Tamaska

Hey guys, sorry I vanished. I had a lot of things going on. BUT! I'm hoping to come back! I hope that's okay. ^____^ By things I mean moving, getting a new job, taking care of my mom, college... just lots of stuff.

aslkdfjasldnvoiwen indgoaidng!!! I'M LATE!!! -cue that white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland.- -Comes sliding to a halt and falls over causing a puff of dirt to float into the air.- HERE I AM!!!!!!!!! Ahem. Tamaska has arrived. Hello. Please proceed as normal.

October 28, 2015 There is something here... there is something in this cave and its watching me. I can feel its eyes on me. I can feel it watching my every move. My eyes scan the darkness quietly and warily. I can't see shit in the cave due to the murky darkness that is hardly even phased by the plethora of fluorescent glowing rocks. Even my flash light isn't very effect for getting rid of the darkness. The stupid thing only illuminates nearby areas of about 6 or 7 feet away and 4 or 5 feet wide. In a cavern that is a few hundred feet wide and long that doesn't do jack shit for the distant corners. Lucinda said the caves were dangerous, but she didn't say WHY beyond the fact that people get trapped here because she controls them. Is there something here that she can't control? The idea of some kind of monster lurking in areas I can't see makes me feel small and uneasy. Video games, stories, and movies have monsters in them.... but the hero is always armed with SOMETHING. They're always in a group, they've got help even in the darkest hours and their time of need, but... but I don't. I have a flash light and a video game system. No sword, no fancy powers, no friends to help me and the feeling of being watched just isn't going away. I can feel my anxiety mounting, the panic that has plagued me since I was young, the feeling of being powerless and unable to change the things around you. My eyes strain, my ears strain and I hold my breath for moments at a time in hopes of seeing or hearing something, anything, a clue as to what is giving me this feeling. But, I can't see or hear anything! I bite my lower lip and try to break the mounting panic. You've been through this Tamaska... you've had these panic attacks before. Stop it before you start crying and hyperventilating; that's not going to help you. No one is here to hold you and tell you things will be better. You can't... you can't do this right now. OW! I bit myself a little too hard. With a whimper I run my tongue over the area I bit. The tang of iron rich blood makes my tongue curl back, I hate that taste. Great, I bit the blood out of myself. I hope the monster or whatever it is isn't attracted to blood. I shiver and slowly get to my feet. Come on Tamaska, you're a fighter. How many books, movies and video games have you played that gave you ideas for survival? Is there a place to trap it if the thing comes towards you? Is there a place to force it to only come from one direction? What do you have to set up a trap? My mind races as I slowly pick up my blanket and wrap it around myself almost like a shield. My shivering is more than just the ever present cold, its my body reacting to the high levels of anxiety and panic I have. Go back to the room you woke up in. It's big, but there is only one way in and there is less room for whatever is watching you to get to you. If its big maybe it won't be able to come in. The hairs along the back of my neck stand on end as I move slowly towards the smaller cavern. My heart is in my throat as I move across the couple hundred feet that separate me from the smaller sanctuary. I can hear the sound of my own heartbeat thundering in my ears, the sound of my own breathing seems all too loud. Somehow, I manage to make myself walk the distance to the smaller cavern without running. I reach the back of the smaller cavern and collapse on the hard floor. My entire body is wired and full of energy as I shakily attempt to catch my breath. I need to calm down. This is just a feeling, I have no proof that something is actually in the cave with me. I need to calm down. Count to ten... count to ten... There is nothing the cave. Nothing in the cave. Nothing in the cave. Nothing in the cave. Maybe there is something in the cave..... NO! YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH! THERE IS NOTHING IN THE CAVE. God damn it... now I lost count... What's that noise? Oh god... oh god... oh god. I slowly turn to look behind me. There is a face... there is a face looking at me. There is a mother fucking face at the mouth of the cavern. My blood runs cold as I hear a clicking noise come from the creature as its head tilts side to side. The body connected to the face is gangly and matches the rock walls of the cavern. No wonder I couldn't see anything when I looked around. It blends in with the rocks. The head tilts again and the clicky noise happens again. It reminds me of the creepy tree spirits from Princess Mononoke.

That is a wonderful guide to behold. That horse face, those candy egg things. Kinder eggs? How you doin'? XD

XD The spelling bit I was serious about... I never learned how to properly spell exercise cause I say it funny. Ex-sir-size is how I pronounce it and I guess its supposed to be pronounced Ex-er-size. I also just want to look into places to go swimming, google it a few times and look around where I live at places that might be options. Make up my mind and then just go visit the places to see what its like there. Then, eventually decide if I want to add swimming once or twice a week in exchange for yoga. It's not set in concrete, its just an option I want to explore for the future. Thank you for the welcome Balidd. I appreciate the concern you and Luciana have voiced over my goals. I'm still in editing mode since I just kind of barfed up goals and ideas on the fly while I was at work. I made them complex because that's what I feel like I need to have them be so the lazy/depressed part of me that I'm trying to break isn't wiggling around looking for loop holes. Cause if I say "wake up at 10" and I set my alarm for 10, that lazy asshole part of my brain is gonna acknowledge the alarm and then go back to sleep telling myself 'You woke up, you turned off the alarm, its all good' or some whiny 'but I'm still tired' x____X I am my own worst enemy when it comes to my depressive episodes. As for the adventure tag, ohhhhh, a shiny tag thingy ma jigger. I GET TO MEET AN ADVENTURERE PERSON!!!! -freaks out and wiggles all happily.- I was wondering what guild I'd go into eventually. I'mma go lurk on them and maybe pester them as a form of saying hello. <3 Thank you Luciana and Blaidd.

My starting point? I'm working from ground zero pretty much. Any physical activity I did was at least 5 or so years ago beyond the basic walking to work and what not. Five years ago I was in high school, I did the bare minimum for PE class and did two years of wrestling. While I pushed myself for the team the changes I made to my life for those two years didn't stick. I've tried to get interested in martial arts or the gym now that I'm an adult, but nothing really fits because I always felt alone or too tired due to my depression and crazy work schedule. Now my work schedule is set concrete and specific. I work Tuesday- Saturday 3pm to 11pm. Sometimes it changes, but its mostly just adding a few extra hours to my shift to make it a 12 instead of an 8. I'm setting up a routine; get up and go to bed at a certain time. Eat three meals a day plus a snack and then do yoga once a day. Those are the things I want to start doing. Its a foot up from my daily BS of forgetting to eat, going to bed at 7am or whenever I feel like it and waking up an hour before work to get dressed and head out. Realizing I forgot to eat anything since yesterday, ordering a pizza and devouring it in my eight hour shift then not eating anything until the next day again. While it seems like a lot, its more or less just imposing rules on chaos and disorder. I know I'm not going to get 100% on everything all the time, but for the next six weeks these are the things I want to focus on because they're important to me. The schedule helps me regulate when I'm hungry, regulating when I'm hungry reminds me that I need to eat something other than pizza or a hamburger, then the yoga helps me to just have an hour to myself to stretch and unwind. Not sleeping all day has its benefits as well lol. I'll have more energy, I'll have more time and be more focused on the things I want to get done.

October 27. 2015 Woke up around 8am. Made oatmeal, rinsed some dishes and put 'em in the dish washer. Ate about a half a cup of oatmeal. Added 1/4 cup plain white sugar... Not my proudest moment but it tasted so bland!!!!! >.< klajsdflkjasd Washed my dishes and put them in the dish washer. Went back to bed around 9:30ish Woke up at 1pm Got out of bed at 1:45 Mom made me take left overs for work. Chicken and mashed taters. yum. Dressed for work and left around 2pm Returned mom's overnight reader thingy for the tests the doctors needed. Drank spice chai tea 1% milk and sugar added At work at 3pm. Doing 12hr shift x____X drank hot cocoa. MY HUMAN BODY IS SO BORING!!! I toss my pen and pad to the cavern floor. All it does is eat, sleep, answer emails and go to work! Sometimes it even goes to the bathroom! What in the shit am I doing with my life? God this is boring! I stand up and pace the cavern quietly. What the hell am I suppose to do with this information for a week? Lucinda better have a DAMN good reason for all this BS or I'm going to flip shit on the next piece of paper she sends me. Just you wait, I will use that steel and flint thingy to set it ON FIRE. Maybe I'll actually get warm that way!

Wheeeeeeeee. Tamaska is in Hillsboro, Oregon! =D Hiiii guys.

-Lurks on your post.-

LOL I only do this so extensively because I'm a procrastinator and a lazy schmuck. If I didn't do it this extensively I'd be pulling 100's everyday for eating a brownie or just looking at veggies at the super market. If you need help setting something up this extensive just let me know and I'd be happy to help you. =D

Week one day by day progress Eating: Day one:Day two:Day three:Day four:Day five:Day six:Day seven:End of week total: End of week status =D%End of week status =D% Scheduling: Day one:Day two:Day three:Day four:Day five:Day six:Day seven:End of week total: Did you do the thing?!?!?! %Did you do the thing?!?!?! % Exercise: Day one:Day two:Day three:Day four:Day five:Day six:Day seven:End of week total: So.... how are you?%So.... how are you?%

Vitamin Week one. Mineral Week one.

Thank you! <3 I appreciate this!

Exercise Learn to spell exercise: I did: A Did not: F Yoga Did it for the hour needed: A Did it part of the hour: C Did not do it at all: F Swimming place Week one: Googles is your friend. Look up places to go swimming. Did this: A Did not: F Week three: Visit these places/get more information on them. Did this: A Did not: F Week Six: Have a plan to make swimming a part of your day along with your yoga. Did this: A Did not: F

Schedule Waking up. Set an alarm. Do not go back to sleep after this alarm has gone off. Alarm is set for.... If I wake up and do not go back to sleep after this alarm has gone off: A If I go back to sleep after the alarm: C If I dismiss the alarm and miss my scheduled breakfast time: F Going to bed. Get ready for bed 1hr before bed time. Shower, jammies, brush teeth, etc. Turn off game stations and stop dicking around on my phone. Alarm is set for..... In bed by the top of the next hour and not dicking around on the phone: A Still playing on phone, but in bed: C Missed bed time, still dicking around on phone an hour after bed time: F Meals Breakfast within one-two hours after waking up. Ate all the food and it included a protein and fiber: A Did not include a fiber/protein: B Did not include either/forgot to eat: F Lunch Around noon. Ate all the food and it included a protein and fiber: A Did not include a fiber/protein: B Did not include either/forgot to eat: F Dinner Approximately 6-7pm ( depends on work) Ate all the food and it included a protein and fiber: A Did not include a fiber/protein: B Did not include either/forgot to eat: F Snack Either before lunch or before dinner. Must be healthy. ( No donuts, no candy/sugar etc) On days I work 12hr shifts it can be after dinner. Exercise hour for teh Yogaaaa. Before or after work. Take a shower afterwards. Don't be gross. Did the full workout at the scheduled time: A Did the workout, but not at the time: B Forgot the workout all together: F

Thank you insanity. =3 I'll keep editing and adding stuff as the deadline for the new 6 week challenge gets closer. Keep your eyes open. =3

Changing eating habits. Look at that pretty teal color!!!!! LETS GET STARTED! Reduce sugar. The limit for added sugar for a woman is 6 teaspoons according to the American Heart Association. ( will include link at bottom of post). So, for the next six weeks I will monitor the sugar I add to things such as tea and oatmeal. I will also monitor the sugar in things I drink or eat such as soda, hot cocoa or bread and pasta. Every day I meet the quota of 6 or less teaspoons of sugar is an A or 100%. If I go over I will take away 10% for every teaspoon I have added over. 7= 90, 8=80, 9=70 and so forth. At the end of each week I will average out my daily sugar intake and find my score for that week. This will repeat weeks 1 through 6. More Protein and fiber. I'm not counting the amount of grams and suggested servings for this just yet. If a meal I eat has a meat/meat replacement w/ protein it counts as protein, if it has veggies or a healthy grain option it counts as fiber. If something I eat has a good source of protein it will count. The goal is that each meal I eat must have a protein and a fiber with it. so, breakfast needs one of each. Lunch needs one of each and dinner needs one of each. Everyday I will need to have eaten 3 proteins and 3 fibers for an A. Should I miss one of either it is a B. If I miss 2 of either one its a C. if I miss 3 I fail. Each day's total will be added up and averaged out at the end of the week giving me my total for that week. Remember to eat. Three meals a day plus a healthy snack before lunch or before dinner is the goal. All of them counts as an A. If I miss the snack its a B, if i miss a meal its a fail. Nutrition Class. I took a beginning nutrition class in college and then I took a more condensed version of it in my medical assisting classes at another school. I will be doing research on the nutrients I need to be having for optimal health. Each week I will do research on a vitamin and mineral. I will post a list of foods that provide the said mineral and vitamin. In total I will I have 6 vitamins and 6 minerals. I'll figure out which vitamin and mineral I will be studying on Sunday at the end of the week. I will have a paragraph (4+ sentences) minimum on each vitamin and mineral. I will then list four or more food items that have the said vitamin and mineral in it. I will post links to each source I use to find this information. If I post 1 paragraph about each vitamin and mineral with the listed foods here in this forum it will count as an A. Should I miss a vitamin or a mineral it counts as a C and if I miss both it is an F. At the end of the six week challenge I will average out my total score and have my end grade. Home cooked meals. Most of the meals I eat during the week need to be from home. I've edited this section to give myself some leeway. Less take out, less pizza and what not. Once or twice every so often is fine, but not every day of the week that I have work. I'll become more strict on my dieting habits later once I've got other habits down pat.

LOL there is so much excitement here XD. I'll be sure to check out darebee in a bit. But, I've looked into the NANO thingy. I'm not sure if I'm going to participate though. But, I'm always happy to have people critique my writing or have me read there's. ^_____^

HELLO! =D The big main goal: Lose weight. My current weight is in the 280-290 ball park range. The over all goal is to drop down to 180lbs. I know 100lbs are not going to go away in six weeks though. To start on the journey of weight loss I will need to do the following. Change my eating habits. 1. Reduce sugar. 2. More protein and fiber 3. Remember to eat 4. Apply what I learned in nutrition class to my life 5. Most meals need to be homemade. Less pizza, burgers and what not. I'm currently keeping a food diary for the week leading up to the challenge. From there I will review it and seek advice on the forums and across the internet for ways to add healthier diet options to my life. This includes, but is not limited to learning what veggies supply which vitamins and minerals. Ways to cook or add those veggies to my meals so my taste buds don't die. Packing my meals for work the night before so I have no excuse to order a pizza because "Oh no, I'm working a 12hr shift and forgot to bring food". >.< Set a schedule: 1. Go to bed at a certain time 2. Wake up at a certain time 3. Have my meals and snacks at certain times 4. Make room for exercise. As it stands right now, winter is coming (pun intended) and this marks the beginning of what has habitually been the start of some of my deeper depressive episodes. I want to change this. With my depression comes long hours of sleeping, not eating properly by either not having an appetite or binge eating a few big meals that have no nutritional value what so ever. To fight this I'm going to keep myself on a schedule. No matter how shitty I feel I know that this schedule must be kept. Sleeping long hours and not eating or over eating is not going to make me feel better so it makes sense to do something that will help me feel better in the long run. Exercise: 1. Learn how to spell exercise and not need spell check to edit it for me. 2. Practice Yoga for an hour four-five days a week. 3. Find a place to go swimming. I've never learned how to spell exercise properly I always spell excersize or exersice so... that needs to change lol. I am currently 280ish pounds, running, jogging and high impact workouts are not going to be my friend at this stage of the game. I know the moment my knees or my hips start to ache from running I will immediately lose all interest in working out because I can do some amazing mental gymnastics to avoid anything I don't really want to do. So, yoga is the option I have chosen to start me on my journey of weight loss. I will also start looking for a place to go swimming. I LOVE SWIMMING and since I live in the Pacific North West outdoor swimming is not recommendable. So, AQUATIC CENTER HERE I COME! =D This is where my progress bars will be. Each week the progress bars will be updated.

October 26th, 2015 The funky dream hallucination started again. I tried to sleep around 1am or so, but I didn't get to sleep until around 4am. I woke up at 8am to take mom to her appointments. Tired, groggy and a little grouchy the entire time, it was annoying. Food I ate so far. A cranberry bagel. Liquids, 33oz of water. By the time I got home I had added one of those long toostie roll candies to the list. Around 10am I went back to sleep since it was my day off and I was tired as hell. When the physical body I'm no longer in control of goes to sleep, I'm dumped back into the cave system. I've explored it rather thoroughly, I think. There is the section where I woke up that has the toilet. Nothing interesting there. Same old same old boring rocks marbled with the glowing ones. The bigger cavern is the same. I can hear some kind of river, but I haven't been able to find it. I've walked the perimeter of this cavern and its just this unforgiving stone. I can't punch a hole in the rocks and I don't have anything to help me dig out either. I found a few places where the rock wall is uneven enough to possibly climb it. I'm not sure if I can do that though. I'm scared of heights and if I fell... Nope. Not an option right now. There is a cute little pond, lake, puddle thing, I don't know what to call it. It's about as wide as I am tall. I haven't seen anything living inside of it, but that doesn't I'm going to go swimming any time soon. Moss decorates a section of the cavern as well. Boring, spongy moss I've seen a thousand times. I quietly sit down on a busted stalagmite that has toppled to the side and quietly scan the darkness. The heavy wool blanket is useful for sitting on and keeping warm when I lay down, and I know I could read that book from my bag, survival for idiots, but the index didn't exactly indicate they had a chapter on surviving an underground terrain where you're trapped by some crazy person named Lucinda so I don't feel inclined to read it. I also haven't found a power plug for my DS or another one of those glowing orbs like the other day. Lucinda stated that there was more than person that was interested in my well being. I wonder who else is wrapped up in this crazy scheme of hers. Even if I do break out... who is going to believe me if I tell them 'Oh hey guys! I was kidnapped by something called Lucinda and she's forcing me to be a better person' Not likely. Mom warned me about running my neck to people who could lock me up in the loony bin. My physical body wakes up at 5pm, mom cooks dinner and I eat it. Baked chicken breast, steamed white rice with butter and salt as well as peas. I had two slices of potato bread with it plain. Two cups of apple juice and more water. My physical body then played around on the computer for a few hours. Another 66ozs of water as well. I find some candy and eat it. Three tootsie rolls and a tootsie pop. Nothing exciting there. Today's food eaten: 1 Cranberry bagle 4 tootsie rolls 1 tootsie pop ( sucker) 1 baked chicken breast 2 tablespoons of white steamed rice 4 tablespoons of canned peas. 1 teaspoon of butter a pinch of salt 2 slices of potato bread plain Liquid consumed: 2 large glasses of apple juice Approximately 99ozs of water. AKA 3000ml --------------------------------------------------------------------

Thanks you guys! I figure if I use my writing skills to illustrate my progress I'll be more likely to do it. All the other attempts at keeping myself accountable were very... uncreative. Soooo, starting Monday, I'll be keeping track of everything I eat, drink and do for a week. After that week we'll move along to different goals. =D I'll even take pictures of my logs to post here so it feels like someone will call me out on my BS if I lie. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In my normal messy scrawling hand writing that looks like some kind of mash up between print and cursive I jot down my thoughts on the pad of paper I found in my backpack earlier. The flashlight I have is propped up between two stalagmites that are starting to grow together. Maybe in another bajillion years they'll form one big one. I don't know, I'm not a geologist. I just remember reading something or hearing someone say that stalactites are formed by minerals being carried in water. As it drips over the centuries it leaves behind particles that slowly build up. In turn, the water falls to the cave floor creating stalagmites with the same process of mineral deposits. What they didn't mention was the ANNOYING DRIPPING NOISE THAT WAS CONSTANT! God I hate this place. It's dark, its gloomy, and believe me, I've tried plugging my 3DS into a rock... it doesn't work. This place is ridiculously stupid. With a growl I focus on the paper in my lap. There are water spots on it... I think I'm starting to hate water. I think I'm hallucinating. When I slept I watched my life unfold before my eyes. I wasn't in control. I had to watch myself do things like I was some kind of spectator. It reminded me of the spectating you can do after you die in Call of Duty when you're online doing multiplayer. I could thrash and scream all I wanted to, but it didn't change my situation. I don't think that Lucinda person was joking around about keeping me trapped here forever. I should probably do as she says, but that doesn't mean I can't find a way out of this in the mean time. Shit isn't okay. It was nice seeing my mom and my cat though... Lets get this shit show on the road. Monday October 25, 2015 The time I woke up? Pffft, I was up doing stuff when the new day started. So, I guess I'll sleep later and jot down the time I woke up then. No big deal, its not like Lucinda can punish me for my wayward sleeping habits yet. She can eat the male anatomy for all I care. Ain't nobody telling ME what to do. I hate this pen... why can't I have my nice pens? She had to give me this stupid roller ball stick pen, you know the kind you can find in packs of like 100 for a couple bucks? Yeah, that one. I hate these things. Whatever.... I'm going to sleep to see if that freaky dream happens again.

=D Thank you, Charizard. I like the way I think too sometimes! <3

Day one Entry 2 Explanations I step out of the cavern and look out into the murky darkness with a frown. Why did I get placed in this dank nasty cavern? It's cold, the lighting is crap, the rocks glow and there is nothing even remotely entertaining here. I'd kill for a pizza with a soda and some of those awesome brownie things you can get from pizzahut. Whatever. I can't get that here. I look down at the cavern flooring that is striped with the glowing rocks randomly. It's mostly flat, but there are uneven dips and shelves in the dark grey rocks. "Hello?" I shout and my voice echoes around the huge cavern before dying out. Too bad I'm not a bat I'd be able to echolocation my way out of here. I smirk at the idea before I start trudging towards the sound of running water. As I walk a soft pulsing glow catches my attention. What if that glow is like that fish down at the bottom of the ocean? The one with that dangly thing on its head that it uses to lure other fish in before it eats them!? Do those things exist in caves that aren't full of water? A frown crosses my face as I lean against a stalagmite warily. I watch the light, and it doesn't shift, it doesn't wiggle or bob at all. It's the only interesting thing in a sea of stupid rocks that jut out of the ground or hang from the ceiling. In fact, I can't really see the rocks hanging from above me because they're so far above my head. I push myself up off the rock and head towards the softly pulsing light source I see. I shiver a little bit and pull the sleeves of my hoodie down around my hands as opposed to having them pushed up to my elbows. I reach the glowing rock with little difficulty, it sits on top of another piece of paper folded up into fourths. The last one was written by that Lucinda asshat. Was this one written by the same person? I slowly reach out towards the paper and attempt to tug it out from under the glowing rock. Just because it hasn't set the paper on fire doesn't mean it can't be hot light a like bulb. I give it a yank and nothing happens. The rock holds it firmly and the paper doesn't rip at all. A frown crosses my face before I reach into my pocket where I put the flash light. It's one of those heavy industrial ones made out of metal. Way better than the dinky plastic ones. I grab the light end and poke at the rock with the other end of the flash light. It should just roll away and let me get this piece of paper. Nothing happens. The rock doesn't budge. I lean all of my weight against it and nothing happens. What in the hell!? I grumble and finally reach out to grab the rock out of frustration. The cavern lights up like its the middle of the day and a voice echoes around the place. "Hello, Tamaska. This message is for you. We want you to know that while you're on your journey you will meet many different people and go on many different adventures. The goal is to become a better person." The rock vanishes and I'm left blinking away bright colorful dots in my field of view. Great, now I can't see. This is just great. Like some kind of wonky BS video game. I snatch the paper up and sit down against the stalagmite it was pinned against. What did that voice mean by 'becoming a better person'? Am I not good enough as I am? My mom was proud of me, I was working on a career in medicine, I worked full time, I took care of my mom, I paid my taxes and I was nice to people! How dare that voice tell me I WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH! My hand balls up into a fist. Fuck that guy, person, girl, thing. I don't know. The voice was androgynous anyway. Screw them. I huff and open up the letter. Hello again Tamaska! I'm sure you're rather annoyed with this turn of events. I know I would be if I was you, and I've been watching you for a very long time, so I think I have a good grasp of the kind of person you are. Your goal is to become a better person; its not that you're NOT a good person, its just we think you can be better. I, we, us, you, want you to be mindful of the things you're doing to your body. You don't have a schedule, you sleep odd hours, your diet is shot to oblivion and we're concerned. The last time you weighed yourself you weighed 289 lbs or there abouts. It concerns me that you're this heavy. You know its not healthy to be that big for someone who is only 5'6". You've taken a nutrition class, you've seen the colorful plate diagrams from the internet and in your medical classes. We know change is hard and you're a stubborn person, so I, and a few other people have decided to force you to change. You're going to be angry, you're going to want your old food and your old habits, but right now, you CAN'T have them. For the next week starting on Monday, October 26, 2015 we're going to have you keep a food diary. Everything you eat, everything you drink is going to be written down. You have pen and paper in your bag and you will keep track of these things for us. I know, I know, it sounds like a load of shit, but this is something you HAVE to do or you're not going to leave. Remember when I told you that the caves are dangerous? It's because it traps the people in them until they do exactly what we say. This is for your own good in the long run even if you can't see it. The format we want is as follows. The date. The time you woke up. A list of the things you've eaten or drank. What you did today. The time you went to bed. Simple right? Well, I'll leave you to it Tamaska. Remember, do as we say or you stay locked in the cave for all eternity. =D Byeeee. XOXOXOXOXOXO Lucinda. I stare at the paper in my hand. We? I? Them? Us? I've been kidnapped by some freaking crazy lunatic! This isn't a game! They can't keep me here! I'll fight my way out! I WILL MAKE THEM RUE THE DAY THEY THOUGHT THEY COULD FORCE ME TO DO ANYTHING! In my fit of anger at this turn of events I attempt to shred the paper in my hands. Nothing happens. I pull and I tug, I go so far as to bite it and stomp on it, but it only gets wrinkly. WHAT IS THIS!?!?! I scream in frustration and throw the paper on the ground. "I'M NOT A TOY OR A THING TO EXPERIMENT ON!" I shout loudly into the darkness of the cave. After the echoes die to down I'm greeted with the eerie silence punctuated by the steady distant sound of running water and the plip-plip of water dripping. This is ridiculous. For hours I quietly stew in my anger.

I'd love to have an accountalbilla-buddy!!! =D We check in every so often with each other right and say if we're staying on track or we messed up? We motivate each other towards our goals yeah?