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The creature that is slowly approaching Scalyfreak is magnificent. Graceful and shimmering pearlescent white, like moonlight given shape. It stops some distance away and watches quietly... like several of the demons Scalyfreak has encountered in her journey it does not speak, though the creature's glowing eyes shine with intelligence. A little bit unnerved by being scrutinized like this Scalyfreak slowly readies her shield. The creature is not behaving aggressively, and there's nothing hostile about its body language, but one can never be too careful... when the creature merely watches her, Scalyfreak slowly begins walking away, sideways, so she can keep an eye on it, shield raised but with her weapons still sheathed. There is no need to pick a fight with every creature she comes across after all, especially not one she can't for the life of her identify (though it is familiar in a vaguely annoying way). Those glowing intelligent eyes follow Scalyfreak as she carefully circles around, her hands well away from her weapons and in plain sight, and as she in turn watches the creature. Except the creature is not actually watching her, Scalyfreak realizes, with some surprise. It is staring at something behind her, staring with open hatred, while scraping one very sharp looking hoof repeatedly against the ground. And that gleaming horn also looks really sharp. And it's lowering in a threatening way, and... Scalyfreak is so focused throwing herself out of the way of the charge that the furious roar from somewhere behind her barely registers. Back on her feet and with sword in hand, she finds herself completely ignored and scrambling to get out of the way as Self-Indulgence, in her full demon form, struggles to fend off attack after attack from an enraged unicorn. 2020 was not a good year for me, for lots of reasons. In fact, when Heidi asked about it in a thread during the recent holiday challenge I described 2020 as “a horrific tragicomedy of disasters arriving like dominoes that fall one by one... each fall preceded by just enough of a pause that you start to relax in the false hope the domino will stay upright after all” In a fit of morbid curiosity I went back through the year and created a timeline of all the bad shit that happened throughout the year, either to me, or to me and Husband. I have put the timeline in a spoiler to make it easy for someone who is trying to avoid exposure to negative news and energies to avoid it, and also because the main reason I decided to write it out was a need for closure. Before you click the spoiler, be aware: I write my challenge posts in Word before posting them, and the content inside the spoiler covered three pages. Also be aware that I am actively involved in local politics and get stressed by political events, so they will be on the list. I ask everyone to please not comment on the politics in this thread. If you have questions, please send a DM. Also note that I have entirely left out anything stress-inducing that is related to, or caused by, my job. My job was not a new thing for 2020, though it remained stressful as usual. Interestingly, when I saw my doctor for my annual wellness check in early December, he informed me that living through a year that contained all the intensely stressful shit listed in the spoiler has actually lowered my blood pressure. I demanded a recheck, in case the meter was broken, but he insisted that based on the blood work and the health markers they look at, I am at this point in my life at the healthiest I have been since I started seeing him a few years ago. I have no idea how this happened, but it featured very prominently in the gratitude mini-challenge we did over the holidays. As for this upcoming challenge... in one of the last challenges in 2020, I came to the following realization: [O]ne of the biggest reasons for my mental health struggles has been this fight of mine against the reality we now live in. To constantly scream inside my head to the world that "THIS IS UNFAIR AND NEEDS TO END NOOOOWWWW!!" is exhausting, and completely counterproductive. I should have used all that energy and mental capacity to figure out how to adapt to the new reality we live in and will continue to live in. ...so that is what I am going to do. Accept the reality in front of me, accept that it will not change. Make it work for me instead of against me. Just like a proper lift is done against gravity but with the barbell, and swimming becomes easier when you work together with the water instead of fighting against it, this new pandemic reality will become easier to live in, if I work with what I have to work with instead of giving in to frustration and resentment over all that I have lost access to. To this end... let the weaponization begin! Sharpen the Mind Meditation and Mindfulness are the two powerful weapons that will keep the Flame of Anxiety at a low simmer, or lower, and help me face whatever 2021 throws at me with focus and determination. Mediation will therefor be done every day, preferably in the morning. Mindfulness will be applied to every task I can apply it to during the day, from makeup application to cooking to laundry folding, and everything in between. Strengthen the Body Because the human body is amazing in its adaptability and versatility, this goal has two parts. Part 1: Build endurance by walking every day. Happy Sidekick will assist towards this partial goal by providing reminders, motivation, and when all else fails she will resort to emotional blackmail by deploying Sad Puppy Eyes until I take her for a walk. (Happy Sidekick is a black labrador retriever. The sad puppy eyes are frighteningly effective.). Part 2: Increase muscle strength by doing workouts intended to do just that. This can be dumbbell lifting, or a resistance tube workout, or something involving only body weight exercises (including yoga). The type of workout is unimportant. Doing the workouts is what matters. For this goal, I need to do three strength workouts in a week. Focus the Soul The soul needs feeding and support, and when it is given these things, it becomes a powerful source of strength that can carry us through the deepest of dark moments and hardship. My soul is prefers to be fed a diet of music, all kinds of art (including makeup, cooking, baking, books, and video games), and human contact. It also needs to feel loved and appreciated, and needs to connect to other souls by doing things together, and by receiving and giving kindness in all forms. All of this makes this goal rather vague, but it also makes it very flexible. One very important part of this goal will be to find shared activities with Husband. We used to go out for date nights and date experiences, but with the pandemic still raging through our state, we are choosing to stay home, which means we need to find things to do together here. We have decided to start with something easy: Binge watching shows together. We're currently on season three of Cobra Kai, and season two of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Let 2021 begin!