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In the not too distant future, when all weapons have been removed from the world, a virus has caused a fundamental shift in the rules of nature. What were once proud predators have been subdued and prey animals have become ravenous hunters with super-speed. In the UK, the most fearsome new hunter is the hedgehog. It is such a successful hunter that it has, in fact, killed all other predator competitors and essetially taken control of the islands. With its small stature and disarmingly cute appearance, it can easily sneak up on its unsuspecting victim and poke it with a neurotoxin quill, reducing the poor sod to a pile of twitching, gibbering mush. And then.......it feasts. It takes a hedgehog a few days to eat a standard housecat (requiring regular poking with its quills to keep its meal from running away), so imagine how long it would take for it to consume a human..........yeah, it's messy and all kinds of unpleasant. But we do have one advantage over this vicious creature: it cannot climb. Thus, the human race now live in tree-based colonies and being able to make a swift ascent is essential to survival. Not all trees are created equal, unfortunately, and some do not have low branches that are easy to reach to start the ascent. The skill of being able to climb such a tree is the ultimate test that any human must pass if they are to be allowed to go out foraging for food. The number of foragers in my colony was brought down after a coordinated attack by the hedgehogs, so I have been recruited to begin the training as I'm quite an experienced tree climber. The instructors are harsh, telling me constantly that I am fat, weak, and slow, but I suppose at the end of the day no one wants to spend 3 months being eaten by a hedgehog. I hope I'm up to the challenge. Main Quest: Escape from the killer hedgehogs by improving my tree climbing skills Goals (based on my instructor's criticism): 1) Lose 5kg/10lbs - hedgehogs are drawn by the smell of fatty goodness, so losing the pudge will give me an edge and the less weight I have to haul up the tree the better 2) Be able to lift 75% of my body weight - I can already lift 50% on the assisted pull-up machine in the training area, so I will continue working on this 2-3 times a week, ultimately working towards a full pull-up 3) Complete at least 30 minutes of yoga 3 times a week - I believe my speed in climbing will be greatly enhanced by improving my flexibility, as I'll be able to reach higher branches with both arms and legs Life Goal: I will endeavour to have at least one positive social outting with my female colleagues from work each week. I'm relatively new to my job and the area (plus getting along with women isn't really my strong suit), but I need to move out of my comfort zone and make some new friends so this is my challenge to myself. My motivation: When I have kids (still a few years in the future), I want them to be proud of their mom and think she looks like a super-hero.