Respawn Point. Again.

[AwkwardOwl]

So....I'm back at where I started about 9 months ago.  I lost ~20 pounds, then life happened and I stopped working out and started eating crap to comfort myself.  Gained back the 20 pounds and here I am.  I'm struggling with my cycle of 'lose some weight', get bored, and go back to how I used to eat.  ....I want to lose ALL of my weight but I really don't know how to keep my motivation through the long haul (already lost 60 pounds, looking to lose another 50 and get down to around 140-150).  The lowest I've been is 179.  Help or advice is appreciated!

[Wobbegong]

Welcome back, Owl! 

 

Maintaining enthusiasm over long periods can be really tough, especially if you're thinking about it in terms of "once I get there, I'll be good!" What we all really need are lifestyle changes that are sustainable, not a struggle to maintain daily. But saying that and putting it into action are two very different things. 

 

Can I ask what it is that causes you to get off track? You said "life happened," and that makes sense and I'm not asking for personal details, but is it that you get really busy dealing with a million things exploding in your face at once, or really overwhelmed and drained and don't have the energy to keep up with your goals, or distracted, or discouraged from a lack of progress, or overcome by that annoying voice in the back of our minds saying "you don't have time today... you can put it off for later, we'll get to it..." (Virtuous Future Wobbegong has suffered a lot for Lazy Present Wobbegong's lackadaisical attitude) 

 

If you can identify what it is that's derailing you, maybe you can prepare for it in advance and be ready to overcome it when it happens? 

[AwkwardOwl]

2 minutes ago, Wobbegong said:

Can I ask what it is that causes you to get off track? You said "life happened," and that makes sense and I'm not asking for personal details, but is it that you get really busy dealing with a million things exploding in your face at once, or really overwhelmed and drained and don't have the energy to keep up with your goals, or distracted, or discouraged from a lack of progress, or overcome by that annoying voice in the back of our minds saying "you don't have time today... you can put it off for later, we'll get to it..." (Virtuous Future Wobbegong has suffered a lot for Lazy Present Wobbegong's lackadaisical attitude) 

 

Thanks the welcome back and your helpful response!  One of my main downfalls is eating bad one day and allowing that to be a downward spiral.  Also, just feeling overwhelmed in general with a lack of energy/stress and letting that dictate me eating food to comfort myself.  I think eating to comfort myself is my biggest downfall.

[Wobbegong]

Gotcha. Well, my opinion of eating for comfort/stress relief is... you should do it. 

 

With a caveat! 

 

Food can satisfy more than physical hunger. If there's a food you like that serves an emotional purpose, you should go ahead and indulge in it, but the trick is to do so mindfully. When you want a treat to reassure yourself, pay really close attention to it while you eat! Focus on it! What does it smell like, what does it taste like, how does it make you feel in the moment? Don't sit there snacking on whatever it is while you're watching TV, until you've distractedly finished the whole bag and hardly remember eating it at all. 

You might be surprised at how little of the food it really takes to satisfy the craving or emotional need. Just like with food you're eating to satisfy hunger, you stop eating as soon as the need is met. You just have to pay attention so you don't miss it when that happens and keep eating accidentally.

 

As far as getting overwhelmed and general lack of energy, I often find it's caused by having too much on my plate. Not necessarily by doing too much, but by having a really long to-do list. Those items waiting for my attention weigh on my mind, giving me anxiety when I relax ("You should be more productive!") and when I try to sleep ("Wait, you forgot to do x today! And that reminds me, you were going to do y! Oh, speaking of y, that z thing you told so and so you would do... you haven't done it!") and even when I'm working on something else! ("Ok, as soon as you're done here, next is...") 

I have a number of tricks I use to overcome this, ranging from setting timers, to keeping a physical list by my bed so I can write things as they crop up when I'm trying to sleep, to organizing my to-do lists by priority and focusing on just the #1 item until it's done. I also find it helpful to keep notes of everything I've done in a day, even things that are habitual or that I would normally overlook, and give myself credit for them! But probably most important is overcoming the urge to multitask. Just take it one step at a time, and eventually you'll get there. 

 

Sorry for the long post! I hope there's at least a small nugget of something helpful for you in here, lol. Really it comes down to figuring out what works for you. Best of luck!

[zeroh13]

Welcome back!

 

I think one of the tricks is to take things slow. Build better habits around food. For example, start by cutting out soda and replacing it with water. Once that's a habit, add in another change, like eating one serving of veggies with every meal. The same goes for working out. It's easier to start off with twice and week than it is to start off with five times a week. Trying to change everything about the way we eat gets pretty exhausting. I think it also helps to think of things like soda, cake, chocolate, and comfort foods as treats that you can have occasionally, rather than "OMG I'm never going to eat/drink this again!" 

 

Another thing to look out for is your calorie deficit. You need one to lose weight, but if you cut back on food too much (or add in a ton of exercise) it'll leave you pretty lethargic. Food is fuel. So if your energy levels drop a lot when you're trying to lose weight, you might actually need to eat more. It could also be that you aren't getting enough nutrients. Or if you've been going at it a few months, your body might just need a break. Yeah, you won't lose the pounds as fast, but you'll feel much better and your body will thank you for it later. It's also easier to eat a bit less than normal than to try and eat, for example, half of what you normally would.

 

I think the hardest thing though is just saying, "yeah, today was crappy, but tomorrow is a new day." A lot of us are still trying to figure out how to bounce back after things go downhill. For me, what helped the most was just talking about it, instead of trying to keep it inside and hiding it from everyone. There's something about putting it out there that makes it easier to change.

 

I hope this helps.

[Wobbegong]

14 minutes ago, zeroh13 said:

Another thing to look out for is your calorie deficit. You need one to lose weight, but if you cut back on food too much (or add in a ton of exercise) it'll leave you pretty lethargic. Food is fuel. So if your energy levels drop a lot when you're trying to lose weight, you might actually need to eat more. It could also be that you aren't getting enough nutrients. Or if you've been going at it a few months, your body might just need a break. Yeah, you won't lose the pounds as fast, but you'll feel much better and your body will thank you for it later. It's also easier to eat a bit less than normal than to try and eat, for example, half of what you normally would.

This is a really good point that gets overlooked a lot. Often when people decide to make a diet change they decide to go straight to their target calories from wherever they're at. Don't! Decrease your calories slowly, dropping about 200/day every week or less, until you get to your goal caloric intake. Especially if you're really overweight, your first goal should be to slow and then stop the gaining process, not to immediately jump on the "lose" train. 

 

I also agree with everything else Zeroh said. Good advice!