TheSavageBean

Thursday January 30th Weight 79.3kg The nuts worked really well apparently.

Sunday January 26th Weight 81kg I've been stalling on this weight ever since I posted. Some days I was down to 79.6kg but mostly I've just hovered around 80.3kg. I feel like such a failure. I feel like I haven't been able to do ANYTHING right in the last three years and it's really getting to me. When I came to Canberra I was a wreck. A total and utter piece of shit and NOTHING has fucking changed. Despite all my training and all the different protocols, my strength has barely increased. Despite my dieting from 110kg - 80kg I'm left with this sick fucking reminder of the weight I used to be just sitting there on my hips. Despite all my efforts with building a social life I still lie in bed alone every night. Just staring at the ceiling. Everywhere on the internet I read that I'm starving myself. 1850Cal is what I'm on according to calculators and my weight is just NOT shifting. I'm 183cm tall and I work out 6 days every week. Without fail. My diet is tight and I don't cheat so why can't I shift these last ten kilo? My workouts wipe me out. My cardio always pushes me well over 160bpm unless I'm fucked from training the day before. Sometimes I work out twice a day! Weightlifting, rock climbing, sports circuits, bushwalking, dancing, boxing. I do it all! My metabolism is fucked. That must be it. I must be gaining weight from the smell of food. Insomnia SUCKS. So I'm reverse dieting now. As per Steve's last article, I'm adding calories back into my diet to see what'll happen. For reference I'm eating (daily): Milk 2% fat 2 cups (244 Cal) All Bran 2 cups (256Cal) Vegetables: mixed (about 200 Cal worth) 330g Chicken Breast poached (578 Cal) Rice 2 cups cooked, (484 Cal) Banana (89 Cal) 1851 Calories total, Macros: C/F/P: 271/27/162 The Plan I keep adding food to my daily calories until I start gaining weight to get my metabolic rate healthy and normal again (hopefully). Because my diet is extremely low in dietary fat the first food I'm reintroducing is macadamia nuts. Week 1: 5 nuts/day 10g fat 100 Cal Week 2: 10 nuts/day 20g fat 200 Cal Week 3: 15 nuts/day 30g fat 300 Cal Week 4: 20 nuts/day 40g fat 400 Cal Carbohydrates will be my next target, I'm still undecided as to whether to do this using milk or some other source of carbs. At the end of February I'll re-assess whether or not my diet needs further tweaking and see if I'm gaining/not gaining. I'll have to keep the log while I do this to maintain my sanity, because right now I'm feeling fairly crazy.

I learned: -You are not your career -Writing books is comparatively easy as opposed to PhD Mathematics -The book you wrote is easier to talk about than PhD Mathematics -I should switch career from mathematician to author and see where the leaves fall. -also fitness is still fun too

Tuesday January 14th Weight 80.3kg Workout: general cardio 30 minutes 135bpm

Monday January 13th Weight 81kg Measurements: 39/32/38 Total weight loss: 1 inch around hips, 1.7kg Increased chicken intake. Workout: Running 25min 9kph

Sunday January 12th Weight 80.5kg

Friday January 10th Weight 81.1kg Workout: running 25 minutes 9kph Saturday January 11th Weight 80.9kg Workout: running 20 minutes 9kph Super depressed on Thursday night, my insomnia hasn't gone away and I'm looking at strategies to cope with it. Friday night was the first night that I haven't been extremely depressed. Going to a party tonight so have to guard my diet closely.

Thursday January 9th Weight 81.9kg

Wednesday January 8th Weight 81.4kg Diet going well! Workout: Running 8.88kph, 5min. followed by incline walk 6% 6kph Leg Press 120kg Depressed and insomniac at the moment, don't really understand why.

Tuesday January 7 Weight 80.6kg Diet going well! Workout: Running: 9.81kph, 12 min, short rest, followed by 9kph 9 min Pullups, unassisted, 5x3 Seated row 67kg 3x10 Deadlifts 60/80/90/100kg x5 Bicep curlz 12.5kg 2x10, 10kg 2x10

New year, new plan: Monday January 6 stats: Weight: 82.7kg Measurements: 39/35/39 diet won't change: chicken and veg x3, milk and bran x2 Workout: Running 9.4kph 20min DB Bench press 20kg Dips 35kg assist DB lat raise 10kg machine OHP: 35kg OH tricep extension: 5kg

November 4th weight: 84.5kg Diet Banana ? ? Exercise None today, see note Note Thesis work interrupted scheduled exercise times. I don't know, I'm probably going to drop out.

October 31st Weight 86.0kg Diet Breakfast: 6 weetbix and milk Meal 2: salami and cheese toastie Meal 3: salami and cheese toastie Dinner: Chicken + veg Exercise ? I don't actually know, see note Note Well, here we are at the end of October and the end of my first month of diet. Overall I'm pretty happy with October, despite going off the rails for about a week and a half and undoing all my good work for the first ten days, I came back strong and managed a total weight loss of about 2kg this month. It probably could have been 4-5kg if I'd stuck with my guns over the trip and after my supervisor meeting, but that's life and I don't want to get too down about it. I'm going to stick with this diet plan until I get two weeks where I don't lose weight, then I'll look into taking something out or switch out something, probably the salami for water preserved tuna. Euch, tuna. It looks like the honeymoon period of the diet's over, so these last 16 kilo will have to be taken off week by week. If that's the case, ideally 70kg should be achievable by March, which is heartening. My supervisor's having a meeting with me about thesis today, so it looks like I'm going to be pretty stressed over November. I'm sure I can take it though and won't go crazy on diet again. The meeting may affect my exercise schedule, also I'm not sure how motivated I'll be afterwards to go throwing weight around. There's a halloween party tonight that I'm attending so hopefully I can stay away from the lollies

October 30th Weight: 85.6kg Diet: Breakfast: 6 weetbix and milk Meal 2: Salami and cheese toastie Meal 3: Salami and cheese toastie Dinner: 3 Buffet Sandwiches Exercise: Squat Leg Press Hamstring curl Leg extension Lunges Evening: Spin

October 29th Weight: 86.2kg Diet: Breakfast: 6 weetbix and milk Meal 2: Ham and cheese toastie Meal 3: Ham and cheese toastie Dinner: Chicken + veg Snack: Beer Exercise: Deadlift Lat Pdown Seated row Rear Delt Raise Single arm Row Shrug Bicep curl Evening: Quidditch

October 28th Weight: 87.8kg Diet: Breakfast: 6 weetbix and milk Meal 2: Ham and cheese toastie Meal 3: Ham and cheese toastie Dinner: Chicken + veg Exercise: Mild injury today so limited exercise 1h Bench Press 1h Military Press Tricep pdown Face Pull Lateral Raise Evening: Quidditch fitness

October 26th Weight: 86.5kg Diet: Breakfast; 5 weetbix and milk Lunch; Subway footlong seafood sub Dinner; Chicken + veg Exercise: Running Note: The hunger is unmanageable with just the subway footlong. Hence the junkfood because I was at a show at the time. Next week I'll change the plan to split up lunch into two sandwiches I think.

October 25th Weight: 87.1kg Diet: Breakfast; 6 weetbix and milk Lunch; Subway footlong seafood sub Dinner; junk food Exercise: Injury, no exercise today.

October 24th Weight: 86.8kg Diet: Breakfast; 6 weetbix and milk Lunch; Subway footlong seafood sub Snack: Peanut butter and cheese toastie Dinner; Chicken + veg Exercise: Morning; Bench Press 57.5kg (Deload on Monday to fix form, 3x 55kg) Incline Bench Press 40kg DB Shoulder Press 10kg Lateral Raise 9kg Front Raise 15kg OH Tricep Extension 4kg Skullcrusher 9kg Tricep pdown 15kg Evening; Swim Spin Class Note: I had the vaalia yoghurt because I was trying to stave off hunger yesterday. Spin is at 5:30 - 6:30 so it's dead in the hunger zone. It didn't work so I ended up having a sandwich before class. This means I've failed this week's goal but I think the task is impossible if I'm incorporating evening classes/activities into my schedule. I'm sure I'll be able to work this out eventually.

October 23rd Weight: 87.3kg Diet: Breakfast; 6 weetbix and milk Lunch; Subway footlong seafood sub Snack: Vaalia low fat yoghurt (1 serve) Dinner; Peanut butter and cheese sandwich + veg Exercise: Morning; Back Squat: 65kg Leg Press: 120kg Lunge: 1 length Step up: 2 sets Evening; Spin class Note: I've identified something curious. I start to dream about food about an hour before I'm due to eat. In addition, I normally try to convince myself to go out and eat hot dogs and donuts. The bad periods are 11am-12:30pm and about 4pm-7:30pm. After dinner I crave dessert for about an hour. Part of me feels like I need more leg exercises, the other part has sore/collapsing legs.

October 22nd Weight: 87.8kg Diet: Breakfast; 6 weetbix and milk Lunch; Subway footlong seafood sub Dinner; Chicken + veg Exercise: Morning; Deadlift 100kg GHD 4x10 Seated row 47kg Lateral Pdown 47kg Shrug 30kg Bicep curl 10kg Evening; Note: Dinner went really well, I have to admit I had to choke down the grilled chicken breast but overall I was fairly impressed. I'm going to have to learn how to stirfry vegetables better, I'll probably do some research on recipes and sauces later today. Overall though I'm 100% sure that I'll be able to achieve my end goal of ~68kg.

October 21st Weight: 88.2kg Diet: Breakfast: 6 weetbix and milk Lunch: Subway footlong seafood sub Dinner: Chicken + veg Exercise: Morning; Bench press 57.5kg Seated shoulder press 30kg Tricep pulldown 20kg Lat Pulldown 47kg Face pull 45kg Lateral raise 10kg OH Tricep extension 4kg Lying tricep extension 5kg Evening; nothing Note: So the meeting with my supervisor didn't go too great; basically speaking my thesis is going to need a lot of editing. There are still some small tasks to do on thesis with regards to writing new content, but it's not due until the end of February and I only need to write a maximum of about 5-8 more pages unless my supervisor wants something major. In addition to the meeting bumming me out, I spent last week moving, organising, cleaning and finalising a bunch of shit. This essentially lead to me not logging my food like I was supposed to, but that's life. As of now I'm essentially a free man when it comes to thesis, until my supervisor gets back to me there's not much I can do, so I've decided to focus 100% on my health and fitness and do some Japanese study while I wait. I'm just doing whatever when it comes to weights at the moment because I'm weighing up different programs with respect to my goals. I should have a program by the end of the week though. As for diet I'm going to get stricter and stricter as time moves on. This week's goal is to eat weetbix, subway and chicken+veg for my food. Hopefully I'll be able to substitute out the Subway for something else next week.

October 10 Diet: Breakfast: Some ham, about half a fistful Lunch: Large asian bistro meal with papaya milk tea Note: I'm still stressed about my meeting with my supervisor. This could be the end of my thesis!!

October 5th Did a small restaurant tour of Wollongong on Saturday so diet is a little intense Diet: Breakfast 1 Curry pie Apple Turnover Breakfast 2 5 King Prawns by the beach Lunch Nan Tien Buddhist temple buffet. Afternoon tea: Iced coffee by the sea Bacon and Egg roll Shaved ice Early evening meal Chocolate milkshake Hotdog Dinner Thai food, chicken pad that Supper Handful of chips Exercise: 45km walk 20 pushups 40 prisoner squats October 6th Didn't end up keeping track of today, and I am a little ashamed of what I ate, but if I didn't have to write it down it wouldn't be effective. This is what I remember. Diet: Breakfast: Junkfood Bonanza (That is, snakes, lollies, chocolates, iced coffee, convenience "food") Dinner: Large pasta dish Exercise 45km walk Note: Spent the day in Sydney that day walking around looking at various bookstores. I was lugging about 20kg of books around for most of the day. Had a good time October 7th Diet: Breakfast: 1 pancake plain 1 curry pie 1 apple turnover Lunch: Quarter pounder Dinner: half bag of chips October 8th Weight 87kg Diet: Breakfast: Half bag of chips snack: Spoonful of peanut butter, Frozen coke Lunch: Jumbo burger from local eatery Iced tea, iced coffee, milk tea October 9th Diet: Breakfast: Spoonful of peanut butter Snack: Milk tea, regular coldrock icecream Lunch: KFC burger with piece of chicken. Dinner: 3 pizza slices Frozen coke. Note: Obviously eating has been erratic and not very diet like for the last few days. I'm going to blame it on stress and an inconsistent schedule. It'll get better.

October 4th Weight 86.0kg Diet: Breakfast: Subway footlong seafood and egg sub + Yoghurt 3 slices homemade pizza 1 kangaroo sausage roll handful of crisps Exercise: Running; Time: 30 min Distance: 3.61km Pace: 7.63 kph (15 min 9kph, 15 min 6kph) Note: I'm going to Wollongong for the long weekend so my log will update again on Monday or Tuesday but will include the weekend. Also I expect to be a bit lax in diet.