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I've been struggling to be okay lately. I've been under a lot of stress and struggling with anxiety and depression, but I've been trying to learn about myself and what makes me happy and makes me feel worthwhile. I'm going to try and keep it simple, and remind myself that the goal isn't weight loss, it's just trying to feel okay. I want this challenge to be very, very easy to stick with, so all the active pieces combined are going to take 1 hour or less per day. Excluding sleeping, because that would be crazy. Main Quest: Reduce anxiety and depression. Learn what causes these. Acknowledge that some things in my life are stressful and that's okay. Goal 1: Quality Alone Time. Reason: I'm an introvert. I like doing things by myself and rarely make time to just be by myself, especially with a partner who likes to spend almost all their free time with me. I'm much happier when I make time for productive alone time. Details: 30 minutes or more per day. Should be something that I want to do that I really find satisfying, and is in no way social. So reading, meditating, painting, or playing guitar would count. Browsing the forums would not, and generally netflix/youtube/reddit/imgur would not; I already do 30 minutes per day of this and it doesn't make me any happier. Strategy: Spend the first 30 minutes of the day by myself. Get a comfortable chair in my home office, shut the door, maybe get a "do not disturb" sign. This is my me time. Goal 2: Enough movement, enough rest. Reason: Exercise is a mood booster. And if I have exercised today, at least I have done something worthwhile. I get sad when I get sleepy. I also find it difficult to accomplish the simplest things when I'm tired. Details: Any exercise daily, 8 hours of sleep daily. I would like to keep working on my C25K training, but I'm not going to be hard on myself if it doesn't happen. I just need to do something, whether it's a brisk walk or a short dance session or a few minutes hula hooping. Strategy: Set gentle alarms for when it is time to exercise and when it's time to start going to bed. Goal 3: Put the right things in your body. Reason: Severe vitamin D deficiency. Alcohol exacerbates my depression. Caffeine exacerbates my anxiety. It was a huge eye-opener when I started tracking my mood and realized 75% of my panic attacks happened within 2 hours of heavy caffeine consumption. Details: Take daily vitamin D supplements; no alcohol; cut down to 1 cup of tea a day. I had been drinking one or more alcoholic drinks per day, along with a quad shot or more of espresso every morning. Strategy: Have vitamins every day first thing when I get up, since I'm always at home and have access in the morning. Tell your friends and family and partner you're abstaining from alcohol and caffeine for the month and ask them to help you stay on track. Other stuff that I have no choice but to do: -Taxes (come on Grizzy, you can do it, you only have to bring two forms to an office and then just wait while a guy does some stuff on a computer...) -Moving (I'm buying a house. Assuming nothing goes wrong, which I always assume things WILL go wrong which causes me to be anxious, we're closing on the 15th and ending our lease on the 30th. So I have to do all the packing and activating utilities and fixing a bunch of stuff and aaaahhhahahahhhhh *cries*.) -Put in consistent effort at work (I got moved off of a project I disliked for under-performing. My boss made it seem like not a big deal, but I feel like my ass is on the line and I have to prove myself on my next project.) Sample Daily Schedule: 7 AM: Wake up, spend 30 minutes reading, painting, or meditating. 7:30: Do 10 minutes of hula hooping, a walk around the block, or at least 1 set of some weight lifting. Maybe more if I'm feeling ambitious. 7:40: A simple breakfast of cheerios, yogurt, fruit or a green smoothie. One cup of tea if I'm feeling really out of it. 8:00: Shower, dress, gather lunch & work stuff. Maybe read some more if I'm still waiting for my partner to be ready. 8:45 (at latest): Leave for work. 9:00-5:00: Working 5:00: Leave from work 5:15: Make dinner or clean stuff or relax while partner makes dinner. 6:00: Eating time. 6:45-9:00: I don't really know what I usually do with all this free time but I can tell you that I'm great at wasting it. 9:00: Get ready for bed, drink some water, read some more, sleeeeeeeeeep. Here's to keeping my head above water this month! I would drink to that, but you know, goal 3...

So I'm gonna try and make this a bit simpler. I think I will be better off focusing on a couple of things and doing them well, really making them habits, and then evaluating how I did at the end of the challenge and going from there. This is basically me telling myself to SIMPLIFY MY CHALLENGES I've been re-watching Avatar: The Last Airbender (and also The Legend of Korra). Mostly, I've been listening to Uncle Iroh. So this challenge is about connecting/listening to my inner Iroh and using the wisdom I've earned. I'm asking myself the things that add the most value to my life and making those my focus for the moment. Inspiration and Gratitude will still happen but they're not Challenge Goals for the time being. The Spirit World: Daily Meditation Fun fact: I found this gif on google....from one of Korranation's old challenges This can be as little as one minute. As long as I do it, it counts. Something is better than nothing Avatar Training: Daily Movement This really really helps my mood. So a little bit every day is better than nothing for me. This is ALL about the mood regulation for me Tea Time: Daily Creativity This has been a quest the past couple challenges and it's really starting to become a habit, at least with writing. I'd like to do more guitar and drawing too, but I've been pretty good about doing at least one creative thing...probably 85% of February. And that's awesome. Sokka's Schedule: 2 Hour Blocks Gonna keep working on this cause when I do it, it really helps my day 5x per week Order of The White Lotus: Reach out to 1 Friend per Week I haven't been reaching out to my friends as much IRL so my goal is to contact one friend from school a week And that's it!

I've been struggling to be okay lately. I've been under a lot of stress and struggling with anxiety and depression, but I've been trying to learn about myself and what makes me happy and makes me feel worthwhile. I'm going to try and keep it simple, and remind myself that the goal isn't weight loss, it's just trying to feel okay. I want this challenge to be very, very easy to stick with, so all the active pieces combined are going to take 1 hour or less per day. Excluding sleeping, because that would be crazy. Main Quest: Reduce anxiety and depression. Learn what causes these. Acknowledge that some things in my life are stressful and that's okay. Goal 1: 30 minutes quality alone time daily. Should be something that I want to do that I really find satisfying, and is in no way social. So reading, meditating, painting, or playing guitar would count. Browsing the forums would not, and generally netflix/youtube/reddit/imgur would not; I already do 30 minutes per day of this and it doesn't make me any happier. Reason: I'm an introvert. I like doing things by myself and rarely make time to just be by myself, especially with a partner who likes to spend almost all their free time with me. I'm much happier when I make time for productive alone time. Goal 2: Any physical activity daily. I would like to keep working on my C25K training, but I'm not going to be hard on myself if it doesn't happen. I just need to do something, whether it's a brisk walk or a short dance session or a few minutes hula hooping. Reason: Exercise is a mood booster. And if I have exercised today, at least I have done something worthwhile. Goal 3: Take your darn vitamins. Have them every day with dinner. Keep a stash in your purse so you have them when you go out to eat. Set an alarm reminder in case you forget. Reason: Severe vitamin D deficiency. It can exacerbate depression and worsen my immune system. Goal 4: No alcohol, low caffeine. Tell your friends and family and partner you're abstaining for the month and ask them to help you stay on track. Reason: Alcohol exacerbates my depression. Caffeine exacerbates my anxiety. It was a huge eye-opener when I started tracking my mood and realized 75% of my panic attacks happened within 2 hours of heavy caffeine consumption. Goal 5: Sleep 8 hours a night. I should be in bed, lights out by 10 on weeknights. Since I'm often out late on Friday, I should avoid scheduling things for Saturday mornings. I need to try and force myself to go back to bed when I wake up after 6 hours on weekend days. Reason: I get sad when I get sleepy. I also find it difficult to accomplish the simplest things when I'm tired. Other stuff that I have no choice but to do: -Taxes (come on Grizzy, you can do it, you only have to bring two forms to an office and then just wait while a guy does some stuff on a computer...) -Moving (I'm buying a house. Assuming nothing goes wrong, which I always assume things WILL go wrong which causes me to be anxious, we're closing on the 15th and ending our lease on the 30th. So I have to do all the packing and activating utilities and fixing a bunch of stuff and aaaahhhahahahhhhh *cries*.) -Put in consistent effort at work (I got moved off of a project I disliked for under-performing. My boss made it seem like not a big deal, but I feel like my ass is on the line and I have to prove myself on my next project.) Here's to keeping my head above water this month! I would drink to that, but you know, goal 4...

I am really, really bad at remembering to set up my challenge for these new, shorter challenges. I'm interested to see what comes of the surveys! Hopefully I'll be able to clean this up a little on Thursday. Sparks joy. (Again.) My goal is to get the boxes of things I plan to donate OUT of my house at the end of this challenge, so every category that might result in donations has to be sorted through and boxed up. I want my yoga room back! Use the KonMari method... electronics [5]cats and garden [4]games and toys [4]photography [4]yoga/fitness [3]Schedule a donation pick-up. [5] Builds a Bridge For this challenge, I've decided to dedicate a little more time to backbends, including cobra, bow, bridge, wheel, camel, and king pigeon. Three yoga sessions featuring backbends each week. [25xp] Exceeds Expectations Due to a bit of a reading slump, I fell one book behind on my Goodreads challenge, and would like to be one book ahead by the end of this challenge. (I am currently halfway through the Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin and the workbook below.) Be at least one book ahead at the end of the challenge. [25xp] Is a Social Caterpillar. Continuing from the last challenge, I'll be finishing up the social anxiety workbook. Complete the last four weeks of The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Social Anxiety and Shyness. [25xp]

And on 2 March 2013 I started this fitness journey thing when I went jogging one Tuesday afternoon in my work clothes and some tatty shoes. There has been lots of ups and downs, but mostly ups. Last year I posted this: This year I am posting this: I have gained weight, but it has been stable for the last six months. But the biggest changes the past year has been on the inside. I've been battling depression and anxiety now for many years, and I am getting better at coping with life. I am getting good at checking the boxes every day.

I’ve become a huge fan of Habitica, as it has really kept my habits and daily tasks on track. The quests and collecting of things is also motivating, as is not killing my party when I don’t do things. Thus, my monster-themed quest! Be forewarned, this is somewhat lengthy. Weapons Training In order to slay monsters, I must be fit and dextrous with my weapons. Training is comprised of: 50 squats per day [sugar craving squats count to this] 10 single leg balances per leg per day 2 weightlifting classes / wk [M, Sa] 2 strength workouts / wk [W + ? ] 1 yoga class / week [su] bonus points if I go to stretch class on Th Defeat the Sugar Demon I love carbs, and sugar, and donuts, and basically any dessert that doesn’t involve bananas. I also get mood swings and generally feel like crap when I eat these things. I did the 21DSD last month and I did not crave sugar while I was on it. In order to slay this Sugar Demon, I must: Do two 21DSDs with the following exceptions: Berries & oatmeal ok 2 drinks allowed on dates Drinks at Camp NF Mom’s birthday meal Attend 2 meetings / week Avoid stress / emotional eating Journal daily Meditate daily [even 2 min counts!] 20 squats whenever I want anything off plan Vanquish the Dating Anxiety Dragon Long story short, I have serious mental blocks when it comes to available men I do not know well and closing the deal. I shall vanquish this dastardly dragon by completing the following tasks: Message 5 men / day, except for week 1 which will be: sign up for PoF sign up for match update OKCupid profile 5 min tinder / day 1 date / week 1 hookup / mo OTHER BOSS QUESTS: Mutant Koala [Australian Drop Bear]Renew PassportApply for TSA precheck / global entry [requires new passport]Apply for visas [requires new passport] The Hellion HoardFollow decluttering schedule [TBD] HOA-AAAAAH HorrorBalance checking accountFollow up with Scott re:condo meeting minutesAsk Mark to call / contact owners to be on a committeeCall AT&T re:business lineReply to Anthony re: condo management TPS TitanProcess RH exit paperworkProcess GC exit paperworkProcess TA exit paperwork

Last challenge kinda ended with a fizzle. There were (are) legitimate reasons for this but I think it also means it's time to simplify my goals....and get schwifty Rick and Morty is the story of an (absolutely) mad scientist (Rick) and his grandson (Morty) as they galavant around the dimensions causing havoc. It's also about family, life not working out the way you imagined, taking risks, and not caring what anyone else thinks. Now...lets get to the actual goals: Goal 1: Get Schwifty Some times life is tough. And I get lost. But meditation brings me back into the present moment and reminds me that I don't need to know the where everything is going all the time, I just need to put one foot in front of the other. Five Meditation session per week. Goal 2: Build a Better Robot Be a robot. Bleep Bloop Blop. Make a list. Do the things on the list. Rinse. Repeat. 2 hour blocks helps. 5 lists/2 hour blocks a week. Goal 3: Portal Gun Creative works are portals to other worlds. Do one creative thing a day. 5x per week. Goal 4: Lil Bits 3 meals a day. Moderation and smaller portions. Cutting down on snacks (up to 3 a day in week 1, 2 a day in week 2, 1 a day in week 3, 0 a day in Week 4). (This goal may be changed) Goal 5: The Rick-est Rick Gratitude statements 5x per week. Inspiration 5x per week. LET'S DO THIS *BURRRRRP*

Hey Everyone, I'm Ash (like the guy from Pokemon, but without the hat). I was part of a challenge last year, but ended up dropping out in the second week because I found out my grandmother (who I'm extremely close to) has cancer. It felt like my whole world crumbled. So I needed to drop out and regroup. But coming back this time feels even harder than it was last time. There are a few aspects of my life that I know are going to be incredibly challenging for me over the next few weeks. I want to share them with you so that I can help get a bit of perspective if things start going wrong, because I don't want these things to become excuses. First, I'm about 3 months closer to my wedding, slated for October. The wedding is causing my huge amounts of stress, and I'm eating everything in sight as a result. Second, there's a ton of financial strain - I got a part time job to help with the wedding, so I'm working a full time job to pay for expenses, a part time job to pay for the wedding, and with the added strain of hospital visits and travelling in to the city (about 20 minutes away) to be with family, I've needed to take up some freelancing work on the side. Money is tight! Third, my anxiety, which I've successfully been managing for about 3 years, is now through the roof. I have regular anxiety attacks, and I'm so easily exhausted. Getting out of bed seems like an insurmountable feat most days. Fourth, my future husband just applied for a job, halfway across the country. He's a fire fighter, so there's a huge process when you apply. You have to write a bunch of tests and do some physical tests and then go for interviews and things, but the point is he applied. And if he manages to get through al the testing and score a spot on the department, we'll be moving. He's under a ton of stress right now, so I'm trying my best to support him. On the plus side, it means we should be able to hit the gym together while he gets his training in. I think at this point, I've had just about enough. I know my anxiety would be better managed if I ate right and got some exercise. And I know that it will only help me look my best for the wedding. My grandmother has been such a trooper, and she's such an inspiration for me to suck it up and do better. So it's time to set some goals! Main Quest: Lose 40 pounds Somehow, I gained 40 pounds over the past three years. Don't ask me how it happened. It was like one day I could pass for a bikini model, and the next I was weighing everything in my house because I thought the scale was lying to me. The weight has got to go. I know it's impacting my health. Goal One: Get to the gym! The gym is a terrifying place. That might be the main reason I've only gone about 6 times in the 9 months I've had a membership. With money as tight as it is, I've got to justify the expense. I plan to go to the gym Monday, Thursday, Saturday. Mondays I'll have to go alone, but Thursdays and Saturdays I can go with my partner. My focus at the gym is weights. I can barely lift my work bag as it is, so there is a lot of work that needs to be done here. Goal Two: Yoga This month, I plan to actually finish the 30 day yoga challenge. I know that yoga helps keep my anxiety down, so this is going to be key for me. Goal Three: Water I've been getting much better about drinking water regularly. I went from not being able to drink more than a glass of water without giving up, to be able to comfortably finish two 600mL bottles every day. A huge improvement! But I slack off when I get stressed, and so I'm going to be keeping track in my planner whenever I finish a bottle of water. Goal Four: Walk the Dog Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday and Sundays are going to be "walk the dog" days. The poor guy has been cooped up for months, and he's starting to go a little bonkers. It's good for me and good for him! Goal Five: Paper Flowers We're making paper flowers for our wedding in order to keep costs low. They take a long time to make, but they are totally worth it. I need to show a few people how to make them, buy all the supplies, and then get them done. I'm hoping to have 15 flowers done by the end of this challenge. I feel like there are a million other things that I need to put on this list, but I think this is a good start. February 1st is feeling a lot like January 1st to me. Let's get to it!

Hey all! I'm Huntress. I used to hang around these parts back in 2013, when I was lifting, obstacle racing and eating clean. Since that time, I fell out of lifting, into indoor rockclimbing, into roller derby and most recently... into being a couch potato. If I look at my old progress pics, I've pretty much gone back to square one. I'm here again to turn that around. And although slimming down is nice - I can't deny it - it's not my primary motivation. What motivates me is my desire to have a body that can do cool stuff, whether that's a heavy deadlift or delivering an epic roller derby hit. Since I'm no longer a newbie to the world of fitness or mindful eating, you'd think I'd just jump straight back into it by busting out some kettlebell swings and downing a kale-chia-kombucha smoothie, right? Well... I'd like to, but I have these crappy chronic diseases called depression and anxiety, and they've been raining on my parade pretty hard these last few months. So I need to take it slow, and focus on sustainable change that won't overwhelm me or give me panic attacks. Main quest: At the moment, my main big goal is to do a four-day hike in south-east Tasmania with my partner, as a 30th birthday gift to myself... I turn 30 in February, a few days after this challenge ends. I've come to the bitter realisation I need to shape up a bit to do that, but I still plan to do the hike before the end of April. Lifestyle quests: sleep, move, eat 1. Sleep My sleeping habits are awful. Improving them will improve my mental health as well as lay a foundation for good choices throughout the day. On weeknights (Sun-Thurs), in bed by 10.30, for lights out at 11. On weekends (Fri-Sat), lights out at midnight, unless I'm out partying, which happens only rarely.No computer while I'm in bed before sleep. All I can do with my computer is put it beside my bed and play online lectures until it's time for lights out, as this helps me sleep. On weeknights, before going to bed, follow this routine. 2. Eat This is where I'd like to see the biggest change during the challenge. I've been eating tons of crap at the moment. Now I'm on holidays I'm eating pretty well but the challenge will be keeping it up when I go back to work next week. Week one: plan two healthy snack boxes for work: one of snacks for under my desk, one of fresh fruit and veg for the fridge. Buy ingredients for snack boxes, take into work over the weekend and get set up for the week. Bring in lunch at least 2 days. Home-cooked meals (either me or partner) 5 nights per week. Week two: Keep snack boxes topped up. Bring lunch at least 3 days. Home-cooked meals 5 nights per week.Week three: Keep snack boxes topped up. Bring lunch at least 4 days. Home-cooked meals 5 nights per week.Week four: Keep snack boxes topped up. Bring lunch at least 5 days. Home-cooked meals 5 nights per week.3. Move I'm really not sure what to do with this one so I'll keep it simple. 3 hours of physical exercise a week. 2 hours of this needs to be vigorous exercise (running, walking up a steep hill at a decent page, rollerskating fitness, etc). 1 hour can be walking at a relaxed pace. Side quest: the big adventure/s I need to bed this down a bit more, but my partner and I are settling what we'll do for my 30th (it involves being... not where I am, and that's as far as we've gotten. Cripes!), and when we'll do our big hike. My side quest will involve: Settling on dates.Making hotel and flight bookings for my 30th weekend.Revising my leave so I can do the hike later (my work is flexible about these things).Costing and budgeting.Anyway, I think that's it for now Huntress out.

As the header says, this challenge is about commitment. I've taken a look to what I've done this year, and I see an on and off pattern, specially with exercise. It's true that many times bad health was involved, but I also see that I kind of use it as an excuse to postpone a restart. So, from this moment, I commit, I'll put exercise first for the next 4 weeks (yes, 4 weeks, that's correct. Am I a rebel or what?). I will only be excused if I have to work extra-hours off my schedule or if I feel sick (but I won't!). This means that there are other goals, but they come in second place and some of them are there to help the exercise goal. So: Goal 1. Being active. I'll allow myself a rest day, full rest day, but the other 6 days some kind of exercise must be done. I think in such a way I'll see results and that will encourage me to follow through. I hope my morning routine will help too (goal 2). First week: Establish the routine of walking a mile every morning (it's part of the morning routine). DONE! Go for a run at least once. Better if twice. DONE! 1 strength workout. DONE! In fact I did TWO! Second week: A mile a day. DONE! Go for a run at least once. Better if twice. Two days of tap practice at home. DONE! 2 strength workouts. DONE! Weeks 3 and 4: A mile a day. Or more if I've got time. Week 3: DONE! Week 4: DONE! 2 running days. Tap practice at home. Week 3: DONE! Week 4: DONE! 2 strength workouts. GMB Integral Strength. Week 3: DONE! Week 4: DONE! Workouts, both strength and running, include Focused Flexibility. What about tap? I am not sure whether I'll be able to take lessons this year, my schedule is not clear yet. If I can't go, then I'll try to practice at home now and then. Neighbours are going to hate. Points: 2 STA points max. for completing all the running workouts. 2 STR points max. for completing all the strength workouts. 1 DEX point max. for tap practice or lessons. Goals to help with exercise: Goal 2. Establish a morning routine. If I don't give myself the opportunity to think and chose to be lazy, maybe, only maybe, I won't be. The routine will organize my morning from waking up til it is time to go and prepare lunch. I want to create the feeling that tasks are somewhat linked and one leads to the next, so there's no room for procrastination and/or laziness. The routine starts with no snoozing in the morning and moves through meditation, walking, breakfast, reading, tidying up, music practice and exercise and many other little tasks, like taking my vits or feeding grumpy cat. If I don't waste time and follow the schedule I will have around 1 hour free before lunch to do whatever I want (like checking NF threads?). First week: DONE! Second week: DONE! Third week: DONE! Fourth week: DONE! Points: 2 WIS max. Goal 3. Eating. Tasks to be done: meal planning. Breakfast DONE!, lunch DONE! and dinner DONE! find a place that would supply me of bones for making broths; I only prepare them when I buy a whole chicken, that's not enough. And I want to try beef stock; DONE! put on fire the candy-bread kiosk on the ground floor; or maybe not, not everybody would understand my decision... keep on reading “Nourishing traditions†and think what I want to apply of what I read there; SOAKED DOUGH BREAD (done!)/MUFFINS (done!)/SCONES AND FERMENTED VEGETABLES (done!) stay away from sugar and bread: 3 days on the first week DONE!, 4 the second DONE!, 5 the third DONE!, and finally 6 the last one DONE! . If I get there, then I could try the following challenge to stay at 6-7 clean days. The better I eat, the more impact my exercise routine will have in my body. Once more, commitment. Points: 2 CON points max. for completing the suggested tasks (0.5 points each). Goals unrelated to exercise: Goal 4. Music practice and stage fright. Either “The hibbiee-jibbiees†or the “Sonata Appassionataâ€, or both, will be uploaded to soundcloud before the trimester ends. This way I'll have to commit (that word again!) to everyday practice and won't let stage fright aside until concerts season. Points: 2 CHA and 1 WIS points max. To obtain when one or both pieces are uploaded to soundcloud. Goal 5. Personal projects. I'd like to work on “Metabolic regulation†and “Hobbitinn†regularly. I won't decide a fixed schedule for them because they are part of leisure time. I hope my morning routine will establish well and help me find some moments for this during the week. If not, I'll work on weekends. Also, they can go in my “rest breakfast while reading†space in the morning, though I don't usually feel awake enough for that (maybe the previous walk in the fresh morning will put a remedy to that). 1 Metabolism regulation chapter per challenge (unless it is a difficult or long one, then half) and 1 paragraph of Hobbitinn every week. Points: 1 CHA max. Goal 6. Autumn is cool too. I can't go out everyday or hike the whole weekend now (why not, indeed?) but I'll try to plan some activities to keep enjoying being outdoors. First week: 2 activities. Second week: 1 activity. No activities during weeks 3 and 4 Wrong! Went to the Cervantian fair at the end of week 4! Points: 1 STA and 1 WIS points max. GOAL IN THE BACKGROUND. ANXIETY There are a lot of goals here. I have to go to work, too. Anxiety can appear. Probably will do. So, as I did last year, if I feel anxiety starts to pile up -because it's too much, because I have some trouble at work, because whatever- challenge stops and only the anxiety related activities go on. That includes my daily habits of relaxing, breathing and resting, and meditation, walking in the sun (so not necessarily right after I wake up), and aerobic exercise. Anxiety peaks. First week: none. Second week: one. Third week: three. Fourth week: three. Anxiety attacks: First week: none. Second week: none. Third week: none. Fourth week :none. Each time I realise anxiety has piled up and I get to stop it before it goes too far, I get an extra 0,5 WIS point. That's it. I think that's what I need. Now let's get the job done! SECOND 4-WEEKS CHALLENGE: http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/70900-commitment-zenlara/?p=1673956

I've always wanted to and tried to work out, and this summer/fall has been the only consistent time I've done it. But I've always dealt with a massive block to this and that is my anxiety. Working out makes me feel horrible. For years whenever I've tried, I've felt like complete s*** afterward and had to walk it off for half an hour to calm down. And this wasn't a physical thing at all, just severe emotional anguish. I don't know if this is really anxiety or not. It's more accurately described as deep, deep feelings of wrongness and horror for no reason. I'm not actually afraid of anything in particular. But anxiety is the closest description I've got. I know I could be doing so much more if I didn't have to take breaks in the middle of exercise just to calm it down, and if I didn't have to take an entire week off occasionally because I was too physically worn down from an attack to do anything at all. This is so frustrating to me, and keeps me from being who I want to be. And it's not just something I can power through, if I don't let myself deal with it it'll become worse and worse, and be a threat to my mental health. Does anyone have any experience dealing with similar things? Everyone says working out is supposed to release endorphins, and help with stress. But it's the exact opposite with me, where I'll just be ready to die from the emotional pain it gives even when the soreness is appealing to me. I'm thinking about seeing a doctor for this.

I am a 28 year old man who has been struggling with anxiety, stress and self doubt. Most of my days are messy and I am inconsistent in doing things. So I am using this challenge to tame my monkey mind, increase fitness and to be more productive Main Quest: Become mentally strong and mindful Quest 1: Meditate 5 minutes per day. I have never done meditation consistently and I don’t know too much about meditation. Here I am doing a basic meditation of focusing on the breath. I want to increase my knowledge about meditation by end of this challenge Measurement: A = 5 minutes for 6 days, B = 5 minutes for 5 days, C = 5 minutes for 4 days, Fail= below 4 days Quest 2: Read some self-help book at least 20 minutes per day. I have completely read only one book in my life time. I have started reading many books but never completed. So I am using this quest to completely read at least one book. . Measurement: A = 20 minutes for 6 days, B = 20 minutes for 5/4 days, C = 20 minutes for 3 days Fail= below 3 days Quest 3: Do beginners bodyweight workout 4 times per week allowing a one day interval after a workout day. I am never consistent in doing any workout, so I am using this challenge to develop a habit of doing workout. Measurement: A = 4 days per week; B = 3 days per week, C = 2 days per week Fail= Below 2 days Life Quest: To get a better job by increasing my knowledge. I also struggle with consistency in my studies. I usually study whenever exams are near just to pass the exam. I have joined a partime course for getting a better job. The chance of getting a better job mainly depends on my knowledge in subject. Classes are only on the weekend so I need to study during the weekdays which I rarely do. So I am using this challenge to consistently study something every day. Measurement: A = 30 minutes for 6 days, B = 30 minutes for 5/4 days, C = 30 minutes for 3 days Fail= below 3 days Motivation: For the last five years there have been no changes in my life, just the same messy and stressful days. So I am using this challenge to start a change in my life. Scarcity of self value cannot be remedied by money, recognition, affection, attention or influence. ~Gary Zukav

Alright, Where to begin? I work 50 hours a week, at two jobs, an Asian Restaurant and a Deli. I'm supposed to be studying game design but I may have just failed because I didn't submit any work in the last month because I've had an increase in migraines and was told two weeks ago that we have to move by Jan 16th. I suffer Severe Depression, and am on Meds for it. I also suffer Anxiety. I've been going through a rough spot of late due to all the stress and am struggling to not shut down. I could sleep all day, quite literally. I am a nerd, I love books, video games, art and alternative culture. I am a goth. I have bodys mods and want to get more. I am determined to slowly (because I honestly cant handle much more.) change my routines, to eat healthier and exercise. I am going to be positive and happier. I am going to meditate and control my thoughts. I am going to be more productive, and not let myself drown.

So I have begun my journey recently, started lifting weights and light cardio at my local gym across the street from my apartment. I told myself that I was going to go to my university's group fitness classes this week (I'm a staff member at a university), trying something new. The class I was supposed to go to, boot camp, started 16 minutes ago, and as you can tell from this post, I am not there. I don't know what it is. This happened on Monday too, where I literally pulled up to the group fitness place for a yoga class (something I'm already comfortable doing in a group environment at a different studio), and just sat in the car as I watched students go inside. My pulse was racing, my breath was shallow, my whole body felt stuck in dread. Then today happened. It's a mixture of social anxiety, of fear of failure, of not wanting to work out with students I might know (small university, power dynamics between professionals and students, etc., etc.), and I just couldn't make myself do it. Now I'm hating my brain for working against me, and I don't know what to do, and I don't want it to discourage me from continuing to do the weights/yoga I've been working with. How does anyone else battle their brain? I have a counseling appointment scheduled for Thursday, so we'll see what that digs up.

Hey Friends! I'm back for another challenge! Yay!! I levelled upon the last challenge which felt so good and now I'm ready to tackle another one. It had been a while since feeling successful, so I'm hoping I can build on the last challenge. My main quest is remaining the same drop 3% Body Fat. I dropped .5% during the last challenge. I'm committed to cleaning up my eating and really focusing on that. I've been struggling with severe Achilles tendinopathy in both legs, but I was finally cleared to start running (on a very limited - like couch-to-5k level). And I'm gonna keep on lifting. I recently signed up with MyFitnessPal (I had been using LoseIt! but was not finding much success). Anyway, my sons are back in school and their Jedi Mom is ready to level her life! Main Quest: Drop 3% body fat (already down .5%!) Mini-Quest 1: Start running. I will take this super-slow. I am looking into which program has the right intervals I'm looking for, so stay tuned! Mini-Quest 2: Stretch or do 10 minutes of yoga EVERY DAY! (This can include my PT for Achilles tendons). Mini-Quest 3: Keep lifting. Because of the school year and scheduling (mainly my wife's schedule), this may mean only 2x's week, but I want to stick to the Stronglifts 5x5 program as much as possible. Nutrition Quest: No dessert until my birthday. (9/29). Life Quest: This one is tricky. I will definitely finished Armada, probably this weekend, and I really want to finish a biography on William Taft (I'm reading a bio of each president in order). The problem is that I ordered Taft through inter-library loan and it hasn't appeared yet. So my goal is to finish Taft, but if doesn't arrive for another few weeks, I'll need something else. And to sum up how I stay positive, I'm just going to leave this Aquaman link here.

Words to live by : Inspired by the always awesome Shaarawy I am reformatting my quest by character. I think it will make a bit more sense this way. Also some of these are more like daily guidelines. Still figuring out how to make them actionable. Grading is on a do/do not basis. Quest: Finn/Fionna—think less, do more! Finn and Fionna are heroes who know who they are and what they want out of life. They avoid mental gymnastics. I strive to emulate their straight forward attitude and ability to deal with REAL problems. “ I don't need to feel like I'm waiting to be noticed. I know who I am and I'll know what I want if and when it ever comes along.†-Fionna, "Fionna and Cake" “I’m all about stupid!†-Finn, "The Real You" -Actionable step: Go for a morning walk, connect with my physical self -Goal: Stay in the moment, don’t overthink things. Actionable Step: Believe in myself because I am awesome! Decide at the beginning of every day, in writing, that it will be a good day and that I choose to believe in myself -Actionable Step: Weight training 2x a week, Pilates 2x a week, 1 rest day Quest: LSP—Love myself LSP is awesome. She is full of self confidence and sass. Goal: no physical or mental picking Goal: using food as self love but in a positive healthy way. showing myself I care about myself by making good food choices what this means: 3 meals a day/ no snacking primal/low carb (50-100 grams a day)one salad a day (visiting veggie village)food is fuel (no emotional eating) 3 cheat meals per week (thanks Snarkyfishguts for the inspiration)Savor my food- eat mindfullyhappy cooking time! Quest: Magic Man— some people are just jerks! For those who don't watch the show, Magic Man is a magic dude (well, duh) who is a huge jerk. In his first episode on the show teaches Finn that some people are just jerks. Then in a later episode it's revealed he was banished to Ooo because he "used to be cool" until the love of his life died and he become a bitter jerk who turned all of the water on Mars into hair (and when the Martians tried to drink it they went bald). (yes I watch this show way too much because I wrote that whole paragraph from memory) ANYWAYS, he could have come back to Mars "If you had just learned to care about living things again," but "Instead, you bummed around Ooo, acting like a jerk for 200 years." Goal: Accept that some people are just jerks and don’t let it bother me because I am awesome! And it is good that I care about other people(but not necessarily their opinions). Actionable steps: Practice letting go at any opportunity. Get mad? Let go. Accept what is. Quest: Marceline- Creative Outlet Marceline is a killer musician (heh) and I've always wanted to do music. I've sung for a long time but have always been too afraid of people judging my voice of my music. This is me taking back my creative space. Goal: Having a creative outlet. Balance the sad and the happy and create awesome art! Actionable Steps: This one is easier to measure because I have to do ONE creative thing per day. Doesn't matter how long or how much, just do SOMETHING. Write a sentence, practice guitar for one minute, paint, draw, ANYTHING. Try to get immersed in creating, let go of judgment and have fun! Quest: Jake the Dog- Eliminating Desire Jake is pretty much always relaxed and goes with the flow. During my first challenge I experienced this type of zen and it was amazing. I would like to get back to that place. I know I can. “What are you doing?†“Eliminating desire from my heart, it helps pass the time†-Finn and Jake, “Marceline’s Closet†“Sucking at something is the first step towards being sort of good at something†-Jake, “His Hero†“Listen to your melon heart!†-Jake, “The Tower†Goal:The Jake quest is about trusting my intuition, continuing with meditation, and letting myself be in the moment. Being okay with my journey as it happens. Letting go of trying to control everything and just being Goal: Each day is an experiment, approach the day without judgement or emotional baggage ​Actionable Steps:Daily meditation sessions, Daily journal using 2 hour blocks system. Actionable Steps: Have Fun!! Quest: Ice King - Embracing Sadness Ice King is probably the saddest character on Adventure Time. He is a portrait of depression and anxiety. I would like to try embracing the difficult parts of myself and feel comfortable with them. “That's right. M.M.S. Runs through all magic users.I hung out with scores of them, all displaying varying degrees of magic… Madness... And sadness. Studying these symptoms could lead me to their underlying cause, and then I'll control the forces that hold sway over Simon.†-Betty, “You Forgot Your Floaties†Goal: Embracing the sad. I want to embrace sadness that passes or even embrace my depression as a part of me and not try to “fix†being sad but just to let myself BE sad. This is not an everyday thing, this is only when sadness occurs naturally. Actionable steps: Really feeling sad when it naturally arises MORE GIFS:

In several of the stories that I love, the hero must face a near-insurmountable number of stairs. For Link, it's the final spire of Zelda's overrun castle, Ocarina of Time around his neck, sword in hand. Up and up the stairs he went. Within the forest, Utena climbs the Mirrored Arena, an ever-winding spiral of steps, to defend her claim to the Rose Bride. At the end of all the worlds, Roland faces the Black Tower, the fall and rise of each staircase running him ragged. Those don't all have the same ending, though. Link faces the boss for the final time. Utena makes the journey several times with different foes. Roland faces his greatest adversary, and himself. I'm fighting a lot right now, and it's done some bad things to my health. I struggled through the last challenge. I'm not happy that I haven't lost weight. Thing is, I don't want to give up. I've seen that making these changes and putting in the work can have results. It's really easy to undo those results, too, if I'm not consistent. So. No more excuses. No more "My anxiety hurts, I'll just snack instead." No more "I'm stiff I just want to sit on the couch." No more "It's too hot to cook, let's go out." Especially because I do NOT eat smart at the places I go. Goal: 5 lbs. That's it. I did it the first challenge. I'll do it again, and more. Clean Your Guns: BBWW Tu/Th/Sa @ .20 for potential 3.6 to STR. Ifrit won't let you cheat or bail. Do it when you get home, Ever. That ass doesn't hit the couch unless it's sweaty. Shadow Puppets: Steps or Yoga M/W/F @ .25 for potential 4.5 to DEX. Stress and anxiety have been leaving me sore and crunched-up. Stretch on days when this is an issue; use Netflix for at least 20+ minutes. If tension/movement are not an issue, walk loops in the park until hitting the stepcounts goal. This is the part where you make Ifrit go. You help him, he helps you. Love That Lon-Lon: Food tracking. All day e'ry day at .1 for potential 4.2 to CON. Work at elimating one 'problematic' food item per week. Follow beginner keto/paleo guidelines. Make a Dress Out of a Tablecloth: You Want To Do How Many Cosplays Now? With the next con looming right at the end of this challenge, that's my Personal Quest. That's my boss fight for this round. With that in mind, each character completed will be 1 to CHA, with 3 points total. 1 hour each working day, 4 hours weekends. You Caught a Fairy! That final .3 left over will be for WIS, should I manage to finish a book during this challenge.

Hello my fellow Rangers, I have been extraordinarily poor about posting - not cool and I'm sorry. I am recommitting to posting and staying in better touch with this community because it makes me a better person. In the past, my challenges have focused around running and preparing for a half-marathon in October. Well that goal has been sidelined because my Achilles' tendons (yes, both legs) have rebelled and I need time to rehab. The good news is that the doctor gave me the green light to keep lifting! She encouraged me to find other cardio as well. Overall Goal: Cut body fat by 3% Mini-Quest 1: Keep on my lifting schedule (Stronglifts 5 x 5) which means lifting 3x's a week. (Strength points) Mini-Quest 2: Stretch my Achilles' tendons every day. (Agility points) Mini-Quest 3: Read The Compassionate Samurai. The Quartet: Orchestrating the Second American Revolution. (Wisdom points) I'm keeping it simple because I have tendency to overload, not post, get anxious, not post, get more anxious and give up. A little about me: I am an attorney who does regulatory compliance for a creditors' rights firm - at least that's my alter-ego. I'm married and have two wonderful boys who turned 6 and 3 earlier this month (July). I have severe anxiety and just adopted a dog (Fillmore) whom I am training to be my psych service dog. I'm a member of Academy and going to CNF2015!

Hello Druids! This is my second challenge but my first as part of a guild. This is part two of my journey learning how to take care of myself and well... care about myself. I guess it's a journey in learning self compassion. I learned in my last challenge that happiness is built from the inside out so I'm focused on re-inforcing my interior scaffolding. I’m hesitating on grading some these because self care should be its own reward. I won’t put a time limit or value judgement on most of these. What matters is my consistent and persistent effort. Some of parts of the quests are maintenance goals from the last challenge. As ever my primary goal is to become the person I want to be, one baby step at a time. I have listed some lesson objectives for each activity next to it, though of course there will be many more unplanned lessons throughout the challenge. Grading will be done as a percentage however the only failing grade is a zero, so if I do 50% that’s still a C because something is better than nothing. Going into this challenge I will shoot for 100% because it is possible but I do not expect myself to be perfect. Perfection is the enemy of progress. Quest 1: Mind Gratitude statements: letting of of the negative by focusing on the positive (New) total possible points: 42 Daily Meditation: total possible points: 42 Walk to Mordor: Miles from walking and running added weekly total possible points: 6 Quest 2: Body Overall Challenge Goals: +Maintaining previous challenge exercise schedule +1 more weight training session per week +Mindful Eating (Continued from last challenge) +Water (Continued from last challenge) +Daily Shower (New) Exercise activity every day Water Goal: 2L per day Grading : X/84L total points: 42 (fractional points awarded for this challenge) Maintain mindful eating Continue mindful eating, especially mindful of sugar. Using MFP to track my calories. Reporting food in my challenge thread every day. This was not an official part of the last challenge, but it helped a lot to clean up my diet. My diet is focused on whole foods, categories to be mindful are fruits, nuts and cheeses. I’m going with 1700 calories a day, revised based on my activity levels. So 11,900 for the week Grading: X/71,400 minus one letter grade for every 500 calories over total goal (so I have a buffer) total points: 42 (fractional points awarded for this challenge, -.25 points for every 100 calories over goal) Hygiene (New) Shower daily. This is a symptom of my depression. Showering (sadly) needs to be part of my self-care routine. I have to make the time for myself. total possible points: 42 Quest 3: Soul Chocolate Bar Challenge: One bar of my favorite chocolate bar (cadbury milk w/ caramel) spread over six weeks. I used to eat two of these in one sitting so one chocolate bar has to last the whole challenge. At a pace of approx. 3 squares per week total possible points: 6 Daily Inspiration: This is very centering. I started it informally last challenge and I would like to continue. total possible points: 42 No weed It’s aggravating my anxiety (New) total possible points: 42 Reading every day total possible points: 42 Total possible points for challenge: 402 Actual points total: ????? Life Quest: -POSITIVITY WALL -Creative Writing 3x per week, a sentence is fine. Progress is progress -Get ready for school- letter of intent Dr’s letters Dr’s paperwork beanie’s harness Beanie’s carrier

I have been taking anti-depressant medication for a while now. I upped my dosage in May and it really did wonders for my mood and emotional stability. Recently, though, I have been having a horrible time whenever I am preparing for bed. I often feel anxious to the point of having near panic attacks. I haven't had anxiety or panic attacks in nearly a year and they have just come out of the blue. Not to mention I sometimes get this odd flutter/lightheaded feeling that I could equate to a very minor episode of vertigo. Obviously I know that if they get bad enough I need to see a doctor, but I was wondering if there was anyone else out here who experience this. I usually tell myself that I'm worrying over something in my subconscious, but I can't think of a blessed thing that would make me so manic and anxious, that I would have these sort of fits and attacks before going to sleep. It's worse when I'm so tired that I can barely keep my eyes open, but for whatever reason my brain just won't allow me that restful sleep. I do have Trazadone, but I try not to take it until I absolutely need to which I haven't in quite some time. I'm not afraid of taking it, but I didn't want to become too dependent on it. Thoughts? Suggestions? Sparkles?

I struggle with severe depression and anxiety. My primary goal always is to make sure that neither prevents me from living my life. Mostly because I frequently feel worthless. Exercising has helped (along with medication and weekly cognitive-behavioral therapy), but I'm still working on overcoming some mental blocks. Okay so.... goal time: main quest: to take care of myself: mind, body, and spirit. goal 1: exercise 30 minutes 3x per week -escalated running c25K grading: A= 3/3, B=2/3, C=1/3 F=0/3 goal 2: meditation, 10 minutes 5x per week grading : A= 5/5, B= 4/5, C= 3/5, D=2/5 F=0/5 goal 3: 2L of water a day grading: A= 2L, B= 1.5L, C= 1L, D=.5L, F=0L other stuff: Weekly schedule template Monday: Pilates Tuesday:C25K Wednesday: Pilates Thursday: C25K (and Therapy) Friday: yoga + walking Saturday: C25K Sunday: weight training Life quest: creative writing 3x per week (any amount even a sentence, progress is still progress) grading: grading: A= 3/3, B=2/3, C=1/3 F=0/3 Be mindful, be grateful, be present.

Hello everyone! My name is Carter and I am a 33 year old woman living in St. Augustine, FL. I say 'woman' as it's my birth gender, but I associate with the male gender, so there's that. I usually call myself a guy/man, etc. BUT, with that out of the way - I am glad to be here! Nice to meet everyone. I have always been a long-time athlete. From a very early age I have ALWAYS worked out, been active, eaten well, etc. I actually have taken it too far in my youth and was not only anorexic, but an exercise bulimic. I have since gotten back to weight and found a healthy balance of diet and exercise. I have always been a swimmer, a runner, a surfer, a weight lifter, but I just seem to 'not care' anymore. As soon as I turned 30 - it hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm Lazy now. And I enjoy sleeping until the late afternoon/early evening. Waking up, showering, eating and doing nothing. It's the total opposite of how I have been my entire life. I want to change it and get back to working out, doing water sports (like kitesurfing, etc.) but I am ALWAYS hungry and have absolutely 0 energy. What is happening to me? I used to be a Scout who became a Warrior and now I am looking to turn myself into a Ranger. Any advice? Encouragement? Words of Wisdom? Please help a comrade in arms. Thanks.

The L.A.R.A. project How does one build a Lara? An actual Ms. Croft? Boob job and gunshots apart, there are two main things Lara needs to survive in her environment: control of anxiety in situations of danger and a strong and agile body. L.A. Lowering Anxiety. I've been rather in control of my anxiety levels, and maybe because of that, these last 2 weeks I've been a bit careless and worked less on it. And anxiety has started to pile again. I want to build both a peaceful mind and body, and I will do my best to achieve it. I'll work on all those things that make me feel better. The number of exercices/sessions proposed are the minimum to pass the challenge with a C. If I want higher grades I have to surpass those numbers. Meditation. 15 10-minutes meditations. Breathing exercise. Twice a day: 84 exercises. Relaxing exercise. Once a day: 42 exercises. This can include working on trigger points (back, jaw, feet). Mental rewards. 3 times a day: 126 rewards. Rest moments. 24 spans. This includes any activity that allows me to take a break from life events, such as reading in the patio, taking a nap, listening to some music, Feldenkrais exercises, self-massage... Work on affirmations or any other exercise from the anxiety workbook. It can also be reading some passages and reflecting on them. 21 exercises. Positive things list/Things to be thankful for list. 24 lists. Take anti-anxiety supplements. I have to assure myself I take every supplement regularly, so at least 30 times each. The exception will be valerian, which I'll be taking only when I'll need it to sleep better. Extra-fat. I'll try to take an extra dose of fat everyday, adding olive oil, avocados or coconut oil to meals. 30 doses. Stage fright work as needed: affirmations, visualization, breathing, power pose... I'll be active (R.A. goal). I'll use cardio exercise to burn anxiety if needed. R.A. Rediscovering Awesomeness. I've been reading my last year challenges and I feel I've lost that thrill and all that excitement about exercise. I want to recover that, and make every workout really count. The number of sessions proposed for this goal are not the minimum but the ones needed to grade with an A, so this differs from L.A. goal. Full strength workouts. 6 workouts. I'll work on both upper and lower body. I have a wide range of exercises to choose from. I'll include some of the easiest gymnastic exercises appearing in Floor 1, which I'd love to retake this summer. I have to be strong enough, though. 5 workouts, B. 4 workouts, C. Less, F. Upperbody workouts. 9 workouts. These will be shorter ones, focused on upper body strength, because is what I need to work the most, and they will be combined with some cardio activity such as tap dancing or running. 7-8 workouts, B. 6 workouts, C. Less, F. Tap. 9 practice sessions (includes lessons if taken). 7-8 sessions, B. 6, C. Less, F. C25K. 9 runs. I'd like to make it to the 7th week. 7-8 sessions, B. 6, C. Less, F. Rest days. 15. This includes mobility work such as regular stretching, Focused Flexibility, trigger points or Feldenkrais exercises, walking, going for a bike ride or simply doing nothing. Points: 2 STR points if I do all my strength workouts (full and upperbody). 2 points for a B, 1 for a C. 2 extra STR points if I get to do a push-up. 2 CON + 2 STA points if I get to the 7th week of C25K and finish it. 1 + 1 if B. No points for a C. 2 DEX point if I do all the planned tap sessions. 1 for a B. No points for C. 3 WIS + 1 CHA points if I complete my L.A. goal. 1 extra WIS point if I get to do more than the minimums in at least 5 of the items appearing in L.A. goal. Wish me luck!

Hey, So I'm assuming I'm among friends here, even some friends who were overweight before, or are overweight and struggling with it, or are even beating it. I'm sure there are people on here who have felt insecure about the way they look, too, so my question is, how do you guys deal with it? How do you embrace it? I've had family members and other people commenting on my looks for as long as I can remember. I used to be under 100 pounds, then got severely depressed and shot all the way up to 150-ish in four years, and my family has been commenting and calling me fat ever since. I've had total strangers tell me I'm ugly, and I've also had people tell me I'm one of the most beautiful people they know, but of course I think they're lying because they're my friends. I lost a lot of weight and gained a lot back, but I'm not nearly as heavy as I was in high school, so that's a plus. I always think that people are judging me on my appearance and especially my weight. I am scared to be noticed. I'm Miss Frumpy for a reason. Do I have to have a flat tummy again, dress up, and do my makeup every day to be worthy of notice? Somebody even told me once that I don't deserve an attractive partner until I do, and sometimes, with the whole prevalence of this "no fat chicks" mentality that a lot of guys seem to have, I feel like I wouldn't be able to get a partner regardless of whether or not I deserve one (Important note: dating is soooooo far from my main priority right now. The reason I mention this story is because it horrifies me that somebody felt that it was their place to say something like this, and that they felt totally comfortable doing it. It further confirms my belief that people see me and judge me for my weight, clothes, and on most days, complete lack of any makeup whatsoever, and that every time I was interested in somebody, my appearance was a huge factor in my rejection, as I have never not been rejected). Anyways, what do you guys tell yourselves to help you embrace who you are? I firmly believe that everyone deserves love and kindness, and yet I don't give myself any. How do you change a thought pattern that is so deeply ingrained? If any of you have stories that you want to share, especially if you think I could learn from them, I'd appreciate that so much. Of course, if you want to share so you have somebody else to cheer you on, I'm more than happy to do that, too. Thanks everyone, Fia

As some of you know, I've been a biiiiiit sick lately, and I've been having a hard time to recover myself from illness. Besides, I had a lot of work to do that remains undone, and now I am starting to think I should talk to my director and drop some things because time is running out and my strength is not back yet. My idea is to try to do the job (dance my choreo, play my concerts...) but not at the risk of my own health. If in these next 2 weeks I see my body is not recovering properly, I'll drop my side life quest and it won't mean I fail the challenge. It will be adapted. I'd like to rehearse and record the choreo anyway, even if it takes longer, because I want to do it and also see the result. I'll put the video here unless it is a complete mess -it won't. Maybe. Eeeer, no it won't. Sure. Sure? Main quest Goal 1 (main goal). Last crisis have been handled nicely, so this is the way to go: breath, meditate, rest, relax, slow down, give mental rewards, repeat affirmations, no critizicing. Little actions against anxiety everyday. Goal 2. Eat well, eat fatty, supplement wisely, sleep well. Goal 3. Move everyday, even if it is only mobility work. Walk, tap dance... Running and lifting when I'll feel ready. Side life quest Goal 1. Tap choreo. From Shirley Temple to Eleanor Powell in 3 weeks. Now, that's a challenge! Musical will take place on march the 26th. Goal 2. Musical practice everyday. Four upcoming concerts! Wish me luck!