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Bonaventa

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About Bonaventa

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    Newbie

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    warrior
  1. Welcome back. I'm in a massive whirlwind of change and redirection. Turns out I've been heading into a burn out. I have neglected to check in with how I truly feel about this whole job situation that I am now home, on week three out of four, to recover from the mistreatment of my job situation and what I allowed to go on for longer than I care to admit. So yeah, I'm basically forced to change my ways now. I started therapy and also got some books to go along with therapy. Being away from this entire situation also helps to calm down and sort my emotions. Really, why did no one tell me that growing up is basically a lie. You're not growing up. You're getting older, gain experiences which desillision your inner child and try to get by with what you have by then learned society expects from you. So no growing into being an "adult" but more like growing into faking it in the hopes of becoming it. Seriously, if I had known as a teenager that most adults I looked up to didn't have a clue, I'd have been so much more gently with myself... Anyways, I'm starting that now. It ends here. I am becoming my own parent and take care of myself. A friend told me once, it's like on airplanes - you need to take care of yourself first before you can take care of anyone else! I am determined to do just that. It will be bumpy because I have to work through some old values to set new boundaries but I'll cross that bridge when I get there. Or paddle through the water Thanks, @Harriet for that kind advice. I have read something about morning pages, that's basically sitting with your emotions through writing it out in an unfiltered way for 3 pages long and then see which themes arise. I have placed a book next to my bed and am curious to learn what lingers in the back of my mind. Regarding my goals, I have made some adjustments to my flat to easy the cleaning goal. Bought a new floor wipey-thingy and also came up with how I could make budgeting more fun: In combining it with podcast time! I love podcast but feel like I never have the right occasion for it. But if I combine it, I can make it a ritual. Like a sacred practice of numbers and words. I also have agreed to a trial month of CrossFit. Tomorrow is my first class after the trial class and I am nervous to show up on my own. It is cool that I am off work so I can go to classes during the day that are hopefully smaller and thus not as overwhelming for me as a big class would be. The thought alone gets my heart pumping faster. Yoga is going... well it's not going at all. I fail at home challenges over and over and just starting to suspect that no matter how much I want to be that person who can do those challenges successfully, I'm just not. I need a tribe as in a class. That's why I have quite high hopes for CrossFit. The tribe aspect is quite prominent from everything I can see and am told. Last but not least, the meal prepping. While working this was going strong! I was preparing, I was hungry af at work and those snacks, lunches and occasional breakfasts where life-saving. At home though, I have to admit I keep forgetting to nourish my body. Drinking is okay but still needs improvement and eating is just embarrassing... Honestly, who forgets to eat? It's a vicious circle because my body will eventually be painfully hungry and then my patience for good cooking is running low which prolonges the time until I can actually eat?! I know it is stupid and yet here I am. I must confess, I'm a bit disappointed in myself that I don't do better on this front and thus will make it a priority for this week. This week I will parent myself to a healthy eating schedule. This was my update. Until next time!
  2. Does your reading quest include audio books? Hej there, I stumbled across your post and can so relate to it. Thanks for sharing!
  3. So check in half way through the week: It's been mostly good but I had an all exhausting meeting-to-meeting Wednesday that sucked what little enegry I had regained right back out of me. That was also the point, where I had 3 treats and the first time ever that I needed a schnaps in the evening to help calm my head down. Since I'm quite strict on the alcohol front (thanks alcoholism in the family - not), this was big and I'm glad I already called a friend and the boyfriend beforehand to have a support net in place. I'm also struggeling to fit the second weight training in as well as the 15 Min Yoga practice Until Wednesday I was sore from Sunday. Thursday I have a doctor's appointment, Friday monthly girl's night - can I do two weight training sessions on the weekend? Probably can, right? Just don't overdo it like last Sunday I'm tired. And exhausted. And feel like I need a massive change in my life. Like switch jobs AND towns AND even states! But currently I'm not sure if this is my instinct telling me my deepest wish or my fear telling me to run. I'll go figure that out now. K. Bye.
  4. Hejhej @Ignimbrite How is your week going so far?
  5. Sooo, first day after making the commitment: How did I do? Well, I chose to eat my healthy snack with some additional oats and seeds for breakfast and was running hangry around 4pm... I ended up having my second sweet unit for the day in the form of a hot chocolate with a cookie. So lesson learned - eat a little more breakfast and keep the snack for its intended time. I have the worst DOMS I can remember from yesterday's thrusters/workout in general and went to Monday yoga class with a friend! That was awesome though also painful because of soreness... Tomorrow will be a rest day and only the yoga session I have as part of my yoga goal. It will help me prevent burn out.
  6. Yeah, exactly. No one tells you that in Highschool
  7. Good question: so, my problem usually are lunch and snacks at work. I normally don't have breakfast or only a banana. Than around lunch I get hungry so that's where I need to prepare and then just before work is done I get hungry again (nearly regardless of what I had for lunch) so that's when I need a sweet-ish snack ready. So I aim for 5 lunches prepped and 5 snacks prepped. I'm currently into thrusters (I think that's a perfect whole body movement) so that's where I start. I agreed with my boyfriend who is an active Crossfit-er to add 3 more movements that I don't know the English names anymore Yeah, but if I can do those 4 exercises well and confidently than I'll be able to ask my gym for a new programming. I know right?! And it's not so bad - until you see it and then it's everywhere! Mh, I haven't studied the programs yet so I don't know how realistic setting a certain goal yet. All I know is I like to work on the handstand part first. And if I dive into the programs further I'll report here and adjust the goals Yasss!
  8. Here I am at the dawn of time. Again. This time of wellness to not make time for illness. It's been a rollercoaster to say the least and somewhere on my journey I lost my path and am stumbling through the woods, a bit disoriented but since I'm writing it down here, I feel confident in my abilities again. Now there's a win already! I have several goals but this time, I'm toning them down a notch. There is already so much pressure from work and family - and let's be honest, mostly myself - that if I cannot control other people's behavior, at least I should be kind to myself. Now, let's see what we got: Goal 1 Nutrition: I want to meal prep every Sunday that is followed by a work week. I get terribly hungry around lunch time and it is better to prepare before I eat up all the cookies around the office - and we have loads... I also want to only eat 2 units of sweets per day, i.e. one cookie at work and maybe one piece of chocolate at home. Or if anyone brought cake into work: one piece of that and one virgin cocktail after hours and then that's it. Goal 2 Training: Strength train twice a week for at least 3 months as well as do one handstand exercise from the NF Rings&Handstands - since I bought it, might as well use it! Goal 3 Yoga: Attend Monday yoga class at least 9 times in the next 3 months (including Holiday season) as well as practice at least 15 minutes on my own on 5/7 days of the week (here all kinds of yoga are allowed; breathing, meditating, asanas,...). Goal 4 Adulting: Adulting is hard work and there certainly are more days than I like to admit when I want my mommy to come back and take control over my life But let's be realistic, I can do it all on my own if I show up for myself and with showing up I mean: On Saturdays check in with my budget and finances. Also, hoover every Friday even if it is just me and the cats in the house - clean the cat hair, Bonaventa! Last but not least, even if it is your most unwelcome chore in the world: Wipe down those floors on the first day of every month. Come on, that is not too much to ask! Remember how good it feels when it's done? So this is the current 3 month plan. I'll track my progress this time to see progress and a big check-in in March
  9. Gosh, that will be a challenge BUT you can totally do it! From what I have observed here in loving-beer-drinking-Germany is that if you tell everyone that you don't want to drink alcohol anymore - at all! - they will usually ask why at first, but then just accept it. (Except family, but oh well…) That's what I have seen with friends who chose to quit drinking alcohol as well as me choosing to stop eating meat. I believe in you! And don't beat yourself up, if you slip up - just never two in a row, right? :) Yay, driving wherever you and Falkor wanna go! I have no idea about fire fighter life but go you!!! Oh gosh, I get it. In summer I'm a sweaty mess ^^' But I have found biking to be better than walking because of the wind and the reduced time it took me to get where I wanted to go. Though getting off the bike usually includes a short hot flash. :D Do you have to take the clothes with you or could you also store some clothes at work or the fire department so you don't have to run around with a gigantic backpack with all the clothes and shower items? Maybe you needed a weekend off to rest and recover from the soreness? I'm awful at resting but I follow this CrossFit athlete on Instagram Lauren Fisher and she recently talked about how important it is to give yourself and your body some rest to do better overall. And, I mean, if the top athletes tell you to rest a day between sessions, than who am I to disregard that, right? :D
  10. Uuuuupdate! So, the holiday and crazy work week are over - yay! Though a bit struggeling on the drinking front since my drinking focus got shifted away because my colleague only managed a small part of what I gave them to do for those 4 days off. Anyways, finishing this week strong: have removed my make up more often thanks to your lovely tips on how doing it early in the evening helped - I agree! It's such a great feeling to relax into the evening with moisturized skin. Absolute game changer!!! I went to the gym twice (and am now sore af but worth it) and also reactivated my Insta account for what it actually was - my accountability buddy! It feels weird to talk to invisible people but I'll pretend to talk to myself that helps. (Btw it's @tigerspiceandcinnamon if you want to be accountability buddies - every tricerasibling is welcome ) Lunch wasn't too bad the last days but only by accident. To ensure a better week ahead, I meal prepped lunch and dinner. I also converted the last dark chocolate I had at home into brownies which will find their way to work tomorrow so people will help me eat it. It's awesome because we have a saying here that eating alone makes you gain weight xD so I'm sharing! It's bedtime now, so good night and have a lovely week y'all! <3
  11. Thank you and good to know I'm not alone struggling with what I shame myself with to be an obvious task that surely everyone manages somehow xD
  12. Update on my first two days: As I type this I'm super tired and it's 20 to 11 pm #facepalm Anyways. I ate dinner and was outside in my lunch break. Yesterday for the planned walk, today "only" for some sun rays but I also made my way to the gym after work to stretch and black roll my back from sitting in a meeting all day. As thought, when in the gym I start to play around with all the fun toys they have like the rowing machine... Yesterday my dinner was tiny but still nutritious. I can also unproudly declare that my cookie count is not yet minimized. I don't know what it is but I feel like I lack the energy that usually comes with a fresh challenge. On the drinking front: that went well today even though I had to slightly subsidise my drinking with some lemon soda that I watered down two thirds. Funny thing though: even though I drank about 2.5litres I had a wicked headache like from drinking too little. Whatever happened there... To fight the headache off though, I added some specific stretches in the gym. Lastly and probably the most ironic: I didn't go to my weekly Monday class even though I know I can't go next Monday since I'm not yet back from my weekend getaway... Why am I self-sabotaging so much?! Apart from that I managed some other adult stuff. Like laundry. Or a clean kitchen. Or calling the tax guy. Or engineering to switch phone companies to a cheaper offer this year. It's amazing what adults have to deal with.... I hope you had a lovely week so far <3 K. Bye.
  13. Hej team, I'm Bonaventa and I'm respawning with my first challenge ever. To make things more interesting I have an exceptionally crazy work week ahead and a long weekend away at the start of it. I choose to see this start as a good challenge to get out if my own way and jump start this new season of my life. I am a NF member for about 3 years now and have improved a lot since then. Less sugar by a lot, regular exercise is a thing in my life and my mindset has shifted a ton. Last year was a hurricane of events and I have been struggeling to maintain... everything. Weight-wise I maintained my level but in a quite unhealthy way. So this has to stop. Game plan: Up my EAT by going to the gym twice a week instead of once and make two Wednesday yoga classes a month in addition to the weekly Monday class. Up the NEAT by going for a walk every lunch break and play more with cats. Eat a proper dinner. Actually take the time and cook something nice for myself. Limit the sugar intake at work by drinking more. Aim to drink one kettle before lunch and one after (~3litres together). Go to sleep by half past ten the latest during work days. If possible, take make up off and put night cream on. I think that's enough goals to focus on for now. Let's see how this goes next week with all the meetings and expo prep to do before taking days off but I'm positive! #babysteps
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