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About SeekingCassandra

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  • Birthday January 19

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    NE Ohio
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  1. This has been me this past week+ of trying to face this challenge: Problems I am facing: - You absolutely cannot beat a pack of pop-tarts for an easy to grab, inexpensive breakfast that is also absurdly easy to track. Healthy, however, it is not. - We are cooking at home more for dinner. Great for food budget, and generally healthier meals, as well as providing leftovers for lunch. Pain in the butt to log all the ingredients - my fitbit band broke. I had FINALLY given up wearing my oh-so-pretty but not as functional Withings watch in favor of my old Charge2, and was having some kind of success with it. And then my band breaks. Which somehow, has completely derailed me. Again. -I have fallen back into the Crusader Kings 3 trap. I should be walking/pre-loading meals into my app/cleaning the garage to set up a work out space/even just drinking water while I play, instead of chugging back tea and compulsively trying to "Unite the Slavs" Add in a full chorus of kids' birthday parties, Treason-Day festivities, and the development of a particularly nasty heel spur and I'm just completely defeated but desperately trying to bite the legs off the challenge. Upside - for their birthdays, we got the hoodlums some puddle jumper style swim vests, (the kind that actually encourage correct swimming posture, not the kind that keep them vertical) and within like 20 minutes The Red Panda basically figured out how to swim. She will need to keep the floaty on for a bit, cause she just randomly decides she doesn't want to keep kicking, but she's well on her way and no a pool-addict, so more exercise for Mama Panda - both in the actual swimming and in the wrangling two wet and angry toddlers back out of the pool when it's time to walk home hope everyone is doing better then me at their challenges!! ps. does anyone know anything about changing their walking gait to try and lessen heel impact???
  2. Thanks! I'm still not back at 100% full tilt - mostly missing tracking my dinners and stretching, but I keep trying to scramble up the metaphorical mountain. I do a lot of veggies and hummus during fasting periods, and you are so right - it gets old, but it does the job and is easy to track. I know for the sake of ease/tracking/portion controlling/more balanced nutrition I should probably just spend the money on the little healthy microwave meals for my lunches, but when it comes time to buy them I always balk at the price knowing I could batch cook up some chicken and veg for a week for less. But then I buy/waste the ingredients to batch cook that I never get to, and end up having to buy lunch on the fly which is even more expensive. In other news - this is my newest addition to my inspo wall in my cube at work, reminding me that I have to "become" what I want to "be"
  3. You guys - I literally just got myself a half pound of buffalo chicken lunch meat and a small wedge of blue cheese for my lunch. Weird but delicious, and easily trackable - I have no regrets
  4. sO, I've had a good long sulk back in the fire for a week now. Time to get over myself. I do this regularly. I get so frustrated when things don't go "right" or when I fall slightly short, that I just give up trying. The only thing ever in my life this hasn't applied to quite honestly is my husband and kids. BUT!! I will weaponize my laziness against myself - I really don't want have to write up the intro/big why/etc that a respawn would entail if I keep tapping out on this challenge. And spite is a perfectly acceptable motivation - I will spite myself, and all the people who assumed this would happen. So, I'm tackling the challenges. Here's what screwed me up and how I'm dealing with it: - What's screwing me up? Tracking!! Even though I wasn't specifically counting calories, seeing how not-deficit my calories were was a real mind-eff, especially on days that I had actually been walking more and eating better. It was doubly frustrating that I find logging all the things I eat to be very tedious and annoying to begin with, then to have it being so rude back to me, uhhg. - What I am doing about it: Some of the problem is that I hate MyFitnessPal and much prefer fitbit as far as tracking apps go. But the Withings watch I prefer only links to MFP. And, even more frustrating, my Withings really doesn't track my steps well. So here's the app telling me that I've eaten a bajillion calories, and that I've only walked 1000 steps all day (which I know is literally not possible). So as much as I prefer the hardware and battery function of the withings, I dug out my old Charge2, reinstalled the app and am now Fitbitting again. -What is screwing me up: finding time for walks is not always easy. and I know, I know, if you don't have time for a 10 minute walk, you should probably take 20. But the gainful employment, the past 2 weeks in particular, his been high octane desk-sitting with very little opportunity for reprieve. And evenings I literally have 2 hours max with Red and Bandit, and taking them with me is not always an option (weather and proximity to bedtime being mitigating factors). I can go after they are asleep, but usually by then, I'm fried. -What I am doing about it: Wearing sneakers to work (even though it goes against whatever fashion sensibilities I have) so if by some change, I get 5-10 minutes to rub together, I can just go, even if it's just pacing in the warehouse a few times. Substitute in "Dance Mode" for a few minutes in the evening with the Hoodlums - which still gets me moving, but doesnt require getting socks/shoes/pants (ah, the life of toddlers!) on them, don't have to worry about the weather, etc. -What is screwing my up: I'm not finding stretches that are hitting my "spots". And I know that the ones I am doing will probably help when done consistently, but gouging out the five to ten minutes to do them to only feel "meh" after them is . . .. peeving. And once again, the problem I have with everything in general - finding the time/doing them. -What I am doing about it: Trying to find more/different/new stretches, specifically ones targeting my problem areas and lifestyle (helllooo darebee office yoga) as well as, of all crazy things, trying to figure out if there are stretches I can do in the shower - not a perfect solution, but could be one more place that I can try to shlocket them into my day. So . . .. that's me. Ding Ding Ding, round two, I guess. Hope everyone is having a better challenge then I am so far!
  5. Despair demons are getting me today, pacing around in my brains like it's the flipping hinterlands..... They got me wondering why I'm even bothering with this. Usually takes longer then half a week till they get past my shields but dang.... Send reinforcements!!!
  6. Just got back from walking the dog and watering the garden. Technically hit my water goal already today but since i trippled it yesterday going to try and over achieve again. Still have to log and stretch but for now, a little bit of embroidery and potato-ing. Here, have happy dog walkie photos....
  7. Lunch and water intake update. Food prep for the win. It looks like a lot cause I'm trying the little plate hack. Bit late starting on the water, but now that I'm drinking it, it should go down quick. Should be walking on the remainder of my break but I realized that I'm just under 2 weeks from the hoodlums' joint birthday party and i have no RSVPs and no decorations/cake/food planned yet, so I'm going into panic Pinterest mode ....
  8. Well, im as ready for the start of this challenge as i will ever be. Yesterday i got a ton of food prep done. Breakfast and lunches cooked up and since they were kind of experimental recipes, the data input into a food tracker so logging over the week shouldn't be too hard. Still haven't hydrated, stretched or logged for today ..... My time has been completely consumed with liturgy this morning (which, with the hoodlums is basically a full contact sport for two hourst....actual* photo of how my children behave in Church ) followed by nap, followed by father's day celebration and cooking up a feast for the Fox. (Chicken Schnitzel, a Düsseldorf style sauce, steamed lemon pepper broccoli, brown buttered spaetzel noodles and a side of brown bread. Don't ask about the calories, no one wants to know) Still have time to get it all done to mark the day as done, as soon as I can move again. The day hit me like a truck. Poke me if i don't move in a few hours lol
  9. Morning update: Decided to try and do a little stretch while the hoodlums we're occupied with breakfast and baby shark songs (i feel like the awfulness is a built in punishment for letting you kid have screen time in the first place) What was supposed to be a nine minute stretch session has been going on for the better part of 30 minutes. First interruptions: the dog had to go out Second interruption: Red Panda needed her water bottle refilled Third through infinity interruptions: Momma is apparently lots of fun to climb on when she's rolling around on the floor. At least he's a cute interruptions So, i guess that's the sub-challenge here.... Waiting for peace and quiet time where the kids aren't all over me has been what has been keeping me in the fire.....that time isn't coming any time soon so i have to figure out wats to make it work with or around them, and not let myself derail because i feel like if i can't do everything fully or correctly it doesn't count so might as well not bother. So....I'm chalking up today's prolonged yet ended short stretch time as a win. Cause i tried.
  10. Thanks! I tried to make them functional, but easy to accomplish. In the spirit of "begin as you mean to go on", and because it wasn't a thousand degrees of heat and humidity this evening I rounded up the party and we went on a walk. The Guard Captain was pretty thrilled about it. All went well until Trash Panda decided to be ....well, a napless two year old who wanted to neither walk, ride in the stroller or walk. Cut it short, plonked him in bed and now chilling with the Fox and Red Panda until it's time for her. She's occupied with blocks so i am taking the opportunity to log the day.
  11. Hi All! I did up a brief (re)introduction to myself a few weeks ago over at respawn point a few weeks ago, but always feel weird about starting a challenge late, so didn't do much else, but I'm still in time for the new challenge, so here I am doing the things . . . A very wise (video game) woman once complained about people that "stand in a fire and complain that it is hot". And that is what I have been doing. I complain about how I look. I complain about how I feel. I complain about not being able to keep up with my little hoodlum children. And yet at the end of the day, what do I do but plonk myself down on the inferno of my couch, and add the lighter fluid of ice cream to make the flames just that little bit hotter. So these are my first steps to get out of the damned fire. They may be small, but at least they are something. So, without further exposition .. . my challenges; Goal is to drink at least one of my big bottles of water every day. I know, I know! minimum should be two. But one is better then none, and honestly, once I start drinking water, I always end up drinking more, so better to set my goal to "some" and exceed then to set my goal to "correct" and balk and fail at doing it. Doesn't matter when I do it - I can chug the whole dang thing at 11:59 pm and it will still count. Loot: sticker for my sad, un-adorned water bottle. Why do I want to achieve this goal: hydrate or diedrate, amirite? Feel better, feel less hungry, less headaches, more bathroom breaks, and set a good example for the hoodlums Obstacles in my way: water is gross, tea is delicious Actions needed to achieve my goal; become "that" person and carry water bottle everywhere. Make sure to fill the bottle at the start of the day with tap water from home, which is slightly less awful tasting then water from tap at work. Goal is to stretch and walk at least once every day. I sit too much and everything hurts. I'd love to commit to regular multiple work outs a week. I am not there yet. I want to be, but it took me months to work up to that before. I think I keep failing at my attempts to respawn cause I am trying to jump in whole hog. So lets work on the incremental change. Walks can be any time, anywhere - I lose momentum when I try to "schedule" it for early in the morning, then feel bad about not being able to get out of bed. Bonus points if I take the kids or the dog with me. Streching can be morning or night, or even at desk during the day. Loot: fake hair scrunchie (not at all related to the challenge, but really want one, so yah motivation!!) Why do I want to achieve this goal: More movement, less ouchie. More calories out. Get body ready to eventually start work outs again. Set a good example Obstacles in my way: Sleeping in, refusing to get up from my desk at work, stretches that don't suit my needs, Actions needed to achieve this goal: keep experimenting with stretches till I find some that I really like, remember I've got the world's cutest dog who deserves walkies, set alarms on my phone to remind me to take my breaks Goal is to track all the things. It may seem low-tech and harder to do then keeping it in an app, but for now, track it in my paper planner, just so it's all in one place. If I need to, I can log it in various apps in my phone and then mark it off in my planner. But I should be at least trying to log it all in once a day. This includes tracking meals (which will be put into an app, but then checkmarked off in the paper planner) Loot: order my new planner early (my year resets in September) and include some "splurge" features in it. Why do I want to acheive this goal: There is no point drinking water and stretching/walking if I don't see that I am doing it. If I forget to log it a day, I eventually spiral into not doing it. And if I physically see how much I have eaten, it's easier for me to make the decision to not eat more. I can't argue with cold hard data. Obstacles in my way: taking time to put everything in the planner, data spread across too many apps. Actions needed to achieve this goal: keep planner on hand at all times. swap out current watch that I love but that I don't like the app, with one of my old fitbits I will try to post here regularly-ish with updates. Expect Gifs, anecdotes of the offspring, and maybe even pictures of the dog for she is cute and needs a bigger fan club
  12. It's honestly been so long since I've played this "game", that not only have there been patches, and DLC that I have occasionally tried to respawn into and never finished, but now there a sequel, and my character has loaded into it, but the buttons have changed and I'm just running into walls and falling off the edge of the maps, t Hi all - if no one remembers me (likely), I'm Myrna. Also called Mira. Also called Panda. Also called Cassandra *disgusted noise* Penteghast (at least in my own head). Honestly, I've never been able to cope with just one internet handle - various forums, email servers and blog sites are littered with various identities I have given myself over the years, but that is not important right now. About five years ago, I was active-ish here, and moderately successful in getting into healthier habits. Leveled up, dropped some weight, things were great. Then, as it is wont to do, life came at me fast and hard. . . Children, jobs, building a house, the 'rona. . . . all the things . . . .I could only manage so much, and rebuilding healthy habits have been the thing that gets cut every time. And now here I am five years later, the same weight I was when I started, but now with no freakin' clue how to do the things any more - there is no tutorial and you can't change the difficulty settings. I won't say it was EASY before, but the only things I really had to deal with was my own laziness and self control issues and a full time job. <<<<<< Actual photo of me from five years ago Now I have 2 kids (who are incredible, but exhausting), a husband who is finishing up a college degree while working full time, an aging mother who seems to have more doctors appointments then my kids -- AAAAnd my own laziness,self control issues and a full time job. How I am supposed to schlocket meal planning, food prepping, and exercise into the madness that is my daily life, while still maintaining actual, y'know, family time? >>>> Actual photo of me now I know other people have done all these things, and more - they play on hard difficulty and still get the achievements. But that is not me. At least not yet. But I'm going to button mash way through this, until I figure it out I hate coming in during the middle of challenges but I know I probably should. Until I convince myself to do that I am trying to really focus on the basics. Logging, drinking water, 10 minute walks, bed on time. Wish me luck, and send game manuals so I can maybe figure this all out!
  13. OK, soooooo . . . Sorry I have not been very active here. I think I hit my usual mid-challenge slump at the beginning of the challenge. That's the downside. The upside is, I feel like I am going to hit the last 2 weeks with my normal early-challenge vigor. A few things went very right so far, the last 2 weeks. - My having meal prepped for the bulk of the month has been great. Not having to worry about what is for dinner any given night has been a huge burden off of me. It also makes weekly grocery shipping so much easier. If I forget a few things in the odds and ends I still have to get every week, it doesn't derail the entire week's meal plans. Now, that doesn't mean that I am eating 100% well - I am falling into the snacking and second helping traps again. But if I can get myself into keeping a meal plan, I can use that structure to start cycling in better content choices. -Oddly enough, not putting a "you must work out x amount of times per week" challenge on myself has relieved the stress that I am at least doing more then nothing. A few days last week, I walked laps around the warehouse for 30 minutes over my lunch break. In general though, I have been pretty rubbish at marking off my checklists. But, I think Saturday was a turning point. Fox and I have been dancing circles around our stress recently, and without realizing it have been butting heads in our stubborn efforts to just manage everything on our own, both trying to take on everything by our selves, and we were finally talked it all through on Saturday, and it was amazing. I love having someone that I can solve problems with, and not fight, or passive agress all over the place. I realized that I was killing myself trying to do ALL THE THINGS to try and eliminate all the burden on him, but in the process was neglecting the few small things he really needed me to do to help him out. He realized that just not saying anything and trying to bully through doing everything was freaking me out, and that I am actually here to help. I asked him for help on being accountable to work out regularly - and he is more then 100% on board. We are planning on experimenting with some chore charts so neither one of us is stuck doing all the house work. All in all, it was an amazing chance to reorient ourselves and reset our teamwork. And, in the course of the conversation, I finally voiced a self-realization that has been whispering at the back of my mind for a few weeks now. I probably have an un-diagnosed case of ADD, and probably have been that way my whole life. Just certain habits, trends and behaviours really stand out to me. I voiced it, he confirmed that he has often wondered the same. It's clearly not too serious - or I have been able to moderate it tolerably well. But acknowledging it means I can start reading and learning new and maybe better coping mechanisms. So - onwards to weeks 3 and 4, with renewed gusto and further realization of what DOESN'T work . . .
  14. Thanks! breaking it down to try and correct it is one of the only things that is keeping me from just getting discouraged by the failure. I am forcing myself to look at it as a learning opportunity. Right now, my reward system is $1 earned for whatever loot for every task completed. I need to revisit that a bit though, as I earned $10 on Monday, and that seems like an excessive daily amount earned and yet still didn't do any of the "big" items like work out or hit my calorie goal. I just filled my to do list with little, easy things. Things I need to do and make habits of, etc, but not things that I really need to include in the challenge I think. So I think I am going to pare it down. My challenge is still to do everything on my daily to-do lists, but I only get gold for loot for specific outlined items each day. Maybe pick 5 items off the list a day that earn me loot gold. And maybe negative amount for any unfinished task. Maybe I should have had this all figured out before the challenge started, but I like letting it grow organically. In the past, I set myself challenge rules and parameters, only to find them not functional, so letting them adapt, at leas tthis time through I think will be good. This challenge is for sure a learning process. . .
  15. So, while my daily to-do lists have about a million things on them, I think I want top have a few each day that I particularly focus on. Today's main goals: hit caloric deficit exercise of some variety over lunch break, even if just walking finish readying house before Priest comes for house blessing
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