One book that has really helped me think about growing up is "Changes That Heal" - it isn't a perfect book and it does play fast and loose with psychological theories in some places, but the section on becoming an adult really helped me start to think about myself as a woman instead of a child. It talks about learning how to see yourself as equal in worth and competence with the older adults in your life, like your parents and your pastor and your teachers, and learning to rely on yourself to make things happen rather than expecting a parental figure to do things for you. I don't agree with everything it says, but it has lots of good self-examination passages and questions.
And regarding your walk with Jesus, never forget that when Peter started looking at the waves and wind all around him (i.e., took his eyes off Jesus for a while, like we all do), Jesus reached out and caught him and didn't let him sink. He knows your heart, my dear friend!!