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Everything posted by deftona

  1. Sunday Update I decided to be good yesterday, food wise. It was a good decision. I made us salt and pepper mushrooms (like fried mushrooms but you cook them in a couple of tablespoons of water, garlic and lots of salt and pepper and they sort of taste like they have been fried in bacon fat) with a little stilton and a poached egg. It was good. Dinner was roast chicken with garlic braised kale. carrots, sweetcorn and skin on boiled potatoes. I'm glad I am not eating like a trash person still but we have an Iceland order due today. For those outside of the UK, Iceland is mostly processed foods but they are the only company proactively offering delivery slots to the shielded and given my dad is on that list, it's the only way I can still eat without having to leave the house to get groceries. We've been trying for weeks to get a delivery from any of the other supermarkets with no joy, but we do have an Asda delivery coming next Sunday (which we had to book about a month in advance). I'm going to forgive myself for all the stuff that doesn't actually matter during this difficult time and I think everyone else should too. I spent the rest of the day playing Assassin's Creed sitting next to TH who was playing Football Manager. We were taking frequent Twitter breaks because the world is on fire. I have never used Twitter much before but recently I can't get off it. The world feels like it's changing. I think it's desperately needed. BLM protests have started happening here. And our government have suddenly decided they don't care about science and they are opening up again despite the fact we have extremely high levels of transmission in the community and are getting more deaths per day than the whole European Union combined. It feels a bit like retaliation. I think we all need to make our own decisions in this, based on our own estimations of our safety. Government advice isn't cutting it.
  2. So people are just bored of social distancing now? Also I think it would be a long time before I trust a buffet again. I'd be the one standing there with a stabby fork shouting IF ANYONE BREATHES ON MY PRAWNS IMMA GET YOU.
  3. I used to think this but as I have aged, a slight preference for Blur has emerged, like my sudden excitement for the Betterware catalogue and love of Pointless. Also yass, Gorilllaz!
  4. That's why I liked it, people seeing my upper arms and decolletage is so passe. You're allowed any attitude you like at this garden party! And we did still need the pest control because we were still seeing a lot of them, they just might not have been on our property. Imagine a world without Oasis and Blur! Had I picked Oasis, which I haven't, this would have been my song.
  5. Today's garden party outfit Today's theme - Oasis OR Blur. You're not allowed both, you have to pick a side.
  6. Exactly. I am trying to not be too hard on myself here because it's little wonder I am struggling to motivate myself. The world is on fire.
  7. I'm really glad to see an update from you. I'm following it on Twitter and the news and I'm very concerned about you. Stay safe x
  8. Saturday Update I woke up completely starving yesterday morning, to the point where I was downstairs making a slice of cheese on toast before I even had my coffee. To put that into perspective, I cannot remember ever eating anything at all until I have had two cups of coffee in my entire adult life. That cheese on toast was phenomenal. We decided to drain our pond yesterday because the evening before we saw some weird tadpole things in the water that weren't tadpoles. We think they were drone fly larvae because they had that weird rat tail thing they have, but we've been meaning to clean out the pond for ages because it is truly disgusting in there. The pump isn't connected because the lady we bought the house from rudely took the lion statuette the water fountained down out of and it's under a canopy of trees so leaves fall into there and start rotting in the stagnant water. Since we're not convinced getting the fountain sorted would solve all the problems this pond presents to us, we decided to just drain it, clean it out and board it over. It's raised above the ground about three feet and it goes down to the floor, so after we'd used a pump we'd borrowed off my dad to get as much water out as possible we had to bend over and pull out the old leaves and drain the rest of the water with pots. The water was black. It was grim. I also pulled my back leaning into it, but a bit of sleep has sorted that out. We had no room in our garden waste bin so we bagged up the gross leaves and took it to my parents to put it in their bin and I took them their takeaway too. My dad had given us some wooden planks to cover the pond up and we thought on the way there what we could do with that space and we decided to cover it with fake grass, get some artificial plants and make a shrine to someone (we later decided it would be Andre the Giant) and the plan was to come back home and order that stuff so we could finish it off but I don't know if you remember my parents are magic for this sort of thing but they always have everything I need, just like in Needful Things. I remember when we first bought this house and we needed a bar stool type chair for the breakfast bar in the kitchen and I needed a chair for my dressing room to sit on when I did my make up and not only did they have a perfectly sized bar stool chair, but my mom gave me a choice of two different chairs for my dressing room. Well, yesterday was no different. My mom asked me what I was going to do with the pond and I told her about the fake grass idea and she said - you can have that bit there if it fits and pointed to this bit she had underneath her garden table I had never before noticed wasn't real grass. So I measured it and it was exactly the right size, TO THE CENTIMETRE. I queried if I needed anything to put underneath the stop the water going down, and she pulled out a piece of vinyl that I thought was too small so she gave me two pieces to patch up (when I got home it turned out this was exactly the right size too) and some fake plants. She also gave me two tomato plants. I don't know how my parents do this, it's magic. I told them I am going to check with them first before I buy anything ever again to see if they have it and they said that's what their neighbours do. And they're right about that - just in the time I was there one of their neighbours asked my dad if he had a paving stone cutter (he did) and another if he had a tree lopper (he also did). Magic. The only thing they didn't have, and this is arguably the most important thing but I won't dwell on it, was a waterproof framed picture of Andre the Giant but I think that was a big ask and I can sort that out myself anyway. We got home and finished the pond, then we went for a ride around the private road at the back of the house on TH's bike. It's a bit big for me and I almost fell off a couple of times. We then sat in the sunshine for a while. I made us hotdogs for dinner and we went back out to lay around in the sunshine after. I don't feel at my best right now. I am gaining weight but I can't be arsed to care and I am currently just letting the fatness take me. I'm not prepared right now to do all the things to stop this happening so I will just have to accept it until I can be bothered again.
  9. It's one of those song titles you can hear just by reading the name of it isn't it? It is a great song.
  10. Today's garden party outfit Yes I turned up to my party dressed like Marie Antoinette and if you want to fight about it you'll have to wait for me to take it off because it doesn't look like I'd be able to roundhouse kick in it so give me a minute. Today's theme: Michael Jackson
  11. Friday Update I was still feeling a little salty with TH so I decided to take some stuff to my mom's to get out of the house. My dad washed my car when I was there. There were lots of jokes because I have never washed or had my card washed in the whole time I have had it. "Oooh Deffy look! It has a metallic finish! I always thought it was matte!". My mom can mind her business. To be fair, given it has been years and years since the car has been washed it doesn't look too bad, but I wouldn't give a fuck even if it did. I will never wash it again so everybody had better not get used to this. I got back and TH had had a meeting with his manager about the thing he was so pissed off about that caused him to be a sphincter in the first place so he was in a marginally better mood. I put on Assassin's Creed and played that all afternoon, then cooked my parent's takeaway and make a honey cajun chicken and mango salad for us. We had a few drinks in the garden then watched some mindless TV before turning in for an early night which turned into quite a late one.
  12. I have been sweet throughout. TH has been a little bit of a sphincter again this morning but then I would think that I know you do! Erasure music videos are a genre all on their own. I remember my mom has Erasure Pop! On VHS and they were all fantastic. Especially this one that I can't remember what it's the video to but it was about an army of little cupid angels with a bigger cupid gangmaster. Amazing. Haha, amazing! That has major Leonard Cohen vibes and now I am confused.
  13. Today's garden party outfit I'll try not to buy this one Although it is lovely. Today's theme: ABBA
  14. I'm so sorry Sloth. I can't imagine how horrible it must be to see your neighbourhood being destroyed by people who have no emotional connection to it. It's all so awful.
  15. Ok, this garden party is terrible for my bank balance because this is the third new dress I bought this week
  16. Thursday Update I woke up not really feeling arsed about anything so I just played Assassin's Creed all day. It was brilliant. No regrets. Might do the same today. When TH finished work we had a beer in the garden and that beer changed into a couple so the chicken salad we'd planned got switched out for a pizza we had in the freezer but we'll have the chicken tonight instead so it's just a l'il switcheroo. We chatted in the garden for ages but it appears I said something wrong and he got pissed at me so I put the Xbox on again and rage played Assassin's Creed, taking out all my frustrations on the local bandits. I'm going to do exactly the same today.
  17. My favourite love song This is such a lovely song. I'm not usually one for soppy love songs. I much prefer songs about sex or obsession because normal love isn't that interesting to me but this is just gorgeous. It's about life changing so much but one day looking at the person and remembering why you fell in love in the first place.
  18. I am living for this gender swap photo.