Dreamweaver

Consider this formal notification that your little image up there has been stolen repurposed for my later use. It's one of the coolest things I've seen in a while. Looks like a good challenge for sure, though. Certainly more robust than mine... Good luck!

*tentatively raises hand* Just here to say hello. I joined the site only a day ago, but I instantly knew that the Assassin's guild is in line with what I want my fitness goals to be (gymnastics, Yoga, Parkour, Ezio Auditore-ing). Just starting up in the academy now since I definitely have more money than sense, but I've already been on something of a workout regimen of my own for a couple weeks (Daily 2 reps of 10 dumbells rows, 10 pushups from knees, 45 seconds plank, 30 squats). I'm hoping to adapt it to something more suitable to my goals, but I also realize my body composition needs to change a lot before that's possibles. Considering I can do a whole .25 of a pull up (also known as "hang there and flex valiantly"), I think it'll be a while before I kong vault over anything. Anyways I'm all ears for tips, and I'm going to be using my "literary talent" to ensure that my logs and my challenges are entertaining if nothing else, and I really hope I get to know you guys, since nothing motivates like a community! Unless it's the eSports community I'm a part of. Then it's demotivational instead >.>

Hello World; I'm a 25 year old programmer/writer/IT technician/bookworm/gamer from California that's finally decided to get my fitness under control (again). I used to be a crosscountry runner back nearly a decade ago, but my wealth of sedentary pursuits and extraordinarily poor diet eventually caught up with me. I'm 5'10" and 220 now, with most of that being fat, and as someone who spent most of my life identifying as skinny, that's not really ok with me. While I have accepted that I'm unlikely to ever be classically "skinny" again, as I finally grew into my father's broad shoulders, I do still want ot be as fit and agile as I used to be. As such I plan to put a big focus on bodyweight workouts, mostly to allow me to pursue Yoga, Gymnastics, and hopefully ever Parkour in the future. Obviously these interests have lead me towards the Assassin guild (though I admit Monk was tempting) and I've recently started my first challenge with them, which I would love help in keeping accountable for in the thread here. Hopefully if nothing else my passion for narrative can lend some smiles to a few people while I work on being able to do a freaking pull-up again

This is me and DDR. All the cardio I ever needed, with some not terrible body-control added in!

"You follow in my footsteps?" The legendary wetboy smiled at the youth before him, as if he had been told a joke. The face on the young man belied his seriousness, however. "Good gods, you're serious, aren't you?" "Would I have put so much effort into getting your attention if I weren't?" The young man shot back. The wetboy just stared at him, past him, and popped what appeared to be a clove into his mouth before chewing, a thoughtful look on his face. For the first time the youth saw clearly the face of the man who he so looked up to, the Legendary Durzo Blint, said to be the greatest of all the wetboys. It was said that the thieve's guilds may run the streets in the rotten underbelly of Cenaria, but it was the wetboys that ran the rooftops, and a wise man feared the man above more than the man he could see. He was surprised at the age of the man: he knew that the legend of Durzo was far from a new one, but somehow he had never really understood that the man must be far beyond his peak years by now, though he looked no older than forty. His mouth was locked in something between a smile and a sneer, a look that the young man took as the sign of a once well-meaning or well-humored soul beaten down by the dross of daily life in the unfortunate "Kingdom" of Cenaria. Aside from his remarkably dark eyes, though, the young man was surprised at the sheer banality of his appearance. Were it not for the veritable arsenal of weapons or the unusual mottled gray garb that he wore beneath his similarly colored cloak, he could have been any of the various neer-de-wells that he passed on the road everyday. Those eyes though, something was unusual about their depth: they seemed to draw light in and trap it rather than reflect it. It lent a somewhat otherworldly look to the man, especially when he was concentrating on examining something like he was busy examining the youth now. "What do they call you, street rat?" He finally asked. the youth couldn't help but notice that his hand had left the hilt of his blade, where it had been ever since the encounter began. "My mother named me Albireo. The others just call me Re." At the name there was a curious glint in the mans eyes, and Albireo couldn't help but note that it seemed very much like the look in the eyes of a cat right before it pounced upon a rat. "Why do you want to follow me, boy? Even if I take you with me, if you follow this path you forsake all others. That fine looking girl who sells peaches at the market? She can't ever be yours if you do this." "My whole life I've been told what to do, and beat up if I didn't. Life was like a ship, one that I ain't got the wheel to. I'm done riding the waves, I want to take the helm, and make sure that the people that hurt me get hurt once over. If I'm an assassin, ain't nobody going to mess with me." The smile was suddenly gone from Durzo's face, and his hand back on his blade. "I'm no vilching assassin. I could put a knife in the hands of any of you rats and show you where to plunge it. That'd make you an assassin, but nothing compared to me. If I told you to kill that girls master right now, you probably could. But then what would you do, stand around with your thumb in your ass while holding a bloody knife in the middle of a market? Any vilching idiot can take a life, be an assassin. For an assassin a kill is an act, for a wetboy it's an art. You come with me and maybe people will fear you, but that only makes the job harder. The only person's respect a wetboy fights to command is his own. If you can accept slumming through shit every day, ignored by everyone, yet still have the respect to stand tall when it matters, then you can be a wetboy. Cause nobody is going to be watching when you find out which way your mark likes to walk to work. No one will see the poisons you laced on to the dart you planned to kill him with. And you better hope that no one sees you when you blow it home into his neck, and watch as the poor sap takes his last breath. No, you won't be feared; the shadows will earn all the fear you command, since they're your home." Durzo walked forward and put his head near Albireo's ear: "But I promise you one thing, kid. You sure as fuck ain't going to fear anyone either. Now you piqued my interest, so I'll give you a shot, but if you ever fail know that the last thing you'll see is my two eyes, understand?" Albireo's jaw nearly dropped. When he hatched the crazy plot to track down and bait the most famous wetboy in Cenaria, he never dreamed it would work this spectacularly. While a bit of his head registered the threat in the man's words, it was too busy being drowned out by the jubilation of the rest of the mind to be heard. Dreams of his own dark deeds were already forming in his head. "I'll do it. I'll make sure you don't regret it." Durzo laughed: "There's no way in the nine hells that's going to be true kid. Just try to stay alive, and worry about my pride after you've taken your first mark. First, worry about my first task." "Alright, what do you need me to do first, master?" Visions of daring thefts or night traversing a perilous obstacle course flashed before the eyes of Albireo. "You're too fat, kid. First things first, start eating nothing but what comes from your own hands (Reduce fast food consumption to only weekends. Excludes lunches at reasonable eateries as long as they are otherwise healthy eating), and stop eating the bread from the bakery. I know it's easy to steal, but it's there to fill your belly, not build your muscles. See if that girl can slip you some of the greens she sells. Gods know she has no lost love for her master (Eliminate bread entirely from diet, and add vegetables to every meal). You do that shit while making sure you do a good bit of moving every night (Adopt 7 day workout schedule, alternating between strength training and Yoga. Workouts need only pass the ten minute duration mark to qualify for this stage), and you'll see me again in another month. Fail and you'll not see me nor the pretty girl ever again." To say that Albireo was unimpressed would be an understatement. He watched as his new master turned away, and wondered if perhaps he was on the blunt end of some sort of cruel joke. Eat less bread? Something told him that just eating less bread wasn't going to get him swinging from the rooftops anytime soon, though...He ha to admit that he could stand to lose a few pounds. Finding a consistent source of food seemed to have put a few bulges around his midriff that he never recalled having before. "That's fucking it?" He asked, right as Durzo was about to leave. "What the vilching hells do you mean 'that's it'?" THe words connected with Albireo's ears right as the back of Durzo's hand connected with his face, flooring his spirit as surely as the cuff floored his body. Fortunately the perennial rains made the filth at his feet a soft landing spot, though far from a clean one. Durzo continued, his back turned to Albireo. "Do you think that the life of a wetboy is a careless one?What do you think happens if you miss one step while leaping across a roof? Do you fancy being a meat pie for the dogs? How about training to kill, hmm? Do you think that a sword meant to teach to fight can't very well kill if handled carelessly? What if you cook your Aldenroot poison as if it was Denyweed and find that your poison dart didn't do anything more that piss off the man you just tried to kill? Art is precision, and a wetboy is an artist. There is no 'that's it'. There's just dead street rats and walking shadows. Which vilching one are you going to be, because I can aim my blade just as easily as my fists if you aren't going to stop asking stupid questions. Your job is to do, my job is to instruct. At what point in that process did you think you were supposed to question me? If you ask a question, it's because you're not smart enough to know the answer, not because you think you're so smart that I don't." With that, the Wetboy departed, leaving Albireo only with the rains, the horseshit he'd fallen into, and the now significantly more potent voice in his head warning him that this was all a mistake. After a moment he picked himself up off the floor and wiped off his face in the first horse trough he walked past, then slapped at a gnat that landed on the back of his neck. Instead of an insignificant bug, though, the gnat was the point of a dagger, with Durzo's arm behind it. Albireo tried his hardest not to shit himself, and wondered if the wetboy had changed his mind. "One more thing: You got quicker hands than most the street rats. I know you make more than you pay the Guild. Set aside 5 crowns every night too, and save them until I tell you otherwise, got it (Save $5 every night. $20 every four nights is an acceptable alternative)? And instead of staring at that girl in the market, get your ass to the library. Someone is going to need to teach you to read, and better some patient old crone who couldn't hurt a fly than me (complete at least one coding challenge in one of the major scripting languages daily)." Albireo nodded weakly, keenly aware that the way Durzo's arm was draped over him made them just look like drunk fools. No one would notice if he was to get struck down on the spot. The wetboy seemed contented and once again disappeared, blending into the crowd on the main street they had walked into so quickly and immediately that Albireo lost him in a second. What had he gotten himself into? Challenge Summary: Reduce fast food consumption to only weekends. Excludes lunches at reasonable eateries as long as they are otherwise healthy eating Eliminate bread entirely from diet, and add vegetables to every meal Adopt 7 day workout schedule, alternating between strength training and Yoga. Workouts need only pass the ten minute duration mark to qualify for this stage Save $5 every night. $20 every four nights is an acceptable alternative Complete at least one coding challenge in one of the major scripting languages daily Now lets see where our "hero's" story goes from here. Bonus points for people who know the world I'm using! Hope that I can complete something so elementary. I will be logging progress and will attach the log once it's created tomorrow!

I wish my layout afforded me that opportunity. Having a treadmill to make those binge sessions of the Witcher not so unhealthy would be amazing. Hell, with all the coding/gaming I do I would be fit in no time, I'm sure. Bonus points for creating a piano treadmill. Then I'm not sure when I'd stop moving.

Isn't this something we're specifically not supposed to do? The whole world is your playground and you chose a treadmill?

I can't help but wonder if there's some kind of website filled with TV show gifs that I'm missing. Anyways, I might not be mighty, and I might not be quick, but I'll be here too. First Mini for me, so I'm excited to see what it brings