Plazmotic

Amazing! This is why it's so important to see how even failures can be successes! I'm curious, what's your concern about dating websites? Full disclosure: I met my husband on a dating website and have a few friends who met their significant others online.

Week 4 Day 2 (Tuesday) Freggies - incomplete! Had salad with lunch then completely forgot about dinner, woops. Eating window - incomplete! 9:30am to 8:30pm, one hour too long. But as far as failures go, it's a minor one! Journaling - success! Added a dream to my log and put placeholders down on my mood tracker, need to take some time to make it pretty. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Much better mood today than yesterday for some reason. Not complaining though!

I had a dream last night that for some reason I took a trip to Korea (I blame @Jlailin LOL). In this dream, I was walking through a shopping mall in Seoul and was approached to take part in a reality show where the participants would be required to sing and dance, and the winner would get their own commercial on TV. I agreed and found myself in a huge room lined with tables, almost a hundred beautiful girls inside. I watched as the coaches demonstrated the choreography and I blanched; I have a great sense of rhythm and style but I’m no good when it comes to following structured sequenced moves. Then the coaches walked us through the songs we would be singing and I blanched again; I have a good voice but the Korean words were incomprehensibly complicated. It’s weird that even in my dreams, I saw the things about myself that make me proud (my ability to casually sing and dance) turned into skills that aren’t good enough to bring me success.

I was tracking calories back when I was 32 years old (over 5 years ago) and found that I was easily exceeding 2100 calories a day without trying! And I don’t eat that badly either! 2100 is definitely an acceptable Cheat Day number. (Conversely, I remember when I was a free-wheeling single lady at the age of 27, I tried tracking my calories in an effort to gain weight and struggled to hit my required 2000 calories a day. I’d finish dinner, plug my intake into MFP, see I’d only eaten like 1800 calories, then end up scrambling through my cupboards for brownies or cereal to eat.)

I work in an environment that completely prevents any of us from storing snacks at our desks for cross-contamination reasons, but sitting next to the test kitchen does not do me any favours either. Even if I don’t bring any snacks to work, they bake them fresh at 10am and 4pm every day. D: I know that another factor that affects my munch-levels is whether I’m bored or not. When I’m busy and running around getting shit done, I don’t have time to be munchy. I’m usually bored at my job. I don't munch as munch at home, too much to do!

Rooting for you!!

Trying to stay hopeful and positive in the face of life’s relentless tomfoolery. Don’t know what else to say really. I’m just repeating to myself that it’s the hormones messing with my brain, my thoughts aren’t legitimate right now, this will clear up in a week or so.

Coffee actually increases my appetite! I find that tea works better at filling up my stomach but when I’ve got the munchies, I’m not stomach-hungry I’m mouth-hungry (if that makes any sense). I need a way to tell my brain to ignore my watering mouth. Heh, reminds me of the fastest way to demolish my appetite: stress. But I don’t want to be stressed! I am stressed today and therefore not grazing on snacks the way I usually do. This is definitely helpful! When I’ve got something to look forward to at home it gives me a distraction to focus on. Don’t have anything in mind today though, hmm. Life has gotten routine.

Week 4 Day 1 (Monday) Freggies - success! Huge success! Had salad for lunch then delicious curried cauliflower for dinner. Eating window - success! It took a lot of willpower but I stuck with the 10am to 8pm window. Exercise - incomplete! SIL was busy so I couldn’t meet up for a walk. Might have to hit up the OCR place on Wednesday. Journaling - incomplete! My husband fell asleep super early last night so I was kind of forced to go to bed early too, without touching my journaling. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Woke up in a sad mood. Something about my dreams (which weren’t even sad IMHO) set me off I think, or maybe it’s just the PMS hormones. Anyway, as icing on the cake I got some infuriating news at work this morning that is making me want to punch people in the face. I just want the world to leave me alone today but I am stuck at this stupid place instead.

I think a study just came out that once you hit the age of 35, your behaviours/values/beliefs are far more unlikely to change.

I wanted to get some feebdack feedback on what people do to curb their desire for munchies. I was SO MUNCHY just now, my mouth was watering thinking about things like chips and cheese and cocktail sausages. So I went to the test kitchen and downed 3 ham & cheese tartlets. I feel better but also like I am beholden to my basic urges and that makes me weak. Backstory: growing up I was very skinny and part of it had to do with the fact that I did not honour my hunger. I remember soon after I turned 30, I had a very basic thought that sounds obvious but was like a revelation for me: “Self, you deserve food.” After I came to that realization, I figured out that I was a grown-ass woman and if I wanted to keep a box of Golden Oreos in my desk drawer I could do the damn thing because I was a grown woman and can do whatever the hell I want.

Yaaaaas dance in that cube! For me, I get to shake my booty when I crank up my iPod during the drive home. Currently obsessed with Pick Me by I.O.I and To Heart by Fromis 9.

My old log was getting kind of ponderous so I started a new one. This will be a place for me to ramble on about my moods and plans and life-happenings, even if no one is listening. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Drinking lots of tea today, as usual it’s the lemon tea. Tired though; husband came back home last night and was snoring up a storm. *Marge Simpson noise* Have to drop by a friend’s house after work today, I forgot my wedding rings at her place over the weekend. We had a good talk when I was there. I need to start doing more stuff in my life that requires interacting with other people and strangers, I’ve been living in a too-comfortable bubble for years now. Heh, if I just gave the OCR place a chance I’d be able to kill two birds with one stone… exercise AND new people!

Same here! I was obsessed with BoA and my friends hated me for repeatedly singing ALL her songs ALL the time. I’m so glad she’s back. Alas, no. And I’m not the concert going age anymore; last one I went to (in 2013) it was so late I felt sleepy and my feet hurt and it was really loud and there were too many people. Although I don’t think it’ll ever happen, if Loona did a concert here I would go in a heartbeat.

Rain and BoA were my introductions to kpop but I veered more heavily into jpop during those years. Then in 2008 a friend’s husband introduced me to Girls Generation/SNSD and it was ALL OVER lol. Also loved Epik High, Big Bang, 2NE1, and 4minute back in the day. I tend to like girl groups a lot more than the guy groups. Currently I’m loving Red Velvet, NCT U, KARD, and Loona. CURRENT FAVE SONG??

How have I never realized you are a Kpop fan?? I knew there were others on NF! Hi my name is Plazmotic and I’ve been listening to Kpop since 2002!

Gosh I hope so!

Things have been good lately, mood-wise. There’s a lot of things on my To Do list that I haven’t hit yet that I really should, but I’m not sweating it because I’m getting other stuff done. Major projects on the list include: Start my Udemy course on web development and design Fill the two wedding albums I have with my newly printed photos Convert all my old wedding cards into a framed collage Research Greek island cruises for this summer/fall and email to my husband My only concern is that my exercise levels are really in a slump. My schedule and my SILs have not lined up at all in the past month or so, so I’ve been going weeks without walking with her. I know I need to go back to the OCR place, but the last few times I was there I felt so exhausted and nauseous while I was working out… fear of feeling bad is keeping me away.

Welcome! You’re in good company, I turned 37 recently and this is my fourth attempt to reshape my lifestyle for the sake of better health.

Welcome back! I too did the thing where I was very active on NF in 2015 then dropped out of sight for a few years before coming back recently.

Time for the weekly Monday morning catch-up: Week 3 Day 5 (Friday) Freggies - success! Calling this a success because I had pasta with veggies at lunch, then for dinner I had strawberries for dessert. Eating window - success! Eating window was 10am to 8pm. Journaling - success! Got my journal all up to date! Week 3 Day 6 (Saturday) Freggies - incomplete! I totally forgot to include veggies at lunch and had some taco skillet spaghetti. Eating window - incomplete! 8am to 9pm, whoops. Weekends are like this. Husband made breakfast for me in the morning and hung out with a friend in the evening. Journaling - incomplete! Got home late and didn’t have energy for journaling. Week 3 Day 7 (Sunday) Freggies - success! I totally forgot to include veggies at lunch and had some taco skillet spaghetti. Eating window - incomplete! 9am to 7pm. I think I ate that early because I hadn’t eaten enough the night before, woke up hungry. Journaling - success! Caught up with my journaling (including dream log) for the week. Week 3 Summary: 59% this week, which is still not good but at least it’s an improvement from last week! Can’t believe we’re into the final week of this challenge. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Highlights of the weekend: - bought some fancy expensive artist markers at Michaels and realized I have a 50% off coupon at home, so I’m going to return it and buy it again, later. Maybe. Because… - I’m starting to get weirded out by how overtly Christian Michaels is. I might just start shopping at DeSerres instead. - Visited a close friend on Saturday and she made me hot chocolate from scratch! Seriously, she roasted raw organic cocoa beans, deshelled them, used a mortar and pestle to grind it into a paste, then added it to boiling water with powdered cinnamon, ginger, and cayenne, plus a bit of honey. It was delish. - Also tried the new Blossoming Rose Matcha Tea Latte at Starbuck, loooooved it. Hooray for Canadian exclusives! - Saturday night my husband was out of town and I slept the most beautiful, unbroken sleep. Went to bed at 11pm, woke up at 7am on the dot like a boss. - Hung out with the in-laws on Sunday and randomly decided to teach the nephew about the Fibonacci pyramid. He’s hooked haha, that kid really loves numbers.

I’ve been reading about your crush exploits in @Butternut‘s thread and thought I would visit you here to get caught up for details! I’ve been in the position where I crushed hard on someone, they reciprocated my attention by being basically my best friend and cheerleader, then when I confessed feelings he slept with me but rejected the idea of being in a relationship. I also tried to continue being friends with him AND setting him up with my other friends (I was totally His Cool Female Friend Who Wants Him To Be Happy Even If It’s Not With Me), but eventually I had to cut him out of my life and move on.

Anyone who expects nothing but grace and rainbows from someone having a rough go of things (especially women, and especially expecting this of mothers) can go stuff it.

A quote I like that you might want to ponder upon: "Perfect is the enemy of good." Also, the Pareto Principle, which I'm using at work right now but could be applied here too: it commonly takes 20% of the full time to complete 80% of a task, while to complete the last 20% of a task takes 80% of the effort. Personally I've also found that tea is a great substitute for food when I'm feeling munchy in the morning, before lunch (I don't eat breakfast either).

I experienced something similar this morning. I’ve been only eating from 10am to 8pm and this morning, without even realizing I did it, I ate some a tart at 8am. Normally I’d think “great, I fucked it up again, might as well eat ALL THE THINGS.” But this time I made myself think kindly of myself; I thought “it’s okay! Everyone fails, the key is to fail upwards! Just continue with your routine like that blip never happened!” Negative self-talk is a killer. It takes practice to change that nasty voice in your head.