Kishi

These moments are cool. I had something similar with my car at my parent's place this past Tuesday. Dad calls me the mechanic now. It's validating.

Yeah, that's bull. I'm sorry they're treating you like that. Have you been feeling deprived as a result?

Okay, so, we are already learning that there's a wee problem with the way I'm doing S&S, and that's that I'm not focusing enough. The present protocol calls for 100 swings and 10 Turkish get ups "timeless," ie no hard time limit to get it done. This is for preservation of body and technique and to manage the training load, which is not too heavy and not too light and needs to be hit as often as possible. Fair enough! But the practice that should be taking 30 minutes or so is in fact taking an hour or more, and that's because I'm abusing the protocol. I need to not do that. It's gonna cut my benefits for one thing and it's gonna cause a compliance issue for another. So I need to be more disciplined about this. Good news is, my elbow seems to like the program so far. It's a little trickier with one-armed swings, even at low weight, so I've been experimenting with more two-arm work which feels just fine. Shoulder's managing the load well too. Didn't write or meditate yesterday. Worked overtime instead. Booooo. I played some video games after and felt good for doing so. I started playing Celeste, which is hard and I need a controller to play, which I got and feels really good and also really nostalgic. I also started making Hades runs with it and there are some elements of the game that are so much easier when compared to the mouse-and-keyboard set up. The game automatically aims a bunch of your attacks for you and it kind of feels like cheating? And I'm totally here for it? So yeah. Gonna apply some discipline to my training today and get it done. Some of my striking teammates are out for tournament today so I'm gonna go root for them and hang after this. Should be good times.

Hi! So this past Tuesday, I had something of an epiphany. I went home to help my dad out with some chores about the place. Nothing strenuous in particular, but it reminded me of an old guideline from Simple and Sinister about testing yourself against unusual and unorthodox demands every now and again. This has always worked out for me to being a matter of serving others somehow, because everyone needs help with moving their couch. I found that I missed the program a great deal. I've also been working on losing some body fat per the latest iteration of Berkhan's Leangains protocol, which is basically all protein all the time. He's suspicious of "fuckarounditis," or trying to train everything and ultimately training nothing. My latest measurements indicate that I'm actually gaining fat on this protocol right now, and that's a matter of compliance more than it's anything else. The past month has been remarkably social, and I've not had all that much opportunity to be compliant. I can't do anything about the social component beyond damage control, but I can do something about my training, and I think it's worth it. New plan is to hit S&S on as near to the daily as I can. GB training is going to be broken up some as a result - no more core movements and one upper-body movement per day, plus one leg movement and 1-2 days of handstand work. Reason being that GB's protocols call for integrated mobility, and in their core series they all ultimately work out to having a lumbar flexion component that Pavel warns against. S&S in its current iteration fortunately can make space for this - once I get back to lifting the 32, the recommended days drop off from daily to 3-4 days per week, and I can return to core training then. In the meantime, the work I'm doing will build me toward a Hollow Back Press, and a Straddle Planche, which are non-flexion core strengtheners which would be good to have a base in by the time I get to the point that it matters. Fortunately, everything should work just fine, I think. The past few days have felt pretty good in terms of me getting what I want. Now the trick is to work in qigong and stretching, which I think I can do as long as I'm focused properly on it. So here are the challenge goals: Goal 1: Train Bit of a gimme, but consistent logging is good for me when I make changes like this, so I can confront myself and be honest about what's happening and whether I like it or not. Goal 2: Meditate This fell off in the past week. Dedicate 10 minutes a day to relaxing my mind. This feels like something I can get after now, but I'm reserving the right to adjust if needed. Goal 3: Write This fell off in the past week too. No excuses, and the good news is that when I've done work, it's been good, deep, structural work. I've been figuring out what kind of cast of characters I need and who they are in relation to the structure of the story, which is good to do. Now I need to keep going. I don't really know how to quantify it at this point beyond "just sit down and do the thing," but I think I can do it. And, yeah. I've been writing down what I do on the mats afterward and that alone has been helpful, but I've had a hard time with actually doing the homework of reviewing videos and taking notes. This could be better. Just a matter of making time, really. Can do. Will do? That remains to be seen. But, uh, yeah. T-minus a couple days. Let's go.

It's the right call. I can't think of a way to wear a mask and do martial arts unless it's just absolutely no contact in any meaningful way. I hope you're feeling better since then.

Hell yeah! You absolutely want to get to the end of a challenge feeling better than you did at the start. That's the whole point. Great work!

Well, win some, learn some, right? You either figure out what works for you or you don't, and both of these are good, because you either reap benefit or else get information that you can use to make things better in the long run. So, cool! Great work!

Spices are your friend here. Spices and MSG. You can dress up the same foods in a lot of really different ways to scratch a lot of different itches while still pursuing the desirable results. Also, can confirm as someone who's gone from cutting to maintenance that you want to do it in small jumps. There's no real way for me to know what maintenance is after a cut since my thyroid ensures that I can't hit a consistent weight during cutting phase, so I have to add back on slowly and watch my measurements to see what happens. I've heard that that's a good approach for normal people too, so FWIW you're probably on the right track with that idea. You may have a timing issue with that, though, depending on how long you want to take a break versus returning to cutting. Just food for thought. Anyway, echoing everyone else in saying congratulations about your weight loss! You're right smack dab in the middle of the healthy range which is about where you'd want to be, and during winter no less! That's really impressive to me. I'm happy for your success.

Borrowing for reference

Keeping going is challenge enough, sometimes. Solidifying your progress and figuring things out is as worthy a goal as any, I'd say.

No worries! I'm here for you.

I mean... yeah. Yeah. It's weird because on the one hand, I feel like I should want more and better than I have now, but on the other hand my hips feel nice and loose and I can kick as high as I need to without pain or tightness anywhere. I guess I'm just satisfied with where I am right now. More is not always better, and sometimes enough is enough. It may be more productive to make my peace with that. Oh yeah. The cast basically comments on your progress throughout the game and in some ways death becomes an almost preferable outcome. The return to the main hub is almost a reward in some ways, although to get the most out of it, you really do need to make forward progress. But like, even on the game's easy mode, you're going to die a lot. It's just how the game chooses to tell its story. And so the game tries to make it easier to deal with. Here's a Wisecrack video about it if you don't mind some spoilers: Yeah man, same. If I can go shorter, I like to, just because less time on the other stuff means more mat time in general. For all that I screw around with a lot of different stuff, I do prefer to get in and get out and be done. I know, right? I know for a fact that his PT underlings know what a TGU is, so how he doesn't know, especially as a shoulder specialist? I just. Well, yeah, and like. Even with the normal programming, everything is still superset with mobility work of some kind. So it just feels excessive otherwise. Sure! I started off with a 16 kg (Isabel), then a 24 (Anna-bell), then a 32 (Mary-bell). These were mine for a while before I started to double-up and invest in lower weights as well. So there's my 8 kg (Mirabel), and my 12 (Christa-bell), as well as my most recent addition, the 4 (Baby-bell). I like to joke further and say that while my friends are engaging in poly-amorous relationships, I engage in a poly-bellicose relationship. Sure! So the basic idea is to engage in stretching and mobility work with the ultimate goal of accomplishing this kind of bridge: So it's a lot of stretching the shoulders and the traps and opening up the ribs and attempting to minimize the lumbar component. I think I could! And in fact that's probably what I'll wind up doing in some way or other. I've noticed that I do really well with daily doses of stretching and mobility, just in terms of compliance, and the qigong stretching routine would slot pretty neatly with that. There'd be a bit of a challenge in terms of being mindful and not pushing too hard, but I don't think that's a bad thing really. * And so we come to the end of the challenge. Or at least, we did yesterday. I really haven't been tracking much the past few days. Basic gist is that my sleep's been fine, training's been fine, but meditation and writing have not been. These are areas that I need to continue to work on, and will probably be the center of the next challenge. That or stretching/flexibility work. It could really be both/and, if I'm being real about it. I'll give it a dry run this week to see how it all feels, and build my challenge around the observations. Otherwise, though, this challenge had a lot going on. Lots of ups and downs and having to adapt to things I don't control. A good challenge, really, and humbling in a lot of ways. Hopefully I can learn something from what happened here. And, yeah. That's that. My thanks as always to everyone who made time to stop by in whatever way y'all could. @Treva, @Rurik Harrgath, @Scaly Freak, @The Most Loathed, @KB Girl, @Jupiter, @Everstorm, @Mistr, @Sovalis, @Tanktimus the Encourager, @Stronkey Kong, @analogwatch, @sarakingdom, @Maggie-Miau, and anyone else I missed along the way. See y'all next round!

Very, but a lot more forthright with its story. Well, it's one full hour dedicated to a particular range of stretching. So none of the three main routines are full-body, but it's like 45 minutes on everything related to front split, 45 minutes on everything related to middle splits, and 45 minutes on everything related to a "thoracic bridge," which is basically a longer-form bridge with the bend primarily in the thoracic rather than the lumbar spine. In the meantime, the rest of the stuff you're supposed to be doing in the GB program involves what's called "integrated mobility" as a form of active rest. So you do whatever progression of whatever move and then your active recovery is the mobility work. So, really, another thing that stops me from doing the stretch work is that I feel like I get a lot of benefit just as is, you know? * So, I looked up and compared GMB's programs and, actually, I think I like GB's program better. GMB does have a MMA-specific stretching protocol, but it still takes about 40 minutes or so and they want you to do it every day, so it'd actually be more time spent on the work than I was spending already, and that'd be on top of the integrated mobility I'm doing now. That's not exciting. 😕 But it's good to know. I know that the present integration I'm doing generally calls for the stretches to be done after martial arts, but it may be that I should just cram one after the other, if that's hard for me to do. And it is. So. I guess I'll have a chance to test that theory tomorrow, then.

If you aren't reading him already, Mark Sisson's a pretty decent resource for this kind of thing. I think he'd say that an 80/20 split is desirable, where when you're on your own, you do Keto, and when Dave's in town, you relax a bit. You end up building a kind of seasonality into life that way, which would be appropriate since humans are more like gardens than machines. Food for thought.

Had you been using deload weeks before? Might not be bad to work into rotation every 4-6 weeks or so.

Yeah, I can see how that makes sense. In KB sport, y'all have "standard issue" bells where they're all the same size and you just change up the weight. I can see how that would work. It'd be kind of weird with the non-regulated sizes, but given that the alternative is just gripping multiple bells in hand, maybe that makes sense out here in the wilds, too. I could see how that would help with my loaded carries especially. Cool! Thanks for pointing this out! It can be a challenge. The game gets fun if you can build your character enough to feel powerful in the runs, but if it helps any, the game also tries to reward failure too and it always tries to be encouraging. Loss and failure are genuinely necessary parts of the gameplay loop, which is weird and kind of hard to accept, but ultimately worth it. At least I think so. * Goal 1: 25.5/30 Goal 2: 23/30 Goal 3: 22/30 Gugh. Yesterday was fine, but it was rough going. Basically, the nerd night got moved to Thursday this week, so I had a training opportunity. I took the training opportunity and was glad for it; it's just that I'd forgot how logistically rough this all gets sometimes and being out ultimately delayed a bunch of stuff. The biggest thing is the flexibility work that GB wants me to do. Gymnastic Bodies has these long stretch videos where they basically want you to find an hour and just stretch out every little thing. And I just couldn't find it yesterday. Not and get my work done and get to the mats. And this is a pretty consistent problem; I just can't seem to find the extra three hours a week I need to do all the stretching they want me to do. There are options here. Brute force this; try to find those three hours and make whatever sacrifice is necessary in the name of health and longevity. This would be tricky. I'd get to work on flexibility, but I'd probably lose mat time and this challenge has, if anything, really clarified for me just how important that time is to me. So, not really realistic, but an option nevertheless. GMB stretch protocols. GMB doesn't offer this anymore, but I retain access to an old stretching protocol of theirs which had tailored routines for martial arts and for obtaining front and middle splits. May even have a bridge/postural series for me to work in too, which would be dope. Homebrew it. The resources I'm using for qigong also have a stretching routine which I could probably implement really easily. As far as thoracic work is concerned, I could just go ahead and take up the Convict Conditioning series again. I'd probably homebrew that again too, though, and just shoot for sets of 20 as opposed to the sets of 50+ reps that Wade programs. It's something to think about. All of these are mixed bags in terms of good and bad, so it's an optimization problem where I try to maximize the benefits and minimize the costs. But hey. Is life, no? Anyway, I'm at the office today. Had stuff to take care of, so here I am. Getting to work through some logistics in terms of planning out and packing my food for the day. Not quite sure what a long-term strategy looks like, since the sequence of places is going to be job-academy-gym, but it's better to know that now and experiment than to be caught flatfooted later.

I take that to mean that y'all are sensible on the other end of the KB spectrum. That's something I can take and use on my end. I shall. :'D Also, little incremental weights for kettlebells! That does sound like genius! Where do they usually go? I would think you'd have to mount them on the handle or something. * Okay, here we go: Goal 1: 24.5/29 Goal 2: 23/29 Goal 3: 21/29 Part of the reason I was terse yesterday was that there really isn't all that much to report. I missed the mark with last Friday in terms of getting up on time to go striking, but given that Friday is the sparring day and given that I'm not cleared to spar, I'm not sure how much it actually matters. Of course, you could say that I could have practiced for it anyway, and I didn't do that, although I did get a full night's sleep. So, docked half a point. Writing's been super-productive. Character studies continued. I wrote prose I liked, which was good for me, because I sometimes forget that I can actually write prose that I like. It's good to remember I can do this. Um, I decided to start in on the Snowflake Method, because I think that's a somewhat looser format that will give me both a structure to build on and some room to improvise. I still hope that I get to keep my ear for conflict and response that the Scene-Sequel Method gave me, but I'm hopeful that I can add that in as a necessary spice rather than being forced to build it in a weird way like what I was trying before. We'll see. There's a lot of changes in between this last draft and the next, so I'm not gonna call anything for sure just yet. Meditation's been rocky. I haven't really been doing it. Not even taking a few slow breaths before going to bed. Just been too... not tired, really, but kind of anxious to go to sleep. Not making enough time to convince myself that meditation was a good idea, but looking at the numbers now, I can officially acknowledge to myself that I've been shortchanging myself. As far as training goes, Thursday was a strength-training day. Wound up going to write instead of going out on the mats. It feels like something I should do while I can and as I can, since Writer Friend is getting ready to move away and while there isn't a timetable for it, the days feel numbered. Long term, I suspect this will revert to a training day, and I don't mind that. Friday was an easier training day. Saturday was a mat-time drilling day; was partnered with a good white belt who was sensitive to my arm, which was damned decent of him. Also one of my favorite coaches teaches that day and he was good enough to keep an eye on me and check on me throughout, which I appreciated. Strength trained afterward, as I'm trying to make that my habit. Shoulder was okay with this. Sunday I slept pretty late; I had enough time to play a run of Hades and talk with friends for a while before having to go off and visit my folks. Took time. Enough time for me to not be able to train. As happens every now and again. Dunno if I necessarily needed the rest, but I'm at a point in my training journey where I accept it when it comes and I enjoy it as it comes. So far today, I've bought a 4 kg kettlebell (her name is Baby-bell) and took up that snatch-walking protocol that I mentioned a challenge or two ago. No real sense of strain or exertion, but it feels good to practice. Since I didn't do it yesterday, I paired it today with the farmer's carries I've been doing for my lower back, and everything carried off just fine. Not exactly my first choice, but Mondays/Fridays/Sundays are basically practice days of some kind or other and it's really not bad to work stuff in and around as life allows at this point. Once I'm cleared to begin inversions again, I'll have to revisit, but I'm not all that worried about it. In any event I am on track to get done and get onto the mats for striking practice and further grappling drilling. Fun times.

Yeah. I think you're completely right. I've been steeped in their propaganda a long time and they've stuck by 8 kg jumps in their kettlebell progressions for as long as I've studied. They reason that these jumps necessitate perfect technique and they act as a preservative against injury, because the trainee will know if they're too hurt and doing it wrong. I call shenanigans. I think they're leaving a lot of strength and progression on the table doing that, and practice is completely possible using smaller jumps. Yeah, man. I honestly underestimated how much we were doing until I went back to write it down and it turns out to be, like, 8 different things. Which is fine, but it's a hell of a lot of information to keep. Yeah. And I should know better. I've lived that out often enough. I keep forgetting that. Well, for me, it's not a purpose issue so much as it's a gut check. I feel like I don't have enough excuses for how much worse I am than these kids who have a similar amount of responsibility and yet get so much better so much faster. There are people who started this, like I was there for their first class, who made blue this past promotion when I've been stuck here for years. Gives me impetus to ponder. Well, thankfully that's been going great. The folk I train with have been really good about being delicate with my shoulder and communicating with me and being receptive to it when I talk to them. People honestly just seem to be glad to see me again, which in itself has been pretty great. Yeah, but in my field of endeavor, it's not like the people recognizing you have an objective view either. Not really. It's more of a vibe than anything else, which isn't fun if nobody's picking up what you're putting down. And thank you. * I... don't have time for an update now. Things are fine. Could be better, could be worse. I'm coming off terse right now because of time crunch but it's really okay. I'll update y'all later.

Yeah, it's not a thing worth chasing on its own, but it's still nice. Congratulations.

Nice! Good to see them recognize. Now to be a just and fair ruler of your corporate space.

Hell yeah. You're doing great. I love to read how you're controlling your controllables and learning to let go of the things you don't. Also, eff those people who are condescending you. That is all. I've heard that Turkish Delight is kind of an acquired taste, but I'm always curious about how that turns out, so let us know!

Ah! I can see how that would be tricky to get used to.

Aw, those are so cool, though! I kind of want one for myself, for my work laptop. And maybe my own laptop as well. What kind are you using?

Thanks! I was able to show a TGU to my ortho yesterday. Apparently, he'd never heard of it before, which, I mean, what. Their PT office is just down the hall. Thanks. I'm feeling better. Thank you for being part of the space I get to take to be myself. ❤️ Thanks. Yeah, some of the older folk there have mentioned that I strike them as a humble, earnest student, and being known for that... well, it feels good. Maybe I'll be known now for being overcautious, but I can live with that too. Um, yes and no. It's a net positive overall, see below. Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry you been there too, but I'm glad you get it. Helps me feel like I'm not alone and I'm not overdoing it, like my feels are fact enough. I appreciate you for saying so. Well, some bad and some good. See below! * Goal 1: 19/23 Goal 2: 18/23 Goal 3: 21/23 All right, bad news out of the way first: ortho has not completely cleared me for training. I passed his initial movement tests, but then he made them harder and was able to reproduce my symptoms, so I'm not completely healed yet, and I wasn't completely cleared yet. Good news is, he did clear me to resume the bulk of my training and has also allowed me to return to drill classes! I'm not really cleared yet to do handstands, and I can't spar, but I can show up and drill. I relayed the good news to my OGs and reserved a spot before I could think my way out of it. Got to class and decided that in addition to taking notes of my videos (h/t to @The Most Loathed), I'm also going to list out all the techniques I can remember that we go over in class and refer back to them a week on for review. Fortunately, I can run a Google doc and watch the videos at the same time, and I've already started doing that just in my meandering reviews. It's really helped in terms of engaging with the training material. I like it. I came back home afterward and ran through training. Did TGUs with weight again; shoulder can handle up to 12 kgs at this point but I had a dull soreness afterward that didn't really abate until sometime this morning, which, uh. I should probably mind that. I think I've got a decent idea about how to progress my weights for KB work - at the moment, I'm using them for loaded carries for my lower back. I would imagine that the carries being the lowest-skill could reasonably be scaled to be the highest weight. The weight down below would be for get ups and swings, and the weight down below that would be for snatches, since my bells are separated in 4 kg increments. So that means my walks are at 12 kgs, so my TGUs and swings would only be at 8 kgs, and my snatches... are off the menu, since I don't have a lighter KB for that. Yet. I know, I know, Strongfirst and their ilk would say it's too light for a training effect, and to that I say, Practice is a training effect. So, yeah. Definitely in higher spirits today than I've been in the past while. Even if I had to skip training today to go do laundry. I suspect that this may have been a blessing in disguise, since it gives me extra rest. I'll still end up doing some kind of work tonight, though. Just antsy. Kind of feel a need to.

I will! She's good, but I'm stronger, heavier, and I know how to use those things. Thank you. I really do have the Rebellion to thank for that. A lot of folk were here for me at a lot of times I needed them to be, and I don't think I would have developed the skill without their encouragement and the space to do so. * Goal 1: 18/22 Goal 2: 18/22 Goal 3: 20/22 Docked a sleep point. I went to bed on time on the Sunday night leading into Monday, but I didn't really sleep. Too bitter to sleep. I'd actually told my folks on Sunday that I was thinking about quitting martial arts all together. Because it's too much to learn and nothing sticks and everyone else is getting better while all I'm getting is hurt. I found myself grappling with what that would look like and whether I'd still want to once the emotion was done and I was back to baseline here. That emotion isn't completely done, but it's giving me enough space to think a little more clearly about it, and I keep concluding that even if I was never recognized for it, there's enough potential for positive experience and memories, and I don't want to abandon that. Also, the Academy is on my way home from the office, and given how hard the job is working to get us back in the office no matter what we want, I don't want to be stuck driving by this place and being reminded of my failure. I need to remember that as regards my belt, there's only thing I control. I don't control its stripes. I don't control its color. The only thing I control is whether I'm going to put it on and go to work. Hopefully I get the chance to start that again today. Ortho appointment's at 3; it'd be nice to get clearance to go back, but that too is not within my control, and luckily I have a plan in place in the event that I'm not cleared. Otherwise, as regards yesterday, meditation was a little easier, and research continued in terms of what kinds of abilities my protagonist has and clarifying those. Dinner with SFF friends was fine and fun. Today is today. Some kind of strength work and such is happening at the very least. With the return of overtime, I might wind up doing that tonight instead of hitting the mats, assuming that's something I even get cleared to do. I'll play this out and we'll see what happens.