lucky fire dragon

No, that's perfectly realistic and no tendency for extremes whatsoever, isn't it? I phrased it like this on purpose to uncloak my silly brain on this. Thanks! I know that and yet needed the reminder again. Oh yes, that is what they meant, but I think the coach did not want to scare me and said it to cushion the threat he doesn't know me very well yet I was and am excited to tackle some weights and if anything a bit disappointed that he didn't trust me on the free barbell squat yet. But that's okay, the version he showed me, I can push my feet really well into the angled platform and focus on training my left leg more, which is the significantly weaker one according to that scale thingy. And it's so funny really, because I asked hubby and my weights were really not that much less compared to his (insert smug grin here) But I mustn't get too cocky here. He will probably up his loads soon. His biggest challenge was posture and the coach says, that his tennis playing is to blame for that. They kept deloading until he could focus on form entirely and I guess he will get a feel for it soon enough and then he can lift a lot more over time. I hope so, because as cool as it was for me it was a bit embarrassing for him, poor dude. It didn't help that the gym was full of super fit people that morning. Right behind him a guy was doing very smooth muscle ups on the pull up bar with burpees in between... and on the other side this dude who lifted big weights as if it was a warm up... poor hubby. BUT it's all motivation I watched the muscle ups and thought "goals" haha

life making decisions for you, and it sounds nice enough with a free stay at a 5 star hotel Oh, I better put this somewhere I see it often!! Thank you for summing it up so nicely. You're so funny, Dan you call the challenge a failure and then you list all these major wins! I remember you being a bit on the (very) strict side of challenges like this. Am glad you do see all those wins anyhow. Nice to have you stay on and plan a new challenge as well, it's such fun reading from you and your adventures. Thanks for taking us along for the ride What kind of work will you be doing in Medellín?

Gah what is it with my typing today?! Sorry

Dangerous for phones anyhow [emoji14] Fancy a tiny pole pvp again at some stage? I haven't yet dared go at it again among all the other "suck it up" things and have a suspicion that it could run better and more fun than expected (I know this contradicts itself now because with ghat I am twisted the expectation ...) anyhow knowing you are playing on it helps

Woot on progress and yay on what sounds like an awesome session Geez it's dangerous walking in Finnland this time of year. Well done

Those sceneries are stunning!!! But I want to know most where the clips of the pole flows are?? Wanna see those pretty please Your smart adult game is getting ever more shiny in strength I really like your climbing approach

So now that I did that video thing I was fully pumped to be my absolute rocking best at work from now on for the rest of my life aaaaaand of course this did not last all too long. Well, I had a productive hour this morning before our "date" at the gym, but I had such high hopes on responses from my message last night that I was accordingly deflated when none has come as yet. It's silly I know. There were a few kind messages from people who said they might come at a later time in the year, or who just used it as a reminder to let me know how much I have helped them this far and that they are doing well enough on their own. Which is very sweet of them to take the time to write to me. But sadly no one has taken up the special price offer yet and booked anything. And instead of just letting it go for now, continuing on things I can and should do, I obsessed about it and did zilch :/ On the other hand I often had lame Mondays after productive Sundays, so now I decided to not make too big a deal of it, give myself the rest of the day off and do a few household things instead. Tomorrow morning is clear of appointments and I can tackle things afresh then. Maybe even rekindle some excitement for it ... that would be great Good news is, I went to the gym and got a training plan set up, yay No more circuit training for a while, it'll be weights and the cool thing is that with weights progress can be tracked so nicely Funny thing is: hubby got a plan made too and I let him go first while riding one of the stationary bikes and watching him working along. It's so nice to watch others work hard isn't it Anyway, coach and him suddenly look over to me, pointing and smiling mischievously and I am wondering what's going on. Turns out, they decided I get the same plan, just with "lady adjustments" whooops Actually I didn't mind, because it's all strength training and that is my main goal at the moment anyway. AND I must have a peek at hubby's plan again, but I think I actually don't lift that much less or at least with some of the exercises. The lateral lifts I can't lift much at all Training consists of 3x12 weighted squats at this set up where the weight rests padded on your shoulders and you place your feet on a platform at a diagonal angle in front of you, which gives the squat a nice big range of movement and interesting angle. Can't remember what weight I had, will look it up next time. Just know that it's enough to make the 12 reps hard in the third set coach says this set up guides the movement safely until we are ready for the barbell squats. 3x12 bent over rows with the barbell (10kg in weights, not sure what the bar weighs) 3x12 lateral arm raises with dumbbells (3kg per hand, this is sooooo hard for me!) 3x12 bicep curls with dumbbells (5kg each hand going well) 3x12 standing lat pulldowns at the cable machine (I think it's 10kg, but must look again) 3x12 bench presses again at a machine that guides the movement somewhat and can't have any accidents (currently at 8,75 kg each side) and 3 combined sets of 14 mountain climbers followed by 14 russian twists with a 4kg medicine ball (now there is no feet on the floor anymore ) All in all it felt good, like challenging enough but not exhausting me. Maybe I set the weights too easy, but I'd rather start with less and be able to do it all in good form, and for that it feels right. Headstand training afterwards went beautiful!!! I held a full minute and only came down, because hubby tired with filming There is still no way to rise into the forearm headstand without kicking off the floor, but from tripod it is getting better and better. So chuffed about this. I even tried some crow afterwards, how adventurous am I today and for a brief millisecond I had it. No footage of it though, so you might not believe me. I know, I'll have to go again... aaaaaaaand I went onto that scale thingy again and have lost 2,1 kg since October with 1,9 of it being fat and only 0,2 of it being muscle tissue, woot woot. I am not listed under the skinny fat anymore, but fall into "standard, healthy" now My body fat percentage went down 1,2 % strangely my water percentage in the muscle tissue is still too low, despite all the water I so consistently took in over the last 3 months not sure how to change that, but will make sure I at least keep up the intake I have. It seems there is too much water in other tissue and I am not sure how to shift that to the right places?? All a mystery to me, but nothing majorly important I think.

You were amazing on this during NaNo weren't you? Yes, I guess that is the way to go and often my hesitance grows huger the longer I haven't been at something. Like when I had not worked out for several weeks, then months, it seemed a huge feat to tackle any workout at all, now I am excited for the next training session. After yesterdays "boss battle" on the newsletter and things, I happily updated stuff on the website that I should have tackled long ago and for some reason could not bring myself to do it. I have the distinct impression that big time gaps are my downfall in many areas and I simply have to break the barrier regularly enough. Maybe now that the workout habit seems relatively solid, I can tackle the work habit again without losing the workout and family things (which is what usually happened during productive work times in the past) Thank you That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it... I know!! Maybe I can bug my new text helper with it after the website and stuff I have other volunteers, but they adore all my meditations and I feel they might not cast critically enough and eye over. While it's nice to be loved, I do want someone helping me, who isn't shy to point out weak spots and hopefully give clues for improvements. Of course, that would be the ideal thing. Alas they don't come cheap and for something that I am not even sure will bring any money, my budget is too tight to spend any on it right now. Oh well, I have to write the whole thing first anyway, so let's see what comes up by then Thank you

as always completely in awe with your strength and control your sequences are coming along so beautifully!!

Oh that seems very familiar to me as well. Maybe it goes for women too Elize, I am so thrilled to read about the lovely outing you had with your neighbors and how well it seems to have matched for both the men and you women. Isn't that one of those beautiful gifts from God in a sudden unexpected way? I do understand what the lady of the Moms retreat is getting at with reigning in complaining, but you are in no way wallowing or drowning, you really needed someone to hear you and help you acknowledge that it's okay to feel overwhelmed at times. That can be invaluable! You sound so much more at ease in many big ways, it's a treat to read And with B going through his own thoughts on the immigration option, you are not so along anymore on it either, which takes a lot of pressure off. Talking about that: I feel you will need an ally for those game get-togethers otherwise chances really are, you end up with too much leadership and responsibility, just because it's convenient for the other parents. Is there anyone whom you could approach, who could be interested in initiating it together with you and brainstorming with you how to organize it in the best way for all? Also, wow - how often have you moved life?! It's hard to keep any lasting friendships when unrooted so often, no wonder you are careful in building them up at all. On the other hand that means you often had to connect to a whole new community and some friendships form quick and deep, like it could possibly happen with your neighbor or completely elsewhere too. I for one am glad to know that we get to stay in touch with you no matter where in the world you decide to live What a wonderful weekend all in all (well apart from your mils bank problems, I am really sorry for her). Have you been to that beautiful bird place already or is that still happening? I loved reading about that cuddling moment with your boy, so precious these times!!

sounds like a most heavenly weekend Soon soon now, is it? Am so excited for you!!! Did you get hold of your future work place about the contract? Hope you have a fabulous week where things fall fine into place for you!

So I did the thing again! seems to become a new pattern After some time of procrastination this afternoon I finally sucked it up and did that video message and uploaded it onto youtube. Embedded on my website, in a newsletter, created a special offer to go along with it (not mentioned in video though as I want to keep the video up as a general intro on my retreat work) and sent it all out I'll call it my adventure thing for the day as well, because it took some guts for sure and was something new that I had not done before. Will sleep very well tonight And tomorrow I can finally catch up on all your awesome threads again, squeeeee Also, 36h of fasting done again, woot woot and this morning my weight was down to 68,4 kg which is 3,5 kg less compared to beginning of December and less than I have had in a long time. I am thrilled about it. There was a time when I was quite unhappy about 68kg but right now it's gold to me funny how relative things often are.

Thanks. You have a very clear perception and focused awareness of things, so I appreciate your input a lot! You're absolutely right on that! And for a while I had stopped libraries and the like, because they were either flooded with brochures already or refused to take any in order to avoid the floods... but now that you mention it, there is a new library in the neighbor town which is really nice and might have some options on this. The gym is clear of any ads from whoever, but I want to approach the owner sometime and ask, if there could be any interest in maybe offering a workshop to be held there. I know a yoga teacher who teaches at gyms on the side and will have her over for a massage soon, am planning to ask her how she approached that and what I could look out for when I discuss offers with gym owners. Also at the company where I am teaching meditation in February, I'll place out some ads and hope it spreads from there. With interest in the courses there so high, who knows? I actually have that, with an impressive total of 2 meditations uploaded over 3 years been on my list to add to that for a long time and I keep forgetting ... or procrastinating, not sure why. Well, I did the video message thing, woot woot and that is now up there, so I better add some other content again as well Ugh that book you remember perfectly correct but it's hard. I don't know - guiding the actual meditations comes a lot easier than putting them on paper. I have a lot of text about my approach to meditation as well, what elements I use, why and how people benefit from them, but it's all quite mixed up still, no structure and I second guess them very much when I reread them. At some stage I started a book on breath meditations with the title "Breath of Kindness" and worked passionately on it, only for it to get drowned among daily things and then doubts again as well and now I am both keen to tackle those projects again and hesitant at the same time. Thank you, Annyshay I remember you enjoying the started project and that encouraged me a lot. They really are!! They do bring mice and birds into the house at times, but then again they seem devoid of any senses to find them again. Makes me wonder... and setting them loose in the kitchen didn't help a thing. Therefor the trap. Better for the mouse anyway I had mixed feelings about the cats getting him/her. Oh gosh, I would have squealed the house down I guess poor dogs

Pic of our mousy guest. Check the cute button eyes. Exactly like im the comics [emoji23]

Yip That will be my reward after drafting and sending the newsletter out

Am running behind on updates and can't remember anymore what was all there but overall I am doing ok. Today was the first part of the retreat marketing boss battle. Tomorrow will be part 2 when I make it main content of my newsletter. I usually prefer to write about something inspiring or offer a meditation for free instead of using it for advertisement only - I mean people use their precious time to read it, they should get something out of it other than "give me your money" - but several people assured me that informing about the changes in my work over the last few years is entirely justified and so I will do just that. With hopefully something inspiring mixed in Fasting is going fine. The last two days my weight started going up slightly but I am not worried about that, in fact it surprised me that it came so late. Now I am in the middle of another 36 hour fast and curious to see what tomorrow will be like. Glad to have gotten that workout in yesterday, even though it was a slightly shorter and easier one than normal due to the cold still slowing me down. Skipped the headstand and did not push that heavy sledge either for instance. Managed 8 squats with the barbell though, hah, 30kg. Yesterday I finally put up a mouse trap for the suspected "roomie" in our kitchen, who was hiding extremely well but left very definite droppings and bitten left overs right next to the waste bin under the sink. This morning the poor thing sat terrified in the trap. So youngest and me went for a long walk to the fields and found a lovely place near woods and a barn with some straw piled in and released him/her there. Youngest was very happy with us doing it this way. She has a huge heart for any animal and was worried about our cats catching the mouse, but no worries there, our cats had proven useless Other than that nothing exciting to report really. The wonky renegade rows were yesterday's adventure thing the mouse today and I am busy getting a lot of stuff done for work and household, alternating with delicious time outs, listening to Sherlock Holmes while coloring in pictures on my kindle and feasting when I am not fasting

Good news!! I got an ally for this too Helpers all around it seems nowadays, I like it I was trying out renegade rows at the gym thinking I must include my upper back a bit more and the owner came running to correct my form didn't realize I was that off, but am very comforted by him being so attentive and he was real nice about it as well. Anyway it made me ask him about some of the options afterwards and also how much it would cost for him to create an individual training plan for me and it turns out, that is included in our membership to start with! How cool is that?! So now both hubby and me have an appointment for Monday morning, when the coach will put together a routine with and for each of us and guide us through each exercise to make sure our form is correct. I am soooo excited!! This will get me nicely strong for sure Such a good choice!!

that is a very kind explanation so I like it a lot am afraid it also has to do with a little lack of clarity in phrasing though or maybe some mental block, but in any case I WILL get there Cool, doesn't that confirm how natural it is? We are definitely sleeping better and the lower back pain I sometimes had during my morning meditations is completely gone, woot woot Thanks for the hugs and empathy. I nearly cried, but am happy for her at the same time as she works as a cook 5 days a week, sometimes 6 and on the other day goes cleaning, so this means she might actually have a day off. She could afford it, just didn't want to drop us because when she came to Germany 5 or 6 years ago, we were among the first to give her a job. Am thinking I might split it up over several days, like cleaning the bathrooms twice a week (which they would have needed already, but I never did that second time, so they only got cleaned once a week, when our "rescue angel" came and cleaning the floors on other days, maybe even spread over two days a week, and uncluttering / deep cleaning a small area as I go along... will have to see how much reality comes from all the enthusiastic planning Shame, I am sorry to hear that, you have so much on your hands already!! At least we are getting movement in that way, so you could deload your workouts on those days Thank youuuuu I'm sure you're right on this. That's what I suspect as well and I was just venting my frustration a bit, sorry for that. That is very kind of you and that question is a valid one. Now that you ask I am embarrassed how obvious it is how little I do There is my website and I have a newsletter list of about 300 people whom I send a newsletter to once a month. About half of them actually read it and I am told that is a good quota, which seems weird to me but there it is. I also get positive feedback on those newsletters regularly, but the list is not growing really and apart from that I have nothing else right now. I used to lie out postcard size ads for my retreats at a few places like the local bookstore that specializes in spirituality and therefor has matching clientele, but I need to reprint and am in analysis paralysis again about the phrasing of the text on it. Found an alternative though, hah! One of my clients drafts texts for the websites of businesses (as part of a complete web design package) and I have now reached out to her and she is very happy to help me re-phrase the parts of my website that I feel need less fluffy language and help me with the ad phrasing as well, yay In exchange I will treat her for the things she would have come for anyway and tadaa win-win. I am sooooo happy for that help, I can't even tell you. Also the venue where I am hosting the retreat offered to list my event on their website. For anyone signing on through them they receive a 10% commission of the course fee, which I am very happy to pay them. I sucked it up today and sent a text and pic to them and updated the retreat information on my website as well in a way that feels somewhat clearer to me. It's a work in progress though as it is still way too long in text (the description on my own website, the one I sent to them is short enough). But now I have an ally and the best thing is, she has attended one of those retreats before, so she knows exactly what they entail. Soso. The bath was definitely good, but the cold is still dragging on, meh. My head is a lot better by now and I got a workout in yesterday, but my voice is still strained and the cough is persistent. Patience seems to be needed sigh

aaaaaand that is why I said impressive that's some formidable opponent you have there!! Wish I could help, but even if I hadn't already chosen ship, my contributions wouldn't even make a dent here, sorry

Your steaks look wonderful and I love how consistent you are on the toe touching. Way to go!! Maybe you could find a tiny goal for working out as well? The stretching seems small enough to be doable often enough. That helps immensly. You might have planned more than what you are getting done ( oh how familiar that is to me lol and I guess to many of us) but despite life's fluctuations you are getting a lot done as is and I love how determined your spirit stays up. Again: way to go Calibre! Keep it coming Also yay on future challenge plans It might be the new you... how exciting is that Oh and congrats on the eyes being better even! How fantastic

Impressive is the word I would use. Go Manarelle go!! PS why aren't your points showing or am I missing something?

Added a small contribution as well. Am not going that strong this week but might be able to add a few more points over the weekend

You might call it a terrible week but in all honesty I still see a lot of fun and success here. As you say life is rarely 100% perfect. I love the shift of work mood! It makes such a difference in overall life satisfaction. Pah cleaning is overrated. Just call it an enhanced parcour line that should make up for it just fine

Here you can see the happy dip after the 36h fast

Short updates so far: Monday: - meditation went well - fasting was more than planned and as it feels good, I call it a happy accident - suck it up action was looking into the logistics for my upcoming silent retreat end of April and it triggered quite a load of stress as I am lacking participants, but the venue is counting on me coming. If I have to cancel it, I should do so soon, while cancellation fee is still manageable, but it would be very sad for me to cancel and I should probably just get more advertising out. In case you haven't noticed yet, I am not very good at selling my expertise, so I hate that part and do too little on it. I keep hoping that word of mouth will do it for me, but it doesn't. People who attended so far always loved it and often tell me months later how they are still benefiting from it, so I don't understand why they don't send their friends, but then again there are so many offers of events out there, people probably don't even have time. idk Decided uncountable times that day, to not let myself wallow in it but face it and rise to the challenge, and by seeing how hard that is I can seel how needed it is and how much I have to grow in this regard still. I chatted to a friend who is a good business person and knows me well enough and asked for his advice. He recommended I record a video message and sent it out to my list, with a special offer for those who sign up within the next 10 days and juice it up by listing all the benefits people get out of it. I thought, great I'll do that, only to come down with a proper cold and my voice is, well, not the sexiest at the moment sooooooo maybe no video message right now Not sure if I somehow created that to get around the video message as I have very mixed feelings around it. Gaaaah, why is marketing so hard?! - fun thing was shifting the mattress finally onto the floor as mentioned before and so far we both really like it. Youngest now thinks, she has such a weird family she is the only one sleeping in a bed now (her brother prefers the mattress on the floor as well) and says it's so awkward because she knows no one else who sleeps on the floor. Teenage problems for real, poor her no training yet as I went instead to get some errands done and buy a new vacuum cleaner to replace the broken one among other things ------------------ Tuesday: - meditation was tricky as my mind was all over the place about the retreat planning - fasting came easy due to the cold - suck it up action was doing some calls and emails that had been waiting, plus getting my planned work done despite feeling quite under the weather. It's mostly throat and chest that are infected, with some dull feeling in the head as well and overall fatigue, but as the day went on, I ended up doing everything I had planned, except my workout. So yay on that I did not have the energy to come up with a juice newsletter about the retreat just yet, meh - fun thing was tackling some embroidery. I had started on a dragon shape long ago and picked it up only to decide I had made the crosses to far across (it was going to end up huge!) and that it will look much better more condensed, so I spent the whole evening undoing it but hey, I had needle and thread in my hands! Now I only need to decide if I still want to that same dragon or rather something else and then what to do with the cloth afterwards (meaning practical use) and am running a slight risk of decision paralysis still no training ----------------- Wednesday (today, so just started) New day new dawn Meditation was very distracted, only the group meditation had me focus properly. But a win was that at 4am I thought surely this cold gives me an excuse to lie in and do it later... instead I asked myself if that was the inertia loving body-mind talking here or conscious, free-will mind. The answer was pretty clear, so I decided I got this and I won't let the lazy habits of my body run my life and that I'd probably get more rejuvenation out of my meditation than out of the crappy dream sleep that was likely to follow at this time in the morning anyway. Hah! And it did rejuvenate, too, despite all the thoughts being all over the place (yeah I know this battle is far from over, but there too I won't give up and just grow stronger until I have some control over my mind as well) So all in all I count that as one of those wins that seem smaller and are quicker forgotten than they deserve. My fun thing for today might be a salt bath with vigorous rubbing to get my circulation flowing and then napping for an hour, hoping it will get me sweating all the illness out and get better quicker. Later I have the lady coming, who cleans for us once a week and will have to suck it up and tell her, we will have to let her go Our budget is just too tight at the moment and while hubby always said that is the wrong place to cut down on, even he could see that if we put the money aside that we pay her, it would actually go a long way towards our summer holiday with the kids and that is a wonderful motivation to do the cleaning ourselves. If I had more work, we'd have the budget, but as it is at the moment, I have more time than money and then it seems silly to pay someone for something I can do myself. We will all miss her though, and not just for the cleaning, she is a most wonderful woman. Oh, on the work front there are some good news as well!! Yesterday the company contacted me, where I am scheduled to teach meditation for a course of 4 weeks next month and so many of their employees signed up for it, we have to divide them into 2 groups, meaning I get to work twice as much there as planned, squeeeeeee I held an introductory workshop at their firm in autumn last year and they obviously liked it well enough Now I am a bit nervous and very, very excited!