sarakingdom

I have my final Rivers of London victim for the haunted biscuit tin on the cusp of reading, so I need to prepare my tin enchantment. The common thread between tomten and brownies and other Northern European housework elves is that they need to be paid in food, but despise gifts or thanks. So, basically, they want a job. I will be putting a magical "help wanted" ad in my biscuit tin with some basic job description and a salary range (mostly porridge, sometimes shared cookies), and it should be haunted in no time. After that, I have @juliebarkley, Snarky, and Tank on the someday list, which coincidentally is the number of readers I need for the next prize, which is Victorian grape shears that were definitely not used for an inappropriate magical purpose.

It takes time to get past the "a single sprig of fresh basil costs $3" rationing stage, and into the "not only is it free, but it'll just go to waste if I don't eat it, and also I have ten thousand sprigs" stage. Then it becomes pretty easy to treat to as just another vegetable. I probably had the equivalent of $8 of basil in my eggs this morning. About as much oregano in the chili last night and twice as much basil and oregano the night before that. (which, to be fair, were both for many people, not just me). I've been eating these eggs once or twice a day for a week, and it's only now reaching the point, after twelve cups of basil in one week, where I'm looking at the basil plants and thinking I might need to cut back for a few days to let them catch up. Not stop, just... cut back slightly. Maybe $4 of basil for breakfast. Eating them in that quantity is easier if you put them in something cooked. At least wilted. They're pretty pungent when fresh picked, heat mellows them a bit. I was worried I might get complaints from the other people eating my cooking when I stepped up my herb game so radically, but so far, it's all been a hit.

Do not doubt the trolling experience of Thomas Nightingale. He's been doing it longer than most people. Over a century of trolling. Training Performance Report Officer: Sara Kingdom Date: 22/09/23 Department: Special Assessment Unit Formae Daily Crura impello Bonus Boxing practice Yoga Visiting genii locorum Even Days Tabula scindere Orantes scindere Dorsum scindere recta, crux, obliquum & ramosa Reminders Electrolytes Score: Magical Ritual Cast one circle a day Ground energy once a day Score: Recovery 2 hours training started before noon. 6-8 hours sleep. In bed by midnight Bonus: 6pm schedule check-in and support tasks Score: Silentium Mentis Mindfulness Metta Body Scan Score: Home Front Reintegration I'm afraid I'm out of touch with the modern resources on shell shock and nervous exhaustion and the like. Do one thing a day related to 'mental health' education or improvement. Score: Record Keeping Make a daily plan Journal practice Make a weekly and monthly plan Score: Space reserved for office use Date rec'd: Initialed by: Form ID: Zulu Foxtrot 18.C.68-v2-Jun-1977 (ZF.18.C.68/1977.06) (Supercedes form 64B from Nov 1932) For internal use only. Sensitive records. Not to leave the Folly.

Coffee always has something creamy in it. That's an important element of coffee.

I don't anticipate bad prose being a problem, no. It may not be the story or style you're in the mood for, and thus warrant putting down after a good college try, but the technique isn't gonna suck. That's pretty safe.

Chocolate mint.

Well, now I've started putting giant handfuls of herbs into every meal. Two cups of basil here, a cup of oregano there. Nothing is safe.

Technically, fifty pages is the threshold when I get the reader credit. But I figure that when you start it, you're good for fifty pages, and I will begin my biscuit tin enchantment process.

I'm down from a twenty hour sleep deficit to a thirteen hour sleep deficit, which should come down a bit more once last night's sleep is factored in, maybe 10-11h. Single digits is livin' the dream. Anything under seven is arguably not really a deficit, but in the normal range. I've achieved that for very brief periods in my life.

I believe I have worked out how to enchant my biscuit tin. One more victim, and Project Haunted Biscuit Tin is go.

Obligatory rugby content. Modern wizardry, guys. I suspect 50% of Nightingale's idea of modern professional managerial skills are in fact rugby coaching skills. Training Performance Report Officer: Sara Kingdom Date: 21/09/23 Department: Special Assessment Unit Formae Daily Crura impello Bonus Boxing practice Yoga Visiting genii locorum Odd Days Tabula scindere Præfixa tabula scindere Gluteus pontis scindere Gluteus sedet scindere Volans scindere Calf raises Reminders Electrolytes Crura impello. Scindere. Score: 2 Magical Ritual Cast one circle a day Ground energy once a day Score: Recovery 2 hours training started before noon. 6-8 hours sleep. In bed by midnight Bonus: 6pm schedule check-in and support tasks Sleep. Training. (Just.) Score: 2 Silentium Mentis Mindfulness Metta Body Scan Body scan. Score: 1 Home Front Reintegration I'm afraid I'm out of touch with the modern resources on shell shock and nervous exhaustion and the like. Do one thing a day related to 'mental health' education or improvement. Score: Record Keeping Make a daily plan Journal practice Make a weekly and monthly plan Score: Space reserved for office use Date rec'd: Initialed by: Form ID: Zulu Foxtrot 18.C.68-v2-Jun-1977 (ZF.18.C.68/1977.06) (Supercedes form 64B from Nov 1932) For internal use only. Sensitive records. Not to leave the Folly.

And not overly inclined to meddle in the kitcheny realm. That would be rude. They have a division of labor. Apparently it's not betrayal if it's one's job to ensure people are training safely. Apparently. (This, I have been told, is my own fault for selecting him to oversee my challenge.) Shhh. Stupid wizard already thinks he knows nearly everything.

Training Performance Report Officer: Sara Kingdom Date: 20/09/23 Department: Special Assessment Unit Formae Daily Crura impello Bonus Boxing practice Yoga Visiting genii locorum Even Days Tabula scindere Orantes scindere Dorsum scindere recta, crux, obliquum & ramosa Calf raises Reminders Electrolytes Crura impello. Score: 1 Magical Ritual Cast one circle a day Ground energy once a day Grounding energy. Score: 1 Recovery 2 hours training started before noon. 6-8 hours sleep. In bed by midnight Bonus: 6pm schedule check-in and support tasks Sleep. Training. Score: 2 Silentium Mentis Mindfulness Metta Body Scan Mindfulness. Body scan. Score: 2 Home Front Reintegration I'm afraid I'm out of touch with the modern resources on shell shock and nervous exhaustion and the like. Do one thing a day related to 'mental health' education or improvement. Score: Record Keeping Make a daily plan Journal practice Make a weekly and monthly plan Sort of a daily plan. Score: 1 Space reserved for office use Date rec'd: Initialed by: Form ID: Zulu Foxtrot 18.C.68-v2-Jun-1977 (ZF.18.C.68/1977.06) (Supercedes form 64B from Nov 1932) For internal use only. Sensitive records. Not to leave the Folly.

Now I feel cheated because I didn't get hot chocolate with my suspension. (I'm focusing on that rather than THE BETRAYAL.)

My condolences on your loss. Ours is supernaturally healthy. I'm trying to keep it under control by being its native predator. I'm literally eating it by the fistful once or twice a day.

My breakfast lately has involved giant handfuls of freshly harvested basil and green onions, and I could not be happier about it.

A review of Falcon-related activity on the tube, narrated by one of the models for Inspector Nightingale. Presumably a training video for Transport for London. Training Performance Report Officer: Sara Kingdom Date: 19/09/23 Department: Special Assessment Unit Formae Daily Crura impello Bonus Boxing practice Yoga Visiting genii locorum Odd Days Tabula scindere Præfixa tabula scindere Gluteus pontis scindere Gluteus sedet scindere Volans scindere Calf raises Reminders Electrolytes Rehab exercise. I'll allow it. Score: 1 Magical Ritual Cast one circle a day Ground energy once a day Both. Score: 2 Recovery 2 hours training started before noon. 6-8 hours sleep. In bed by midnight Bonus: 6pm schedule check-in and support tasks Sleep. 16h deficit. Started training before noon. Score: 2 Silentium Mentis Mindfulness Metta Body Scan Metta. Score: 1 Home Front Reintegration I'm afraid I'm out of touch with the modern resources on shell shock and nervous exhaustion and the like. Do one thing a day related to 'mental health' education or improvement. Tangential thing. Score: 1 Record Keeping Make a daily plan Journal practice Make a weekly and monthly plan Sorta one point between them all? Oh dear. Score: 1 Space reserved for office use Date rec'd: Initialed by: Form ID: Zulu Foxtrot 18.C.68-v2-Jun-1977 (ZF.18.C.68/1977.06) (Supercedes form 64B from Nov 1932) For internal use only. Sensitive records. Not to leave the Folly.

grumble grumble one little twenty-hour sleep deficit and some wizard suspends me from training the nerve

Scientia potestas est Society of the Wise • Est. 1775 The Folly Russell Square London, WC1B 7ZF 18th September, 2023 Dear Ms Kingdom, I have concerns. In place of a weekly review, please accept this 24 hour medical suspension. We will discuss this further, and soon. Yours, Thomas Nightingale Detective Chief Inspector, Metropolitan Police Acting President, Society of the Wise

A common problem.

Is it... is it possible you are a goat?

There is no link between Vikings and Zen. There is no link between small British cafes and Zen. It is because it is Vikings breaking into song in a small British cafe that it is Zen. I hope that clarifies things. If not, meditate on this koan until clarity arrives.

I'm pleased to have shared this theologically important fact with you today. Because the fact that it's Vikings breaking into song in a small British cafe is what makes the spam chant so important in Zen.

That is the spam Viking song!

I promised a certain fictional wizard weekly rugby content in return for his challenge coaching, so here are the best tackles of the 2022/2023 season. I really don't understand rugby. My best summary is this: a team launches a circus aerialist in an arc high in the air, where a ball appears in his hands, and then he gets dragged under the surface of a seething mass of barely organized gang warfare three bodies deep and drowns. One of gang members escapes with the ball to indicate he's "it" and starts playing tag in a grassy field by himself while violent street brawls periodically erupt on top of him, and you get points for faceplanting in the grass while "it" in a certain zone after your leg has been ripped off. This is apparently rugby, the sport of gentlemen, wizards, and gentleman wizards. My best guess is that it's a form of team martial art, and the ball mostly exists to create a shifting randori focus in a complex combat situation, and the scoring is a way of counting randori failures. Training Performance Report Officer: Sara Kingdom Date: 14/09/23 Department: Special Assessment Unit Formae Daily Crura impello Bonus Boxing practice Yoga Visiting genii locorum Even Days Tabula scindere Orantes scindere Dorsum scindere recta, crux, obliquum & ramosa Reminders Electrolytes Crura impello. Score: 1 Magical Ritual Cast one circle a day Ground energy once a day Score: Recovery 2 hours training started before noon. 6-8 hours sleep. In bed by midnight Bonus: 6pm schedule check-in and support tasks Sleep failure. Score: Silentium Mentis Mindfulness Metta Body Scan Score: Home Front Reintegration I'm afraid I'm out of touch with the modern resources on shell shock and nervous exhaustion and the like. Do one thing a day related to 'mental health' education or improvement. Score: Record Keeping Make a daily plan Journal practice Make a weekly and monthly plan Score: Space reserved for office use Date rec'd: Initialed by: Form ID: Zulu Foxtrot 18.C.68-v2-Jun-1977 (ZF.18.C.68/1977.06) (Supercedes form 64B from Nov 1932) For internal use only. Sensitive records. Not to leave the Folly.