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About Akari

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  • Birthday 12/27/1990

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  1. First day at work after three days home with my ill son. Until Lunch it was okay, then the secretary of my boss called me. She wanted something from me. I tried to explain her where she can find it but she refused to listen and screamed at me. "You have obviously enough time to print me that" She never had never before screamed at me, so I was shocked. When I gave her the document I tried to talk to her but she refused to calm down again. I went to my supervisor and told him. He said, that she got screamed at a moment befor by the boss and now she passed it on to me. This woman works at least
  2. I overcame my worries and applied for the job. I feel really good, even though there is a high chance that I'll get rejected. But if I don't try, I won't get anywhere.
  3. Hi I'm Akari, a 30 years old single mom of a two-year old boy. Lately I am often frustrated. My little one is ill again. That's the fourth time in six weeks and some colleagues at work make stupid comments about it. The tome when I am at work is awful: I sit around and count the hours because there is nothing to do. That's why I finally came to the conclusion that I need a new job. After procrastinating already for three days I started to write an application for an interesting job, but i didn't finish it. The old anxiety is back with all its nastiness. I feel sick. My mind plays tricks at me,
  4. This week I was really tired - not mentally but physically. I don't even know why. Yesterday my boss was angry. (Actually he was angry the whole week. Corona affects our protection. We cannot get the materials fast enough) I corrected one contract, because there was an information missing. And he asked why I didn't do that a month ago. So I told him frankly : Because I didn't receive this information. I would appreciate, if every information regarding changes of contracts or offers will be sent to me too. (sonce I am part of the sales team) His reaction was: That's an excellent idea! We gonna
  5. Last Tuesday I gave my little boy into kindergarden despite him being ill. I was nervous and anxious. Around twelve I got the call: He is feeling bad, he didn't sleep and I should fetch him. I needed another hour to finish the last task and give information to my boss. I also instructed a colleague. When I arrived at the kindergarden my son was running around and playing. But he was coughing a lot. At home he slept for more than two hours. Beeing alone in the office and being responsible for everything made me extremely nervous and anxious. It was a bit overwhelming but I managed
  6. I feel bad. My son is ill and I really need to do some important stuff at work. My colleague is at vacation. I just need two or three hours but I have none who can take care of my son. My only option would be to give him into kindergarden for this time.
  7. I took my courage to call her and tell her I don't need the solar panels. She instantly replied : Alright, that's no problem. I was surprised. And it showed me again that I often worry to much for nothing. In the end it didn't get the garden. She still wanted 400 €, I offered first 100, then 150€, but she refused. After I hung up I thought : Alright, good luck in finding an idiot who takes that desolate hut for that money. I'll continue growing vegetables on my terrace. Today I was again able to watch some birds. I did put some sun flower seed in a self made wood box in the tree in front of th
  8. I visited the garden yesterday. It's basically a green meadow with one tiny vegetable bed and a shack but it's good earth. The only catch: the tenant wants to sell me her 2 solar panels for 700 Euro which I have no use for. I wouldn't even be able to make coffee with that, it's just for light. With this money I could buy some raised garden beds for my terrace and the best earth for them. And that would eat away almost all of my savings. It feels kinda unfair. I just want a tiny space of eath to grow something but I don't have the money. My mother said to me: decline it and wait fo
  9. And I bought a sql book. I will learn that. Today I asked my supervisor to program a little command that filters specific data out of a large table. That's pure logic and I am good at thinking logically.
  10. My PC tells me to do something else than playing videogames. The graphic card is defect. That's the third time in three years. I guess that's the punishment for bying cheap. I hope I can get a new one from the seller like the last two times. Today I had a cute little visitor on my terrace : a little bird with red tail feathers. I also got a call today. Tomorrow I can visit a garden in a allotment area (is this the right translation?) . The woman wants to give it away. I was hoping to get a garden next year. This year would be awesome since I could start growing vegetabl
  11. On Thursday I drove to my mother and stayed till Sunday. It was really relaxing. I had more time for myself then usually because she played with my son. My son can say 'Mama' for about to weaks and uses it now very often. Two other favourite words are 'Wauwau' for dog and 'mia' for cat. Almost everything with four legs that isn't a cat is a 'Wauwau'. Today my day at work was boring and exhausting again. I have nothing interesting to do. I asked a few times over the past two months to become more involved but nothing is changing. The funny thing is that I helped last year to design
  12. Today was a good day. My little son and went up at four to make breakfast, went back to sleep and slept till eight. Last Sunday was the time change. The clock was moved one hour forward. I have always problems with the change. Fortunately I have vacation. The day was bright and sunny. In the afternoon we had 20 degrees celcius. So I played in the sandbox with my son and we went for a walk. I also managed to clean my kitchen and the living room. Something which I am avoiding for two weeks now. I also did some work on the terrace where I am creating a little garden to grow my own vegetables. I w
  13. Hello everyone, it's been a while. I hope you are all well. I should be well. I have a wonderful son (1,5 years old), a safe job, a nice little apartment, no financial worries. But I have no deep connection to other people, besides my little son and my mom. It's been two years since I did a therapy to learn to deal with social anxiety and I learned a lot. I notice when I come near the "the black hole". Two weeks ago I fell into it. I had the first panic attack in over a year. Because of the pandemic and the lockdown in Germany it is hard for me to get in touch with other people bes
  14. Es tut mir Leid - I am sorry. Ich bitte um Entschudigung. - I ask for forgiveness. For example if you ask someone on the street what time it is: Entschuldigung, können Sie mir sagen wie spät es ist? If you want to apologize for a bad behaviour you can use both.
  15. Hi, I saw you want to learn German. If you would like to have some talks to a real German then ask me
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