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- Recent words of wisdom from a good friend. Introduction: Last month, a nuclear bomb went off in my life—I gave birth to my son. We’ve survived the first four weeks, but I’m struggling with creating new balance in my life especially after my husband has returned to work. So for this challenge, I’ve left my adventuring pack behind, and wandered into the druid’s grove, to focus on being, (un)becoming, and the transition into fallout. Around the time I gave birth, a blog post appeared that really spoke to me—it’s about Being—being who you are rather than always chasing for Becoming Someone. It sounds unaspiring, but I actually found it quite the opposite. I feel like I have been given permission to be right where I’m at. (And, when I asked myself the Hard Question of “what if this is all that there is”? I mean, I have to admit a pretty amazing life. Stupid hedonic adaption.) I still aspire. I still aim to inspire. But for the moment, I need to focus on being right where I am. I need to learn how to balance this huge, new responsibility in my life without it consuming all of who I am. Background: I’m an Adventurer at heart. I’m a traveler, a hiker, a storyteller, a diarist, a fiber artist, a gamer. I’m madly in love with my husband (Mr of Vries), and of course my new son (Rowan of Vries). I hail originally from Seattle, WA, but I followed Mr of Vries and immigrated to the UK (London) about two and a half years ago to marry him and start a new life in a new city, a new land. This has opened up whole new adventures and travel opportunities in my personal universe, and also added myriad new challenges—including having a new baby with a near non-existent support network. This has been… difficult. My son is wonderful and very loved, but the situation comes with a high emotional/physical toll. The Challenge: Note: I don’t do hardcore metrics. My way is to have spheres of priorities, and keep focus on fulfilling actions within those priorities. So what you will see are categories and example/target actions in which I aspire to. Balancing the Books of Vries: I used to have a daily spread/layout in which I kept track of my desired and needful tasks for each day, but baby blew that system apart. I want experiment with and design a new record-keeping system for my day that incorporates mum-care, baby-care, and everything else. Try different spreads/layouts Make sure to add self-care and the space to actually do it (taking care of the baby is a given) Relaxing I have not done much purposeful relaxing over the last four weeks, and it’s wearing me down. I need to be better at centering myself. Recognize when I tense up, relax my muscles Stretch! Breathe Recognize and dispel anxious or other damaging thoughts Reading and journaling Movement There was the obvious recovery from childbirth, but then learning how to be out and about with a tiny baby. I’m getting better at this. Get walking regularly, or whatever else gentle movement I can do (with and without baby) Figure out good pram routes for local and city travel (not all stations--including our local one--have step-free access) Sort out a good baby carrier so I can move around more easily when I don't need the amenities of the pram Creativity/Psychic Space I am a creative being. I need to find the space in my self again to contemplate, to write, and to Make. One could argue that I’m Making a person, and that’s true, but it can’t be everything I do. Writing (journal or novel) Reading Knitting and other fiber crafts Here we go....