WanderingLiz

I know I'm a week behind on responding to ANYONE's challenge starts (much less yours, you beautiful overachiever), but I *love* this and your goals are epic. Effin' EPIC, gurl. Just read this aloud to the BoyThing and we both started cracking up at the blunt accuracy. <3

Well flippity heck, my final post never went up. Thanks a lot, phone. I spent the second half of July without a functioning computer and in the insanity of moving. I have since been recovering, with another visitation by my lovely depression self (who now kind of looks like Sadness from Inside Out). My challenge actually ended fairly well -- I hit my step goal 5 out of 7 days during the final week. Hydration was a lot harder. I had this all specced out on my phone post, but hey, no crying over lost packets, right? Suffice to say, other than my frustration at missing epic NF peoples for almost three weeks, chaos maintenance was successful. <3

Augh, that would actually be maddening to yo-yo so easily! I'm cracking up at the "too lazy to Google" -- that's some serious lazy, girl! I've found when you really really really want to know, that's when you'll do the Google-ing. <3

Week 5! Water: hit goal once! Steps: didn't hit goal, weekly total was 24177 Stuff Purge: ALL THE THINGS. 5 bags instead of 5 items. Holy crap. Pathfinding: Homework achieved Meditation: Crap didn't track >.<

Oh my gosh that is MADDENING! Don't you just want to shake them? Well ok don't shake your mom but still... I'm really hopeful for the new place. There's a decent workout room and a pool. I can't squee enough over the pool. I'm looking up that podcast now! *hugs back* I'm reaaaaaally bad at baby steps. Little bits are like... idk. Sometimes it feels like failure, you know? But you are 110% right, if you wouldn't treat a friend or a kitten that way, you shouldn't treat yourself that way! <3 Thank you for the reminder.

I totally looked up the Handstand Helper video, that looks like so much fun! I'm going to have to try it.

Oh hon.... So many hugs 'n so much love.

Drinking water from my water bottle. There's something about the way cold water is focused through the straw and glides down my throat that is just epic.

So, some real-talk here (if depression bugs you, skip to the bottom where I've included a cute kitten). I got on the scale today. My hands are still shaking actually (although that may be dehydration, I haven't had more than a few sips of water today). 260.3 I was shocked and horrified when I first saw that number. "WTF Liz." Then I went to my app to look at how much that means I've gone up. (I've had a Withings smart scale for years, it's been super helpful) And there's a little banner "Congratulations! You've hit a new low weight." Seriously? "This is the first time in more than 60 days that your weight has dropped below 261lbs." Well, hot diggity damn. But I'm already in my spiral. I'm beating myself up. Why can't I do better? Why don't I focus? Why don't I work out more? The whole "Chaos maintenance" isn't just life chaos. It's the chaos in my head... the reason why I go to therapy and am on medication. Times past, this spiral would send me sobbing to bed for 3+ days. I've always been heavier. I've always loathed myself. And it sucks. It straight up sucks. Right now, I'm not sobbing. I'm shaky, but I'm not sobbing. . . . . . . . . . And now, PROMISED KITTEN!

The stuff purge has been taken to 11. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I love Fridays too. It's a joy to return to the forums after two weeks sucked into work-land and go through your challenge thread. So much light in my evening.

I'm embarrassed to admit, I was demoralized enough after this challenges "slip" in updating that it's taken me the last week to work up posting. I guess at least this time I came back before it was over? And I've been tracking my steps and water.. but still, poofing for two weeks. Sigh. Here's some totals (some tracking is better than none!): Week 3 Steps: 26244 (hit goal twice) Week 4 Steps: 22,311 (hit goal twice)* (One day lost to a migraine) Week 5 Steps: 13,541 (so far) Water is kind of frustrating -- apparently I lost all my tracking history on a recent app update. Then I switched to using the FitBit app, but very recently. What I can say is I haven't hit my goal yet this week. Meditation was going fairly strong until this week, when I changed my schedule around and started doing my freelance stuff in the morning before Day Job, and reading before bed. Somehow that resulted in me stalling out a bit. But I have done timed listenings to the Calm app at least twice, so it's not fully off my radar. Stuff purge is getting ramped up this weekend. We move Thursday!!! Holy shit that's soon. Because I have priorities, I've already ordered internet for the new digs. So I won't be disconnected from my fellow nerds for too too long. Pathfinding homework, at least, has been getting consistently completed. Solid win. Ok, maybe I don't suck too much. This is chaos maintenance, after all.

Haha the week has been fairly chaotic. I ended up having a panic attack about our recently accelerated move date on Wednesday, but having some simple and consistent goals has been helpful! Thank you for the encouragement!! [emoji173]ï¸ Recapping Friday! Oz water - 66, so damn close. I did have two beers with dinner that aren't counted. Steps - 5170!! Meditation - 1m! This was a sitting and breathing day, not a mantra day. Today is a slower day; storms and subsequent migraines make progress difficult. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Thuuuuuursday Feeeeedbaaaaack! Oz water - 75!!! Steps - 4004 Meditation - 1m Pathfinding homework this weekend is self-care so this'll be an interesting goal to meet. ^.^ Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Thank you! My powers have not yet combined to form Captain Planet, but I'm getting there!! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk