MattGannon

I enjoyed this. Good on you.

Good luck, Wyrm. You have a solid head on your shoulders. I'm rooting for you.

Rock and roll, Liser. You got this.

Iron clad advice, Companion. I've been doing a lot of thinking the past few days, trying to sort myself out and get my head back in the game. I think all of you have been helping. You're definitely right in all you've said. Families just don't make sense sometimes. I don't even try to understand mine anymore. I don't even know why I have been so desperate for their approval. It's not worth it. I'm trying my best to free myself from the limitations I've shackled myself with.

You got it.

sorry, multiple post.

The best thing to do here, and this is just my opinion so feel free to disregard, is get checked out by a doctor. If you can figure out if there's something actually hindering your ability to follow through, it would be great for you to figure that out and get help so you can overcome it. The fact that you've outlined fairly specific goals means that you've put extensive thought into this and obviously have the desire. I don't know enough about physical barriers to fitness and health (chemical or whatever else), so I can't really comment on that part of it, but it sounds like it may be the only thing stopping you. You have nothing to be embarrassed about, my friend. I felt ashamed of myself when I first started working out and eating healthy because I felt like if I failed, I'd be an even bigger loser than I felt like and I'd just have another failure under my belt. But the fact that I tried instead of staying on the couch with my bag of chips and coke meant that I was succeeding. Not trying is failure. Anything above not trying gets you closer to success. So I guess my advice would be to get checked out and figure out your motivators. What's driving you do get healthy and fit? Once you figure it out, it becomes a little easier. It gives you something to grip onto to pull yourself through the pain. Good luck with everything, and keep us updated

Hi Valkyrie, thank you for reading and taking the time to respond. I would love to take a huge leap like you did with moving so far away. We have planned it so many times, but I think it was just a fantasy. I don't want to separate the kids from their relatives. I'm working on implementing the advice given here, especially learning to take things one day at a time and focusing on what can be done that day. Good things don't happen overnight. I've talked about it to other people on here before, the concept of small changes leading to something bigger. The art of Kaizen, I believe it's called. I love it, but it's hard to make it work or someone like me who's mind and energy is torn in so many directions. I have to harness all that scattered energy into one path and make it work. Thanks again for coming around.

So weird; your post has confirmed exactly what I've been struggling with my whole life. I'm am wildly passionate about so many things that I just can't focus on one thing. I feel so unfulfilled all the time (except for with my kids-- that's one thing I do have. Wouldn't change it for anything), but I know I have so much to offer. I've done much research on making writing a profession, and I know it's hard to do so. It'll take much time and much luck, but it doesn't deter me. It only makes me want it more. Thanks very much for the resource. I feel a little better knowing that I'm not alone in being so overwhelmed.

That's great news! Enjoy your pain-free day. Hopefully it stays like that.

Don't stress about it. It happens to all of us. Consistency is key. One bad meal won't make you fat. Just like one good meal won't make you lose weight or get ripped lol Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward. Good luck!

Hey Jax, Congrats on your recent respawn. From what you've shared, you're definitely improving. Use that momentum to keep you going. Kicking the soda habit is hard, but awesome to do. Good luck on your journey.

Thanks very much for the reply, Companion. I appreciate your straight-forwardness. My worrying about others thinking I'm a failure is something I'm really trying to work on. It's a huge problem I have that stems from a lot of stuff from childhood, and I'd like to get rid of it. What you said about people actually thinking about me more infrequently than I believe helps. I know for a fact that my some of my family talks behind my back about my life choices, but I try to stop worrying about it. I have never questioned the motives behind my goals, but I would like to say that they are born from my desire to help people and do good in the world. Yeah, sure, there's part of me that just wants respect and admiration. But I'm confident that it's not my only motive. I'm getting my license in January, so this will be good for me. Can't afford a vehicle yet, but I live in the city right now so it's not as big of an issue. Working on that part, too. I'm currently developing graphics and content for the site I want to create. That will hopefully be launched in January. I'm in the process of editing my latest novel, as well, one which I hope to find an agent to represent. And as far as kids go, we are good with 2. We're going to keep it that way. I'll look into the Physical Therapy Assistant program you mentioned. Thanks again for the comments. Hey Sweed, thanks for the comment. I didn't know that there were alternatives, so I'll definitely be looking into this.

Great job man, sounds like you are doing really well. You seem to be enjoying all of it too, which is super important. I'll definitely be following along with your journey.