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ElvenEngineer Feels Feelings
elvenengineer posted a topic in WarriorsWell, this will be a different challenge for me. It should maybe be in a different section, but.... I'm still lifting, and this feels like home. And that's nice. And I miss you peoples. As many of you know, I struggle with depression, and not wanting to feel feelings has always been a thing for me. For a lot of my life I was pretty sure I didn't have any. Therapy and meds have helped, and now I feel all the things, which I'm told is good. And I have a lot of little moments now where I just think - I'm really happy right now! and that's great, and that never used to happen. But when bad things happen, those are a lot more intense as well. I wasn't even going to do a challenge this time around, but then I saw Spezzy's, and I thought that if she can do it, so can I. Even if I am starting late. So here's the thing: My uncle passed away last Friday. And not a blood related one, one that I had by choice. I loved him, and I miss him, and I am going home in a couple weeks and was SO excited to see him and others while I was there, but he was definitely one of the ones on my "MUST SEE" list. It's been a couple years since I've seen him, and now I have all the regrets that I didn't make the trip earlier, that he left before I had a change to tell him how much I appreciated his presence in my life (I've been working my way down a list), that I'll never get one more hug. And then I'm also just.... sad. -------------------------------------------------- So, a challenge. Not just whining. Self-Care: Every day, do something Future Elvie will be happy Past Elvie did. I've been working to expand my definition of self-care, and this is my favorite one. Sometimes that's lifting, sometimes it's choosing not to lift, sometimes it's paying a bill, sometimes it's doing laundry... etc. Eat a full meal with a fruit or vegetable every day. Post here every day (I found "weekly" was too vague last time, and I just kept saying that I'd do it later haha). I'll post lifty stuff here too, of course