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Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” While this quote is widely attributed to Winston Churchill, there's some who argue it's true source. I'm off topic, please pay no heed to my ramblings. It's easy for me to lose track sometimes... Ok, ok all the time. I've been on this site for sometime. During that time I've never followed through any of my side quests to complete my end game quest. It's not entirely uncommon for me to begin anything and sprint right into the field of battle, if you will, and for some time I will excel, push through the gruel and sweat and then I'll lose that initial momentum. This is so true to the point, I really feel that at this point...it's almost damned near inevitable that is what I will do in anything I do. This isn't where I pictured myself at thirty-two years old. I'm not trying to be pessimistic, throw a pity party or be ungrateful for my many, many blessings in my life the Gods have given me. As such, there are many things in my life that I am the one responsible for the fruits they bare. I lost track again.. I think, em, maybe not? I'm thirty-two, overweight, overcome with stress, depression (But wait, there's more!) and anxiety whilst being generally unhappy with where I am in life. I adore my beautiful fiancee, our handsome wee lad and even our aggravating but sweet Shorkie, Gypsy...it's everything else in my life I'm unhappy with and these things are and have been bleeding into those wondrous blessings that is my family. Now that I've either got your attention or lost it (The latter is irrelevant, moving on ha), my name is Drew, and my nickname is Redbeard. Besides being thirty-two and overweight, I'm a gamer, an author, an oughta-be musician and last but most certainly not least a follower of the Anglo-Saxon/Nordic Heathenry and Asatru faith. I also am rather interested in many other beliefs, pantheon's, mythos and Core Shamanism as well those exclusively not separate to their parent faiths. This is my time, I'm nearly middle aged according to the general consensus, and if I don't change these negative things I dislike about myself, I may never be able to.

For only three days, I've been so grateful to have joined Nerd Fitness. But I never fully acknowledged the reason why I chose to do so (finally). It is because of the fact that this community seems so open, especially when it comes to going from unhealthy to confident and thriving. I gave an introduction to myself here (Don't Slay This Dragon…), voiced my exercise woes (over here Fail To Plan, Planning to F…_) and am coming to terms to with my current 'diet' (Former Vegan Considering Paleo). But over here, I just want to share with you the tipping point I came to which brought me here in this section. When the article about Respawning was first written, I thought it was the best post to have ever been made on this site. For so long, I rejoiced in the creation of a community that not only likes the same 'nerdy' things as I do, but also enjoys working out and staying healthy? Inconceivable! But why did I not join? It is because I assumed my then methods of eating, exercising, heck, even THINKING, were right for me. I ignored the important aspect of health- that everything begins and ends with your mind, and whether or not you choose to become the puppet or the puppeteer to your thoughts. With the mental aspect starting to strengthen, I then challenged my habits. As a vegan, I did question my own morality, but I also questioned the actions of those who abide by the lifestyle that veganism promotes. I was insulted for even considering going back to eating meat, even though it was for my health. I was tired of mainstream bloggers/celebrities/nutritionists/doctors etc telling me I was not doing a good enough job as a vegan. I was tired of my digestion going out of whack as a result of it. I was also tired of finding micro results on an otherwise macro fitness routine. I was lifting weights for seventy minutes. I did not see any improvements from the high reps. I stopped doing cardio, sure, but as a result, I lost a lot of agility and stamina. I was tired from lifting weights constantly, that it started to affect my posture/spine; my yoga instructor, thankfully, pulled me right out of that, and helped me to fix it ASAP (I have my youth and natural flexibility to thank on that part). Already, I am starting to find subtle improvements. I am getting close to making animal proteins a regular part of my diet. I am getting better at handling my digestion, and while it still needs some help, it has improved. I am also getting in the habit of loving myself more. I came from a past of abuse from a parent who did not see the beauty in me. The rest of my family does not know how to find my beauty as well- because my bone structore is small, and in the past I was once very sick, they think that sickness may have stunted my growth (I am 20 and could pass for your 10 year old sister), even though none of my doctors have declared this. Still, it hurts everyday to see your family look at your sibling, who is younger and taller and more developed than you, and feel not so beautiful. But on the other hand, that hurt quickly turns into an even greater sense of self love. I've realized that they are just missing out on appreciating a very unique person. I call myself a 'dragon'- it is my spirit animal, the one creature I have loved and respected for as long as I can remember. When I look in the mirror, I like to think that the person looking at me is a sort human-dragon hybrid. There's my face, strong, determined, and peaceful. My words are like fire. I have the confidence and lust for life to enable me to fly. My skin is covered with the scales that are thick enough to ward off the lowly voices and opinions of those who strive to bring me down. That's why I came to Nerd Fitness. To unleash my inner Dragon, and 'fulfill my destiny' (cue classic Clash of the Titans theme). And I also want to help inspire others around me. I have a ton of levels to complete in life, and already, I have finished one of them. And that is to be a part of something bigger and greater than myself. Thank you for welcoming me into this community.