RedCedar

Queer, butch, dyke, chapstick, femme, bear, otter, twink etc. are all for self-identification. "Wanna bet?" is the perfect answer! "Fuck off and stop policing my identity," is also acceptable. Sometimes my girlfriend uses the term "femme-dyke" The forums are good way to productively procrastinate grad school projects, so I'll probably be around. Good luck at your appointment tomorrow, I hope you get good news too!

I totally used "totally" twice in that last post

Hurray for wonderful girlfriends that cook delicious sounding healthy meals, for pillow princess jokes, and queers in the South! (I embrace "queer" as an inclusive umbrella term, but totally recognize not everyone has the same history with the word and may have good reason to be offended by it, so sincere apologies if you fall into the latter category) Boo for panic attacks and friends that completely forget to check in on daily battle logs >.< oops. But I'm here now and I made sure I'm following this time. Also, thanks for posting the links to recipes, I'm totally gonna steal get inspiration from your meals.

Awesome progress all around! You got this

The PCT follows the crests of 7-9 (depending on how you count the Cascades) mountain ranges along the pacific coast, starting at the U.S/Mexico boarder and ending in B.C. Some folks hike southbound, but timing the weather and ephemeral springs is a bit tricker that way, so I'll be northbound. I've been getting together with a group of folks to do the Insanity workout videos about 5 times a week

Congrats on sending those emails! I am pretty sure short, routine emails are the most difficult task for me. I am extremely glad to be in grad school right now, because it means I won't have to ask for any letters for another 2ish years.

I have these feels too! A professor explained to me once that writing thousands of letters of recommendation is part of her job, so I shouldn't feel bad asking. The same goes for anyone is a supervisory position, it's just part of the job. She did give me some advice about how to make it easier for folks when you do ask them for letters though. I now keep a file of all the letters of reference I've had people write for me, so when I need to ask them for a new one or an update, I can send them the old one. I also try to be very specific about what I want the letter to say, to take as much of the work out of it as I can. Obviously these things don't make the anxiety go away, but sometimes they help me get out of my own way.

Week two in review: 1. 100 pushups 3x/wk = A Workouts have been solid, a mix of pushups and Insanity. I technically have one pushup workout left for this week, but I put in a serious effort to keep my own promises to myself, including one "make up" morning workout, which I have previously would have let myself off the hook for. Not anymore, I'm done buying my weak excuses! 2. 64 oz water/day = A This one is becoming a habit, I hardly have to think about it at this point. 3. Cook one Paleo dinner a week = A!! Tuesdays "exhaustion salad" was strict enough paleo for me. I didn't closely scrutinize the salad dressing label, but at this point it's more about habit building than 100% strict adherence. I think my diet this week could be considered paleo+dairy (and beer). 4. Life Quest, write/journal every day = F Life quest? What's that? I had a feeling I would be too busy to track stats this weekend, so I took a few measurements Saturday morning. I think I like the Sunday evening timeframe better, it feels more accurate, but oh well. I'll do better next week! Measurements and changes as of Saturday morning are: Weight: 177 lbs, No change Body Fat: (Avg. of scale and caliper): 29.05%, decreased by 0.85% Waist: 39", lost 1/4"

This was a long and interesting weekend. My grad program hosted students from several other (somewhat) similar EE programs for the whole weekend, so I have been one busy human! I managed to fit in an Insanity workout Saturday morning just before everyone began to arrive, and found time to finish two nalgenes in between facilitating activities, stacking a cord of wood, prepping dinner for 60 folks and the thousand other odds and ends that make conferences happen. I forgot to take the time to feed myself throughout the day, and that plan backfired a bit over dinner. I ate an entire dinning hall tray full of taco salad (potentially more beef than lettuce) and made two trips through the brownie-ice cream-sundae bar. Except for the over indulgence in food, dessert and wine it was a pretty good day. Then I got so caught up in a fireside conversation I accidentally stayed up 'til 2:30 am. Less than 5 hours later, (Sunday morning) I was back in the kitchen making coffee and helping make pancakes. My self-desginated role of go-fer had me splitting wood and running up hills and stairs to fetch things, but I couldn't find the energy or time to fit in the pushups I had scheduled for today. I did however find time to watch the NFC championship and make a large pan of nachos while getting fairly drunk at a friends house. Today was a day focused more on mental and social health than physical health, and I'm alright with that. I'll pick it up again tomorrow.

Hey Nuala, Thanks for stopping by. I did jump in on that pvp challenge already, but haven't posted any results yet. I should be testing again in the next couple days and am pretty excited to see how I do. I feel so much stronger already. I don't expect to make it all the way to 100 in this first six weeks, my sights are aimed at 50. I think I am an aspiring assassin, or will be soon, but my first step is learning to make fitness a priority in my life.

Hey Ed, I'm in the same boat as you! I also started the 100 pushups program at the beginning of this challenge. My initial exhaustion test was 16 also. I'll be testing again in a day or two, and will be updating my results then

This is about the fourth time I've started on the hundred pushups program after discovering it years ago. I am aiming to actually finish it this time. It's pretty amazing how fast you can progress when you focus on one exercise and push yourself. Also, I think pushups are fun because they feel badass. (rest of Friday update) Went to Insanity again right after class. Also found out they didn't meet yesterday, so I only missed one session. Somehow knowing my workout partners took it as a day off too makes me feel better about having a full rest day as well (instead of just resting muscle groups). And I'm feeling pretty good about the fact that one day off didn't derail the momentum, I was able to wake up a bit earlier and fit in that workout I promised myself. Now if only I can do it two days in a row, Insanity is scheduled for 9am tomorrow. Just finishing my third nalgene of the day. I don't want to jinx it, but it seems like this staying hydrated business is becoming a habit Dinner was good, another variation of the chicken sausage, kale, black bean, corn, broccoli and cheese tossed in an iron skillet. Desecration slipped away though as one beer while making dinner, and another with dinner (not-so) slowly turned into 5 for the evening. It's nearly midnight here in the North Cascades (PST), so I'm going to turn in and try to get some sleep. Maybe more rest/earlier bedtime should be a part of my next challenge.

Your nature youth club sounds really cool, have so much fun with the little ones! (What age group?) I'm an environmental educator because I love sharing my passion for the outdoors with anyone, but especially kids. I often feel like they teach me more than I teach them.

Another multi-day update. Wednesday I had no classes scheduled, so I spent most of the day working on a project for school, then made the 2.5 hour drive to Seattle to see my girlfriend of four years. We are both swamped in grad school living a few hours apart, and the distance is sometimes exhausting. We had made plans to go to the gym together, but she had to stay late at work instead. We ended up doing a short at home workout, two rounds of tabata protocol, just to feel like we did something. The we made turkey, kale, black bean tacos, bell pepper and nutritional yeast tacos, yum! So I managed to meet my hydration goals, got a tiny bit of a workout in, and had a healthy dinner. Yesterday (Thursday) I had a very long day, leaving Seattle at 7am and not returning to my little house in the woods until 8pm. I forgot to pack myself a lunch and ended up having trail mix for breakfast and lunch. I did get in several hours of birding in, spent lots of time outside but not much hiking around. I had planned on getting my pushups done when I got back from class, but I was too tired and just couldn't make it happen. (Probably didn't help things that I drank a delicious stout while making dinner on a mostly empty stomach hehehe). Made my two nalgene goal for the day, but this was the first day of the challenge that I didn't get any kid of workout in, so that feels a bit disappointing. I had an alright dinner, no starchy carbs but too much cheese and light sour cream with my chicken sausage, bell pepper, broccoli, corn and black beans stir fry. This morning (Friday) I managed to drag myself out of bed and struggle through a pushups workout (67 reps today, the goal was 71). But now gotta run, I'm about to be late for class! Thanks for checking in and keeping me accountable rebels!

@Rookie, in Vancouver there is a store called "Pirate Joe's". It's a guy who just drives down to the Bellingham store, buys a ton of stuff and brings it back to sell. So there's hope if you're in BC! I think dirty innuendo is the highest form of humor, especially when it has nothing to do with your actual "tastes"

That's awesome about the intermediate dance class invite, and to hear dance classes start up tomorrow. Winter is a hard time to get out, so I hope you can find the time for it this weekend. I went birding today and had amazing weather and great luck. As another bird-nerd I thought you might appreciate one of the pictures from today: Thousands of snow geese flocking

Definitely! Getting up early to fit in a workout is one of the hardest things for me to do. I've found I have to force myself to not go to bed until I've done the day's workout, because I'm wont fall for my old "Oh I'll get up early tomorrow and make it up then" excuse anymore.

Sounds like a good life choice to rest and go at it fully when you're healthy. Go get the dungeon boss!

All jokes about loving tasty nuts aside... seriously the BEST chocolate covered uh... almonds... are the ones from Trader Joes, "Sea Salt & Turbinado sugar dark chocolate almonds". I don't know what Turbinado sugar is, but I swear it must be crack. Flea I really hope you stick with this challenge, even if you have to change your strategies around to keep you motivated. Your posts and the host of characters you've attracted are hilariously entertaining. I look forward to following your thread and in doing so it reminds me to update my own, thus keeping me accountable in this challenge. So, believe me when I say that I mean this in the most selfish way possible: DON'T GIVE IN TO THE 'MEH'!

OMFG YOUR DOG IS SO ADORABLE I CAN'T HANDLE IT!!!!

I feel you on this one Fish! I constantly feel like I know what to eat and why... but the actually doing it part is tough. Sometimes I even find myself using my knowledge as justification for not using it. This challenge I've been working on not buying my own excuses. I've been having trouble along these lines too. Balancing grad school and lifestyle changes I find there is ALWAYS something else I could be, should be, ect. doing instead. I have to keep reminding myself that my health IS a priority, and that it's ok to take the time look after it. I think you've set yourself some really smart goals, keep after them!

Sorry to hear about your day of low productivity. I also struggle with mental health issues. I often find the most frustrating part is the powerless feeling of not being able to get anything done, but not being able to do anything about it. A few years ago my doctor recommended I take vitamin D3 supplements starting in the fall to help counteract the Seasonal Affective. (When I got my vitamin D levels tested, they were "shockingly low") I got a late jump on it this year, so I've been taking 5,000 IU D3 supplements. It doesn't make it go away entirely, but I certainly can notice a difference when I don't take it. Glad to hear the endorphins boost was enough to break through the mental fog. Keep up the good work staying active despite the challenges. Your meal planning sounds awesome too!

Two updates in one today. The grad school pace has picked up, projects, projects, projects! Thanks for the accountability and encouragement folks It really does help to stay engaged with this community even when things get busy. Monday: A friend and I planned to make up that rained out hike, and instead found out exactly how much snow her new truck can handle on a narrow windy trail access dirt road (quite a bit actually!) We didn't end up hiking, but we got out of the truck a few times to clear fallen trees and rocks from the road, and examine and follow some really awesome tracks in the snow. We got back from that adventure just in time for a group meeting, during which we had a crock-pot beef stew dinner and took a break from our working on our project to do another Insanity workout. Drank my two nalgenes, got a workout in, but ate 3 or 4 of those Pillsbury Cresent rolls with dinner... damn you overly processed white breads! Why must you be so addicting? Yesterday: I rediscovered how much I think plant-based protein powders are gross. Got some pea protein in the mail today, and as soon as I tried it I realized my mistake. Oh well, gross protein powder is better than no protein power and it will give me another quick breakfast option in the morning. I got my pushups workout in after class, 63 total reps, and then went to Insanity for the "Pure Cardio" workout. That was a tough one, but I felt so damn good when it was over! I even stayed for a bit of additional abs afterwards. By the time I dragged myself up the big hill back to my apartment, I was so exhausted I could barely make myself dinner. I threw a bunch of romaine, kale, spinach and chard in with some (thankfully!) pre-chopped bell pepper and cucumber in a big pot, tossed in a handful of sunflower seeds and a bit of poppyseed dressing, put the lid on and shook it up to make a salad. With shaky hands I opened a can of tuna and tossed it in, and ate the whole think right out of the pot while standing (mostly leaning against the counter) in my kitchen. Then I fell asleep by 8:30 pm while trying to read a book for class. It felt damn good. Challenge is going great on all fronts except the life quest, but all the exercising I'm doing seems to be keeping my stress level in check.