Renate

Update - I started calorie tracking and took it day by day as per @Epsilonte's suggestion but I kept coming back because I saw it as partial research for my food tracker database By day 5 the foods I was eating started repeating, so today I am taking a break. Maybe the weekend is a good time to eat intuitively based on the insights you gained through the week. Maybe there will be other supermarket deals next week and I will get motivated again to track because there will be new entries for the database (Fun fact: The Netherlands is a very much deal motivated demography when it comes to buying groceries. They only believe something is cheap is it's a deal. Even when it has been artificially blown up beforehand I'm lucky my friends are just as sticklers/discount hunters who enjoy comparing data and watching money or the amount I like to talk about that sort of stuff increasing since my decrease in income would have been annoying I might enjoy a job at the municipality's spending coaching but I should probably chill my adhd and focus on things I studied for.)

Raise awareness about the variety within paladins!! I want to write a story about this being some character's thing now Maybe getting an eyebrow lift from the good lawful paladins until they catch on Can paladins go (deep) undercover just to re-emerge and find their way back into regular society again?? I'll write it down because it'll be the second time I lose an idea for a fiction that I'm super excited to write about because I got it at an inconvenient time Thanks guys!!

sigh I have given up on pointing out the sardonic reality/hilarity of people who discriminate, especially when they are discriminated against just as well. If there is someone to protect, I protect. If not, I just laugh at the person exhibiting the contempt and pity them for the lack of overview and insight into systemic issues likely hinders them in other aspects of their lives where their (real or imagined) silver spoon cannot carry them as well.

starry eyes OooooOoooo a shiny new tool! I've been snowed under Motion ads which immediately gives me an allergic reaction to whatever is advertised because "nothing can be that good if it needs that much of advertising" in my brain. Though maybe that is less true every time another person who has grown up with flashy short vids and influencers (hidden and suggestive advertisement) gets their own job / income to spend, and you need to be willing to invest in ads to grab their attention? A lot of words to say I am putting Structured on my To Try list Thanks! P.S. - I'm (maybe? sort of? indirectly? it works as a seguey) critisizing other people's attention span yet I cannot seem to say with certainty I cannot find if you have written the rest of your theme days anywhere? Curious to see how the experiment goes and your thoughts, regardless. I kinda love the "just do whatever is in front of you, as fast as possible" but sometimes I get a bit bitchy towards myself when something goes wrong and I could have prevented it with planning (in theory) Of course, if said plan that could have prevented it is so detailed and convulated it's not practicable, that's a fallacy, and I shouldn't bitch to myself about something like that. Why waste energy being bitchy to yourself when you can be doing fun things instead.

I'm so so so sorry this is happening Sending positive energy and prayers (Feels a bit misplaced here but I loved reading about the lore Lawful does not mean rigid, of course Even though the movies like to paint the good guys as boring and impractical while the villains tend to be all sexy and daring. How sexy is it to be mischivious enough to bend the law from what it is to what it should be AND do good intentionally, not just as a sidequest )

Wow! I took 2 short walks yesterday and keeping my stricter IBS regime, drinking water, and seriously I'm back down to 69, maybe even 68,8 but whose counting grams (I sometimes do because I tend to round up to not accidentally overestimate but I'm starting to think this scale is pretty good.) Let's see what happens without hyperfocusing on weight. Mobility is still more important and I'm starting to stretch while brushing my teeth on top of when I wake up I'm going to kick this goal in the butt like a fraudster piping millions unnoticed via microtransactions muahaha (except with getting movement in) This insight deserved an uncharacteristic lay-out flip to central alignment EDIT at around 16:00 - I just took a longer fast-paced walk in case it rains later when I want to take my second in between pomodoros or task switching walks it feels pretty great honestly I've missed moving outside. I walked my doggy a lot at my last living space (it becomes a task switching walk if I Get really into a longer project/task and lose track of time) P.S. - is there going to be a theme to this challenge where I find all the fun gifs of women in trench coats walking confidently?

I'm at: I made a sort-of-swatch by coloring in a picture. Bit sad the pencils don't have codes like my wax pastels (or crayons, if you want to be refined ) And sort of starting to warm up to the idea of using pencils for colorful art. They pop less and its harder to fill in the tooths of the paper (uh, all the holes, you know, so there are no white bits left?) But we shall see if I will end up using them a lot or will simply cheat with the watercolour wax pastels and a fillable brush, which is a bit less risky because there are no glasses to accidentally spill and such. Yeah, I get it.

Wow I just found a crazy article Thanks! yeah, that might be a good idea! Thanks

It's really interesting reading things after a few Big Life Events, when views change or knowledge broadens or whatever other perspective shifts happen in the background (or consciously). I love that for you!! Aristotle is a bit weird, being both what we would consider a scientist nowadays, but also having the limited knowledge of astronomy and (Earhtly) natural phenomena compared to what "we" "know" today. I don't know if that is why you prefer other classical works, but that is why I personally tend towards literature about the classical thoughts and Ideas as well (still, even though if you'd look at my threads I'm more in a (christian) theological groove right now) Good luck with your re-newed journey!! My mom gifted me a little baby sister when I was 21, so I consciously saw all of her phases as an adult. and somewhere along age 7 and 9 is when I began seeing her as an independent little human as well. I hope that gives you and your wife some much needed you-time Great job with getting there!!

Challenge wise.... I am a bit bummed the balcony is still off-limits even after I offered to do the upkeep regularly (would have given me an excuse to be there and maybe draw a little, or maybe even garden some, but it's mostly an off-limits zone. (Always has been, as I understand from the guys - even when they were little, so it's nothing personal. Just one of many quirks. C'est la vie.) I've been pretty consistent with Beat saber! but I don't feel like it burns that many calories in the 30-60 minutes that my eyes can take the screen. (Although I have no need for glasses, my eyes have always been special snowflakes and have kept from reaching my full potential as an e-girl, I mean, REAL GAMER ) I also don't feel like I have eaten enough to keep up my weight since I moved in March (the news that I'll have to find a different place on my social benefit within 3 months was one way to make me want to eat my whole cupboard and gain back the kgs I had lost around September 2024). I know tracking my kcal would be the easiest way to know for sure but that feels like a huge daily task right now I'm happy I have gotten to a point where stretching is my default thing besides praying right when I wake up, but it's not really... Targetted. I have also stopped randomly stretching throughout the day since spending my sis' birthday at my mother's Not sure what to do about all of this , for now, I will just keep showing up in here (and drink water, and breathe) and hopefully something will click Soon !

The distributor/mail man must have gotten distracted by rakija For a totally different topic! I got a super good deal on royal talens (who bought the bruynzeel line) coloring pencils! I was hesitantly looking for them (even though I find coloring pencils complicated to work with) because everything in this house has risk of being damaged ... (And nope, I'm not allowed a corner for myself :p) I was playing around with the idea of getting some graphite and going outside but before I settled on some concepts, I found these! 58 colors and an HB and a 2B pencil for 15 euros instead of 23,50 (and an eraser and sharpener, which I don't need, but that makes it easy to take with you when travelling which is cool (sometimes I get creative ideas in hotel rooms)) I checked prices online and it seems that 20-25 is the general price such sets go by so very happy. I'll post something ... once I have it The metallic ones are surprisingly shiny compared to what I expected, and color a lot smoother than the metallic coloring pencils I've tried before Good newssss

I hope, good because I went through an even worse phase for the photo for my driver's licence (I was in protest against make-up, with a short bob, under-cut and red hair) I looked quite awesome IRL but dutch driver's licence photos are black and white so a little eyeliner would not have hurt... But ah, I was fighting different battles then ___ I gained back a kilo at my mother's because there was EXTRA cake and candy for the birthday and I am weak willed thought that all the swimming and playing we did would be enough to break even. But no. I am slightly disappointed but realistically I did not expect to lose any weight during the job application and exam process so... I shall view that short timed win as a little blessing and relief from the stress of needing to look for new clothing within a budget. (I usually just get expensive long-lasting stuff and call it a day. But I tended not to fluctuate a lot in the past so... I'm getting used to the new reality) C'est la vie! Today a new wave of hot days started, so I cannot determine if my feeling a little woozy is because of that, or the whiplash of trauma triggers, or the medication. Either way I am confident enough after my Dr's appointment to up the dose to 300 mg starting tomorrow ! Fingers crossed, water bottle and healthy meals and exercise planned

The women in my family (or maybe most of middle class Eastern Europe?) have the habit to go to the cosmetician & hairdresser's before a passport photo stint as you'll see that photo for 5-10 years so I am happy with most of my others I went to the cosmetician and hairdresser in 2020 as well but I was going through hell both mentally and physically We will see what mine looks like this year as I will be doing an at home spa this time around

Decided to have a longer bike ride, on Saturday, and gave my legs a massage with magnesium oil after and a long hot shower Feels excellent. It is my sister's birthday today (Monday) so I am visiting. We are going swimming later Ignoring all the trauma triggers like Neo Also! Saw my old passport photo (losing validity this year, giving it to my mother to give back the public office as she is leaving for the motherland in a week) It was made in 2020. I looked SO tired and swollen and... Honestly dead in the eyes. Made a side by side collage and feeling kinda sexy in comparison. I feel kind love for my past self and pride for my in between selves that made this version today possible

Yesss I got that but I just get frustrated when we could have had a wonderful moment of pollinator celebrations if I had known the full extent of the term, which was easy to fix: by googling it. I was just lazy! Thanks for sharing, it is always wonderful to me to see what is impressive to different people Like experiencing the world multiple times Yours show both a playful and contemplative side which is so you (Which might show bias but doesn't change the fact it's true ) What pencils or other tool(s) are you using to doodle?

Exam went well, slowly debugging the effects of that day from my system Muscle ache still going strong. I will have a light bike ride, then massage my legs with magnesium tomorrow morning and have a nice hot shower.

I shall get back to you shortly! (Lots of time on my hands at the moment but I try to keep a rigid schedule – it helps with everything going on in the world right now.) Thanks!

Yeah me too! Don't mind my tendency to over-explain: I was just trying to add a different view point, but since it's so incredibly different from the way these discussions usually go I get the confusion It's why I usually stay away from these - I do not get why people would be outraged from a band member change, but if I were to make music with someone else than my own little things at home, I could not care less about fans - you either like me or you don't. You may want more of this music, but I want to start anew, and new chapters require new names. Totally different considerations But I don't care about being right either: I just love talking about music Thank you for offering your views and baring with me!

To me, remaining with a name feels more like a conscious marketing decision, is what I was saying Personally, I would want to pick a different name after a break-up, but I realise that that might mean we might get less sales because we spent X years building goodwill and loyalty and many people up with Y brand name. If we start anew, with a totally new name, that's scary. At least the old name has fan loyalty and nostalgia attached to it But maybe changing the name might lose too much to make it financially responsible ... I have no idea, so I do not judge I'm talking about bands in general - Nightwish just makes good music, so I do not get why they would not just change their name But that's just my 2 cents & inability to oversee all the emotional attachments to a name, or financial considerations that might weigh into it

Started to do my stretch breaks, but nothing mobility-related yet, I still cannot be bothered to learn new steps, apparently... Exercised for close to 3 hours yesterday The balcony hasn't been done since my MIL got the house, so it looked very apocalyptic, which is cool, but did not suit the rest of the house... I like making people happy, and figured it would be a good work-out, but did not expect THIS level of commitment. (I usually break up tasks, but I REALLY love gardening and doing make-overs, and the balcony had lots off mossy bits in all the wrong places.) My legs were SHAKING by the end of it, and my arms got a good work-out, too. I took an ibuprofen but the musle ache is super satisfying. I'm down another kg compared to last week. Family-drama vent: Oh and the meds are going great but - no amount of medication can make me into an emotionless drone I'm starting to get convinced that that is the case. I do like the fact the bupoprion doesn't give me a crash like the mefen does. It's a norepinephrine-dopamine reuptake inhibitor (NDRI), so not a stimulant like metylphenidate, and I am noticing I pick my skin less, which was the intended goal. (Even after the situation with my MIL, while normally I would have totally been looking for excuses to pick it after a situation like that.) It's usually given to patients who want to stop smoking but cannot using other methods. I'm on the lowest dose (150mg) so a placebo effect is possible. Fortunately I am not noticing any side-effects like migraines for now, so I am curious to see what will happen when we up the dose to 300mg. As for the RANT up there in the spoiler; it's only normal that my brain is resorting to rumination. I will always have my traumas, and things I feel strongly for, as an idealist and perfectionist (neurotic?) Meds just help with taking the edge off long enough for me to access my intuition + rational mind before I commit to the trauma response.

Ok, ok, I stand corrected, and I promise I'll look up a word before I comment on it next time So do you have any favourite Hollow Knight moments? (Spoilered, I haven't played it but I don't mind spoilers because I usually forget them or care more about how a character got to a point than the actual point in the story )

But aren't they pandering to the fanbase if they care about headlining festivals, too I suppose what I meant is, that they're not Nightwish anymore, but they are still awesome musicians who make good music. (To me, it would be like keeping a compound surname after a divorce and a new marriage, just because you feel like you are still Ms. Johnson-O' Connor, everyone got to know you as Mrs. Johnson- O' Connor, but you aren't... You're Mrs. Remmington, now! Or Johnson-Remmington, or whatever you like to go by, now) Re-branding gives you a new slate - but of course, loses the fans that come to see you just because they have nostalgia for the brand name... (which, in Nightwish' case is totally not the case because Floor works) Anyway, what do I know, most people who hear my take call me crazy maybe I just don't get it

Wahhh what a nuanced music discussion For me, Tarja was integral to the look and feel of Nightwish because of everything - from her vocals and how they matched with Tuomas' to her stage presence, and the band remained amazing with Floor on board, but (again, imo) they should have re-branded, pick a different name. I realise they might have lost a lot of goodwill but if you look at how The Police is just as popular as Sting, it could have worked (in my experience - I do not look at records sold, that's up to every respective band's accountant to worry about - but at the impact it has on people). I realise that is an example in which a band breaks up and the vocalist starts a solo career, but history shows that people do not view the band as the same band after a vocalist leaves, anyway... Might be a controversial view, and big talk from someone who has little knowledge on band marketing, but I stand by it - when your band entirely changes their sound, they ought to re-start... (or start up side projects, like Thom Yorke with Atoms for Peace with Flea from RHCP, The Smile, with some members of Radiohead...) Yeah, my musical taste is all over the place Either way, doing so good with your steps!!

I love it when a sunny person turns out to have the blackest of hearts Guilty, here, as well, but I have not had much success on bringing that darkness out - I just look too good in light colours! So a secret it shall remain, but luckily there are still folks finding for the cause!! Did not know you are a Floor Jansen too (maybe I haven't paid attention! (Ever heard her sing in Dutch ? ) Get it chick I'm following but the heat took me out of the running a bit with regards to... Forming coherent sentences

I get that. I love that AI levels playing fields where people do not have an entire team of experts to point them in the right direction I see a lot of wholesome posts from people in conflict with their boss solving labour law matters using chatgpt, I loved how it talked me down from telling a recruiter how utterly uninspiring he is, to use your wording But when it comes to its use for experts... It's limited. And I heard some people want to replace the need for knowledge within an organisation with it - that's just unrealistic. (I'm also mildly annoyed that the hyphen is considered an AI thing now, because it's one of my favorite punctuation characters I even have proof on paper of driving my Dutch teacher crazy with it as she was not a fan.) The companies that have always cut costs on quality might replace their employees with it that are better off doing other work anyway. The companies who have always recognised skill and expertise as an important thing will use AI to enhance their employees, taking over the menial tasks, not to replace them... Although honestly, I would much rather we just abolish capitalism instead (When we figure out what to replace it with) I mean, freedom from the machiiine!! Are you willing to bet your ... most precious item on it!! (Kidding, I just love the meme) I did NOT expect all the different pollinators! In the neighbourhood we only have bees! Lovely photos!!