AddisonNemeth

hello fellow nerds its your friendly neighbourhood Deadpool with your daily dose of sarcasm and self loathing... actually im gonna be nice to myself for a change, or at least try to be nice. I have not given up yet. its been hard but I have been pushing and trying to make at least part of my meals healthy. the past 2 days were my weekend and I had a bit of interim fasting (or whatever its called. I legit cant be asked to even google how to properly spell that) which means I had no food till 2-3 pm on both days. and then I had protein porrige. which is a good thing, a good choice. yes there is ton of things I did wrong this last week. but 1 I am still here (aka posting even tho rarely) 2 I have not given up even tho normally at this point I already would have reverted to just eating all the bad things, all the time for the next 3 days to ''try again on monday'' and fail again. 3 every day I am trying to push for being healthier and eating better even if its just refusing one chocolate or one piece of pizza. and the truth is all of that is only due to the support y'all are giving me so thank you. A/D

yo yo yo lets bring it down to honesty a bit... its been a while since I posted for several reasons: - I am terrible at keeping myself motivated to post. - even tho I tried I dont think I did well enough this past week and that makes me feel like a failure and ashamed which means its easier to not post at all then post and say I fucked up. - I had a busy week at work but lets face it. that is just an excuse. Now Its hard for me to go into details but I had some take aways and other unhealthy food since my last post. but I also had healthy food like breakfasts consisting of porridge and protein shakes. my exercising is not going great but I try to take the stairs as much as I can. at this point idk what to do. idk if im making any progress or not as its too early to say and I am at a point at which normally I would give up. I don want to do it, I dont want to quit but its hard. we will see how it goes. this was depressing as fuck A/D

that post up there right above... I actually wrote it yesterday morning. just seems as tho I forgot to click post. I am so talented.

yo yo yo its your boy Deadpool (girl, whatever). yesterday was a good day. all I ate were 2 protein bars, glass of milk, some plain air popped popcorn and some ribs with sweet potato fries. today Im gonna try to also have good food but the fact of the matter is that holy shit I am craving ''real food'' and by real I mean the most processed and unhealthy. my body is screaming for sth I can sink my teeth in like a big steaming bowl of pasta or a blt sandwich... I dont even want to start on pizza. See this is the thing... I could care fucking less about chocolate and cookies but give me some chips and carbs and all thats savoury and I will sell my soul for them. anyone got any ideas on what I can have instead? in other news. thank you for all your support especially Scooby Chick and QuietRiotGrrrl, you guys have the best advice and I really appreciate it. A/D

its the weekend!!! well actually the weekend is ending but who gives a fuck. it was fun. today my family is here. and I mean my gf, my children and in laws. chocolate and coke is flowing and they are all ordering pizza. today I had good day eating so far and fruit instead of sweets and im not gonna fuck it up with pizza. I will have some curry tho. I realised a very weird truth the other day... what I eat is 100% in my power and control. like its my hand that puts it in my mouth. i'm not a baby nor a senile person and i feed myself. all I have to do is just eat stuff thats good for me and not anything else. This answer is so simple its almost painful. ok people so now that I decided to only eat the things I am suppose to eat. I need to do something about exercising. I do have dogs (to answer your question QuietRiotGrrrl) however they are puppies and in heat so I cant take them out for another 3 weeks. I walk to work every day tho and i can easily implement stairs instead of elevators rule. to make it more fun. pizza for my family just came. my food is not here yet. bitches be hungry and craving hot cheese but not gonna have any. If you seen the Deadpool movie I am now in the stage of Wade Wilson being treated to many dangerous tortures and poisons to trigger his mutation into Deadpool. I am going to now go through a long and painful period of my own tortures and mutations. having to exercise when I suck at it and everything hurts. having to eat vegetables when I could be eating pizza. but I have to do it. Just like Wade had to. to have a shot at being healthy and happy. but I need your help to do it. I have already tried starting with running (that didnt work) and starting with lifting weights (bit better but still a fail). Im rather if not very overweight and lots of exercises are challenging. I also have little time outside of work. but in the morning when I'm having my coffee and Jeremy Kyle, I could do some Yoga. that would be perfect in front of tv exercise. it would slowly get me used to moving, it would make my body prepared for further exercise later on. so any of you have any good (free) resources and tips on where to start then let me know. A/D

damn my entries here are getting boring as fuck. but then all the time I have to post is 15 mins in the morning as I'm having coffee so.. anyway, not sure how well y'all know Deadpool but he has voices in his head. A sensible one and a crazy one. well behold as it seems I have the same. and we are not talking here about my fathers voice telling me im a looser cause fuck that shit. im over that bastard. yesterday was particularly interesting when it comes to voices. from the very morning the voice of a hungry ''no consequences to what I put in my mouth'' deadpool was telling me to eat everything. sweet, savoury you name it. because in my head I was feeling guilty I almost didnt notice that till I got home I actually did it well. no processed carbs or candy. was really craving something sweet so I got myself a protein bar. and then the evening came... once again. and my voice of reason which kept me semi in check decided ''well I worked hard enough, time to go to sleep'' and then the crazy voice was like ''hell yeah! party!!! we are having pizza bitches'' and then pizza happened. but then ok riddle me this. I live with my girlfriend and 2 kids. they eat crap food quite often and i am here to see it. they are not willing to stop just so i dont have cravings which really is fair enough. not their fault im fat and cant control myself. but what can I do to make it easier? what can I do to not be falling with all the bad food around me? I will make a better more proper post over the weekend. AD

so this is one of the main problems I have. actually keeping myself accountable and motivated to post in here on regular basis and not abandon all my plans and goals. as I Have told you all about my short attention span so lets get down to bussiness. yes I have tried challanges, no they also not worked. nothing so far did. Scooby Chick that one hour thing makes sense. im gonna try it last week was rather pathetic and this week i started strong decent food, reasonable portions, protein rather than carbs. no cigarettes. and then the evening came about and i fell asleep on my couch. woke up hungry as fuck and before i knew it i consumed 2 tortillas with mustard and a chocholate plum thingy. but today im trying again and i will make it happen. i do appreciate all the support and please share all the ideas or tips you might have A/D

Ladies and gentleman, boys and girls and all other gender identities.. Welcome to the amazing world of the future telling, gods gift to earth which is Addison Wade Nemeth. As I have predicted yesterday morning. my food intake for the day was terrible. nothing to be proud of and the fact I had a very shitty day at work is not an excuse. my prediction for today? slightly better. I do want to cook something decent for dinner. something actually healthy. but I also know I might get more bad news at work which means emotional eating of crap food. What I need to do is find me some consistent food plan and food ideas that will be there for me no matter the mood. As the Captain America of this website says (Steve duh) ''you cant outrun your fork'' I say ''Cap, I might be impatient and voices in my head might not agree but you have proven to be a superhero worthy following and im gonna give it a shot.'' will update y'all with some ideas later. A/D

thank you for the comment Scooby Chick. I appreciate it more than you can imagine. and I will continue with my honesty so lets state some facts... fact - you said I got this and I dont believe that, due to my extreme lack of self confidence. My real life super power is actually possessing negative self confidence and self belief. like -1000 self confidence. I still believe in what my asshole father said that I will be a fat looser for the rest of my life. fact - my healthy eating went so damn well yesterday... I had ice cream and an entire pizza in one sitting. and I finished it off with some beer and a bottle of whisky fact - its 8 am im about to go to work, tired, hangover and I dont have much prospects for eating decent food today ether as my fridge consists of cheese. bread, condiments and alcohol. fact - my quitting smoking is also going splendid as fuck. instead of not having any cigarettes I bought a pack and smoked half of it by myself only last night. however... fact - i really do want to make this work. i really am sick of feeling like this and looking like this. but... fact - i dont know how to do this. I tried several times to go the way of ''small changes'' and ''one thing at a time'' and ''build your good habits'' and that was not something working for me at all. not that the system of it wasnt successful...i was not successful at following that system. I have too short of an attention span. I need to feel like im doing things and see results instantly. so im gonna eat my tost and go to work where i probably will end up buying some carb loaded lunch only to come home too exhausted to shop, or cook and order another take away which once again will make me feel like a sad fat looser. welcome to the magical wheel of doomed decisions that lead to more doomed decisions, and even lower self belief. any ideas on how to break that cycle are welcome. A/D ps told you this is gonna be fucking ugly...

Im in the middle of reading the deadpool article. I am a huge deadpool fan and have been for years.I have also recently been watching a lot of the amazing show Lie to me. And a thought struck me. it is time. time to show the whole messy truth in the most honest daily battle log to date. so here it is y'all. my last and final fight to loose weight and live a better life. this time im gonna make it god dammit! So this is me, going into this not as myself but the Deadpool version of me in all it's messy, brutally honest and inappropriate R rated glory. Im 26 years old. i have been fat since I can remember. my father and other family members were always commenting on my weight and telling me how i will never be anything else then a fat looser. I was always bullied at school because of my weight. at the age of 18 i reached my ideal weight -144 pounds. due to the fact that my father still called me a fat looser I believed him. decided that if im still not skinny enough i might as well eat something and be happy. and thats how i reached to be 220 pounds at my heaviest. i have been on diets and trying to loose weight for probably the last 13 years of my life? something about that. after my best shape 8 years ago i have been gaining and loosing weight (majority gaining) but my lightest in those 8 years was 194 pounds. right now as im writing this i am 203 pounds. i want to be 144 again pr at least 160. im so fed up with trying and failing. you know how many fucking threads and challenges i tried on this website? like 20 or sth. and im still fucking fat! this sucks. but this time will be different. cause y'all are gonna see all of it. every good bad and ugly moment of it. this is going to be radical honesty with Deadpool and you better hold onto your chimichangas, I am warning you now people, if you want a nice happy weightloss journey from an inspirational person you have come to the wrong place. this is just going to be the day to day struggles of an overly sarcastic and bitter fat girl. who is so desperate and so tired she will do anything to fucking succeed. so those of you who decide to wanna witness this and help hit me up. i will answer every question and take on board every comment. Peace A/D

here is the daily log thats the continuation of this re-spawning. http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/74159-the-island/ Lou1860000, thanks for your kind words and advice. I definitely need to figure out how to eat more veg. so this article sounds great, thanks. Addison

my weight loss is a game I cant seem to win at. every time I start a new mission it is going ok for few days, week or so even and then my progress stops, cravings get better of me, excuses creep back in and I die. then I am obviously angry with my defeat so I say. ok. just gonna have to start again. but the again isn't straight away. its usually days if not weeks of eating crap before I respawn. And here I am Respawned. today I have found myself on an island. very similar to the one from the show Arrow. but instead of lack of food there is plenty of it. only problem? its mostly poison. about 90% of all the food in this place is not edible at all. there is plenty to drink but barely any drinkable water. instead of lack of people there is loads of them. all eating and drinking their poison. looking at me. checking what will I do. this mission is one of stealth. people cant know that I have caught on to the fact that they are being poisoned. that I will rebel and go against the grain. so I need to do my training in secret until I am ready to become someone else, something else. so here are some stats. 25y, 5'6 female 93 kg goals? optimal body weight for someone who is ready to deal with life no matter what. and I mean most basic survival skills. running, crawling, climbing and being in a shape good enough to learn how to fight. will try to update and not die this time in this new adventure. Addison

I am officially leaving this challange. I have reevaluated my plans and approach. maybe soon I will write about it in Becoming Hannibal or new thread. good luck to you all Addison

Day 2 I forgot to clarify a few details... my weight as of yesterday is 94 kg I am looking to get to about 65kg so around 30 kg. my workout plan is body weight exercises mondays wednesdays and fridays, and cardio tuesdays, thursdays and saturdays. Now i know 6 times a week seems like a lot of exercising. but right now i just want to build habit of working out and get my body used to being active. which is why I am going easy on myself. my workouts are only 15 mins (30 if you count warm up and stretching) my strength routine is really simple. push ups, squats and planks. my cardio is 15 mins on jump rope. so far im feeling great but sore. but great Addison

First Day I am so excited. So here is a quick overview of my blueprint it is all about organizing my time well and being more active. spending less time on the couch and more focusing on what is important. so the Blueprint is just a general overview of my day and what I will do and when. since I am done with Uni, and not yet have a job I have a lot of time on my hands. so this is how my days will look like: wake up at 9 am till 11 am I need to have my lazy coffee, protein shake breakfast and workout. at 11 I start my 2 hours of cleaning. that includes anything from normal house chores to sorting through my books and any other jobs that need doing round house or garden. it must be productive and keep me on my feet and moving. at 1pm i have 2 hours to make and eat a nice clean lunch. 3pm to 5 pm is my time to pick kids up from school or if thats not something im doing that day I will take those 2 hours to better myself in some way. it might be learning how to play guitar, or skate, work on my cv etc. at 5pm I will start cooking dinner which i have time to make and eat till 7 pm from then on i have time to relax or work out more if i want. after kids re in bed f course. and thats how my days will look like for the next 6 weeks. Which reminds me... its 10 to 11 and I have to go finish my coffee before I start cleaning up. wish me luck Addison

I am an adventurer who was overweight for most o' me life. I need t' loose 30 kg. I be lookin' for a positive crew who will keep me on t' starboard course o' sail. loosin' weight, gainin' muscle and havin' fun

New challenge is approaching so i will be updating there until it ends and i come back in here. this is the link - http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49283-the-blueprint-addison-nemeth/ wish me luck Addison

Hi Lasss is thar a place for one more pirate on yerr fine Ship?

im really glad you will post mini challenges on Sundays before the week they are suppose to refer to. for people who live outside of US posting them on Monday usually meant not having them till Tuesday which was not ideal. So thanks for the change

I am really excited for this challenge. My long term goal is same as always. Loose weight. I want to get down to about 144 pounds but it is more about how I feel with the weight than actual number. my 3 goals for this challenge are as follow: 1 - eat 80-90% paleo 2 - exercise 5-6 times a week 3 - follow the ''better life blueprint'' All details will be posted within next couple of days. Addison

Thank you all for support, interest and advice. To answer some of your questions... Jack Harlekin - those pictures are stills from the show Hannibal. I believe the brown thing is the rabbit sausage (which in Hannibals case is most likely human sausage lol) But to truly answer your question I would advise to watch the show. It is really greatly made and each meal is described in detail. hblyne - I highly doubt i would be able to order salad as English take away places only offer it when it is drenched in 30 different kinds of mystery white ''salad cream'' and topped with 5 pounds of equally mystery ''kebab meat''. But your comment inspired me to take time and look through take away places available from my friends house. I also contacted my friend, explained my situation and ask her to help me find a place that would suit both of our ordering needs. after some searching we found a place in which i can order some soup, rice and chicken dish and a vegetable side. and my friend can have her pizza and chips and onion rings. now i just need to keep my iron will and not get convinced to change my mind about ordering healthy food. which might be a bit problematic since I wont be exactly sober but you all will be able to see what i ate on instagram (addisonnemeth) On the other news I am slowly attempting to create some sort of plan of progression for my next 6 week challenge. for the rest of this week and the duration of the next week I will keep focusing on my diet. I didnt want to make the same mistake I used to with suddenly jumping from eating million calories a day in carbs and sugar to eating 1000 calories a day in lean meat and vegetables only to feel sick from sudden lack of energy and give up. So until the 6 week challenge starts I will eat some rice or potatoes every day to make the transition a bit smother (has been working so far). With the 6 week challenge I plan to limit the consumption to only rice and only sporadically. I will also include exercise to my routine. Most likely i will start with some cardio and 3 simple progressive strength exercises - push ups, squats and planks. I still need to finalize the details. I do not wish to make the same mistake of moving too fast with my exercise - in the past I have been so excited to start I would try to jump head first into a fully developed plan of exercising almost every day both strength and cardio and before I knew it i would wear myself down to the point where I couldnt climb the stairs without serious pain. I am obviously very excited now as well which is why it is crucial for me to start slowly this time. as they say ''slow and steady wins the game''. if any of you have any ideas on how i should start or maybe a plan that one of you tried and which worked, or any advice at all please comment or pm me. Every bit of support helps. Addison.

So today is day 3. NO regrets so far. I did have ravioli yesterday which is not paleo enough for me but still i feel no guilt. I loved that ravioli and i wanted it. and today I had protein shake instead of breakfast to make up for the extra carbs. But I need your help guys. Next week im going over to my friends house. for a night of watching movies and partying. Usually we order pizza and bunch of sides. Obviously i would like to avoid that but i am not sure how. Any ideas? Addison

Well I was hoping the title would bring some interest I'm glad I was right. The funny thing about this show is that all the food looks so amazing and then you have to remind yourself ''in theory those are people. you should stop drooling now'' lol I mean check this out...

I am not super skilled when it comes to instagram and all that social networking stuff lol so i tried to put a link here and it didnt work. just go to explore and type in addisonnemeth and there I am. in a yellow transformers bumblebee mask lol. super hard to miss good luck M lol

Hi Guys I just started my Hannibal Adventure and the link is here. http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/48628-becoming-hannibal/ I hope i see some of you guys there Addison