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Woke up today with the calm certainty that I can make my way back to my happiest, most badass, most confident self. Whee! I have a ways to go, but I’ve been there before and dammit, I will get there again. Things that take me towards said bullshit: knowing (tracking) what and how much I eat; physical activity, especially if it’s fun like dancing or involves outdoors (love time on my bike) listening to banger tunes and playlists; connecting with fam and friends, especially positive friends (altho’ I have some downer friends who are so salty and funny that they weirdly fill my cup too); hitting the flow state at work; getting stronger and more muscular; getting more mobile; sleeping like a boss. NO WAY can I tackle all of these at once, so this challenge I’ll work on tracking and mobility [but note incidental progress towards any of the other six.] Tracking food, especially, has been a love/hate thing for me for years. I only lose weight when I do it, but I have a very well-worn pattern of starting the day out strong tracking breakfast, usually lunch, then the wheels come off with afternoon snacks and dinner. I think breakfast and lunch are easy because I have a very limited repertoire there, so I can just mash ‘add yesterday’s meal’ into MFP. I will try pre populating MFP’s recipes with my top 5 or 6 most frequent meals and snacks and see if that lowers the barrier? I’m not even on the scoreboard yet in terms of meal planning, just spinning my wheels on nutrition level 1 where most days I don’t even fully track food. After a week or so of that, I will step things up and try out pre-planning every day in advance, rather than reactively logging after I eat something. Any thoughts or advice from successful trackers is very welcome! Mobility goal: I am working through GMB Elements which is alternating parts fun and humbling. Working around an ancient knee injury that has now turned into osteoarthritis, so the squat based moves are pretty tough for me! Thinking I should record myself so I can track progress towards (hopefully) moving more smoothly and beautifully. Whew, that’s a novel, I’d best get to it!

As many of you know, I'm in the middle of a mindset shift, and my last challenges have been all about changing my perspective. This work has had great rewards, and I think there's yet more to be done, so this challenge I will focus on developing more self-awareness and self-acceptance. MINDSET SHIFT GOAL Weeks 0 and 1 These weeks will be entirely focused on the "my why" goal. I've been trying to work on this these last 2 challenges but somehow it didn't work. I'll retake some affirmations I wrote in my willpower thread, and, maybe after re-writing them or polishing them a bit, will take the effort of copying them everyday. It sounds silly but I know it works. I will copy them, by hand, and I will repeat them to myself in loud voice to help ingrain them. Weeks 2 to 4 Self-awareness. I have a meditation routine now, and I would like to go up from 10 to 15 then 20 minutes a day. To help with physical awareness, will also work with Feldenkrais exercises which work pretty well for me. Self-acceptance: inner acceptance leads to outer control of our actions. I'll focus on describing what I need, or feel I need, instead of criticizing myself; I'll examine and accept my feelings, thoughts, emotions and wishes; I'll keep my exercises for anxious thoughts and cravings. WELCOME SPRING GOAL Look at those sunny days! Swifts will come soon, and cold nights will be over: it's time to get out of the house. So, big YES to outside activities: do you want to read? Go to the park and read on a bench. Do you want to do some push-ups? Do them in the country while you're on a walk. Are you going to do an IS workout? Try it in the patio! SIDE MINI-GOALS · Willpower developing activity: 15 minutes of cleaning/decluttering everyday. · Track what I eat. Something is happening with my diet and I'd like to fix it before it is too late. Extra points if I manage to prepare a fermented vegetable each week. · I'll try to "forget" my wallet at home when going to work to avoid temptations in the evening. Points Mindset shift goal WIS 3 points (my why 1, self-awareness 1, acceptance 1) Welcome spring goal STR 2 point DEX 1 point STA 2 point Side goals CON 1 point (track eating) CHA 1 point (cleaning)

Last Challenge, MEH! Most of it was a success, except the food tracking, so this next four weeks will be all about the bass.....NO! All about tracking food and staying on target. First thing to do is work out TDEE and other things, make a plan and stick to it! I am also into the last four weeks of Madcow, which has been going great, but I have reached the point where stalls are beginning to become a reality, so nutrition needs to be spot on. When Madcow is done I plan a week off, then start Cube training. Adulting is still a LUYL. Have got Son5 off to school tomorrow, Son2, Son3 and Son4 are still looking for work and schooling need to start for Son6 and Son7. Not to mention, the last two weeks of the Challenge I have work in the next town swimming teaching. So a couple of big weeks, so let's see how we go.

Last NF Challenge of 2016 - - I am a SUPERHERO I’ve been thinking (dangerous I know!) and I have decided that I don’t need to become anyone other than myself. I will always keep Black Widow as a role model for many reasons, but there are so many other superheros that have admirable traits and are inspiring. Yet not any one of them are me so I think I will be come my own SUPERHERO! What does it mean to be a superhero? I asked my family what they thought a superhero was and this is what they came up with: From the kids - Strong, smart, agile, loyal, protective, fit, bulletproof and â€I'm Batmanâ€From the hubby - put lives at risk to save others and self sacrificing (it is important to separate these because his answer are very telling of his mindset)What I think – Smart, positive, strong & agile, problem solving, never quitting and fighting for what they believe in. I will find motivation within me. I have so many things I want to accomplish and who knows what will come up tomorrow that I might want to try. Right now that bucket list has many things on it and I don’t imaging the list will get shorter anytime soon as I am always adding to it. As of right now I am still registered for a half-marathon on Feb 21, 2016. I don’t know if this is possible as I am healing up from foot surgery on October 5th, but rehab and running will be a focus for the next few months. And then rucking – OMG I think this might be my thing!!! Also lifting heavy things and skiing and hiking and tennis and volleyball and archery and…. I think you get the picture. As always my children and hubby are the largest source of external motivation for me. I want my girls to be happy, healthy and successful so I need to be the best example that I can be for them. I will support them in most any endeavor, cheer for them, be there when they are down/struggling and in general be the best parent they need (not the parent they want.) A successful parent raises their children to be successful adults!!! As for my hubby; well look at his superhero trait suggestions above! There is not much I can do other than encourage him to take better care of himself while helping to minimize his guilt. I don’t know why taking the time to take care of him self causes such guilt, but it does… Both the kids and the hubby are considering attending Ju-Jitsu classes and I will encourage them all!!! I am starting this challenge on October 26th (week 0) and I’ll end it on December 22nd (week 7.5) because I want to do as much as I possibly can before we leave on Christmas vacation. It’s a vacation where I want to play hard and enjoy the beach as much as possible. So 8 weeks and two days it is for me!!! Goals are in alignment with superhero traits but as simple as possible to ensure success! · Superheros are strong, agile and fit: I need to get back to regular exercise! o Lifting – I will get back to the Stronglifts program but with a quicky-lifty bent. I’ll do the lifts but I won’t rest as long because who has that much time and a life!?!?!? I will take baby steps because I’m starting over with the bare bars. And for Christmas I am asking for a personal training session with some Olympic weightlifting coaches that I just found here in town!!! § Stronglifts 2-3 times per week § Daily body weight stuff in my office for 10 minutes, twice a day, 4-5 days per week: pushups, squats and abs o Walking/running – I’m starting this challenge in my walking boot so this will have to be a progressive goal. My goal is to make progress from walking initially to running and hiking at the end of this challenge. I will of course listen to my doctors and I reserve the right to make any changes here as needed. Goal is 30+ minutes 3-4 times a week § In the boot: 30 minutes on the recumbent elliptical § Walking: outdoor or on treadmill – § Running: when allowed § Hiking: when the weather allows o Yoga/stretching/physical therapy/foam rolling - This is an as needed task that will be better defined after seeing a physical therapists. That being said I want to get back into the habit of yoga § Physical therapy – as needed § Yoga – once a week o Skiing – once we get an active ski season going on (opening day is tentatively scheduled for Nov 27) skiing can replace wither a lifting or running workout (but only one or the other) · A superhero has lots of energy to fight the forces of evil: Food is very important to me. My food choices can make or break a challenge. I thought I was eating OK and I hate to log every bite that I eat. Despite this I experimented with MFP recently and it was a revelation. I need to keep track of my food as a tool to keep my macros on track. So I keep tracking on MFP will aim for: o 1500-1700 calories per day o low carbs (below 100g always, aiming for 50g per day) o at least 100g protein per day but more is better o what ever else in fat. o I reserve the right to adjust if needed o I will take Thanksgiving Day off from tracking and guilt! · A superhero is a smart problem-solving machine! Sleep is one of the most important things that I can do to help keep my mind sharp, stay productive and maintain a positive outlook on life. So this one is simple: o If I go to work the next morning bedtime is 10:30pm o If I get to sleep in tomorrow bedtime is 11:00pm · A superhero always takes care of the things that they believe in. I believe in myself and my family. So to best do all of the above to take care of myself and my family one key is to keep stress to a minimum, therefore I will do the following: o Get x-mas done early – by Thanksgiving (before if possible!) o Pack early – 90% done over the Thanksgiving weekend with a list of the last minute packing so I don’t forget something important. (I pack for me and the girls) o Take time for me – I’d like to do a girls night out with friends and take the time for a mani-pedi before my vacation o Stop reading crap – I’ll read only the good stuff and the overall amount of reading will be reduced. o Take time to spend with each member of my family 1-on-1 – This translates into the plan for at least one 2-4 hour “date†with each member of my family at least once in the next 8 weeks · BONUS Superhero action: o Superheros are good examples for others to follow (usually) and they help when they can. I will be a superhero for my hubby. He needs the support when it comes to sleep, exercise and eating healthy. o A superhero makes things therefore I will make things § Clutches (gifts for a cruise summer 2016) § Cross body bags (gifts for my girls and nieces on that cruise) § Pillows for the outside furniture o A superhero is clean?!?!? § My craft room is a mess, so I'll clean it § Decluttering and selling items will happen in a random fashion That looks like a lot but it really is the basics: exercise, food, sleep and family I need a superhero name, or do I? Maybe I’ll just traverse the challenge and my superhero name will arise…

Despite my attempts to get on track last challenge and successfully cutting soda from my diet, I'm having a lot of trouble right now. I weigh the most that I've weighed pretty much ever (only by a few pounds, but that's a few pounds too many), have been working far too much, even for me, haven't been sleeping well on the few rare nights that I've had the chance, and am generally dealing with super low self esteem. To that end, I've made a huge leap and registered for the National Harbor Ugly Sweater 5k on December 21st. I have a bunch of friends from different parts of my life coming to town to run it with me and am focusing my goals around it since it times out so well for the challenge. MAIN CHALLENGE: SUCCESSFUL COMPLETE A 5K WITHOUT WALKING I did my first 5k last June and ran about 2.5 miles of it (it was actually 3.6 miles, not 3.1), so, if I work at it, I should be able to run this one without stopping. There are two things I'm going to do to help me achieve it. Goal 1: Do a morning mile EVERY DAY. If I have time, this can obviously be expanding to a longer run to prepare for the race. However, getting outside every morning for 10 minutes will be both helpful in training to run a 5k in the cold, make sure I stay active even when I get busy, and give me a measurable thing to track and see improvement. Goal 2: Track my food and beverage intake EVERY DAY. I know what I'm supposed to be eating. I know what I can afford to eat. And I know that I drink more alcohol than I should because a drink or two a night when I'm working late is standard. Tracking what I'm putting into my body will help me keep an eye on my nutrition levels and will hopefully help me lose some excess weight, making it easier to run and improve my times. I'll be using sparkpeople to help me track both of these things and my stats. I haven't used it since spring 2012, but was having good results when I did. SIDE QUEST: BUILD SOME CONFIDENCE AND SELF ESTEEM I've been struggling a lot lately due to a lack of confidence and self esteem, particularly when it comes to my body and looks. If anyone has any ideas how to deal with this, please let me know! For now, I'm just going to try to focus on the good, focus on getting more sleep, and appreciating it when I get compliments.