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Severine

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About Severine

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  • Birthday 08/09/1981

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  1. Haha yeah the secret was (a) Christmas Tree Shops was selling fancy Italian Fido-brand jars for super cheap and (b) DIE MOTHS DIE.
  2. Oh man, that sucks. We had them like 8 years ago and we were able to completely get rid of them but only by being pretty extreme: we threw out all food that wasn't either in a can or in the fridge, I emptied all the cupboards and washed and bleached them, and we waited like 2 weeks with empty cupboards before re-buying anything so we could keep a look out. We also put out pheromone traps to catch the few that slipped through that process, and then we bought a huge collection of hermetically sealed glass jars and from that point on we stored all dry goods in those jars (flour, rice, oats, sugar, pasta, etc.) so that if we did buy a contaminated container of something they wouldn't spread. It worked, but it sucked even when living with people who were 100% on board, and I can't imagine Dumb and Dumber will be quick to volunteer to help or even respect any new rules/system you set up. The good news is that those pheromone traps really do work. You can get them at Home Depot or on Amazon. I'm sorry. Maybe tell your dad they're the things biting him so that he cares and tries to fix it?? 🤔
  3. Wow, he couldn't have picked a better topic to bother you if he was trying. I really hope he's not just doing it to be an ass.
  4. I just finished an awesome lunch of chicken milanese with two grilled portobello mushrooms and a side of black beans, sweet potatoes, and cilantro. All I had to do was assemble it from the containers and heat it up, and I am basking in the feeling of happiness that comes from eating a well-balanced, healthy, delicious meal that I didn't have to do any work to make happen. I should have signed up for a service like this years ago. Life-changing, without hyperbole.
  5. Maybe this will help: when I had some pain and I was concerned about gallbladder stuff and/or my appendix, my doctor sent me for an ultrasound just to check things out, but he also said that if my appendix had burst or I was having serious gallbladder problems, I would be literally doubled over in pain barely able to walk, so he wasn't worried about it being that given my much lower level of discomfort. It might sound weird, but that really reassured me because going forward I didn't worry that every little twinge was a gall bladder or appendix problem. This is a good example of how doctors saying "I'm not concerned about X" is 100% worthless to me, but if they take a minute to explain why they're not concerned, it often does help. Doctors take note. And don't feel bad at all for not driving them around. They're adults and they can solve their own logistical/health issues while you attend (by yourself) to yours. Trust me, they don't feel bad about letting you down ever. Don't return a favour they never did.
  6. It's okay to be anxious about it. You can be anxious about something and not want to do it and still do it. I've seen plenty of evidence of that in your life! PT may well help you and, if it does, it'll be worth this. Even if it doesn't, it's your gateway to MRIs and answers and possible knee replacements and a host of things that could improve your life, increase your mobility, and reduce your discomfort. Fuck literally everyone's opinion about your butt. None of their business, and you have the right to wear yoga pants anywhere. If you start to feel nervous, just try to imagine everyone around you wearing nothing but a thong and a pair of thigh-high stripper boots. You're wonderful, and the thing you're doing is hard, and it's okay to feel bad. Just don't doubt that you can do it and that you're worth the effort.
  7. I once knew someone who was really big on "standing still is victory when entropy and time are continually conspiring to worsen things". It's especially helpful to me with respect to weight. I want to lose weight, but in a world where weight gain is the overall social trend, not gaining weight is something to celebrate in itself, especially during periods when you feel off for whatever reason. Maybe you can take the same perspective? You're not failing to advance, you're defending your position and guarding your hard-won progress (of various sorts) from backsliding.
  8. Not sure if this applies to you but I suspect it might given the things you've said about this so far: my previous therapist pointed out to me that it's not just the actual things that happen or the comments that get made that do damage, but the creation of an atmosphere where things could happen or criticism/shaming/etc. could get dropped on you at any time. And it creates this feeling of never being able to relax or never feeling comfortable in your own skin because you're aware, even if it's subconsciously, that it could happen at any time. Whenever you write about the way you feel in your house (like you can't go for a walk/cook a meal/clean something/eat something different/etc. without commentary) it makes me think of that. It's just this feeling of like...constantly having your shoulders up around your ears waiting for the next bullshit. It's an exhausting way to live.
  9. This makes a tonne of sense to me and I know I've read somewhere (can't remember where, of course) that trauma survivors often subconsciously shape their bodies in ways they perceive as protecting them from unwanted attention. With your mom's narcissistic obsessive nitpicking of your body and wanting to control every aspect of it, I certainly wouldn't be surprised if that was a thing that affected you. She seemed to have negative opinions about literally every possible version of your body (like, you could be too fat or too attractive but there didn't seem to be a happy medium as far as she was concerned) and considering how much you hated the attention, I can totally see unconsciously drifting toward whatever seemed to get the least commentary as being a thing that would happen. She also seemed to have this weird running theme of bodies being gross/dangerous/untrustworthy that comes with its own baggage.
  10. I'm so sorry about your knee! Baby it for sure. I hope it heals without trouble or lasting impact.
  11. I wasn't a DS9 fan, for the most part, but I really liked Voyager. I generally find my opinions of the two shows are opposite of most people's. Yeah, it's no weirder than Worf liking prune juice ("a warrior's drink") or Picard's on-and-off romance with an actual criminal, but my feeling with Chakotay was always that his personality/background/preferences felt a little like they were assembled by some kind of mad-libs-esque mechanism. Not that every character needs to be consistent or coherent, but the contradictions and odd mixtures seen in the other characters hung together to form a comprehensible idea in my mind in a way that never happened for Chakotay. He was always something of an enigma to me. And maybe that was supposed to be his deal--someone who's just hard to get to know. I just remember watching the one episode where they're watching pit fights on some random space station (that ended up kidnapping Seven) and he's waxing poetic to crew members about the beauty of hand-to-hand combat in a way I never would have seen coming, and I was just "WHO ARE YOU, MAN?!"
  12. As someone who is regularly told that it is weird to go for walks at 10pm (when it is (a) nice and cool (b) impossible for randos to look at me, which unfailingly distracts me from whatever I'm thinking about) I appreciate this position. I watched all seven seasons of Voyager in the span of less than two months in 2006, after buying a bootleg box set on eBay, because I was getting divorced from someone I never should have married while being 25 years old and in law school, and everything about my life was confusing and unsettling and stressful and thus I was delighted to bury myself in the problems of being stranded in a far-flung quadrant of the galaxy with space pixies and their jealous asshole boyfriends and a Borg femme fatale and a first officer who inexplicably likes boxing and those aliens who could teleport-steal your liver and that one episode where George Costanza from Seinfeld is in a think tank with an actual giant alien whale in a tank because some writer was probably baked and thought that'd be hilarious. I haven't seen any of the episodes since that fever binge, and I think that instead of re-watching any of them I should just read your synopses/commentary and try to remember the episode while laughing my ass off. Thanks for that.
  13. I love dahlias! As you say, they're so fussy, but they're one of the few delicate plants I find worth the effort. When I was a flower farmer, they were always a showstopper in our bouquets. Dividing the tubers takes some practice, but over time you develop a feel for it. A few of my farmer friends and I would get together, make lunch, and spend an afternoon doing all of ours together. We'd trade samples of our favourite varieties and it also gave me a chance to learn from those more experienced. Maybe see if a local gardening group would be up for such an event? Here's an old snapshot I took while harvesting in 2015: As someone else mentioned, dill doesn't like to be transplanted, so it's best to grow it from seed. Plant the seed not too deep, and when the plants emerge and are about 2-4" high, thin them to 1 plant every six inches. Bouquet is my go-to variety, but there are a lot of good options depending on what you're looking for. I think your analysis and decision re desserts was sensible and reflective. I hope you find a balance that works for you. I also hope restaurants get better in future about attending to food sensitivities...my grandmother once had to be rushed to the hospital because a restaurant didn't take her seriously when she said she was allergic to shellfish. They put a shrimp on the side of her cocktail glass, remembered she was allergic, and then just took off the shrimp before bringing out her drink (without using a new glass). She's lucky she survived and they're lucky she didn't sue them for negligence.
  14. Congratulations on the new bike! Is it your first one? I honestly find motorcycles kind of terrifying to drive (probably not helped by the fact that a family friend growing up lost a leg in an accident) but they also have a certain air of freedom that I find very appealing. I don't think I would ever have the courage to drive one on a busy highway, though. Too many terrible careless drivers out there. I hear you on rain fatigue. I relocated to Vancouver at the beginning of 2022, and while it's not raining right now (we're in the middle of an unusually dry summer actually) I think it rained nonstop from January - June and I was ready to pack my bags. I hope you see some sunshine soon.
  15. I want to see the pics but for some reason they're not working for me. Clicking on the links just brings up one of those broken image icons, FYI. I have had this happen (something that should be exciting feels full of dread) and it's the worst. I hope you're able to somehow find a way to change that. Maybe just forget about costumes, or wear an older one, or rent/buy one, or...I don't even know but I hope you're able to enjoy it guilt-free. Just to be clear, I'm in no way saying the decisions I made were easy or didn't involve a lot of agonizing and worry and guilt and overthinking. I think change is easier for me than some people but it's still not without a cost and not without fear. I don't think it is for anyone. And even though I did the things and they worked out, I wasn't able to actually take the leap and do the thing until I (1) accepted that it might not work out and make sure I still wanted to do it knowing it could fail and (2) had a plan for if it didn't work out. I think a lot of people get screwed over in our world by the constant pressure to "follow your dream!" with the implication that it will always turn out better if you do. Sometimes it doesn't, and I feel like we owe it to people to be real about that, especially when sharing our stories of the times it did work out. The way I was able to know that making a change was what I needed was because I fully realized (pessimist that I am) that it could all crash and burn and I decided it was still a risk I wanted to take and an experience I wanted to have regardless of the outcome. Anyway, all of this is to say that you can and should make your own choice and only you get to decide what you want. And don't let anyone make you feel guilty for wanting something different OR feel guilty for deciding to stay where you are. There are obviously good things about the possible change (or you wouldn't be tempted to make it) and good things about your current situation (or you wouldn't be tempted to remain in it) and life isn't as simple as there always being one right answer. Give yourself space to want and decide without worrying too much about how it'll be written in someone else's narrative. I'm going to say that basically any framing of anything that involves you having to "earn" the right to feel a certain way or want a certain thing is 100% bullshit. I don't mean that in a critical way at all but rather in a "don't let the bastards keep you down" sort of way. Even though I don't know who the bastards are in this scenario. Possibly social expectations or internalized concepts of what you should do or how you should think or whatnot. People with mental health problems get to do cool and interesting shit, too. Michael Phelps, Simone Biles, Jim Carrey, and Richard Branson have ADHD. Ryan Gosling does too, and was put in a special needs class as a kid. There are researchers and professors who win awards and discover cool shit while living with bipolar disorder. The number of famous high achievers who have opened up about struggles with MH issues like depression and anxiety is so long it would be annoying to share in its entirety, but includes big names like Beyoncé, Dwayne Johnson, Nicki Minaj, Lady Gaga, Winona Ryder, Prince Harry, etc. Many of the most celebrated artists and authors in our history were so tormented and dysfunctional in one way or another that we have the trope of the "tortured artist" and a general cultural assumption that happy and well-balanced people seldom make brilliant art. Lots of people have executive functioning issues (myself included) and it's basically a continual quest to find ways to cope, adapt, work around them, etc. Please give yourself permission to want everything you want with your brain exactly as it is. Yes it makes it harder to make certain dreams a reality, but that's a problem for you to solve, not a reason to deny you the right to dream.
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