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I need this respawn. a.k.a. ramblings of a (re)beginner!


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I've been a lurker for a long time, occasionally active in the Men's FB group. I know how amazing I feel when everything is going right - but I'm self defeating every day. Food is the big one, but I've gotten back into Xbox gaming too. I'm self employed, and work from home when I'm not on the road, so it's up to me whether my business succeeds or fails. I'm a top level procrastinator (but to be honest I've seen great improvements in this).

 

This big issue is, 40 is approaching - and I've told myself again and again I'm going to be in the best shape of my life at 40 (later this year), and I've done exactly nothing to help with this.

 

Today is day one - I need to look at my goals again, My big why was real and hugely personal, but it wasn't enough. As I read/listen to more and more about stoicism, I find it really resonates with me, and my big why has to be something about me being ok whatever happens. Not being defeated by other peoples actions, and not letting my feelings hurt others.

 

I just finished The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, and I loved it. Things are waking up again - I'm off the booze, I'm off the sugar (which has always been harder for me than not drinking). I'm wiping all my XP and I'm starting from scratch.

 

I'm going to try and get more involved in the community - I'm going to need support from people here as I find my way back. 

 

This has been a big of a jumbled post, but it's a statement of intent. I'm Back!

 

 

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Here's what I just posted over in the FB Men's group:

 

Hey all - I'm doing a full respawn - like back to zero. I've unchecked all of my quests and am sitting on zero XP. Ranger probably suits me best, but I'm willing to roll a new class if it helps.

I need to revise all my goals and my big why. I'm self employed and I'm working from home (the distractions are everywhere!), and - it's the off season so I have to do this on basically NO money. (The business is going well, but there are still growing pains and cash is tight).

I hit 40 at the end of the year and want to be in the best shape of my life, not the worst. I'm not carrying a lot of extra weight, but my joints are sore, my posture sucks and I kind of feel like I'm built like Bob from Bob's Burgers. I don't think my physical challenge is going to be that hard to overcome, but my mental game needs work.

Time to come up with a plan. I don't have a holocaust cloak or a wheel barrow - but the assets I do have include:

- NF Academy membership
- yoga mat
- 1 x 15kg Kettle Bell 
- 1 x 8kg Kettle Bell 
- A door frame pull up bar
- shoes
- unlimited podcasts, audio books and a beautiful city to walk in
- the experience of having done this before and knowing how good it feels to push through
- The internet
- the ability to cook real food
- Y'all!

I need to purge:

- Steam account
- Xbox games (although it's our household media player right now - so I need a cheap means to play youtube, netflix, plex etc through the TV, then I can ditch the Xbox completely).
- Sugar (oh you sweet tasty soul destroying bastard)
- Alcohol (easy)
- self loathing and self defeatism, basically any self destructive behaviour.

I'm keeping:

- LOTRO. If I only play one game, Imma stay in Middle-earth, it's a nice community, and I'm a huge Tolkien fan.

Help a brother out - send me some love (it really does make a difference)!

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Way to revive a dead thread, but I just logged back in and found this. less than 2 months after announcing my reboot... I left my wife!

 

You want a reboot or a hard reboot? I turned 40 2 months after that, broke my arm 6 weeks after than, and nearly 2 years since my OP, here I am!

 

I'm 41, happily living with a new partner and a kitten. Learning Spanish, making big strides in my business and I'm in a better head space than I've been in a long time. I forgive minor missteps, take action against big ones. Get up early most days and run through a solid routine. I could do better on diet and I need to do better on exercise, but hey - I'm feeling good!

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I realize this is not the direction we should be going but now I’m super curious about LOTRO...

Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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2 minutes ago, ladyofthebog said:

I realize this is not the direction we should be going but now I’m super curious about LOTRO...

 

It's over 10 years old now, but still has a strong community (depending which server you choose to play on). The graphics obviously aren't as good as a new game, but for some reason I still really enjoy it when I take the time to play. Oh, and since my OP I've bought a PS4 because some things are still worth it, and RDR2 is definitely one of those things!

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