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For being a spotlight whore, this is really nerve-wracking, but this is something I feel like I need to do to be all in this time. I'm 20 years old, really ambitious and the classic overachiever. I was the homeschool girl who got all As and one B her entire education, took 10 different types of lessons, could outsmart you about politics, world events and history and then win the spelling bee. Yeah, THAT kid. Haha! I'm a junior politics/history major at Drake University, I'm a political activist, write for two political websites, work two jobs, co-founded a volunteer PAC, interned in D.C. this summer, have worked over 20 campaigns in the past 2 years and have went on choir tour over 10 times the past three years. Bottom line, I'm busy and very, very blessed. I've gotten to accomplish a lot in my short time. However, I am horrible....I repeat, horrible at maintaining good habits. I've struggled with my weight my entire life. I'm really hard on myself mentally and go through phases of really strict habits that pay off, and then I lose my way and gain the weight back. I've always been overweight and then junior and senior year, I lost a ton of it and then I've gained a bit back each year in college. I'm a libertarian, so eating healthy, being as natural as possible and being paleo are all very popular in our movement, so I started paleo last June. Not only did I lose 30 pounds in a month, I also stopped taking medication for what they thought was endometriosis. It was really just a gluten problem! I was having the time of my life and feeling invincible, living in D.C. and dropping weight pretty fast for me. Then I came back to Des Moines, started school, came back around my family (who are amazing cooks) and was around all the stress of my life again. I started cheating, little by little, and the weight creeped back on. I would go through spurts where I would try harder and lose some, and then I'd gain it back and the cycle would happen over and over. Basically, I know what to do, I'm just very inconsistent. I have a gym membership and when I work out, I kill it. I do about 45 min of cardio and over an hour of weight training. I drink lots of water on my good days and I never drink pop. I eat all natural, except for those cheats that sneak in, bringing my paleo/all natural ratio down to about 60-70%. I lose and gain the same 5 pounds every week. I use all natural products on my body, I don't drink water with fluoride, I take very careful care of my skin, hair, nails and teeth. I'm obsessed with fashion and can't wait to buy clothes in smaller sizes. I know exactly what to do, but I'm terrible about making it happen. I've set goals for myself to lose about 2 pounds a week throughout the year and I have a weight goal on the 10th of every month. I have goals in mind, like working out at least 4x a week, eating all paleo, drinking 6 glasses of water a day and cutting out snacking. I'm just frustrated by my lack of discipline and consistency. I am so ready to change and I know that I owe it to myself to do so. I think I'm pretty, but sometimes I feel so incredibly ugly and unattractive because I'm overweight and I know that that's all some people see. I come off as extremely confident and that's the case most of the time because I have a big, Italian, I don't-care-what-the-hell-you-think, tough-liberated-political-woman-attitude, but sometimes it's just a front because honestly, I don't think I'd ever want to date me or think I'm beautiful. I'm ready to do this because I see my future self and how gorgeous and care-free I could be if I wasn't held back by this self-consciousness due to my weight. I'm all about living boldly, and I know that this is holding me back. I've been doing this for a while, but I'm sure as heck no pro at it. If you have any tips, advice or tricks you'd like to share with me, I'd be more than happy to have it! I'm looking for friends, mentors, accountability partners here. This is too important to me to let it slide this time. I'm off to write my list of reasons why I want this more than ever! Thanks for reading -kj