ok Good Excellent Frequency Notes Intermittent fasting < 14 hours ≥ 14 hours ≥ 16 hours ≥ 17 hours ≥ 20 hours Daily Calorie intake > 4000 cal > 3000 cal ≤ 3000 cal ≤ 2400 cal ≤ 2000 cal Daily Ballpark figures are good enough Calories spent < 2750 cal ≥ 2750 cal ≥ 3000 cal ≥ 3500 cal ≥ 4000 cal Daily Fitbit numbers Calories in/out deficit < 500 cal < 0 cal ≥ 0 cal ≥ 500 cal ≥ 1000 cal Daily Curfew ≥ 1.30 am ≥ 1.00 am < 1.00 am < 0.30 am < 0.00 am Daily Add 2 hours before non-working days Sleep < 5h 30m < 6 hours ≥ 6 hours ≥ 6h 30m ≥ 7 hours Daily Fitbit numbers - naps count for half Avg. sleep < 6 hours ≥ 6 hours ≥ 6h 15m ≥ 6h 30m ≥ 6h 45m Weekly Fitbit numbers - naps count for half Steps < 6.000 ≥ 6.000 ≥ 8.000 ≥ 10.000 ≥ 12.000 Daily Fitbit numbers Avg. steps < 9.000 ≥ 9.000 ≥ 10.000 ≥ 11.000 ≥ 12.000 Weekly Fitbit numbers Distance < 15 km ≥ 15 km ≥ 20 km ≥ 25 km ≥ 30 km Weekly Walk to Mordor distance Workouts ≤ 1 > 1 > 2 > 3 > 4 Weekly Mini-workouts: 1/10 per exercise Days with (mini)-workouts ≤ 3 4 5 6 7 Weekly That should get me started in this challenge. There's another walking challenge that's starting at work in a couple of weeks. Basically, the idea is to collectively accumulate 150.000 km in four weeks, and if we succeed, the company will plant 75.000 trees in the Great Green Wall of the Sahara and the Sahel in Africa. I've participated in this the previous two years, so doing so again will just be extra incentive to go for regular walks. And it won't hurt on the Road to Mordor either... 😅 As usual, posts in my thread often are accompagnied by music. Here's the compelling Cranberries song "Ode to My Family". Because a song about a yearning to return to the simple life as a child kinda hits home when I notice that it's been over SIX years already that singer Dolores O'Riordan passed away. Suddenly I felt like I was getting old. Despite still feeling 24 in my head. So I reinforce the "I'm still young" feeling by singing "do do do do"... 😇 The Cranberries - Ode to My Family

I am still getting over a horrible virus so right now the current plan is to take things slow and not push myself too much til i am feeling better. Definitely a time for being kind to yourself and not trying to juggle too much. that said, i am going to put a few small goals on here, which the possibility of adding more when my energy levels are less dire. the majority of this i am very much going to be playing by ear and try not to push myself too hard til my energy levels bounce back. reduce the TBR: this went well last month so is going to continue. Trying to get through more of my to be read pile is going to be ongoing as it is quite big, but progress is good for my mood and my shelf space. as per last time, trying not to buy any more books. Though i will allow myself a couple of new ones i desperately want if i can stick to the “do not buy more books” throughout the rest of the month. Food that loves you back @Harriet mentioned this in another topic and it got me thinking. When i am at a low point health wise i am prone to comfort eating highly processed empty calories. Which is kind of the opposite of what you need when recovering from something. This is a habit i want to break in the long run as it does not serve me well health or happiness wise. so, goal is to cook some new foods and see if i can find healthier alternatives. things i enjoy i can reach for instead of the usual endless fried snowballs, sugar and chocolate. 1-2 new recipes a week (energy levels depending). try to make healthy choices as well as fun ones. Preferably low complexity so i can repeat next time i get a bug. sleep cycle to aid with the recharging, im continuing to try for good sleep habits. this goal did not go the best last month, due partly to life getting very stressful half way through. Now everything is back to some form of normality i want to try again. So, as before. Lights out 10-10:30 pm. i also felt i needed to sort the other side of the equation, so for this round i am going to try get up at a sensible time (eg. within half an hour of waking up, or 7:00 if before then. Maybe give myself one lie in a week. Im thinking sundays?) Afternoon nap i hate them but right now its needed. CFS/M.E lashback after a virus is not the most fun so i need to do the sensible things. Build the Bard skills Besides learning new tunes, i want to crack chords on the mandolin. as im a session player this means also learning the guitar chords and which mandolin chords correspond to them so i can copy others when i tune i don't know come up (which will be just about all of them as im new at this) . upside: i did used to play guitar, so have some familiarity with the guitar chords. downside: mandolin chords are so completely different it is going to be a certain amount of relearning things to stop making the wrong G chord shape automatically. Practice mandolin 2x a week at some point, i want to crack crosspicking, but right now i think not pushing the boat out too far, too fast is probably sensible. Room sorting Due to last month going to pot, this kind of fell by the wayside slightly. But its now back on the agenda. chances are this will flip over to the next challenge, but the to do list currently reads -finish sorting book shelves -sort top of desk -finish sorting boxes -sort and organise art supplies -finish sorting jewellery hoard (be more ruthless) -sort top of cupboard - frame and hang pictures - take things to charity shop -go through blanket box want to go back to trying to do a little a day as it does make good progress.

Hey, here we are with yet another challenge that is almost a duplicate of the one before, but if it ain't broke, right? And isn't the beauty of year-long goals that I don't have to come up with new ones each challenge? So let's jump to it: 1. Become an Ordained Deacon in the ACNA My current class runs just a couple weeks past the end of this challenge. So my goals for this challenge are to 1 - Keep up with class assignments 2 - Register for my summer class 3 - Finish meeting with my Parish Discernment Committee (meetings scheduled for April 10 and 17) 2. Strength GainZ The stars have aligned to have my next training block kick off in Week 1 of this challenge! I love when that happens. Reducing my current workout goal to 2 lifting sessions per week. It's all lunges, rows, and deadlifts as currently scheduled, so going to think about how I want to add some pushing work in. Also going to swap barbell rows out for dumbbells. Cardio-wise, going to shoot for 2 cardio workouts a week, and one must be a run. I've got a 5k to do on May 4th, after all! Side note - I just got a Fitbit because it came up cheap in an auction and so far I'm having fun playing with it. Not incorporating its metrics into any goals at the moment, but this may be a future development. 3. Finish Barndominium Top priority now that the weather should be more cooperative is getting the siding stained. Not going to stress about getting it all done this challenge, though, because that really is 100% weather dependent. Also going to work on finishing interior walls, then possibly ceiling work or maybe skip right to getting the deck on so apartment work won't require hauling things up a ladder. I also want to add a hot line to my fence, which technically isn't part of the barn, but I'm including it here.

I like art groups, they help me move forward when I get into devision overwhelm. Plus, it's fun to see how others interpret the prompts and what materials/styles they use. I started with Inktober52 last year and have tried out several new ones this year. I may have just joined another one, Landscape Art Club. I am starting to collect art clubs like plants 😂 It's for indoor gardening in poor weather (like today). Thank you very much! I am thinking those are the best match to go in my garden, too. The clematis would echo the colors in my Japanese maple nicely without being too on the nose. And peachy-pinks go with everything. It was a windy, rainy day, so I mostly stayed indoors. I did GMB Elements workout 3 of 7 in the garage gym. Swim 3 of 7 is scheduled for tomorrow. Strictly speaking, it was supposed to be swim yesterday and GMB tomorrow, but I decided to rearrange things for more convenience as I have to take my kids to Survival Camp quite near the gym tomorrow (and wait 3 hours to pick them up) it made more sense to just swim that day and save on gas and running around. I made an effort to try roasted (or rather, air-fried) cauliflower at lunch. It was okay but nothing to write home about. Diet is still very messy right now, but at least all the Easter cakes are finally gone.

....because giving you fair warning would completely ruin the surpise because you can't be trusted not to tell Dave? I agree with everyone else, you are being gracious and patient, and you deserve a ton of credit for adjusting to what undoubtedly was an unwelcome surprise to you as well. A suggestion if I may? While the surprise visitor is visiting, take them aside for a private conversation. Explain patiently and politely about the surprise plan you had made for Dave, that you had to cancel on short notice. Then explain how you would really have appreciated being made aware that the visit was coming, so you could participate in surprising Dave, rather be turned into a spectator for something that's happening in your home, and may cost you money. In my world it goes without saying that an unexpected guest stays for a week or longer, and their stay causes an increase in household expenses, the guest contributes, and if they're not willing to do that, they can stay elsewhere. I acknowledge that's not everyone's world, but to me it simply seems like the decent thing to do.

Nerd time! Most online calculators use the Mifflin-St. Jeor equation to calculate your BMR, which is based on your total body mass. Plugging in your numbers, that gives me a BMR of 1952. I am assuming that your InBody scan is using the Katch-McArdle equation, which is based on your lean body mass. (There's also the Harris-Benedict equation, but that's an old one that's mostly been replaced by the Mifflin-St. Jeor.) There's a lot of debate over which formula is more accurate. At the end of the day, they're all estimates. Your BMR is just the calories burned to maintain bare minimum essential bodily functions. It does not consider activity at all. For your stats, I get these numbers for activity levels: Sedentary: 400 calories Light Activity: 700 calories Moderate Activtiy: 1,000 calories Heavy Activity: 1,400 calories Very Heavy Activity: 1,700 calories So your Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE) is your BMR plus whichever activity level fits your lifestyle. Just for an example, we'll go with Light Activity, giving us a range of 2,051-2,352 depending on which BMR calculator you use. One pound of fat equals 3,500 calories. So to lose 1 pound/week, you need to be in a 3,500 calorie deficit, which averages out to a 500 calorie deficit per day. That means, to lose 1 pound of fat per week, your estimated caloric intake is 1,551-1,852. Depending on what your current caloric intake is, I would pick a number in that range that feels easily doable, try it for a while and adjust from there. Since all these numbers are estimates, they make good starting points but will probably require tweaking. If 1,852 sounds daunting, you could always go with a 250 calorie deficit (1,801-2,102) and shoot for a 0.5 pound weight loss per week. Also, instead of picking a number and shooting for it, you could just stick with the range if it feels more helpful to have some flexibility rather than nailing down an exact number you're trying to hit.

I've kept the same goals over the last few challenges. I like that set up. There are different guestimates on how long it takes to build a habit, but I feel like I'm in the it takes longer than you think camp. I'm finally nailing the goals I was working on, and next month may level up.

This challenge was really successful for me in terms of habit building although not as successful in terms of weight loss as I keep hovering within a four pound range that refuses to drop for some reason. I have some theories so I will be seeing what comes of them next challenge. I had been really nervous with some of our friends leaving that we wouldn’t be as attentive to each other this time around, but I found that people really stepped into those absences and the love and support was unwavering. My partner was deployed for this challenge which means I lean on the forums more heavily for my socialization and company, so it was wonderful that everyone here was still holding fast. I am hopeful that this coming challenge sees me return to barbell lifting for the first time in many years. Just waiting to see how soon my partner’s sleep schedule turns around and what we can do to get that going. Congratulations to everyone on their wins and wisdom! ❤️