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Rin Asami

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About Rin Asami

  • Rank
    Newbie
    Newbie

Character Details

  • Location
    Missouri
  • Class
    adventurer
  1. Ah, I didn't know there was a rink in Creve Coeur. I've been to the one in Webster Groves though a few times. I just put Kirkwood since that is the one closest to me. I don't know when I'll get the courage to go again, but I'm hoping this year will be the year to start exercising again and making better food choices. I could see myself going more if I was close to a rink though.
  2. Hi everyone! I've been gone for a while and haven't posted much, I'm shy lol. I was wondering if anyone here is near the Kirkwood, MO ice rink and would possibly like to get together and skate sometime. I haven't ice skated in about four and a half years but I want to get back into it thanks to a new anime I've watched. I took several lessons but still am not that great (especially after such a long time). My husband does not want to go with me since he's doing his own thing at the moment (boo him). I know with the new year a lot of people may want to get into healthier habits so I thought I'd ask. I'm pretty introverted but one of my goals for 2017 is to try and put myself out there more. For a little about me, I'm a manga/anime addict (I do read yaoi fyi), an internet nerd, I dabble in web design, I write fan fiction/short stories and I'm 32. Please let me know if there's already a group formed for ice skating, I'd love to join!
  3. I'm trying to level up my life by learning skills that I can not only have fun with but also possibly get a new career with. I'm already learning web design and Japanese but something that caught my eye recently was Adobe After Effects. I would like to be able to animate images, more specifically, animate manga. I love watching all those anime music videos online and things like that and would like to learn. I have not found any good tutorials on how to do this though. The so called tutorials online go way too fast and don't have enough instruction for a total beginner. Does anyone know of any great free (or possibly paid) tutorials for After Effects online? Thanks all!
  4. Zooma, I find that I do this a lot also. For me I think it more relates to fear of success. It seems like I get so far then all h*ll breaks loose and I just eat the most awful stuff and feel just as terrible after. Metal blocks are hard to get past sometimes.
  5. Thanks Pathfinder. I think you are right, we do all have a choice and doing something big like moving/leaving isn't something you can do on a whim. I mean you can, but it does take thought and planning and it isn't something that I should ever take lightly. I think I also have a sensitive fight or flight issue because as soon as I smell something hardish I want to run away. I don't but I beat myself up, my stupid brain trying to lie to me and tell me that it may be better if I leave or run away. But on a logical level, the sane me knows that running away or hiding is not the answer. I also feel like I'm too old and I've let the best time and opportunity pass me by. I know it is not true but the evil part of my brain tries to convince me lol. I don't know why it is so darn hard to do things that you know for a fact are good for you. I know, according to research, that exercise can help with depression and things like that. Grrr...if I know this then I should be on that treadmill in a second and do it as much and as often as I can. Sometimes I wonder if subconsciously I don't want to get better. Why, I don't know, except for being scared of being successful.
  6. No, you've got a point...why do I stick to some things and not others. It's a real thinking point! So going through one by one on my I stuck with each: college: I knew I had to have some college (got two associates) to get a decent job plus I really enjoyed the classes; I love learning. my marriage: I found someone that isn't going to leave me because of my issues and loves me despite them and I love him so I enjoy having a companion too. my current job: I'm there because of necessity; it is not my dream job nor what I want for myself for 10 or even 5 more years. Studying of Japanese: I love it, I know it is my passion but I find it hard to believe that I could truely make a career out of it..except for translation, which will take a long long time. All of these things have one common thing..I enjoy or have enjoyed doing them (aside for my current job). Even so, I think the difference is that I don't see those things as changing me much, though I know they do in little ways. I'm stuck on the thought that if I drop the weight or travel by myself and love it that it'll be a radical change and I'll have a midlife crisis and drop my current life for a new one. I know, sounds radical and a tad ridiculous and I do not know why I'm so afraid. I'm so focused on the "possible" negatives of bettering myself that I cannot focus on the positives like...maybe I'll be more confident or maybe I'll encourage my husband to get healthy too. I guess I just hear about some people almost having a personality change, like they are a different person after doing something big like losing a ton of weight and getting in shape. I just don't want to do so and then end up hurting those I care about now and end up wanting to leave them behind. lol, sounds kinda crazy when I type it out.
  7. Ok, here it goes. I'm going to lay it all out here, hoping that someone has gone through the same things and can offer advice or support. I'm hesitant to post my fears online but everyone seem helpful here and I've gotten a lot more hope after starting to read Steve's book. I have been a quitter of most things all my life, that's pretty sad considering I'm 32 years old now. I'll be all "gung-ho" at first and really work at it, say eating better or exercising five days a week, and then I'll just stop after a few weeks or a few months. I start to see some good results and I just stop...like something comes up and I get sick or I can't work out one day so that one day becomes a few days and then I quit. The only real things I haven't quit in my life are: college, my marriage, my current job (that I so want to get out of), and then my studying of Japanese (going on 2 yrs now, woot!) I've be diagnosed with anxiety/depression, borderline personality disorder, and ocd...so...not fun things but meds help some. I've also got some of the lowest self-esteem that I've ever seen. I've also been thinking a lot lately and have come to the conclusion that not only am I scared of failure and success but I'm afraid who I will become if I do succeed...which I guess does fall under the fear of success. I am terrified of the person I could/would become if I succeed and get that job that doesn't treat you poorly or lose those 60 lbs that I need to lose to be healthy or go on that language learning vacation to Japan alone (which would be my first trip/time alone Ever). Fear just has me by the throat. I'm so scared that I'll turn into someone that isn't happy with my current surroundings after I succeed. I mean, my husband is doing great at his side business now and I admit, I am jealous but proud of him, but he is overweight and choosing to do this side job vs get healthier. So if I really get at it, lose the weight, or do things by myself...what if I really like it? What if I feel great and then realize that I may not need him anymore or want to be with him. I love him dearly and maybe this is the stress of the lack of time we have due to the side job, but I really fear these things. I also feel guilty because my husband started the side job (which he loves because it involves his hobby) because I was complaining a lot about lack of savings. So here I am aggravated with my life and knowing something needs to change and it starts with losing some weight and gaining self confidence but every time I get started I start to worry again. It seems so silly because no one can predict the future and it sounds dumb to not get healthy or not try to fulfill my travel dreams because of what-ifs. And of course, I'm just plain lazy most of the times and feel like after I get home from work and do chores that I'm poop and don't want to do anything. Then i find that excuse that I'm too tired and I'm not a morning person so I can't get up an hour earlier. Gosh, I'm so full of excuses. So, I'd appreciate any comments if anyone has had these types of feelings before. I thank you for bothering to read if you got this far too! lol
  8. I was thinking on similar terms Zooma. I have the fear of if I change, how will those react around me. How will I feel about that? Will I like the same people if I change? It is all very scary.
  9. Thanks everyone. I really like the idea about avocado. I never thought about mixing it with anything to make it taste different!
  10. lol, That's probably my issue...I need to learn to cook better! I am so lazy and don't want to cook but still want to eat yummy food. I need to search the recipes to see if there is a section on crock pot meals or something that is quick and easy. Crock pot meals aren't quick but if you put them in the night before at least there is no real prep when it's time for dinner the next day. By the time I and my husband gets home I'm just worn out from the workday and don't want to cook or have something that takes even 1 hr to make. I think it's time to re-evaulate my time and make this work one way or the other.
  11. Thanks, I'll have to try that hot sauce brand. I know Frank's basic hot sauce is ok but what about for foods that it/hot sauce doesn't go with. Any ideas? The other thing I can think of is regular yellow mustard since I think it's zero calories but again, it doesn't got on much. Too bad they don't make a "good on everything" sauce lol.
  12. I am reading Level Up Your Life and I'm ready to start changing my habits little by little. I wish I could do it all at once and start eating better and exercising and stick to a rigorous plan but I know I cannot. I liked Staci's email with her precooked/prepared chicken thighs, sweet potatoes and veggies but I have such a hard time eating foods that are on the dry side like that. I prefer to have a sauce on my food to make it easier to go down and also more flavorful. However, it seems all the sauces that I really like are full of sugar and calories. (ie: ranch dressing, honey mustard, buffalo sauce, etc.) I've thought about just drizzling the food in extra virgin olive oil but I'm not sure if that would give me the taste I'd need to stick to the plan of eating healthier. Does anyone have any suggestions for some healthier sauces? I realize that I may just have to learn to enjoy drier foods but to start with I want to make this as painless as possible to curb my habit of just grabbing something quick and unhealthy. Thank you in advance everyone!
  13. Thanks! I can't believe how helpful the levelupyourlife site is and putting in all down on quest logs. Writing it down never worked for me before but it feels so different when I put it all in a gaming perspective and I get pumped just reading the book!
  14. Dreaming about Japan. Time to get back to my Japanese studying on Memrise.

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