Talia

So I know it was waaaaaaaay back there when I last posted here - but I'm going to pop an update here in case anyone wants to read it! TMI Alert - there's a lot of detail here that is pretty personal - fair warning! Things got mighty crazy right after my last post in Sept. Saw the Dr. Had some tests with the goal of finding the source of pain. An Ultrasound had revealed some anomalies with an ovary so we scheduled surgery. Sept/Oct resulted in a MAJOR merger at work and I got exactly ZERO time to do anything. So exploratory surgery was early Nov - looking for endometriosis and to figure out what was up with the weird ovary. Surgery reveals - fibroid the same size as my uterus.. attached to the back of my uterus... pressing on - TAHDAH - MY SCIATIC. We've found the source of the pain and the reason for the cyclical nature (stupid monthly cycles making things worse) of the pain. SO.. That led me to we need another surgery. The fibroid was too big to remove during the laparoscopy so I have to go through the full on abdominal myomectomy. That means cut me open just like a C-section and take out the bugger. Needs to be done ASAP... so that was scheduled for a few weeks later. The kicker - if the fibroid is super attached to my uterus they may have to do a full hysterectomy. I'm 32.. seriously stressful. Then began the 80 hour weeks at work to get things done for year end 3 weeks earlier than normal. Still with me? lol Big surgery went awesome. No hysterectomy (yay! for keeping all important body parts!) I, on the other hand, was struggling to be able to take pain meds. Everything they gave me made me sick - let me just say... throwing up right after they cut you open sucks more than anything I've ever experienced - so I had almost no pain meds 24 hours after surgery. AWESOME. Thankfully the hospital offers acupuncture and gods bless that man for helping me with pain. Finally got all that worked out - spent 4 days in the hospital. Came home and did NOTHING but rest for 3 weeks. Pretty much bedrest - that made the holidays blah. Went back to work on 1/8 and its been tough but going mostly ok. I'm still super sore and very tired. Should have been out another 3 weeks, but sadly I just cannot be out of work that long without totally screwing my job. SO - The result is - so far no back pain. Which is nothing short of amazing after all the pain I had been experiencing. I am cleared to start doing Yoga as of today so I'll be doing that in the morning. Looking forward to moving again! No serious workouts until 2/1/14 - then I have to ease into walking/running - then on 3/1/14 I can start weight lifting again. Sorry for disappearing on everyone - I just needed to step back and deal with the crazy! There's the update! I'll be lurking this 6 week challenge and cheering people on!

BRUTESQUAD!!! Good to see you John! *hugs* Just wanted to say hi! I'm lurking... but 6 weeks from now I'll be clear for participation and in the meantime... more lurking As I expected - tons of WIN all around here

Ok - I'm crawling out of the self pity hole finally. Still no working out - though I am starting to feel much better so I am going to give it a go this week. Tylenol is making me pain free so at least with good management I can get through my day easier than the last couple weeks. One more week until I see the Doc again and get the surgury plan figured out. Honestly I'm hoping they can get me scheduled fast and perhaps get me pain free asap! Saturday spend the entire day outside running Twin Cities Pagan Pride day. SUPER Hot here but the event went well and it felt good to be out and about. I stayed on top of the tylenol and spent most of the day pain free so that was awesome! I have very much missed being active and I don't think I realized how much until Sat. Starting to feel like myself finally....

Thanks John - a hug is really what I need. You're right - I'm uber disappointed and sad. I know I'll get there and this is just a setback, but still. I'm struggling to deal with that productively and the recent bout of constant pain is not helping. You're right - I need to stop dwelling on it and just get things taken care of so I can get back on track. It really IS time to stop feeling sorry for myself.... which I can readily admit I've been doing since Sat for sure. No walk/run last night - ended up grilling a bunch of stuff I got at the CSA and freezing it for later use. Went to bed early and actually managed to get some sleep, so that has helped my overall mood today. I definitely haven't felt like myself lately and its time to get out of this funk. I'm workin on it.. I really am workin on it - I feel like eyore lately LOL.

Finally an update! Met with my nutritionist on Friday and had an excellent consultation. She is recommending some additional supplements and for me to go ahead with surgury. I felt better about things after talking with her. I Ran the 10K on Saturday - it went ok. Still has some back pain from last week and it steadily got worse during the race. I did finish and I'm proud of that, but the experience cemented the fact that I need to dial things back and figure out whats going on if I'm going to ever hope to run long distance races. This made for a depressing weekend as I mourned yet another failed attempt at the marathon and tried to tell myself I am not a total failure. Before you judge me - I KNOW its not a failure, just a setback and I KNOW that I need to be healthy first, and I KNOW that if I hadn't been training I wouldn't have made all the advances I have made that are awesome... but I still FEEL like its a failure and that makes me sad. Sunday I spent the entire day out at a park working on the final details of a volunteer event I'm coordinating on Saturday. I was kinda sore, but not really, since I didn't work that hard on Sat (the back pain kept me from pushing it at all) and it felt nice to be outside in cool beautiful weather. I did some foam rolling and stretching, but that's it. Back pain is still necessitating pain meds every 4 hours... not cool. Monday I skipped the gym and spent the entire day deep cleaning/re-arranging/organizing my house! It felt so good to give everything the once over, plus it was good for my muscles to move in ways they don't usually.Back pain still hanging on and starting to drive me bonkers. Tuesday back to work - normal hours and my usual schedule! Finally feeling kind of normal, except for the lack of sleep that comes with chronic pain. No gym - just stretching and foam rolling. Evening was my last nutrition class, which was kind of sad! I really enjoyed it for the last 12 weeks! Today - up on time but too much pain to go to the gym again this morning. I'm going to try and go for a walk/jog tonight. I did stretch and foam roll, that helped. Thank goodness for tylenol! On a good note my last two classes started and it looks like it will be a fun 8 weeks! Well that's the latest - not much to report and certainly not the big wins I was hoping for as we enter the last week of this challenge.

The pain continues... went to the Dr. Again, to mostly complain that no one seems to have any idea why I have random bouts of debilitating sciatica pain on my right side. Couldn't see my normal Doc on short notice so I saw one of the others. She was AMAZINGLY helpful. New working theory on the source of the pain... endometriosis. No one has considered this so far! Most women have other symptoms too - I don't - but she seems to think it explains the cyclical nature of the pain bouts and the exact location. It explains my weird symptoms according to her - but the only way to know for sure is exploratory surgury, so we're progressing cautiously. I go back in two weeks for some tests to rule out other possibly issues and then we'll decide what to do. I'll know more after that. Honestly the pain has been a huge factor in me not being able to run/workout as much as I'd like so if we could find a cause and resolve it my life would get so much better! Not that I want to have surgury.... but at this point I may do anything to deal with the pain so I can progress to my goals. I've made an appointment with my nutritionist for Friday to discuss this with her - I'm curious what she will think of the developments. I don't see my accupuncturist until the 13th but I'll discuss it with him too. Anyway - Tues is rest day and I have a run tonight. We shall see how it goes - I'm gonna give it a go even with the back pain. I do find if I can soldier through the pain I feel better faster. I'm between classes this week which is so nice - I needed a break. Last two classes for this degree start Monday!!!! Half Marathon is supposed to be Sat but I think I've decided at this point to only do the 10K... the pain has cemented that but also its going to be like 100 deg here Sat and heat is not my friend.

Nice work Monkey! Those are pool distances I can only dream of with my flopping around... thank goodness for the running belt or I might drown in the pool

Well look at you kickin ass and takin names! Nice Job! Your workout looks awesome

Thanks guys - we shall see how the next month goes. I had more pain this weekend so I missed yet another long run. This is becoming a problem. Onward I guess... Otherwise last week went really well - I got my runs in and felt great! My speed is picking up which is really important. Last week was finals for school and those went well. I'm off this week and then new classes start on the 2nd and they will be my last 2 classes for this degree! WOOHOO! Things have been incredibly stressful and I've taken on a lot more than I should have Its horribly hot here this week and I'm stressed about the race this weekend. Given everything I may be doing the 10K just to be sure that I don't end up with heatstroke. For all my training I'm still very heat sensitive. I'm already working on a long term plan to continue my marathon goal - one that is spread out over the next year and has more races in it!

Thanks guys! I appreciate the support and encouragement! I'm certainly not giving up on the marathon goal! I will run Grandma's in the spring and try for this one again next fall if I can't do it. I'm seriously toying with the idea of starting it no matter what - and if I can't finish I can't finish but at least I put in the effort. I'm still putting in the work as if I AM going to run and I'll decide later if its not been enough. HEALTHY matters and I don't want to hurt myself - but I'm definitely going to put in some serious work to make it happen! I have to really look at the positives of this journey and how far I've come. This isn't about a marathon - its about me getting my health back and its been a long road - but I'm finally on the good side of it

Glad the back is improving! As someone who is constantly plagued with back pain I can appreciate the frustration! Something my running coach told me - you get almost the exact same cardiovascular benefit from swimming as running (like 90%) so you aren't hurting yourself necessarily with more swimming since it gives you almost the same cardio benefit but won't result in overtraining injuries! Just make sure you get some training runs in because obviously you need to condition your musculo-skeletal system to handle the work, but you aren't necessarily hurting your running with the extra swims! Nice work!

Ok Joy - I want to be supportive but I'm going to make a radical suggestion ... you aren't eating enough!!! That's why you are so tired in the morning! Your body needs fuel to keep your metabolism up and help you burn fat. When you don't eat ALL DAY the way you have been, everyday, your metabolism slows and you actually do damage to your body. Intermittent fasting means once in a while - not every day. I don't think you are helping yourself at all by starving your body. I'm not saying you should binge - but healthy balanced sensible meals are so important. I would encourage you to look at a book called The Schwarzbein Principal and really change how you fuel your body. I learned the hard way that you have to fuel your body properly or you could do serious damage! If you're hungry you NEED TO EAT!!! *end rant*

So quick update. Not much to report really... running running and more running. I'm feeling awesome but I'm starting to mentally prepare for the possibility that I'm not going to be ready to run the marathon. I'm still pushing forward and things a so good, my training is starting to feel good instead of feeling like I'm dying I am really really struggling with my long run distances. I'm just not there - and I can't seem to get there. I know I lost a lot of base building with some of the other issues I've had to work through during the last 8 months and I may just have to face the fact that I'm too far behind to safely get there in time. I'm not making that decision yet ... on Oct 1 I'll decide where I'm at and if I feel its safe for me to try and run the marathon. I'm more concerned right now about the 1/2 I'm supposed to run in a week.... The longest long run I can get in is about 10 miles... NOT nearly enough. I can fall back at that race to a 10K but I won't decide until the day before if I'm going to do that. I'm starting to realize that this is not something I'm "just doing" and over training to try and be ready only to injure myself is not a good idea. I can always register for more races and keep training until I get to where I want to be! It does feel great to finally be training in way that feels great and productive and like I'm progressing! I had so many setbacks early on and to finally have worked out the kinks and be clicking along is great. I'm trying to see this as a WIN for my progress and not the potential to fail yet again at running this marathon...

+2 So much WIN with this race - congratulations!!!!!!!

Oopps... duplicate post somehow...