RoxyFreefall

Monday, Day 21: Food was not too bad. More studying. Sec+ is my focus right now. I really need to get it done so I can move on from here. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 10 Not too bad 2) CrossFit Passing days= 3 3) Education Passing days= 15 Studied Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Friday-Sunday, Day 18-20: Um...Trying to remember the weekend. Don't remember much. I know I did a lot of studying. Lots of sleeping Saturday night. Saw 'The Incredibles 2'. Food was so so. No CF. My CF gym is having another Summer Shred program starting next week...the 23rd. I wasn't going to participate due to the cost of it, but I know I need the support. SO I will find the money and get it done. Signed up this morning. What it entails: Meal plans for 4 weeks 3 extra work outs per week that can be done anywhere body scan at the start and end of the program weekly check ins for support Program lasts 8 weeks I gotta do this. I want to be one of coach's success stories. Maybe the good nutrition will help my head problems too. Back to CF this week, but in the Ozarks next week, THEN Summer Shred time. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 9 food wasn't great from what I can remember. 2) CrossFit Passing days= 3 3) Education Passing days= 14 Studied Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Thurs, Day 17: Tired of being tired. But I/m trying to get the core stuff done. Food was okay, then I studied. No CF again. I really need to get this Sec+ done. I should take some time to do more job searching. I have placed 3 applications, but I could be doing more. I want some time to practice my languages too. I think if I could get fluent in them or at least be able to read it it would look great on a government resume. But I am a long way off from being able to say I can read or speak a second or third language. Future goals. I meant to get to the gym more this week. But an upset digestive track has caused me to sit out. I really need to get back there. It helps me in so many ways. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 9 good 2) CrossFit Passing days= 3 3) Education Passing days= 11 Studied Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Wed, Day 16: Studied Ate okay rested The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 8 good 2) CrossFit Passing days= 3 3) Education Passing days= 10 Studied Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Thanks. I hope so too. Most of the time the dizziness is minor and doesn't interrupt much, but at the gym it interferes a bit more.

Tues, Day 15: Pretty good day. Food was controlled. BUT I have not been very hungry. I sit down for a meal and get full quick. I'm worried this is a side affect of my meds. Reapplied for a position I applied to Monday. I was not happy with my application, so their HR said I could just reapply. Applied to a new posting at the same company. Got to CF. Got a lot of dizzy spells at CF, but I have been getting dizzy off and on lately. Again I'm worried it's a side affect of my meds. I talked with coach and he thinks it is. Hopefully my body will adjust and these affects will stop. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 7 good 2) CrossFit Passing days= 3 3x3 at 75% 1rm Front Squat = 90# 2x8 at -10% the 3x3 wt Front Squat = 80# 3x5 Dead Lifts = 100# *this is somewhat new to me, I have not had formal coaching on this since mechanics over a year ago. 3xmax reps Glute Ham raises 3x8 Sandbag Squats at 40# 3) Education Passing days= 9 Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Fri-Mon, Day 11-14: The last 4 days have not been terrible really. Actually pretty good. Saturday was a "off" day for food. I have not been to CF, but I plan on getting there tonight. I spent the weekend prepping for a job fair that took place yesterday. I also went to a recruiting event last evening. Both went pretty well. I spent the afternoon looking at some of the companies I spoke with. Put in 1 application with the NGA. I am worried about that one though. I didn't see a spot for attaching my resume, and I think there probably was one. I don't see a way to fix in now though. I will look again tonight. I have studied a little Sec+, but have not looked at any of my side goals. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 6 did okay x3 2) CrossFit Passing days= 2 3) Education Passing days= 9 Pass x2 Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Thurs, Day 10: good day. food was reasonable. No CF again, but I had appointments to take care of. Chiropractor visit was much needed, and then I got my hair done. I am looking for a good practice test program for my Sec+ certification. I think we have found one through CompTia, I just need their site to work so I can purchase it. I am on the home stretch with this cert. (I think). Then I will see about taking ITIL. My husband says I need it if I am going into Systems Admin stuff. Decide that later. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 3 did okay. 2) CrossFit Passing days= 2 3) Education Passing days= 7 Pass Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Large I guess, about 100 companies I think is what I read. I do not have business cards. But I can get somewhere to get nice paper. That is a great idea. Thanks for the help.

Wed, Day9: Yesterday wasn't as good as the others, but I didn't completely fall apart either. I avoided the free chips at dinner (we went out for Mexican) and didn't eat my beans or rice. Stuck with my enchiladas. We went for ice cream after. I did skip out on CF though. I will start fresh next week. Tonight I have some appointments, tomorrow we are meeting friends, but I can get there Saturday morning I think. So an avenue I have been pursuing for a new job has closed. My husband was trying to get me in to the company he works for and they say they just don't know how to convince the government and higher ups that I am a good fit. The contact my husband has says that reading my resume he agrees I have the skills for several positions but the government is going to look at my degree and current job title and instantly stop reading. Which I think we all would agree is a big mistake. You shouldn't judge a book by its cover, the contents may surprise you. (I may have made that last part up, lol) I am trying to not get to upset by it, but I admit that it is hard. I thought this might happen, but hoped it wouldn't. Well I was right...it is going to be hard to get anyone to look past my science background to my skill set. I feel trapped. I do have a job fair I'm going to Monday. I am trying to be hopeful, and not let this set back interfere. There is one agency I'm particularly interested in. I have to go shopping for something to wear. You know when you work in a lab that has no strict dress code (jeans, shorts, tees are all okay) you tend to not have much business casual clothes. Any advice about job fairs would be very helpful. How many resumes should I bring? I assume I need a list of references? Should I flat iron my hair or can I let it be it's natural wave/curl? I have no idea what I'm doing. I'm lost in so many ways. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 3 Passing because I used a lot of self control last night. 2) CrossFit Passing days= 2 3) Education Passing days= 6 Pass Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Tues, Day8: Another decent day. No time for CF, but I found time to study. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 2 Okay, a little much at bed time. 2) CrossFit Passing days= 2 3) Education Passing days= 5 Pass Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Mon, Day7: Pretty good day overall. Ate to plan except for the handful of M&Ms at bedtime. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 1 Finally an okay day 2) CrossFit Passing days= 2 3) Education Passing days= 4 Monday. Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

So Busy....and my diet was a mess. Fri-Sun, Day4-6: Some stuff got done this weekend...a clean diet was not one of them. Side goals suffered this week due to the home projects. -Friday after work we watched Hellboy 2 (we had yet to see it, I enjoyed it) -My bedroom painting project is complete. We spent a good part of the weekend painting and reassembling the bedroom -Got the Sams to restock the house -Batch cooked for the first time in weeks -Got in 1 study session on Sunday -Hubby got the grass cut -Laundry is mostly caught up -Changed the bed linens -Took my daughter to the Zoo -Crossfit barbell class Saturday morning: It was not a great morning for me, but getting some movement in is better than doing nothing. It is not always going to bring a PR. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 0 Ate out almost all weekend...I was tired of the junk 2) CrossFit Passing days= 2 Barbell Class: 1rm Clean and Jerk = did not hit a PR I got stuck at 85# (PR is 90#) 1rm Push Press = did not hit a PR got stuck at 85# (PR is 85#) 3x10 bent over barbell rows = 65# 3xMax reps push ups = 1, 0, 0 3x max seconds Hollow Holds = ~10secs each 3) Education Passing days= 3 Sunday! Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Thursday, Day3: Not a bad day. Food is still a mess, but I haven't gotten to the store yet. I will tomorrow for sure. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 0 not terrible really. Doing okay with making due with what I have in the house. 2) CrossFit Passing days= 1 Barbell Class: 1RM Split Jerk = 105lbs, PR, added 15lbs to my previous max 3x5 Front Squat at 70% 1RM = 85lbs 3x10 dumbbell shoulder press = 15lbs 3x5 Bird Dogs (per side) 3) Education Passing days= 2 rest day Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Yeah I may have to make a loaf of bread and start packing sandwiches. That actually sounds pretty good. Thanks Jon.

It does help. It just gets expensive to go out to eat. LOL. I guess I could take my sack lunch outside. We have 2 tables and a small patch of grass outside the building. Wednesday, Day2: So I decided to see the doctor. The PA and I talked and she said she recently had a similar issue so seeked help too. We decided to try Zoloft. I will give it some time. I am trying to be optimistic and worry about how long I have to be on it, or what side affects I may have, etc. I was wanting to try something OTC but I was afraid to since I am on a prescription sleep aid. Better be safe. I am working on convincing myself I'm okay, everything else is okay, and not to worry. It is a work in progress. I talked to my husband too. He starting complaining about something our daughter did and I could feel the panic/stress setting in. I told him I can't hear it right now and I need absolute stress free living. No complaining allowed. I got some studying in. And I got to Target to pick up a few things. I need to do some cooking now. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 0 This still applies today...Food has not been good. I need to get my head together 2) CrossFit Passing days= 0 Did not get there. My foot is still sore and the WOD involved a lot of jumping so I skipped and went for a walk. Walking was still mildly uncomfortable but better than jumping. I was at CF for my daughters kids fit class and I explained to coach. He said for me not to do his job and let him modify the WODs. LOL I guess I will try to get in barbell tonight. 3) Education Passing days= 2 review happened Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Some days I put my headphones on. Music is good therapy for me. Or I go out for a walk around the block. Or go to lunch. Getting away for even a few minutes helps, but it's temporary. But even temporary relief is better than nothing.

So this week has not been great. I have yet again had to fix a mistake I made. I spent the evening reflecting on my state of mind....The conclusion....I'm not okay and I'm willing to say so. My sleep aid use to be enough to control my anxiety issues. But it is not near enough anymore. I have a hard time keeping my thoughts organized, I feel constantly panicked and out of control. All I want to do is hide in my room. I know part of this is the burn out from work and the constant chaos that is there. But part of it is a malfunctioning consciousness. I think I may need to ask a doc for help. In the mean time I am trying the following: 1) making checklists at work for more processes to ensure I get it done correctly 2) try journaling and meditation 3) get in my exercise 4) keep trying to get in the healthy food I need. 5) try to get 1 chore done per night rather than let them build up That is lot to do though and I don't want to do anything. But I force myself to keep going and not give up. I'm not depressed by my life or job but anxious and stressed by everything. My dreams are always highly stressed and I move around a lot (restless). This challenge will be just that challenging...One day at a time is what I need to focus on...just one day at a time. The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching Passing days= 0 Food has not been good. I need to get my head together 2) CrossFit Passing days= 0 Did not get there. Spent some time trying to clean up the house and do laundry. 3) Education Passing days= 1 a Quick review happened Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse Passing days= 0 2) Use the home gym once per week. Passing days= 0 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week. Passing days= 0

Thanks Terra. You always help me see the positive. I have been in a huge funk and I know it's due to being overwhelmed. I just need to take a deep breath and take it one thing at a time each day. I forgot to mention that I did get some Sec+ studying in while camping. I downloaded as much as the app would let me before I left home and was able to receive just enough signal in the middle of nowhere to study a little each day.

Thanks Guys. I think maybe the improvement was partly attributed to rowing and not running. I am a super slow runner and only a mildly slow rower. LOL. But either way I'll take it. Last year it felt like such a struggle to do a half Murph this year it was not bad at all.

Hello All- Weekend is over and I'm getting started today. Well the best I can without a restock of groceries. It is a short week so I should be okay. Focus on protein and not carbs! The holiday brought a great Murph CF WOD to honor the fallen soldiers for Memorial Day, then camping (it was HOT), then painting the bed and bath (well I started). 1) Murph. I did a modified 1/2 murph. With the pain in my foot running was going to be out of the question so I rowed instead. I completed a half murph last year with the same format but ran and finished in 44:15. Saturday I finished it in 30:55. A time improvement of 13:20! Row 800m (5 ring rows + 10 knee push ups + 15 air squats) x10 Row 800m 2) Camping with family is always fun but this year it was in the 90s. It was hot. But we talked, rode around the property, and had a blast. Food was okay. I avoided snacking for the most part. Some snacking occurred but nothing terrible. 3) It is time to start freshening up the house. It is still original to it's build 10 years ago this summer. We have decided to paint as much as we can our selves then hire somebody to paint the rest. Which will hopefully just be the great room...it has vaulted ceilings which I don't care to paint. We didn't get finished with the master bed and bath, but we got a long way. One more full day will finish it up. I just realized the food I have had and planned so far for today is too high in carbs. I need to rethink lunch. Hmmm may have to run out for a protein smoothie.

Hi Tank. Always glad to have you. Hi EE. Glad to have you. And thank you. I am doing good things in CF that is true, my weight/body fat does not seem to be responding. So I guess I just need to look at the positive things. CF is always my positive. Even when the WOD is full of stuff I can't do, I am proud that I tried my best and modified to my level. On a side note. I plan on really getting this going on Monday. I am camping this weekend so will not be tracking food or checking in. My plan though is to avoid all the chips and bad snacks.

The Challenge Goals= 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching -Update to the old plan...tracking mostly optional, but needed a few days per week. I think it would be good to track once during the week (M-TH) then for sure track on the weekend. I tend to eat the same thing Mon-Fri afternoon. So why track it everyday. Weekends are hard to stick to it on, so tracking will keep me aware. I like the low carb (<100g carbs) so it will stay. Calories need to stay around 1600. I don't lose weight if they are too high, but too low and I end up binging. 2) CrossFit The goal is just to get to class. Barbell and a WOD work out can happen on the same day. -Get to a class 4x per week or more 3) Education I started this endeavor in April and we are approaching June. So I need to pick up the pace on this. -Study for my computer certifications. I am attempting a career change into IT, so getting my security+ certification is the first step. -Study at least 4x per week. Side Goals: 1) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse 2) Use the home gym once per week. 3) Use the bicycle or run once per week.

So it's time to write a new challenge. And again I find that my weight is stuck and it's probably my fault. I am not sure what to change to make it work though. So this challenge may have a little bit of experimentation in it. I really really, more than anything, want to...lets just list the ultimate goals: Ultimate goals- %Body Fat <~25% Weight <160lbs (maybe, the goal wt depends on muscle development too) Hemoglobin A1C <7% A greatly reduced fat pad on my hips. Reduce the desire for crummy food. not suck at crossfit...be able to do the things. speak 3 languages learn a new skill for a new career. Here are my dislikes and likes- Like- meat/protein dislike- a lot of veggies want to stay away from lots of carbs (hard to regulate blood sugars) dislike- tracking most of the time, tracking is almost habit i know it is necessary i find it tedious dislike - eating less than 1600 calories, I get Hangry Is there a meal plan in there somewhere? Maybe. My success this year so far has been minimal. I see the scale go down but then it yo-yos back up. I do well following plan Monday-Friday afternoon then blow it. I have not taken measurements in a month, but know those probably haven't changed. Since I started CrossFit 1+yrs ago I have gained pounds (probably muscle), have gotten stronger, lost inches from some places and gained them in others. In short all my successes have come with failures. Canceling it all out. I have gotten no where. Here is what I have done: improved my home gym. bought a pull up bar and squat rack. Moved it out to a great place in the garage. cleaned up my bicycle worked on trying to stick with a plan on weekends. I have succeeded with mornings and some lunches...dinners are still a work in progress. trying to get to CF more regular. Yup, definitely a plan in there somewhere.

Challenge Wrap up: Not Great. I failed to practice my music twice, and missed a week or two of CrossFit. But the food was worse. I think I need to rethink the tracking. It needs to optional. I hate, but know it is necessary from time to time to keep things in perspective. I like the low carb diet. It is will stay next challenge. But the tracking...hmmm. Crossfit needs to happen also. I just need to make the time. The weight is not coming off and it is due to poor planning. I know what I need to do. Grocery shop on Saturdays/Sunday for the work week and Thurs/Fri for the weekend. No more than 30g carbs per meal Only eat when hungry...emotions don't deserve food. CF 4x per week Study in my free time...all my free time. New habits and routines can be hard to form, but perseverance will win in the end. For me denying myself the food I love is a recipe for failure. So my motto has been "everything in moderation". This is something I tell my daughter when she says something is "bad". I need to practice what I preach. 1) Food Tracking and Calorie Watching 18.5 out of 32 days Fri-Sun Failed to track. Didn't totally blow the nutrition, but didn't stick with it either. -New goal definitions: Carbs <100g, Calories don't matter but <1700/day is preferred, No Cheats 2) CrossFit 10 out of 19 days Over slept CF Corner: 3) Education 19 out of 19 days Security+ Sunday Side Goals: 1) Take care of my skin morning and night. 32 out of 32 days Done 2) Practice my spanish and polish 3 times per week. I use duolingo to learn, it has a couple of apps so there is no excuse. 12 out of 15 days Sunday + Friday 3) Practice my piano or music reading 1 time per week 3 out of 5 days Nothing