Elk

Aw, thank you! ;_; That means a lot!

Hey! I like your challenge. It seems like you've chosen goals that suit you well. Plus, I know what it's like to have mental health challenges for sure, so I can relate. X.X; I totally get how overeating healthy food can lead to that feeling of deprivation! It's a difficult balance to strike. I think that, on the path to becoming healthier, our relationships with food and our bodies can become adversarial... when ideally, I think, our mental, emotional and physical selves are acting cooperatively for an outcome that's really healthy for all parts of us. Easier said than done! Also, what do you mean by mindfulness? Like, how do you practice it?

Wow, I really like that. That's a really useful way of thinking about it, and it definitely rings true. It's encouraging to know that what I've been experiencing is actually... you know, a recognized thing!

Dang, good for you! The workouts sound so intense. Did you do any form of exercise before that?

Damn, lady, you are a badass!! How did you discover Krav Maga?

So, my anxiety has been terrible. Like debilitating. It's funny... as I introduce more mindfulness to my life, I'm starting to find the places that are really causing me a lot of stress, and they're coming out. I think it's got to get worse before it gets better - I want to dismantle those old, anxiety-producing modes of though and replace them with healthy ones. I think it might be time to switch to decaf and cut out the sugar. :/ For my mental health, yo.

Thanks! Just through trial and error, I've really found that starting with small goals works much better. When I set the bar too high, I just get so stressed out trying to meet my goals. It's less effective and not worth the pressure. Hahaha, yeah! Whenever I'm there, all of my healthy intentions seem to exit the building. Thankfully I'm only there a couple days of the week. And thanks! I'll check yours out too!

I didn't eat very well at work today. :/ Tomorrow's goal: eat a banana and peanut butter for breakfast, and choose a healthy option for lunch! working in a bakery is tough. @.@ Think I'll do yoga tonight. Or work out. Later. Yep! And I need to meet my goal of asking someone to talk to me. Gonna be my boyfriend. Most practical choice.

Oh boy, I have a lot of anxiety today about food today. :S As I become more mindful about food, I'm starting to really see how it relates to old pain. Last night, as I was lying in bed, I realized that I developed an unhealthy relationship with food - hating myself for eating, binging, etc - as a way of internalizing negative emotions that I was unable to express. So once I start approaching food more mindfully, and actually - God forbid!! - enjoying eating, the old pain comes up. Then, in order to get to sleep, I decided to do something that I used to do a lot to help me sleep... ate a bunch of carbs. But I did it mindfully. And... it didn't work. Nighttime eating used to numb me, but now it doesn't. So that's where I'm at. Things get better but it's tough. i___i

It's so cool that you're working on identifying your triggers! It seems like you've developed a lot of insight after just a couple of days. I've been doing something similar lately, actually, and something that helped me understand my relationship with food is the "white bear effect." http://www.ndoherty.com/white-bear/http://www.ndoherty.com/white-bear/ Basically, the idea behind it is that when you try to suppress something, you will want it more. So if you're trying to suppress a desire to binge, it's going to have the opposite effect - you're going to want to binge more. What do you think of this?

Alright, today! -Met my small goal! -Did work out once! -Ate pretty mindfully! I listened to my body's hunger and fullness signals - I didn't finish all of my food at breakfast or dinner, and instead of having a big mug of hot chocolate to satisfy my chocolate craving, I was satisfied with a small teacup! I still have to do something artsy though! I think I'll doodle some storyboarding stuff. :>

Dang, you've got a lot going on! I think it's cool how you're taking stock of your whole life like this, though. It seems like you're going for all-around wellness. What kind of artwork do you make? And what's this art challenge of which you speak?

I did the 30 days in January! She is so wonderful and makes yoga so fun and easy.

WORKOUT PLAN WEEK 4: Thursday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBPP_izKKSs (x) Friday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWPpdP4IhEY (x) Saturday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F8aOQza68E (x) WEEK 5 Sunday: yoga (x) Monday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYkWDrKlCfE (x) Tuesday: yoga (x) Wednesday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uT2Oje5ukd4 [oops, that was a link to a j-pop video... lolol] Thursday: activating morning sequence (x) Friday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mDyGogsMtQ Saturday: (x) WEEK 6 Sunday: ( ) Monday: (x) Tuesday: Wednesday: (x) Thursday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgPICTHJ_Ug

DAILY GOALS WEEK 1 Monday: Start a nerdfitness challenge! (x) Tuesday: Go to the gym! (x) Wednesday: Do a yoga class at the YMCA! ( ) - failed owing to poor time management (turns out I was carrying home a piano when yoga class was on, lolol) Thursday: Just... be nice to myself. Ask to talk to someone about some worries. (x) Friday: Eat a healthy breakfast and lunch at work, with no snacking on sweets in between! Couldn't go to work. x.x Replacement goal: do yoga. (x) Saturday: Begin reducing caffeine and sugar. Don't go cold turkey!! Cold turkey does not work. Sunday: WEEK 2: Monday: Attend a workout at the Y. (x) Tuesday: Sort out my finances! Go through banking history and find out how much I'm spending on groceries. Wednesday: Bonus round! Two goals! ----( a ) Actually sort out my finances!! Right in the morning, with my cuppa decaf. 8) (x) ----( b ) ~Go to yoga at the YMCA at 7:00pm~ Thursday: Dial in the nutrition a bit. Aim for a healthier breakfast at work, have a salad when I get home, and figure out something healthy for dinner. (x) Friday: Saturday: Sunday: Go on a hike with the boyfriend! (x) WEEK 3: Monday: Today the focus is just to hit my other two major goals. Make good food choices, and when I notice that I am failing to pay attention to my food, pull my attention back towards what I'm eating. In the afternoon, do the 30 Day Shred level one before dinner. I love those workouts. (* u *) (wound up doing yoga for cramps instead owing to intensity of feminine curse. still a win in my books) (x) ----->Bonus goal: 10 minutes of meditation. (x) REST OF THE WEEK: NO GOALS OOPS LOL WEEK 4: Monday: Go to passport office - find out if I need new passport (since my old one got covered in laundry detergent. x_X;; At least it smells like a field of lavender). (x) Tuesday: Talk to the volunteer coordinator at the place I volunteer about how I will be leaving soon. (x) Wednesday: Since this is a day off, devote time to ~ART~! Also, get my sister to be my guarantor for a new passport. (x) Thursday: Don't take any baked goods home after work. Bread is okay... but don't eat any of it until the later in the day, when actually hungry! (x) Friday: Same as Thursday (x) Saturday: ..D: Sunday: Bike to see my sister at work and get my passport photo signed by her! x_x; (x) WEEK 5: Monday: GET PASSPORT PHOTO! And do prep work for upcoming mental health job. (x) Tuesday: Wednesday: More prep work for upcoming job. (x) Thursday: Eat healthily during work. Have my favourite tea biscuit with peanut butter for breakfast, then select whatever unprocessed option for lunch that I can find - a breakfast sandwich without bread, or maybe get the cook to leave a slice of gluten free pizza without cheese! If successful, I'll buy a chia seed kombucha as a reward. ;D Friday: Saturday: Re-record vocals for current track Sunday: WEEK 6 Monday: (x) Tuesday (x) Wednesday (x)

I have a lot of problems with anxiety. In fact, even as I write this, I want to run away. I'm afraid to face my real problems, and, often, I escape them by throwing myself into another problem. I think: "Oh, I have to lose weight," or, "Oh, I have to be an artist," or whatever. Then I rarely stick to any of the plans I make - or, if I do, I don't feel as if I've actually accomplished anything. I think that I know why now - because they're not the real problem I'm looking to solve. I used to spend most of my time "wearing masks." Whenever I faced the world, I would do it wearing a mask, or following a script, instead of relating authentically. Now I relate authentically - at least, whenever I can. And it's anxiety-provoking as hell. That's the focus of this challenge, then: to learn manage my anxiety as I start to relate to the world authentically. GOAL 1: Small goals. This challenge can be anything - whether it's related to fitness, food, drawing, music, general life stuff, whatever. But there's only one of them. By setting a low criterion for success, I will learn to celebrate my successes and build upon them. Write out one challenge per day, and if I succeed in this challenge, I can consider this day to be a success. GOAL 2: Yoga and exercise! Yoga calms my body and I love it... but I often find myself afraid to do it. Once the mind latches onto the "plan" to do yoga, it morphs it into an obligation, and reprimands me when I fail to meet it. Either go work out or do yoga each day by following a video. As much as the perfectionist in me hates this: even a ten-minute video will do. GOAL 3: Eat mindfully. I have a lot of neuroses around food. In fact, my pattern is quite disordered... and I want to fix that. I want to find the simple pleasure in food again. I want to savour it and enjoy it. I believe that, when we remove our social conditioning and pay attention to what we're eating, our bodies will tell us what we want. This is happening for me already - I've noticed that dairy makes me feel bad, and I seldom want things like ice cream anymore. But I still have a many issues - particularly guilt and self-loathing - around food. I will explore reducing my sugar and caffeine, noticing how foods make me feel, and what makes me reach for certain foods. So - each day, aim to eat mindfully. Notice the sensations of the food I am eating, and how it makes me feel. LIFE GOAL: Let's get artsy! I have always been an artistic person, but chronic mental health problems have made it difficult for me to express myself. Getting back to my artistic self is getting back to my roots, and the act of creation will help me feel confident in the world, instead of like a mere observer. Do one art-related thing a day. Doodling, practicing piano, whatever! Alright. I can do this.

Bell peppers! They're sweet and crunchy and you can eat 'em like apples.

Do you ever have days where you just don't even care, and you eat whatever you want? I do. In fact, I'm having one today. It's weird, though. I used to feel really guilty when this happened. I would have a day where I just didn't care anymore, and I'd eat a whole bunch... but then I'd be so angry at myself, and so guilty. And I think that just made my eating worse. But today, it's like... I don't even care, I'm going to eat whatever I want, and that's fine. And you know what? I'm actually eating less than on those days when I felt guilty about it! Because now I'm still listening to my body. Discuss: Do you ever have days where you don't care? How do you feel about it?

Um, reincarnation and neoplatonic emanation! Which I guess is like Buddhism? I'm just learning about Buddhism now, and it seems to fit pretty well. But it's like... there's the Oneness of Being, and that's the uniform everything-ness of... well, the entire universe. The Oneness is emanated into increasingly complex and material layers of being. "Nirvana" is to break free of a cycle of rebirth and return towards the Oneness. And although I believe in reincarnation, I don't think it's like, "Okay, cool, you're dead. Have another body!" I think it's more complex than that - that our constituent parts are redistributed. Kind of like how once a flower decomposes, its decomposed parts don't perfectly reassemble into another flower - rather, they're distributed in a similar area. Does that make sense? Oh, and I also believe the most major religions are allegories for the same truth, but that people get caught up in the more concrete aspects of them and mistake the metaphors for the actual body of faith. That is, it's more like they're fables with morals, and the morals are what's true - not the fable itself. So yeah! I've thought about this quite a bit. >.>

Welcome back! It's so cool that you've maintained your healthy habits so far. And congrats on not eating at Taco Bell! I know such things can be major triumphs!

I really like that! It sounds like becoming invested in the journey, not the destination. I find that's what trips me up a lot - instead of day by day, I get frustrated by my current position with reference to my goals. Thanks! You've given me something to think about. Have you found yourself feeling better since you shifted your this perspective?

Hi rossicar! Thanks for sharing your story. I'm also looking at going into counseling - I just finished my undergrad - and it sounds like we've got some things in common! I am no stranger to the fear that I am fat and the sense of despair that I'm not ever going to reach my goals. Congrats on getting the courage to join! It sounds like your choice to join Nerdfitness - which you say you've been vising a long time - is a great act of self-care in itself. But like Jenn said, I wonder where your desire to lose fat is coming from? Can you accept yourself if you don't meet your goals? I know that when we have goals that we want to attain, it can often be hard to give ourselves leeway with them. Anyways, in any case, welcome!

Hi! I've been a member of this forum for a while. I've even done a few challenges - and I've usually stuck to the goals I make for a couple of weeks. But eventually, I always fade out. I think maybe because I've never joined the community! I tend to get shy on forums, actually. Basically, my goal is that I want to lose fat, and I want to do it in a healthy way. Technically, I'm at a healthy weight, but I know that I can be carrying less of it. For me, though, "in a healthy way" means "without hating myself!" I'm a huge perfectionist, and time and time again it messes me up because I can't take it when I fail to meet my goals. In fact, I become so anxious I can't even work out - even though I like working out! So... yeah. Looking forward to spending more time here!

Food: Breakfast: 1 avocado, 10 walnuts, 1 yellow bell pepper Lunch: 1 tea biscuit with peanut butter, 1 slice sourdough bread with peanut butter Dinner: mini-meatballs in a lettuce wrap; 1/2 orange bell pepper; 1/4 tomato; alfalfa sprouts, plus some pieces of a leftover burger from last night (bits of patty, goat cheese, bun, onion, lettuce) Beverages: coffee with 1 tsp raw cocoa powder and a splash of almond milk; yerba mate tea Snacks: 4 carrots, 1 tbsp peanut butter, 3 raisins. Well, no refined sugar.. but a lot of food. @.@ Tomorrow: more vegetables. B, because I did stick to no refined sugar and ate veggies, but I ate more than 1 serving of bread. Exercise: None. :C Was feeling pretty bad cramps earlier in the day and was just like "meh, screw it" Psychological: bad day mental health-wise. Makes everything a lot harder. Balance: ..i watched like 100 episodes of degrassi

Thanks for commenting, Fonzico! Yeah, the push feels great! Although so does flipping off the computer screen whenever the trainer announces that the next exercise is any variation on a push-up. I really fell off the wagon (I did start buying more veggies and becoming patient with cravings, however)! I'm stoked to start again. In the first half of the challenge, I didn't want to go too specific because I wasn't sure what I wanted. Now I'm ready to make things more specific: 1. No refined sugar until my birthday - May 25th! This also includes honey, unless consumed to soothe my throat when singing. Exception: two 90% dark chocolate bar are allowed until that date. 2. No more than one bread product per day for the first week - so until May 14th. I'll re-evaluate at that point. 3. Circuit training a minimum of three times per week; yoga at least once. 4. Sign into Nerd Fitness every day and write it all down! 5. Write out a list of life priorities (tomorrow, during my break) and refer to it daily. wheeeee @_@