Polaris

I'm not good with alliteration, okay? So uni's gonna start again in a couple of weeks, but so will my first bulk ever (after a 4-month cut that almost destroyed my sanity). Until now I've been doing pretty much the same workout every time, but it takes quite a bit of time, so in order to also have time to hit the books and tatami like they owe me money, I thought I'd split it up a bit. And because I like to tinker with everything, rather than taking an existing program, I snagged some things from programs I liked - separate power and hypertrophy days from PHUL, AMRAP progress technique from Greyskull - and combined them. I'm still a baby in the lifting circles, with about 8 months of experience, so I'm asking you wiser nerds to take a look and tell me if my plan's any good. Goals: Strenght & power. Hypertrophy. Focus on glutes & shoulders (& arms too), because my cut diminished the former, and the latter has never had any muscle. Retain small waist & hourglass figure. Strenght 1 OHP 2x5 + 1xAMRAP Back squat 2x5 + 1xAMRAP DB row 2x5 + 1xAMRAP Barbell hip thrust 3x8 Triceps extension 3x8 Cable rope rear-delt row 3x8 Strenght 2 Bench press 2x5 + 1xAMRAP Back squat 2x5 + 1xAMRAP Deadlift 1x5 Assisted Pull-up 2x5 + 1xAMRAP Bicep curl 3x8 DB raise 3x8 Calf press/raise 3x8 Hypertrophy Back squat 3x10-12 Bench press 3x10-12 Biceps/triceps 3x10-12 Lat pulldown/DB row 3x10-12 Cable kickback 3x10-12 DB raise/Cable delt row 3x10-12 Calf raise/press 3x10-12 + planks or other core stuff 2 times/week, & accessory work on wherever joints feel iffy Questions I have: - Are 3 sessions per week and one hypertrophy day enough? PHUL and a lot of other programs have 4 days and two hypertrophy sessions, but frankly I don't think I'll have time or energy to hit the gym four days per week. - Or is it too early in my career for hypertrophy? I really want to visibly grow some muscle because I still look "skinny fat", but is there some kind of a milestone you need to reach before you can do that? - Do I need more glute work (I was gonna write 'butt stuff' until I realized ), on the hypertrophy day or otherwise? - Is it bad to squat on every session? - Good core exercises to strengthen the inner "corset" without making the waist bigger?

Ooh, good luck on the cut! 7 kilos in 6 weeks is tough, but if anyone can do it, it's you. If you need someone to vent to when you're hangry and fed up with everything, I'm here

Oh my dog, I weighed 59.9 kg this morning!!! I can't remember the last time my weight started with a five... early high school, almost ten years ago, maybe? I still don't know what made it start dropping again, but I don't care, I'm so ecstatic about this. I can't see where I've lost the seven kilos from, though. I mean, I can tell I've slimmed down a bit, but I imagine a seven-kilo-difference would be more drastic. I'm still not thin, I wouldn't even describe myself as lean (someone else might), and my friends keep assuring me I didn't look fat when I weighed 67 so... I don't know. Maybe I just can't see it. Only 900 grams to go, and then I can eat ALL THE THINGS. Or at least, find my maintenance and then start my first bulk evah.

I don't normally feel bad for throwing away stuff I don't need. And the drawings I decided to keep take very little space. The only reason I sometimes consider throwing them away is because of every time I look at them, I remember all the dreams, all the worlds and people and stories that practically died back then, because the only person who knew them as intimately as me is gone. It may sound stupid to some, but as an artist, my creations are immeasurably important to me, and one of the few things that always managed to bring me happiness. I feel the same way when I look at photographs of my deceased dog. And I can't throw them away, because... well, every time I look at them, I remember.[/angst] In case you wanted to know. In less melodramatic news - woohoo, I vacuumed my floor! This is a big deal because I haven't vacuumed in months. Largely because my floor was so covered in stuff it was impossible. Well, what remains of that stuff is now piled on top of my bed, so I'm gonna have to do something about that if I want to sleep tonight. It smells fresher now, it's lovely. I need to keep my place neater in the future, it's like my mind feels less cluttered now too.

Nah, I've been lethargic and low on energy ever since I can remember, regardless of diet, exercise, sleep, vitamin supplements or anything. Doctors used to blame it on depression, but after I got it under control, my energy level still didn't improve. They took blood tests over a year ago and I was told everything's fine, but I don't believe it. My BF% is not that low, it's only around 25%. (My weight tracking app says I'm at 27%, but it only knows my height and weight, and by visual comparison I'd say 25% is closer to the truth.)

Aaah, it was a mistake coming to catch up with your thread when I've been on a crazy calorie deficit for three days Cheese sauce *Homer Simpson drooling* Since I've never done American style pancakes but should learn to - when you pour the batter on the pan, will it stay nice and round and separate like that, or do you need a magic trick for that? Btw, what's Netherlands native pancake like? Because it seems to be different for every country. (Here we pour the batter on a tray and bake it, then eat it with strawberry jam and whipped cream.) Also, congrats on the 70's!

I'm glad I'm not the only one who identifies with that comic on a spiritual level. (Is there an age where you Officially Become an Adult and all that stuff becomes easy? Because when I was a kid, I thought it magically happens when you turn eighteen and, well, I'm way past that now and still nothing.)

Week 3 update (for real this time. I started panicking and then realized I'd skipped number 2 entirely.) #1: This morning I weighed 60.2 kg. Insert a very hesitant 'yay', because that's the only time this week I've gotten below 60.6. But I've been taking green tea capsules and staying around 1000-1200 calories for the past few days, so maybe that's helped. I have now roughly divided my week to this kind of very low cal days, normal deficit days and one refeed day, because it seems like my metabolism responds better to the variance. I looked at my food logs and progress though and I gotta say, something shifty is going on there. I need to call uni healthcare and demand they retake the blood tests for hypothyroidism, because I have so many strange symptoms that it would explain. (Difficulty losing weight, constant lethargy and weariness, concentration issues... which I'm blaming on either hypothyroidism or ADHD.) Anyhow, my body dysmorphia has improved; I can now look at myself in the mirror and note that yep, I have definitely slimmed down. I mean, I'm still not satisfied with the way I look because I'm a perfectionist, but I'd be confident to strut my stuff in a bikini on the beach... if we actually got a couple of warm days here. #2: 3x6x22.5 kg bench last workout, after the disastrous first workout of the week where I decided to up the weight to 25 for my second set. Managed three reps, couldn't get the bar back up, cue the ten dudes around me asking if I need help. *facepalm* Thank dog for safety bars. I'm a little worried if I'll reach my goal in time, but it's still possible. I remember to recruit my whole body for the lift almost every rep now, though, so that's progress. #3: I... can't even remember? Like honestly I have no recollection of how I slept this week. I think it wasn't enough, but I can't be sure. I need to start writing this down. Life Goal: I kicked ass this weekend and filled all my weekly PVP slots by decluttering this mess. I still have stuff scattered across the floor, but I'll finish up tomorrow and then I can vacuum. I discovered I have a lot of space left in my wardrobe closet once I folded everything neatly, organized different clothes to their own piles and took out everything that needs to be tossed/donated/sold. I have a ridiculous amount of shoes, though. Like, half of my remaining floor clutter is shoes. And I don't even have that many shoes I use, I need to sell or otherwise get rid off about half of them. I wish I had a fitness bracelet, because I'm curious of how many calories I burned cleaning up that mess. No measurements this week because they're practically identical to last week's numbers. I do think my butt has become flatter, but I'm told my glutes should grow pretty well and rectify that once I can go off this cut. Curiously, my hip measurement hasn't got any smaller, but there is a bone (the big thigh bone?) right where I'm measuring, so I can't see how that could get a lot smaller. I have naturally wide hips, like, even if I were just a skeleton. I think I would have the highly coveted thigh gap if I lost enough weight. (Which, btw, is entirely dependent on bone structure. It's only achievable if you have wide enough hips.)

I'm on a break from decluttering and ye gods, why do I have so much stuff?! It seems impossible to get this all organized and out of the way somewhere. Or at least there's the impression of a ridiculous amount of stuff because I scattered everything across the floor to do inventory and put them away properly. I even emptied my closet and re-filled the shelves with a new system (I'm gonna label the shelves so I won't just randomly throw stuff in there. Gets hard to find anything especially since 80% of my clothes are black.) I changed my mind about the pallet bed frame, but I do want to revamp my sleeping arrangements some. So the current plan is to get some chipboard and paint it so I get a headboard, find one of those bed sheets that reach the floor (is there a word for this in English?), get some boxes to hide stuff under the bed, and maybe put a canopy over the bed. So that'll be the main boss. My mini bosses will likely be 1) getting a magnet board and put it on the wall next to my desk, so I can put notes and unpaid bills etc. there, since I'm so ADHD I tend to forget about everything. 2) sewing some of the small stuff I've needed to sew for ages, like fixing holes and taking in some seams. I was gonna start now, but can't find my needle anywhere. Typical. //Edit: I put my hardhat on and went through most, if not all, old drawings and other papers from the time before I lost everything, sorting them to two piles off Toss and Keep. Now I feel like I've been stabbed in the chest, but at least it's done. Sometimes I wonder if I should throw it all away, but I don't have the heart to. Besides, most of those drawings are really good. Except I had this phase when I used to draw really long necks, no idea what was up with that.

I've been curious about implants, but never went that route because I was worried it might break if someone punched my arm hard enough, since I do martial arts, or during very intense lifting. You ladies who have one, are my worries just silly?

This. Being a very proud person, when I make a mistake or embarrass myself, I often joke about it so others can't. There's no point for them to call me a loser if I've already been all, "haha I'm such a loser". I often joke about very serious matters because I have a dark sense of humor and, yes, it helps to deal with them. I joke about depression, suicide, eating disorders, even my own history of abuse - though, of course mostly in the company of my friends who're familiar with me and my sense of humor. I also aggressively flirt with some of my friends, and everyone's aware it's a joke. Sometimes my humor slips out around people outside of my gang and yeah.. the results are not always good. Social situations can be a little hard for me sometimes. Then again, sometimes I also joke about wanting to die because I actually want to die but don't want my friends to worry, even though I really do want someone to worry but don't want to be a bother, you know? "Hahaha I want to kill myself (not really (yes really))." And I joke about trans stuff in the presence of my trans friend, even though I'm cis-ish. I still watch what I say because of course I don't want to be offensive, and I've told all my friends to tell me if I cross a line. Fortunately my friends find me funny rather than offensive about 99% of the time

I'm still skeptical of the science behind the people that can eat a crapton of food and stay thin, but as I can't hire PIs to shadow them and log all their food and activity, I'll take your word for it. Mostly I'm just so envious because they don't have to pay any particular attention to their eating and exercise habits, while I need to track every damn thing and work hard to achieve anything. It's not fair. Too bad I hate smoking so much if I could burn a few hundres calories per day by it Yeah, I'll only do them only once a week in the future. I didn't enjoy feeling so stuffed, but I felt kinda better the next day, and it seemed like it kicked up my slogging metabolism. I know the extra calories should consist mostly of carbs, that's why I need a packet of white bread. It also helps me keep off binges, because it reminds me that being full of food doesn't feel that awesome in reality. I can get by pretty well with 1000 cal/day, really, if I don't work out or do anything special that day. It's breakfast, lunch/dinner and late night snack without any additional snacks for me, basically. I'm not worried about not having energy because I always have little energy, regardless of what I eat, do, or how much I sleep. (Which is a huge problem for me, especially since I'm gonna need more energy than I have soon and I don't know how to get it. Illegal stimulants? [Just kidding. Unless I become desperate enough.]) I already take a multivitamin with iron because I probably had some kind of deficiency. I think I could have a few of those very low-cal days a week, one high-carb refeed day, and keep my normal 1400-ish calories for the rest of the days. But 1.5g protein per lbs of bodyweight seems really high, that's about 200g for me. What would I even eat to get that much protein without going over the calorie limit? Thanks for the TDEE equation. I'm gonna need to try to find my TDEE once I reach my goal weight, at the latest. I'm just not sure how accurate it would be now, considering the several weeks long plateau. God, I'm so tired of this. I just want to get those last two kilos off so I can stop dieting. The plateau is driving me crazier than the calorie deficit, I think.

I'll try that, I'll start OHPs with the bar and then grab some dumbbells. I might have to start doing that with bench press too if I can't progress to a heavier weight soon - I have done 3x5x22.5kg, but last time I upped the weight to 25 for my second set. Managed three reps, couldn't get the bar back up and had to squirm below where it rested on the safety bars. Cue all the dudes around me asking if I need help. *headdesk* I feel like I'm so behind in my upper body lifts, because I can soon squat my bodyweight in my regular sets, and have been able to DL it for a couple months, but I'm still struggling with barely the bar with these two.

Yeah, don't base your opinion of hummus on the dining hall version. Go to some small restaurant owned by people from a country where they eat hummus regularly and give that a try. It's worlds apart. I've cooked hummus myself, it wasn't as good but it was okay - but ye gods, the process. Chickpeas are one of the most horrid-smelling thing I have ever encountered, and tahini just looks absolutely gross. Somehow they form a delicious thing when mashed and mixed together, but I don't think I can deal with them separately ever again. My favorite way to eat hummus is with falafel and fries. You can probably omit the fries though

Hmn. I do know a number of people (most of them women, even) who regularly eat, say, two packets of extremely sugary cookies in one day, exercise a lot less than me, and they're still thinner than me. It's not like they eat significantly less "normal" food, either - if anything, I see them eating microwave meals when I eat steak or salmon and salad. It's really hard to believe there aren't people who can eat everything and not gain weight when witnessing that. Also, I did a lot of googling, and found out that 3500 calories = 1 lbs fat has been debunked, and that it was a simplification to begin with. This article has an explanation and some calculations about that. And assuming the subject's own input is correct, as in, lower TDEE has been accounted for, calories in are overestimated and calories out underestimated to be sure (like I do) - how do you know about your insulin sensitivity, hormone levels, cortisol etc.? Seems like there's a huge margin of error there. I have no doubt those guys are ripped because they know what they're doing but they're also, you know, guys - they have testosterone and stuff to help them shed fat and gain muscle, so it's easier to them. I'd like more information geared to women from other women, because they're in the same/similar boat. Unfortunately the strength training side of fitness is still male-dominated, and all fitness-enthusiast women I know IRL (and a lot of them on the internet too) have either always been thin, or have become thin long ago, so they don't have much advice to offer, y'now. (Yes, at 22.5 BMI I am the fat chick ) Anyhow - is that 2-week near-maintenance period required before going from a cut to bulk? Is it because if you jump straight to bulking, your body's gonna store ALL THE FAT because it's been on a deficit before, so it thinks you're a starving caveman? Also, where does that number for 150g carbs come from? On the topic that made me originally start this thread, I had my first calorie-heavy day on Friday, which meant I had to eat almost an entire bag of bread to get all those carbs and calories. That sh*t was hard, man. Because most of those carbs need to be consumed after working out and I work out in the evening, I had to stuff my face over a relatively short period of time and I felt so full. But I weighed 60.6 kg again on Sunday morning, yay! I had another calorie-heavy day yesterday (Monday), not sure if it was too soon. This morning I was 61.something again, but I hope it'll drop back to 60 once my body, err, rids itself of all that food. I'm wondering now, am I shooting myself in the foot by doing this twice a week? Is it gonna hinder my weight loss, would I be better off just with one calorie-heavy day a week? By the way, is there a minimum amount of calories you need per day to not lose muscle mass? Because I was thinking, I can fairly easily get by with just around 1000 calories on non-training days, so, could I do that to speed up the rest of my cut? Or will it have some kind of adverse effects?

Of course, but I wasn't trying to hook up or actually flirt, I just made a joke that didn't translate across text. I thought it was clearer than it was because, I mean, who would even try to flirt in a public forum thread? (I'm fine now. Social anxiety and trauma issues make me react really strongly to stuff like this. [i'd also like to say that although Twilight was justified to tell me I was inappropriate, it could have been done less harshly, because even if I had been serious, I feel it's not right to treat a fellow queer lady (making assumptions here) like some predatory cishet dude.]) You're not. I have a trans guy friend who's said all he really wants from T is to get a lower voice, because he likes to sing I wrote in another thread what a pity it is that we can't just pick and choose what effect we want from hormones. Because while I have no desire to appear more dudely, I would welcome a testosterone boost for muscle development and fat decrease. (And, well, to stop periods but my BC pill already handles that.)

Seconded. Here I was just planning to start measuring all my big lifts in terms of 'percentage of Spezzy's PR'

I'm currently doing 3x5 lat pulldowns, sometimes with the V-bar and sometimes the normal one, and one-arm dumbbell rows. Sometimes I also hang from the pull-up bar to improve my grip strength. I used to do inverted rows, but didn't really seem to improve in them, and my current gym doesn't have a Smith machine that I used to do them with (the only use I ever had for the Smith machine ) I decided to try front squats on Friday when I was still on that crazy PWO, and oh my dog. I couldn't comprehend the hand/bar position at all. I read how-tos and watched videos on how you're supposed to hold the bar, but everything seemed so awkward and my arms were bent really weirdly, even though I don't (to my knowledge?) have arm mobility issues. I'll probably have to get someone to teach me, and continue back squats until that. Not that front squats are a huge priority to me atm, since my ambitions are more power- than Olympic weightlifting-oriented, but it'd still be nice to, you know, be able to do them. Does your heart rate matter if you were otherwise not getting especially fatigued? I mean, your heart will adapt or get the f out. Hopefully not the latter (Want me to send you some of my crazy PWO in an envelope?) You make those kettlebell snatches look so easy. I'm sure they're not, but you look like you're just chillin' and swingin' some KBs, all chill

Binges and off-days happen. I know it's easy to beat yourself up over them, but I always say, it doesn't matter what you do 10% of the time, the 90% is what matters. And it's important to remember that bad feelings will pass regardless of how horrible they are. I've considered getting tattoo on my inner arm that says "pain is temporary" so I won't forget.

Yeah, I don't care if it's placebo or not as long as there's an effect Especially since at this point I'd be ready to do weird witch rituals naked under moonlight if it helped my get to my goal already. I know right? I don't even know if it's normal or not because I have nothing to compare to, but it doesn't even contain anything unusual as far as PWOs go. I wish I could start a study where I'd give that PWO to people with ADHD and people with normal brains and see if there's a difference between their experiences. (Note: I don't have an official diagnosis yet because my shrink didn't really believe me the last time, but next time I see her, I'm gonna slam a bunch of symptom lists in front of her with everything I experience underlined.) Thank you, I love it too

Whoops, didn't notice the new reply. But you're right, Leimanu, upper body gainz are slooow, at least on some of us ladyfolk. Oh what I wouldn't give for a testosterone boost that would only help me grow muscle and reduce fat, without all the excess body hair and stuff... I also aim for a few more reps in bench and OHP, or likely will when it comes to adding weight again, because the 2.5kg increase is a lot. 22.5 may go up easily, but 25 might be "oh my dog why is this so heavy help me". Just to update, I've made some progress. I'm slowly getting the handle of using my whole body when benching, and can even OHP with the bar. The only problem is, I can't seem to increase my OHP reps beyond three. I did 3x3 this one time, and 2x3 + 1x3 + 1x2 the other, but I cannot. Get. That. Fourth. Rep. I also feel it in my middle/lower back region and nowhere near my shoulders. Am I doing something wrong, or...?

Godfather, thanks for the info! Understandably my knowledge of WTF is based on Google-fu and what I've heard from a few people. And like I said, there a wide difference in focus between schools. In my town, there's basically two ITF schools, and the one I'm not attending seems crazy about sparring and care less about anything else, at least based on my interactions with them on competitions. They're also a lot more formal and strict compared to my school, where we can joke around with the black belts and don't have to stand up and bow before asking questions, but that doesn't mean we don't have mad respect for our instructors. I would never go to that other school, not because they're worse but they just wouldn't be a good fit for me. One more thing, based partially on personal experience: TKD has a lot of kicks and jump kicks, so it's pretty tough on knees. And human knees are kinda badly designed, and can't seem to be able to handle everything they should. If you find you have knee problems, pain or they just feel wobbly, I have a solution for you: barbell squats. I have hypermobile and somewhat wonky joints and used to get all sorts of knee pain when I started, but squats cured them. They don't make you injury-proof, but they get rid of the random aches and pains.

There's so much conflicting information it's confusing the heck outta me. I don't mean you, Ilham and Disil, but the internet in general. Some sources say you should reverse diet after reaching your goal weight in order to avoid fat gain, others say you can jump straight to maintenance calories. Some say low-carb is the way to go when dieting, others swear by high-carb low-fat. Some people say losing weight/fat is as simple as calories in < calories out, while others say the quality of the food you're eating matters more. (It doesn't help that 1. the majority of the proponents of simple CICO seem to be big ripped dudes, which I am very much not, so there's bound to be differences in metabolism, hormones etc. that effect fat/muscle loss/gain. 2. according to CICO, I should've lost several kilos more during the past three and a half months than I have.) I'm the kind of person that likes math* because you have formulas that count the outcome, and your calculations are either right or wrong. But there is no consensus about this stuff, all sides have convincing arguments and studies and personal experiences, and I just don't know what to believe. And I don't want to use myself as a guinea pig because I'm afraid of gaining the fat back and screwing up my poor metabolism even more if I bet on the wrong method. So confused (* I know higher level math is a lot more complex)

Week 3 update: #1: The scale showed 60.6 kg this morning, and I'm just praying please please please let it keep going down. I've started taking green tea capsules and did my first calorie-heavy day of calorie/carb cycling on Friday. I have no scientific evidence whether they had an effect or not, but I'm going to keep doing them. I'm eager to reach my target weight, but I'm also scared of starting to eat maintenance when I get there, because there's so much conflicting information, and I'm terrified of putting the fat back on. Speaking of fat, I bought nigh-booty shorts one day in order to tell my ED "screw you, I'm hawt". #2: 3x5x22.5kg last workout, halfway there! I'm starting to get the hang of how bench press is supposed to be done as a full-body lift because I found this really ridiculous trick: I need to tense my glutes to engage my lower body. It's a good thing no-one can read my mind when I'm benching, because I'm now reminding myself "keep your butt tight". #3: Not so good. I had earlier shifts this week, so I either didn't fall asleep in time, underestimated how long it takes to do all pre-sleep stuff, or napped during the day and then couldn't sleep at night. I'm just plain not a morning person, a schedule that forces me to go to sleep before midnight just doesn't work for me. Other observations: That pre-workout, wow. I've never taken a PWO besides a caffeine tablet and some chocolate, and on Friday I took Star Nutrition's Intensity, one scoop pre-workout and half a scoop during. Notably, by 'taking' I mean, I ate it with a spoon and then frantically gulped water because that stuff is sour. It's easier (and more fun) than mixing it with water like you're supposed to. Anyway, at first I didn't notice a difference to my usual caffeine boost, but towards the end of my workout I realized how energetic I still was. Like the heavy lifts hadn't tired me out at all. And I still had some energy left after I was finished, so I found an empty tatami and practiced my newest TKD form and some side kicks. Still wasn't tired when I got home, and it was so weird because I'm used to being tired all the time, every day, regardless of what I do. But the most amazing thing was the focus it gave me. Like, I could concentrate on what I was doing, my mind didn't wander all over the place and get me distracted... It was so wonderful that I wanted to cry because I've never felt like that. Is that how people with a normal brain get to feel all the time? I have got to talk my psychiatrist into letting me try some ADHD medication because now that I know I could be so focused, I want that back. Speaking of the gym, had my first ever harassment at the gym on Friday. Not the sexual kind, thank dog, because there would've been corpses. But there was this middle-aged dude who saw fit to ask whether it's safe to work out with a fresh tattoo (I had it wrapped up), like, wtf, how the fuck was that any of his business? He also tried to mansplain some other stuff to me, but I had earbuds on and saw easier to pretend I didn't hear him. Exactly the kind of dude that wouldn't have dreamed of saying any of that stuff to another man, but I'm a woman so of course I must not know what I'm doing, right? Fucking idiot. I miss my uni gym and the civilized representatives of the male gender there, only a week left and I can return there. And speaking of tattoos, the ink bleeds during the first few days. Like, a lot. I kind of freaked out after I took the saran wrap off on the first morning, I was not prepared at all for how much the ink could spread. Measurements 09/08/2015 Height: 164 cm Weight: 60.6 kg | -1.0 (woohoo, weight, keep going!) Chest: 94 cm | +-0 Waist: 72 cm | -0.5 Hips: 98 cm | +-0 Bicep: 27 cm | +-0 Thigh: 57.5 cm | -0.5 So yeah. I don't know where I have gotten smaller, but it must have happened somewhere, right?