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Happy New Year Nerds!!!! I am so excited about 2016. 2015 was an amazing year for me, I went to Camp Nerd Fitness and it really reshaped the way I view my life, my goals and fitness. I also was luckily enough to join an amazing team of Ranger Ambassador’s on the boards here and get more involved in NF which I am really enjoying. I finally started power lifting, something I’ve been working up to basically since I joined NF via body weights and dumbbells. Real world related, I went to Alaska and got a new cat. I got engaged. My fiancé and I got our own place when our roommates moved out. All in all, a great year. I am so ready for 2016 to be even more amazing! This year, I decided to set yearly goals, which I have never done before. I’ve admittedly been neglecting my epic quest, not because I haven’t been doing stuff on it (I have been ever so slowly crossing stuff off) but because I’m not sure how to use it. So I’m converting it into an overarching epic quest list AND using it to track my yearly goals as well! Then I can use those yearly goals to work out the details of my 4-week challenges. My epic quest/yearly goals link is in my signature but I’m also adding them here for reference: 2016 GOALS >>Read 30 books >>Squat my body weight >>Deadlift 200lb >>Apply to join Big Brother Big Sisters of America >>Climb Mt. Washington >>Climb Mt. Marcy >>Climb Mt. Katahdin >>Make Borderlands Cosplay >>Pay off Discover Card >>Create a will & a living will Now this may seem contradictory to everything I just wrote, but the majority of my specific missions this challenge are not going to be directly correlated with my 2016 goals. Winter break was tough for me, I had some personal headspace stuff to deal with in addition to redoing EVERYTHING in the apartment. This still isn’t quite done actually. So I am going to use January as a mental and physical cleanse month, so I can have a clean plate to start out on and really start building towards my goals in February. I need to clear my brain clutter as well as some physical clutter (which is directly contributing to my brain clutter) and I also need to detox my body of some of the holiday crap I just kept shoveling into my face (and I can only use “winter bulk†goals to excuse a very small portion of that). Seriously, this was me the last week of 2015: And I can feel my body being really sad about it. Time to get my energy back! I struggled with a while to decide on a theme for this challenge. I had about 5 different ones that I wrote up complex scoring systems for, utilizing variations on the boss system I did last challenge (which I LOVED), and one where it was really writing based since I had a ton of fun writing up my story last challenge as well, but decided that since my goal for this challenge is cleansing and simplicity… I am going to go with no theme. Just me, myself and my goals

Main Quest: The Quest for the Uncreaking Body! GUARDIANS of the micro-GALAXY Goal 1 (diet): Eat All of the Vegetables -- pick 2 cups each day from the 21-day Fix list Ate 2 Cups Vegetables per Day (52/52) 100%100% Goal 2 (diet): Replace Soda with Tea Chose Tea Over Soda (26/26) 100%100% Goal 3 (fitness): Move Naturally -- Get up to Swim Daily Swim Each Day (17/26) 65.4%65.4% Bonus Fitness Goal -- Move Naturally -- Drylands Daily *Bonus Fitness (17/26) Dry Lands* 65.4%65.4% Level Up at Life! Goal 4: Save Money -- Via Coffee Shop Shenanigans -- Replace sugary drinks with brewed coffee or Espresso and lemon Chose Brewed Coffee (26/26) 100%100%

‘Agent Fox, it’s time for you to get back on the field’, Boss B says, and Fox can’t help letting out a small gasp. Finally! Action! Adventures! ‘What’s the mission about?’ Fox asks eagerly. ‘Pants.’ ‘Uh… Pants?’ ‘Yes, Fox, your mission is about collecting pants. The Bootylicious Museum of Great Butt-ain has recently been robbed. They lost their most valuable workout pants that were worn by the most victorious Squat Master of the nation, Emerald ‘Iron Glutes’ Jones.’ Fox looks at her boss suspiciously. She has trouble finding her own pants in the morning from the mess that’s her room – and now Boss B wants her to find pants? ‘Our intelligence believes that the pants are located in the town of Lilla Rumpa. The thief is a pants collector called Samantha Snakes. We believe she’s going to sell the pants, and is currently looking for a potential buyer. Your mission is to observe her, learn about her contacts, and find out where the pants are before she sells them. Once you learn the location, you are to report back to us.’ Fox is getting more and more nervous. This mission might require, oh no, socializing. ‘You will get details on your way. Any questions?’ ‘Yes, Boss. Is it true that the passports of Great Butt-ain have pictures of their buttocks instead of their faces?’ ‘Fox. This is your possibility to prove that you can handle a mission. Don’t make me regret this.’ Fox nods, and gets up. As she’s leaving the room, Boss B calls her name one more time. They share a moment of silence, and then Boss B talks for one last time. ‘Yes. The passports of Great Butt-ain have pictures of buttocks instead of faces. Now, go! The nation needs you!’ ** ~:Mission Grab the Pants:~ Main target: hit 72 kg (currently 74 kg) Reward: new workout pants! Goal #1: Move Like Them Samantha Snakes takes part in a yoga camp every day. Fox needs to take part in the same class to learn about Snakes’s contacts. Follow through yoga camp every day No missed days: 10 points 1 missed day: 8 points 2 missed days: 6 points 3–6 missed days: 3 points Goal #2: Eat Their Food Fox needs to eat in the same places as Snakes. Snakes avoids sugary, processed foods, and stays away from dairy. Fox needs to learn to prepare similar foods. Stay away from excess sugar, dairy, and processed foods 5 days a week (2 small treats allowed per week)Try a new recipe every week 5 days: 7 points 4 days: 5 points 3 days: 3 points 1–2 days: 1 point 1 new recipe: 3 points Goal #3: Talk Their Way Fox needs to learn to talk Swedish, the main language of Lilla Rumpa. Read 3 Swedish texts every week. Write down words that are hard, and translate.Have a chat with someone before or after every Swedish class. 3 texts a week: 5 points 2 texts a week: 3 points 1 text a week: 1 point 1 chat every week: 5 points ** Max score for each week is 30 (10 * 3). Here we go!

Epic Quest: Run my own Business New Year=new energy, new life, and new adventure! I’m so excited for what this year will bring! I will be starting my own business in the spring. I have a lot to learn though and a lot of things that need to get done before I register my business. So here we go! Journey to the Bottom of the Ocean I'm going to the deep unknown this month, to start the new year right and to gain experience for my budding business. This is all about freediving and breath holding. I want to improve my flexibility along with my leg (tail) strength as well. I need to be powerful enough and have a great breath hold in order to explore the dark depths. Build Tail Strength My tail is quite heavy out of water and I can’t assume there will always be a sailor willing to carry me to and fro at my leisure. Now in the water it’s almost weightless, but I have to displace a lot water while I swim in order to propel myself faster or dive. I need to gain tail strength to lift my tail on land and to dive deeper on less air. M-strength training, W-yoga, F-body weight training. Swim the Distance They don’t call it 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea for nothing! I'm setting out to improve my endurance in and out of tail by swimming at least 300m a week (100m Monofin swim, 100m mermaid swim, 100m free swim). That's just the minimum, but I will be adding 25m each time I swim if I can. Training Under the Pressure Get it? The deeper you go the greater the pressure? But in all seariousness (oh yes I love terrible puns), this is only a pass or fail, unless it takes longer than expected. I will work on getting freediver certified this month. Send Word of my Journey’s End Once I return form my journey I must tell everyone what I've learned and what I've seen. At the end of the challenge once (if) I get certified, I will notify my agents along with sending my updated portfolio photos. Side QuestsWith any good Journey, there's always side quests to complete. These little add-ons will not give me any attribute stats, but will instead contribute to my XP once the EPIC QUEST page is launched. These are things I need to work often throughout the year. Quests are as follows: Linguistic Mastery Learn 280 Vocab words this monthGold KeepingSave $10 this monthKnowledge ExpansionRead 2 books this month

First and foremost, thank you in advance for all your help and support. I look forward to repaying you all with a little entertainment in the future (see Life Quest). Disclaimer: This may be a tad depressing, but it has a happy ending : ) Background Story: (The Beginning) When I was in high school I was a nationally competitive gymnast. Needless to say I was in fantastic shape. However, I lived in a home that had a healthy food regiment and didn't really eat out. Leaving for college, however, did a number on me. Junk food, soft drinks, and alcohol. It was a hard time balancing a small budget, having no car, and eating healthy, but I generally was physically active enough to retain most of my fitness. I had a great time, but towards the end things got very dark. (The Fall) Junior year my girlfriend at the time cheated on me with my best friend. To add insult to injury it was while I was in the same house, after I had bought them both dinner, when I had gone to bed early to get back to work early the next morning. Treason once I could handle, but twice? I was in a dark place for senior year of college. (Rock Bottom) My drinking became a problem as I numbed myself to the world around me. The numbness caused me to hurt others who did nothing but care for me. Then when I was sober enough to realize that, I felt even worse; I drank even more. I had met the woman I am currently with and, while I did not know at the time, plan to be with for as long as life allows. I nearly lost her to all my idiot actions that year. I knew that if I was ever going to be worthy of such an incredible person, I needed to change. (Hope) I decided on a sort of reinvention of myself. My first priority was academics and peace of mind. I decided to go to law school far away (in Michigan) from my college (in Florida), to eliminate anyone that could draw me back into that darkness. In short, it was a success: I got the grades; I got the girl (she's ended up coming to another [better] law school in Michigan); and I got the new life I wanted. (If you want to know more about what it takes to succeed in law school, feel free to PM me). (Start Loop) Yet, because fitness and health was not a priority, I was gaining weight and my shape was worsening. I didn't change my diet, nor did I stop drinking. Like a typical New Years resolutioner I bought an exercise system (Rip60) last year and finished it with pretty good results, but I was still The Fork Outrunner. Having run out of workout DVDs I fell off the workout boat and my bad eating/drinking habits caught up to me yet again. (Repeat) I've started and stopped 1) P90X, 2) Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and 3) Running since then... Main Quest: I want to break this cycle: Get fit, keep eating/drinking. Stop working out, keep eating/drinking. Get out of shape again/gain weight. Repeat. In short, I need discipline. I suppose this is my initiation into the Ranger's guild. 3 Specific Goals: 1) Eat better, drink less. My plan is to go paleo and booze-free weeks with weekends limited to a finite number of drinks/cheat meals. In order to accomplish this I will post proposed weekly food regiments and hold myself to them. Success or failure in this is going to be pretty dependent on accountability. Please help me construct reasonable meal plans and devise punishments for failure to adhere to them. 2) Improve Cardio. I'm constantly moving from one place to another so I never have a gym membership. Winter in Michigan is a runner's nightmare with black ice and below zero temperatures. I cannot afford to buy a treadmill and then proceed to move it everywhere I end up going. Therefore, jump rope. I'm doing the workouts in the Rebel Fitness Guide with jump rope as my cardio, and as my supplemental exercise on off days. I can barely do it for a minute straight, so my goal will be ten minutes of coninuous jump rope by the end of this challenge. I will post weekly bests along with my meal plan. 3) Improve Flexibility. While I'm quite happy with the warm up and cool down of the Rebel Workouts, I used to be a competitive gymnast. I'm frankly ashame of how inflexible I have become in relation to my past. Therefore, I will add my old gymnastics/martial arts flexibility regiment to my workout and off days. I will also post weekly bests on my splits in order to be held accountable. My belief is that each of these can be done regardless of my access to workout equipment, and will ensure that I can not fall off the boat. I will set alarms on my phone so that I can never forget. Side Quests: 1) Become a better cook with Paleo recipes. Try at least one new recipe each week. Report the results. 2) Game while standing. When I game I will try and remain standing to avoid sitting all day when I'm not exercising. Life Quest : I want to finally finish developing my magic routine and perform it from start to finish for an audience. I've been casually practicing magic, putting hundreds of dollars into it as a hobby, and never having more than a few isolated tricks to do. My goal is to develop, perfect, and perform a full 10 minute routine. I want to finish this by the end of this challenge and post a video for all of you to enjoy/critique. Motivation: I've always had a fascination with the jack of all trades (aka Batman). Being the best I can be at a variety of things has always brought me pride and pleasure. It is a point of pride then to be not just a Computer Engineer/Patent Lawyer/Archer/Magician but a fit Computer Engineer/Patent Lawyer/Archer/Magician. Being the best I can be, is being the happiest I can be.