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  1. Well two things are bugging me right now. 1. Wake is tomorrow and I have no clue where my dress pants are. 2. New CEO and some other people from the new company came to the office to visit. They didn't even come in to say hi and introduce themselves which isn't a huge inconvenience when my company has less than 20 people and most of them are spread between 3 rooms. They did meet with the 4 sales/support guys though. I was hoping for some peace of mind by meeting them. Anywho back to looking for my dress pants.
  2. Thats okay... the fact my ride was still good makes it fine. My body is so tired though. I am wondering if maybe I should try switching my lessons to Tuesday instead of Mondays because then at least I get a day to ride and get back into it before my lesson. Thank you Bean ❤️ -hug- I appreciate that. == Yesterday I worked on my finance road map a bit around lunch. It is not quite organized how I would like so I will keep working on it. Last night, I put my book away at 9:40 and tried to sleep cause exhausted. However, I couldn't get comfortable and rolled around a bunch. I think finally around 11-11:30 I finally fell asleep. Today we meet our new overlords and their tech department. Hopefully we will get a better idea what their vision for us is. It would be nice to hear from them that they don't want anything to change just like our bosses have already said. I am thinking I should book an appointment with my chiropractor or a massage therapist. My shoulders have been so tight and I think that might be part of the reason I haven't been able to sleep.
  3. We were having an off night. Between the exhaustion and the I dont wanna and the freezing cold my instructor cancelled my lesson and said we would continue next week. I still had a really good ride once I got warmed up but I'm so tired and bleh. Daisy getting all cozy in her blankies getting ready to go back outside. And my plans tonight are reading then going to bed early.
  4. Good things 😊 I've seen people who do landscapes start with an orange or rust orange background. I think the idea is it gives it more .... Varience? It's a difference experience then painting on white for sure. Good luck! Can't wait to hear how it goes. I'm secretly hoping the lady is like oh... Ok... yup you were doing amazing. Right thanks. Oh that really makes sense.
  5. Woohoo made it to the end. re:painting - I like the big tree and the sky. You really nailed the top of it. I feel it has promise BUT if you don't feel motivation then paint that sucker white.. or better orange. Not sure if you want suggestions but I might vary the blue in the sky. Often the brighest blue is near the top (but very subtly). And for the path you can create depth by making the path a bit more skinny in the horizon. With how you have the path it looks like it is a short distance to the background. But the smaller trees on the hill kind of imply that they are supposed to be further away. And for more interest... right now it looks like all the trees are planted in a line. If you make the "furthest" away trees darker it will add more depth and make them look like its a forest rather than a line. Wow that was a lot of "____ didn't go as planned" lol but it sounds like you did well for what was given to you. And it sounds like you helped M a few times. Have you stopped trying to help the guy beside you at bell practice yet? I was wondering about that. IE definitely sounds interesting and like you need to go through a re-wiring period. Do they give you different steps based on which type of eater you were? I know you said you resonated with the dieter persona.
  6. Oh I forgot I can now share the other Thursday news regarding my work. My place of employment got bought by a bigger company. My boss boss and boss promise that nothing will change and the new overlords are letting us keep our work culture and letting us operate as normal. So we shall see. We meet some of their tech department tomorrow.
  7. So for Week 3... - Start finance road map (Jan - Mar expenses) - Survive Wake/Funeral (Wed, Thurs) - Varnish doggo - Start cow painting - Try on new undergarments - Bonus: Take down Christmas garland - Bonus: Return undergarments that don't fit
  8. I've been slowly falling off routine. Been slacking on water (though I'm still drinking at least 1L) but got my teeth flossed every day. I've not been eating the greatest necessarily or having slightly to big of portions so been feeling like poop. Part of it was not wanting to put effort in and the other was we had a nice little snow storm so I made comfort foods. My sleep has been horrible for probably a week or two (I don't sleep well when my body is sore) and I've been having trouble falling asleep. I think I either got my water mark today or got close. I prepped my lunch for tomorrow and Tuesday and made sure it has lots of veggies. I'm also now putting my phone away after this and attempting to sleep. This has been one hell of a start to 2020 but I'm still here and I'm still moving forward.
  9. Thanks. I appreciate that. So far everyone is doing well. It was sudden but we knew it would probably happen sooner than later. My work is amazing and basically said do what you gotta do. So yup .. I'll probably be able to leave early Wednesday for the wake if I need to and I can take as much time as I need Thursday. That's a very cool way to think. I think the world just needs a bit more empathy. Actually I was watching a video about tips for D&D and the person said that generally people's go to in encounters with "monsters" was to fight them instead of attempting to communicate with them. Which I was like Hmm I feel that's in real life too. === Thank you everyone for your words of support and love. I really appreciate it. This is probably my closest group of people aside from closest friends, my barn mates and coworkers. Honestly I don't think it's truly hit me yet and it probably won't until the wake and funeral. I really do not handle these things well at all and I've more or less been too calm.... So I know it's happening eventually. I've basically just been living in the Harry Potter books since Thursday and avoiding certain songs.
  10. -jingles bag of quarters- (not that I am one to speak haha)
  11. Day 9 - Mindset How well are you responding to your horse, both in and out of the saddle? What area needs the most immediate attention when it comes to your aids? I think I am making a far greater effort to respond better to my horse since last November. Before I would be more of a passenger and I didn't quite have a 50/50 mindset. As my body has been getting stronger I have been able to communicate better. Before I communicated like a toddler to my horse... loud, exaggerated and not so subtle cues. With better control of my body we have been having more adult two way conversations. I think right now the aids that need my most focus are my hand aids and my seat aids. My position has improved greatly but I am still learning how to keep these aids more subtle and controlled. And of course the more tired I get the louder they seem to get. My thoughts can also use some work. I need to practice to keep a calm thinking brain even when things get hairy. Day 10 mindset is basically a yes or no question... are you willing to put in the work with all you learnt the following weeks to become a better rider and work on controlling the things you can control (yourself). Which of course I am.
  12. Thank you everyone for the love and support. Yesterday I stayed working until about 3 because that's when I finally talked to my sister. She didn't feel up to going to the barn so I told her that's fine and I'll change Grens blanket for her. I went into the field and got both ponies at once because screw going in that mud pit twice. They were so well behaved ♥️ considering I didn't even have a halter on Daisy ... I just used a neck rope. I took my time grooming Daisy. I brushed out her tail nicely. While I was brushing her tail the country song "grandpa's never died" came on. I had a little tear moment. We took it slow during our ride. We pretty much were alone the whole time at the barn except for when my barn owner came and hung out for love 10 minutes. It was pretty nice. I finished up at the barn and went to get BF from our friends house and ended up staying there for 4hrs just hanging and talking. The distraction was nice.
  13. Thanks everyone. I have been doing pretty good at keeping it together but then as I was out at lunch of course my big brother called T_T stupid big brother. We joked about things and laughed so that was nice but still too close to home when I am trying to play it cool and keep it together.
  14. Okay this gave me a good laugh. I approve of the solution as well