If you're reading this then I'll go ahead and thank you for spending these moments to read this. We'll for starters I guess I'll provide you with some Intel for my reasoning of joining this rebellion. I will warn you i may jump around thoughts although the idea should stay the same. I hope. Lately I've been losing a large mount of motivation to do anything. I used to be in great shape....but that was a few years ago. Then school kicked in. In the beginning I presumed that getting a job would provide me with the money for me to discover new things until I realized how it sucks out your free time too. I see all these people on here, on the internet, movies, shows, books, etc who are great and have self-taught themselves so many great things. They have beaten their demons and achieved their goals but I'm having issues. I can't seem to find the motivation I need without something coming up to ruin it. Mt dream is to travel the world and learn many martial arts, languages, etc. But for now I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere in Georgia. I've never been good at self teaching and I've always needed friends to help me but nobody I know has the same interest/motivation to do anything with me. Places that teach everything I want to learn are hours away. The only thing I have close to me besides school is a dairy queen. I have realized I need help to achieve my goals but no one is willing, honestly all my friends are not very active or fit. Lately I havent been either. I sleep all day. I'm falling behind in school and begining to fail. I've lost all motivation and I'm hoping to find people here who can help me. Just to talk to help motivate/compete with. New friends to make I guess. I'm shy, I have little confidence in my abilities, I know they say "I'm only a teenager, I shouldn't worry, things aren't all bad, life will get better blah blah" but with a recent family friend's death and other events happening I've been getting worse. Another thing is that i want to join the SF out of highschool and so I'm fearful I won't make it back from war, so my fear of death keeps me from thinking of the future and now im only worrying about now. So besides all my bitching and complaining, the point is I'm looking for new friends who can motivate me. Compete with me. Just all around help me. On a side note, my goals are finally getting around top actually beginning to train in parkour, Martial arts, and bodyweight exercises. I began a year ago and lost motivation of course. I chose assassin (partially because of Assassin's Creed and The Night Angel Series by Brent Weeks. Hint my name) but because of their all around fitness,strength, agility, etc. Plus it fits in with the freerunning, parkour, and martial arts training I hope to achieve. We'll it's a lot so if you took the time read this maybe partially pointless lengthy post then thank you.
