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Whisper
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Posts posted by Whisper
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How do you solve a problem like M
aria?Spoiler for long ass rant.
SpoilerI have, for several years now been friends with a women. We even dated for a time. She has a number of real and serious physical, emotional and mental issues, and she has been in decline almost as long as I've known her. About 3 years ago, facing a situation where she was being kicked out of where she was living and not having anywhere else to go, I told her she could stay on my couch for a bit. It lasted over two years; she couldn't hold down a job, everything got worse. Eventually I got her to start getting treatment at a free clinic and working with Workforce Services to find what assistance she could qualify for. She started the process of applying for Disability, and late last year, we got her into public housing and off my sofa. But after two years all are stuff was mixed together, so when I had to move suddenly in February, a lot of her stuff went into storage with mine. Trying to deal with stuff freaks her out and her freaking out wears me down until I'm yelling right back at her.
Wednesday, the plan was that I would pick her up on my way to work. She was supposed to take the car and my debit card, pick up some plants and plant them in an old ladies flower bed. After work, the plan was to keep working on storage. What happened? At 9am I got an email saying my account was overdrawn. I check it and found over $200 charged at Home Depot. I try calling her, her phone rings and eventually goes to email. I try contacting her repeatedly for over 6 hours, call and text, and I get no response. I have told her in the past that she needs to TALK to me before making a large purchase. I finally get in contact with her, apparently she turned the sound off on her phone before group and never looked at. Oh, and the plants aren't planted and half of them need to be returned 'cause she couldn't decide what to get. And she's late getting me from work, and her friend needs a ride home... So no work is done in storage, and I need to pick her up again the next day, so she can work on plants.
Thursday, I try calling her in the morning to make sure she's awake to be picked up. No answer to several calls. New plan, I'm supposed to pick her up at the clinic after work, she'll drop me at the storage unit, run something into church, work on the plants and come back to get me so I can get to a late meeting. I call and leave a message when I leave work. I get to the clinic and call her, no answer, no answer, no answer... Clinic can't tell me if she is there for privacy reasons. I wait for over an hour before she comes out, never thought to check her phone... She seems all happy, not enough time now for her to do the other stuff, but let's go to the storage unit while we can. She gets more and more agitated at storage until she literally throws something down, stomps off while cursing her phone out, slams on some things, stomps back, kicks something and hurts her two. Me "what was that about" her "I hit my toe!" me "you hit your toe because you were throwing a fit, why were you throwing a fit?" She give some bullshit about how I had complained about the alarm on her phone so she was taking care of it and didn't see why it mattered because we're ignoring all this other noise. 5 minutes after an alarm started on her phone, I had asked if it was her phone, she said it would stop soon, 5 more minutes pass, I did not say anything else, and then she stormed away. Things continue to escalate until I am totally and uncontrolably pisssed off. We leave storage. Me "what the fuck was that all about" Her: "at the clinic today they told me..." Me yelling "so where fighting about something that I don't even know about?" Her, "I was trying not to freak out..."
Friday, I had taken the day off to have plenty of time to work on storage before the sale Saturday. My hope is that she'll drop me at storage, then she'll finally take care of the plants and come back to help me finish. Nope! She needs me to help her with the plants. We don't get to storage until after 3 with lots of hysterics and me having zero grace for the shit. Try to finish needed storing, give up on pricing load the car to the brim and go home.
Saturday, she is slow to get ready in the morning, snippy as hell with me when I get back with the rest of the stuff from storage, and gone off somewhere for seemingly half the sale... But we got it done.
Anyway, got rid of most of what I needed, made a bit of money, donated some other stuff and have a few items in the garage for a later garage sale at the house. Need to do a little bit of clean-up out at the storage unit, but that can wait a few days. I'm taking today off the challenge and eating some junk and relaxing. I'll get back on plan tomorrow.
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Wednesday went rotten. Thursday went worse. Today is off to a bad start, and as I will spend all of it (and a good chunk of tomorrow) with the person who's inability to communicate screwed over the last two days, hopes aren't high.
All spoons are dedicated to finishing the storage unit, getting through the sale, and keeping the body count at zero. Not logging food next two days and I'm eating what I want. And if Miss "I'll be right down" doesn't get here soon, I'm going to scream.
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2 hours ago, Rookie said:
@Whisper from the other picture of just the hand I posted? Or because my shirt from yesterday kind of looks like that plaid?
From the shirt yesterday; plaid looked exactly the same on my phone.
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I swear I've seen that sleeve somewhere recently...
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11 minutes ago, RES said:
My books ALL spark joy....though this method helped me immensely when going through my clothes and trying to justify why I was holding onto clothes I hadn't worn in years and that no longer fit anyway
Most of my books spark joy, but do I really need the copy of "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Success as a Chief" that my Aunt got me umpteen years ago? The psych 101 textbook?
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56 minutes ago, Rookie said:
But yah... I think you could replace "sparks joy" with "if it went missing would you be sad or inconvenienced?". I am neutral to most things I own. And I get that if it doesn't give you some happiness or usefulness then what is the point of owning it.
I think that does work better. Don't have too much clothes, but do have some things that should go for lack of use. I'll be applying that standard when I start going through my boxes (and boxes and boxes) of books.
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Yeah, I think I know where part of the bad attitude is coming from, I'd be pretty bent if people kept pulling that stuff around me too.
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17 hours ago, Diadhuit said:
collected the keys and looked that all was ok. I am a house owner y'all!!
Congratulations, that is awesome! Bummer about the lead, how much is fixing that going to hurt?
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13 hours ago, Whisper said:
Today has been rotten. Spent
Yesterday sucked and to steal a phrase, I ran out of spoons last night. Made it through the grocery store without getting all the sweets I wanted to get, but got home late, messed up my bedtime routine and indulged in late night eating again.
Wednesday: W1D4
Whisper Grows Up
1 Point for checking off all established habits
5 Points for not killing anyone.
6/6 points
Cut the Crap!
3,228 cals, 57% fat, 15% pro, 28% carbs.
0 Point for not eating crap
0 Point for cals between 2 and 3 thousand.
1 point for fat > 50%
0 point for carbs = 10-20%
1/4 points
Learn to Sleep
Sleep 12:05 to 4:06. 3 hr 30 min asleep, 31 min awake.0 point for all electronics off at 7:30
0 point for electronics stay off until 4:00
0 points for sleep start by 8:15
1 point for not staying up if I wake up during the night.
1 points for physically up by 4:15
2/7 points
Mini-Challenge: The Long Night
Walked 1.15 mile / 1.85km
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14 hours ago, Unikarm said:
Okay so
I GOT THE JOB AT TTECH!!!!
11.25 plus commission and it’s call center and all nerdy lol
Congratulations!
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1 hour ago, Rookie said:
Oh and before I do my practice I need to finish shark and snow white horse.
Those are really good!
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Today has been rotten. Spent
Typed long post, phone fucking ate it, and after 7:30, so that's all for now
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20 minutes ago, fleaball said:
At least the cats appreciate me.
Cats can be good for that.
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Tuesday: W1D3
Whisper Grows Up
1 Point for checking off all established habits
5 Points After work went to storage unit with a friend to help her sort through some of the stuff that she has there.
6/6 points
Cut the Crap!
2,376 cals, 57% fat, 22% pro, 21% carbs.
1 Point for not eating crap
1 Point for cals between 2 and 3 thousand.
1 point for fat > 50%
0 point for carbs = 10-20%
3/4 points
Storage unit took longer than expected and needed to get something to eat before heading home. Stopped by Jimmy Johns, thought about an "unwhich" but wasn't sure how well I could eat that while driving and felt dropping the bread would put my total too close to 2,000, so kept it. No chips, no soda, no cookie, so counting it as a win.
Learn to Sleep
Sleep 8:13 to 2:15. 5 hr 21 min asleep, 41 min awake.1 point for all electronics off at 7:30
0 point for electronics stay off until 4:00
2 points for sleep start by 8:15
0 point for not staying up if I wake up during the night. (yes, 75 minutes, but none of be being "oh look, a book when I should be sleeping")
1 points for physically up by 4:15
4/7 points
Sleep started really good. Remembered to use restroom with second dose of sleep meds, which seems to be helping with later wakeups. Woke up at 1:30 anyway, got back to sleep a bit longer. Woke up again after 2 and couldn't get back to sleep. Gave up on sleep for a while, ate ALL THE FOOD, then drifted off briefly again around 3:20. Going to do my best to log the food, which is going to KILL my carbs for Wednesday
Mini-Challenge: The Long Night
Walked 1 mile / 1.61km Just wondered around the neighborhood, something I haven't done since moving in.
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1 hour ago, Unikarm said:
buying them pre made into patties is not a good idea. You can’t flavor them right
Now you know what not to do next time
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2 hours ago, fleaball said:
Literally none of my clothing that’s size 18+ sparks joy but I’m not about to go buy a new wardrobe.
The toss everything that doesn't spark joy has always confused me. None of my clothes have ever sparked joy, but I still need to wear them. My cooking stuff doesn't spark joy, but I'm healthier when I use it. Lots of necessary things aren't going to soark joy...
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1 minute ago, Gobnait said:
I've never been much for working on physical health goals while here. It was always about mental health and establishing housecleaning routines. I hope I'm still as welcome as I ever was.
You're a Rebel, you'll always be welcome. I think at least half of us are working on mental health stuff to some extent.
I like the idea of posting your lists to show what you've done.
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I am sorry that you are hurting and in a bad place. It sounds like you do have problems that deserve to be treated seriously.
Is there something, even something small, that you could do today to give yourself a victory?
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3 minutes ago, Cynforgiven said:
Looked at the clock and almost talked myself out of doing the elliptical today (the "I don't want to get sweaty before work" excuse). But I did it anyway (reasoning that I'm going to be swearing my butt off at work anyway bc of their crappy ventilation system). And yes I read some of my current book while doing it so I got that challenge in a bit as well.
Good win to start the work day!
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Monday: W1D2
Whisper Grows Up
1 Point for checking off all established habits
5 Points Did some yoga in the morning and got out for a two mile walk. Spent most of the day at storage, and am finally feeling good about being able to get everything done.
6/6 points
Cut the Crap!
2,769 cals, 56% fat, 20% pro, 24% carbs.
1 Point for not eating crap
1 Point for cals between 2 and 3 thousand.
1 point for fat > 50%
0 point for carbs = 10-20%
3/4 points
Bit heavy on carbs. Decided to get take out instead of figuring out how to pack out a lunch and decided to have rice and beans in my Chipotle Bowl. Still happy with my choice.
Learn to Sleep
Sleep 8:08 to 4:04. 6 hr 53 min asleep, 63 min awake.1 point for all electronics off at 7:30
1 point for electronics stay off until 4:00
2 points for sleep start by 8:15
1 point for not staying up if I wake up during the night. (yes, 75 minutes, but none of be being "oh look, a book when I should be sleeping")
2 points for physically up by 4:05
7/7 points
Mini-Challenge: The Long Night
Walked 2 miles / 3.22km
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12 hours ago, fleaball said:
That's a cool shelf! If I were in your shoes I'd probably sell it though. Seems like it might be easier to make another one later than lug it around if you don't currently have a use for it.
I think I'll clean it up, put some cubes on it and see if anyone buys it. If they do, awesome, if not, that'll be fine too.
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9 minutes ago, Jean said:
I'm mighty tired of the bullshit that comes with my job, I want to just lay down and sleep and not care about what's gonna happen tomorrow. I don't want to go out and run. It's raining.
This is sad and I am sorry that things are sucky.
9 minutes ago, Jean said:Putting on my running clothes, see you in 30 minutes.
This makes you awesome.
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A friend had borrowed my car Sunday evening. I had them leave it two miles away Monday morning so I could get a walk in before starting my day.
Plan to get at a mile in after work each day to contribute to the group.
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10 hours ago, Unikarm said:
I burnt them....kinda
Cooking is a tricky thing. Without a recipe I am hopeless. With a recipe, if I do all of the prep first (before any heat gets turned on) and follow all the steps, I can usually end up with something edible. I am completely baffled by people who just throw things together and get food at the end. Good on you for giving it a go.
Good luck with your interview tomorrow!
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Wobbegong: A Creature of Habit
in Rebels
Posted
I also care about your zucchini.