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About shaar

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    Fury Hearted Battle-Bard
  • Birthday 09/09/1980

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  1. Hiiiiii I am here, one whole ass week later! This week has been BUSY but now I am off until Monday so that's good. Just a quick check in, for some reason I don't really feel like posting much lately? But all is well and I'm in a good place and things are good. Maybe a bigger update tomorrow? We will seeeeeeeeeeee~
  2. I'M BACK I SALVAGED MY DAY HAHAHA TAKE THAT WEIRD STOMACH THING (and my own dumb self for forgetting my paperwork) I had a good solid cry this morning because something You Just Need It but after that I picked my whole ass up and - bought a new 2023 planner on Etsy (it is GORGEOUS and I can't wait to get it!!!), went to the bank to get a check for our dingdong loan documents, made a grocery list and planned our work lunches and dinners and went grocery shopping, came home and put everything away, took out the trashes, emptied the dishwasher (and put dirty sink stuff in there), emailed the condo people for yet another document (that I've since received in a return email woooo), called my insurance company to start the process of changing THAT over into my name... which is WAY more than I thought I would have the mental fortitude to do today but here we are. YAY ME!! I'm proud of myself! And now, off to play video games for the rest of the afternoon. Happy Friday pals, we made ittttt!!!!!
  3. YES but I always look at the WHOLE ASS THING because single serving frankly doesn't happen when dessert is involved, heheheheheheh.......
  4. I remember trying to go across the monkey bars a few years ago and being absolutely astonished at how SHITTY HARD it was as an adult. Phew.
  5. You have the cutest cats in the ENTIRE WORLD I swear!!!! (please don't tell my cat i said that)
  6. It was a GREAT DAY and everything I hoped!! Oh no now it's in my head too!! Ahahahaaaa.. GUYS UGH I PLAYED MYSELF My whole day today has gone down the TOILET So today I had planned to go to the RMV and change my name on my license, and then right after head out to my massage therapist for a deep tissue session. I woke up today and my stomach was in a FIT - Ao had stomach issues yesterday and I had some last night, but figured it would be fine by the morning - NOPE, not so much. My therapist is a good 50 minutes from home (she's much closer to my work, I usually go after work to keep the commute easier) and I was like, there's no way I can make this today, so I had to cancel uughfdkghsdflkfsdg. I'm still feeling a little janky but I figure, hey I can at least go to my RMV appointment the next town over and get that done, that will be quick enough BUT GUESS WHO FORGOT TO PRINT AND FILL OUT HER NEW LICENSE APPLICATION So I had to reschedule my appointment. AND NOW I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER MONTH UNTIL DECEMBER 2 AAAAAAAAAA WHY IS THIS TERRIBLE So now my Day of Things has essentially shit in on itself and is a Day of Shit (not so much anymore, my stomach's kinda clearing up ha) but I'm over here like.........rreksfljfsdlkfewsfds I suppose this could be like a LESSON or something for me to learn to go with the flow and just adapt and yeah I get it and I'm gonna but jeez louise what a pain. Ugh. RrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRR. At any rate I'll take it easy today, get the groceries done, and do some cleaning here. Maybe a light walk, I'm definitely going to the gym tomorrow morning though, my stomach better clear up 'cause I'm going anyways YOLO (do people even say that anymore) In other news yesterday, my Day of Nothing, was very good! I started a new video game and washed all the sheets and blankets in the house, and got to respond to a lot of loan-related emails so that process is moving, thankfully. I also made some honey walnut shrimp for dinner with brown rice - thanks Trader Joes frozen section, hehehe. They were OUTSTANDING. Welp that's all for now! Going to catch up with y'all and try to salvage this day! ONWARD NERD HEROESSSSS
  7. SKY THAT IS SO AMAZING!!! You are kicking so much ass - look at what you can accomplish!! You've come so far and you are gonna go so much farther yaaaaaass!
  8. OKAY I would honestly read this book on name alone. That's metal as hell ahahahaha
  9. Oh hey, you too?? Huh…. So yeah same, the past 6 months or so since my mom passed I will ever so often also be consumed with the slowly passing thought that YUP I’m gonna die early. Maybe it’s colon cancer, maybe it’s my heart is just gonna stop one day, I don’t know whyyyyy it’s those two things but Sal your feelings resonate with me SO HARD. Never even gave this shit a passing thought before my mom died. Now some days it literally consumes me with anxiety and despair. I wish I had something helpful to say but I really don’t… the most I can do is when I realize these feelings are with me to sit with my feelings and emotions a little bit before reminding myself that I am here TODAY and it would be a waste of today to keep worrying. That’s hard though and doesn’t always happen. I hear you tho, loud and clear. So much love to you
  10. That dress looks SO GOOD on you!! I am a big fan of that halter-esque neckline personally (it's great for showing off shoulders heheh) and the whole thing is just gorgeoussss. Also that salad is 10/10, I love a good fall salad and the goat cheese/cranberry/root veggie combo is WIN. Keep kicking ass, friend!!
  11. Sounds like November (and NaNo) is starting well for you! Keep it up, you got this!!
  12. I've never had okra I liked. I think it's a texture thing.... or a taste thing.... or both hehehehe
  13. I am a sucker for loaded nachos and those brisket ones look AMAZING. I like that they included a photo. Sometimes I like to see what I'm going to be eating....... (I also can't stop staring at the calorie count on that whole banana pudding tray wow... butttt i'd still be at the front of the line digging in because i LOVE banana pudding!!!!)
  14. Catching up here but your dining area is SO COZY! Wow the difference between the before and after photos, you can really see how much work and cleaning you did!! Definitely exhausting but the results are AMAZING I get a little anxious before travel too, every time. I try to remind myself sometimes my anxiety is just misplaced excitement, and if that doesn't work, usually once we get on the road I feel much better knowing the "travel process" is finally underway! Your beach vacation is going to be perfect for you and Rox and Bronze and you all deserve a little getaway!
  15. W E E K 1 Phew hello friends! This week has been kinda a whirlwind for me! BUT HERE I AM WOO I am just so INTENSELY GRATEFUL that as of Wednesday evening my work week is done... being able to wake up at my own pace today, stretch, make my coffee and slow my life down is irreplaceable right now. I was driving to work yesterday morning around 6:30am in the dark and feeling pretty okay, but also very aware of, if I had to do this 5 days a week right now, it would just keep digging me into that unhealthy hole of exhaustion and fatigue. I know I'm still working on processing a lot of stress and intense trauma and other stuff, and that stuff takes TIME and weighs on your body more than people think. It's hard for me to slow down but I'm starting to take a little more time to listen to myself and my body and my mind - there's something that's pulling at me to pay close attention to myself at this phase in my life and use it well, and I'm just really full of gratitude that I have this opportunity. (I know I sound like a broken record HAHA but I'm very aware of how lucky I am.) SO - for today I've made a firm decision to do.................................... NOTHING I've realized that since I've dropped to part time I've been filling my days off up with STUFF. TASKS. THINGS. And.... hehehe still kind of wearing myself down BUT JUST IN A DIFFERENT WAY. I mean I love cooking but on Sunday I spent THREE and a half HOURS in the kitchen making cupcakes for work, cooking our work lunches for the week, and making dinner. I'm kinda doing it to myself over here and I haven't had a day to do NOTHING in a long time so today will be spent on the computer, watching tv or movies, playing some games, or maybe catching up on my book... no errands, no leaving the house to do dumb shit, no massive cleaning tasks or keeping myself running all day. No gym today either - I have a deep tissue massage scheduled for tomorrow (that i DESPERATELY need owwww) so I'm going to pump the brakes a little bit and have a chill day. I need it and moreso, I deserve it DAMNIT ANYWHO As earlier mentioned Ao and I are applying for a loan and it's a royal pain in my ass - I'm trying to get MORE DOCUMENTS but the people I've reached out to Wednesday night, of course, have not gotten back to me yet and I hate having shit like this hanging over my head LIKE A CLOCK TICKING DOWN THE TIME OF WHEN ALL THIS SHIT MAYBE EXPIRES AND WE HAVE TO DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN maybe idk how loans work but i don't wanna fuck with the good apr% we got. BUT, I will give it another day and potentially reach out again tomorrow if I haven't heard anything.......... Ugh I am very ready to be done with LEGAL PROCESSES That aside I cannot believe it is already November and AAAA Thanksgiving is gonna be rolling up in here REALLY SOON!! And then Christmas!! AND THEN A NEW YEAR!! Jeez this year has really been a barn burner and has flown by - for the most part - but I'm really looking forward to the holidays and that HYGGE SHIT :3
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