Guild Leader
  • Content Count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


About RisenPhoenix

  • Rank
    Wielder of Esperacchius
  • Birthday 11/19/1986


  • Location
    Medford, MA


  • Class

Recent Profile Visitors

4682 profile views
  1. Thanks all. The week wasn’t as rough as I was expecting in many ways. Still was weird though for me. I’ve been diving into work as bunch, which is good. Championing things I think are worth it, even though I may be crushed by the cause, as I’ve been warned might happen if I don’t carefully Ride the wave. But I’m trying to set myself up as a science brain in this place, not just a pair of hands. Which is an uphill battle given the lack of PhD and probably my habit to be loud these days. Would much rather quietly work in the corner, but alas. But also been organizing and getting things accomplished, so that’s a benefit. Not thrilled with the goals my boss has for me planned in 2020. So I need to counter with things that aren’t going to bore me to tears. Taught tonight and had three students. I was expecting only one because I’d the holiday. We did swore take away drills. Mostly they hadn’t seen the techniques, and I tried to tie the movement and control of the blade to our unarmed techniques. I think some of it got through. Maybe. Tomorrow I may do two classes. Maybe one if I’m tired. Then meeting A former intern to help him with some networking stuff. Then getting home before Boston gets snow. Nice plans just just puddle under blankets and work on a talk I’m giving this coming Thursday that I’ve been putting off. But I’m in one piece and that’s better than I was expecting to be. I’ll take it.
  2. Still Alive. With details behind the spoiler for those who don't want it. Also somehow I'm oddly important and central in a million things at work. Trying to get data out, presented, and gathered. It's tiring, which is kind of what I need right now I guess. Body is starting to hold up better again with physical activity, so I should be able to dive back into physical activities again a bit better. Trying to do a steady build rather than a dive right in so I don't re-injure myself. Calories have been solid, actually. Which is shocking. But probably related to getting some mental bandwidth back that I didn't realize was missing previously. Aiight. Onwards.
  3. Probably going to be scarce this week. Some life things happened. I’m fine, but need to decompress and will probably be hiding in work a bit as a result. Still aiming to keep to the challenge though, and will probably House in that, too. Tonight I got semi surprise guests so I ate provided meat and cheese plates with gusto and didn’t keep track of things. Ah well. If I can get myself back on track by the end if the month with my logging I’ll still consider it a win.
  4. Food yesterday ended up being.... not great. But much needed. I ended up taking a 4ish mile walk to a bookstore, and then got picked up by my friend and driven back to my house. We both had a couple Beers, and then since we were both hungry and my batch cooked food wouldn’t provide for the two of us we went to the Asian fusion recurrent that’s quite literally on my door step. Not low calorie (hello crab Rangoons), but I did get a vegetarian dish - Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce and a side of white rice. Definitely hit the spot while providing me some more veggies for the day. Plus it was nice to have some company for a couple hours to distract my brain. Today the food should really be better. Honest. Mostly have chores to do, including grocery shopping and batch cooking. Though I maybe aim for a crock pot meal to make my life easier. Just keep things running somewhat smoothly.
  5. Ended up with four students last night. I has planned on doing three techniques, but only got to two, because people really seemed to like the second technique and it was tricky. The hour went faster then I expected, too. Partially because I stretched a lot. Food ended up being really low, too. Only 1700 calories, and that included me eating not great stuff. Maybe it’ll semi counter my Thursday behavior. Should still average out to about net 2100/day this week as a total average. Not too shabby considering this is the first honest attempt at getting back on the horse. Next week’s challenge will be two company provided lunches to account for. Some fun, light reading done this morning over coffee. Needed something light to help with the brain weasels. Will need more later probably, too. Was debating going to train for two hours today, but I’m lazy and still somewhat anti people, so I’m skipping that first hour. Then who knows what the rest of my day looks like. It’s nice out so maybe a walk.
  6. It's been a long while since I've had a gif-laden challenge. Or a themed challenge. And everyone can always use more Avatar in their life. And the new year seems a good time to do that. In a way, the limited challenges have been my vague attempts at keeping myself moving forward in some way, while dealing with a whole lot of other crap. There's been a lot of upheaval, a lot of change, a lot of drama, and a whole bunch of RP sitting in the corner rocking back and forth with anxiety. I think a majority of these things are ultimately one-off things (shodan exams, company reorgs, house buying, dojo moves and fundraisers), but also they were a slew of things that I feel prevented me from actually focusing on myself and what I want, rather than being pulled along and put into a form of survival mode (Okay yes, the house thing is all on me, but damned if I underestimated how that process works). And so far in 2020, there are definitely things I'm looking at that aren't my most favorite thing to deal with that I'll have to do, but for the most part I want to take 2020 to refocus on my needs a bit. Within reason. 1) Teaching to Learn - Teach once a week, and train at least four hours After all of the drama that happened a few months ago, I am now covering a Friday night class at my dojo for the foreseeable future. (Cliffnotes version of previous drama: Asked to start covering morning classes and teaching. Then asked to cover a class and told I couldn't teach. When I asked why, got told 3 different reasons for why I couldn't teach and in every case was excluded from any form of communication. Then ignored. Now this.) So the large issue here is.... technically the Friday night class is a weapons class. I have been given permission to *not* have it be a weapons class if I so wish, but my dojo does so few weapons things that I would rather not. Honestly, it's a good chance for me to work on the relation our weapon work has to our unarmed techniques, and is a good study in physiology, using ones center, and extension. But it also means that I need to work on all of those things. So on top of trying to figure out the best ways to relay those things to other people, I really need to solidify things myself on that front. Entertainingly, I taught this same class last week as a last-minute favor. The only 'negative' comment I got from the yukyusha was that he "Did totally stab me" when I was trying to teach something. Hey, I'm learning, was my response. But I should work on not getting stabbed during class. 2) Count All the Calories - Track everything eaten, every day, even if it's a hassle My weight/body fat has spiked pretty high since the car accident/depression/forced shodan exam anxiety that defined Late 2018/Early 2019. I tried to do some things, but nothing really worked that great. I kept kind of waffling on what I allowed and what I didn't. Work has a million snacks, which made stress eating happen a lot more than I would allow over all. And for a while I was pretty much dependent on the food that was ordered on company dime to save money. But that meant I let myself get lax about my eating habits. Stress made me less likely to batch cook anything. And since moving I haven't exactly restocked my kitchen and freezer to have good, quick meals. So I need to start logging things again, and hopefully in a couple months I'll at least comfortably fit in the majority of my clothing again. I'm angling for about 2000 calories a day. No idea where my weight is at, and honestly if I step on a scale I'll get depressed. So I'm avoiding all forms of "pre" measurement here. Yea, not great for trending, but better for my mental health. 3) The Morning is Good - Wake up MWF at 0530. See how plausible it would be to leave the house at 0600 for a workout. So the holiday challenge I got somewhat comfortable with the pre-0600 wake up. I didn't make it to the 0530 time regularly because a lot happened and I needed to prioritize sleep and recovery and sanity over an arbitrary wake up time I set for myself that did not impact when I got to work. But trying to get to that point this time is the goal. I've got a tentative plan that I'll join the gym literally across the street from me early next year, but I want to make sure I'm up and somewhat human before I go drop that cash. I would love if it were a slightly fancier gym, but I can't complain since it's like $15 a month. But anyway, we can see how I fair doing early mornings. At least now I have a coffee pot that will start brewing coffee when I set it, so that's great. 4) All Reading is Good Reading - Read something every morning over coffee I have a goal in 2020 to read 30.... things. I tried to keep some tabs on what I read in 2019, but I lost count, and 30 seems like a good number. I'm leaving it as "things" because I'm totally going to count novellas and graphic novels in this count. Probably not run-of-the-mill comics though, unless its a compilation that covers an entire story arc. But I do want to tone down my morning reddit browsing that's jumped up in the last few months. For the most part I'm not exactly learning anything, and I rarely feel strong enough about my opinion that I consider it worth it to comment on things I do read. So at least I should try and at least read things I feel stronger about and will help me. First book I'll finish in 2020 is Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking. I'm about halfway through it right now. Nothing particularly earth shattering other than realizing a lot of my reactions make perfect sense, and why I've been feeling so drained at work lately (read: Having to extrovert for things a lot more because a lot is annoying me and not recovering well enough after the fact because crazy 2019). Morning reading should help with the pre-work charging, though. And thus begins my 2020 challenge. We'll see how good I am at maintaining it.