Tomu-san

You could just look up the 2010 winning lottery numbers and deliver them directly. Time fuel is expensive.

But... this is the way we always did it!

To borrow a quote from Sir Hector's doctor, "Alive and still dying." How about you?

Find a site or a YouTube channel that does recaps, read/watch that.

We have two cats that look like that - Belanos (Bela for short) and Persephone (Ni-ni). Persephone has much less white in her bib.

Where do bad rainbows go? Prism.

What's the difference between a psychologist and a magician? A psychologist spends their time pulling habits out of rats...

"I have some bad news and some worse news." "Oh no, Doctor! What's the bad news?" "Your test results came back, and they said you only have 2 days to live." "That's terrible! What news could possibly be worse?" "Well, I tried to get in touch with you yesterday...."

I remember hearing about her on some crime procedural show the wife and I watch, but I couldn't recall the name without Google. 18th century or 20th century?

Yes, plz.

Still a good start, you racist bastard!

People are shocked when they find out that I'm a lousy electrician.

Hauʻoli ka lā, Hawaii!

What does it sound like when whales cry? Blubber, blubber, blubber!

I stole my ex-girlfriend's wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back to me...

Why is it that Mothers and Fathers only get a day, but Sharks get a whole week?

In my day, the internet was called "books"...

Queen: great band or greatest band?

Late at night, the weird old house gets lonely. I guess every form of refuge has its price.

A woman is at her husband's funeral. A man sits next to her and asks, "May I say a word?" The woman says, "Yes, please do." The man stands up, clears his throat, and says, "Plethora," then sits back down. "Thank you," says the widow. "That means a lot."

What alignment is rice? Pilafal good.

There's always a way to reuse them...

What, pray tell, is a Socrates Café? They don't put hemlock in a random cup of coffee, do they?

Winters is happening here...