Bouncer Appears Once More (Community Respawn)

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Hey all!

 

So the last couple of days I realized I'm tracking my goals again like good ole Nerd fitness, and able to work with my resistance this time around.

 

I'll post a longer version of my journey in my battle log. But have been losing weight since (though I can barely notice except one of my belts is too big), and won't know the number until my next doctor's appointment in a couple weeks (my home scales are just not accurate enough for me to call them anything). Along with other parts of my life had been given some needed peace (had made my bed for nearly 2 months (unheard of me in the past)... until school ruined it lol).

 

Anyways... Here's my respawn goals that I've decided to work onto the next challenge coming up (or whatever I decide after this):

 

Main challenges:

-Spiritual hour.... -Tracking my moods/skills for counseling and along with some time for some personal time on what feels right.

I'm tracking if I at least fill out my check in card for counseling, if I do anything else I had a good day. Reward: I can buy SimsCity4 the next time its on sale on Origin

 

-Fast food artificalness  begone - Pretty much my early 20-self is able to lose weight from just cutting out sugary drinks and processed foods from daily picking up ready made. However keeping my sweets to what I buy once a week or make at home is able to slim me down. So I'm following through with it. Reward: $1 a day. So I could buy something special every few days or once a week. Or if I wish to make this bigger, I can look into bigger rewards (thinking of maybe having my goal be a pedicure, but I will have to see).

 

-Using my bullet journal.... - It's amazing how I avoid writing stuff down when I avoid life. But I found making charts in this thing is pretty easy along with my to do list and daily lists, now to add in my planner. Reward:? Trying to figure this out

 

-Study.... This is a $.5 per an hour of study. I have a starting list of games I want to buy (of course soon as school as started). But an incentive to open my books while my tired brain says no.

 

Fitness wise: I'm not adding any right now. I've been outside more, and walking more with just school now. Adding anything outside of fun/and getting my mood up by being outside. I don't think I can handle. Though noting for myself here, I'm hoping to get stronger somehow. Since my outdoor buddy (brother) has been bringing up stuff I know I won't be able to enjoy right now...

 

Well off to class, will be on later.

[Loveable_Bouncer]

I'm still here. This weekend didn't go so well with all my goals. But I had hit them up till I faced the somersault of riding the Labor Day Weekend energy (mixed with the upcoming full moon I was just happy to show up for my jobs).

 

Changing studying for $1 per an hour, my endurance of working on homework is horrible... (Imagine having to huff and puff by barely getting up the second stairwell... I wish there was more tips for how to deal with slow processing and adhd along with getting amount of endurance for school work up).

Also adding a dollar for when I show up to work on time and am productive 90% of the time. Just so I keep my job.

 

My spiritual hour could be better, but it has been worse in the past.

 

Eating wise, pretty much sworn off vending machines even though I'm eyeing one right now... (Have to remind myself my cravings for pop mostly come from dehydration). While I picked up some stuff at the store this morning instead of figuring out food at home (just another sign of not having a habit down for food setting up over the weekend).

[zeroh13]

Welcome back!!!

[Loveable_Bouncer]

23 hours ago, zeroh13 said:

Welcome back!!!

Thank you!

(And as you've seen my bread crumb trail I'm catching up on your thread during my homework breaks).

 

 

 

And a quick update: Depression has been brutal, its been getting darker faster than usual (probably because I don't have sugar as an easy escape , along with facing my avoidance). Through my DBT therapy I was given some assistance on how a good game plan if I can't seem to get out of the dark hole (definitely going to be looking into a med change if this doesn't lighten up after a few days).

But able to still chug along with school, even though my apartment is a disaster and as made cooking difficult... Instead of over gorging though, I've been actually trying to think of ways to bring some of my fast food at home (or finding ingredients I like).

 

 

During a needed walk also today I realized I have some long term goals (because when facing dark depression you need to remember your future goals to keep you going).

-In 3 months I want to have walked/played a full game of Frisbee golf at my favorite River park.

-In 6 months-9 months I want have gone on a 6+ hour trail outing (hike for a day).

-In a year I want have done an overnight camp out (preferably with a trail and in nature, but keeping it open to where the universe take me).

-In 5 years I want to have started or walked a trail trip that will take me months to walk (you know one of those Continental trails that span different biomes and have movies based off books written... Ever since I read an article when I was little about the Appalachian Trail I had wanted to do one.)

 

I realized on my walk when I got a bit grounded and started thinking of how to up my goals, a biggie is to make goals once more. Just over a year ago I was able to walk a Warrior Dash, I never thought I would attempt one of those. I'm finding I would love to be able to know how to go on adventures and move my body through them. And seriously with my Rec and Park major all these goals should be attainable. Will add them to my Battle log thread later to make a goal post (or add to my signature).

 

 

Also during my prepare for the worst with my counseling, it pretty much reminded me my lack of social life. I just don't have any friends I can call up no matter what time of day or at least be able to call up and talk about whatever is on my mind (like dark depression). Luckily I have this site and my sims site for distraction but pretty much a push since my testing said to try out different things that have enough fear but safe landing. So I figure this is good to add in a monthly goal for social situations....

 

This month I'm going to go to the Pow Wow that will happen on the 22-24th. I've been avoiding some things with the Dakota 38 in Mankato, MN even though there is more love brought into different events (they had a drumming event last week where the hanging happened last week, but I wasn't able to go also because of scheduling issues). But I've always wanted to go to the Pow Wow, I happen to have the same weekend off and have some background on how to have good manners from last semester (and a high chance I might bump into people I may know since its local). Crowds freak me out which is a reasoning why I avoided them in the past, but this will be outdoors and I know the exact location. So some culture and working on being open during a crowd - a good enough challenge I would say. 

[zeroh13]

3 hours ago, Bouncer the Resilient said:

Thank you!

(And as you've seen my bread crumb trail I'm catching up on your thread during my homework breaks).

 

3 hours ago, Bouncer the Resilient said:

-In 6 months-9 months I want have gone on a 6+ hour trail outing (hike for a day).

Ooo, I like this goal. I think the longest I've hiked is maybe two or three hours. Or about how long it takes for my phone to start dying. I should add this to my list of goals for when I have a real camera (and won't be draining my phone battery by taking pictures).

 

3 hours ago, Bouncer the Resilient said:

I'm finding I would love to be able to know how to go on adventures and move my body through them.

Adventures! All of my fitness goals are based on making it easier to go on various adventures.

 

3 hours ago, Bouncer the Resilient said:

Also during my prepare for the worst with my counseling, it pretty much reminded me my lack of social life. I just don't have any friends I can call up no matter what time of day or at least be able to call up and talk about whatever is on my mind (like dark depression). Luckily I have this site and my sims site for distraction but pretty much a push since my testing said to try out different things that have enough fear but safe landing. So I figure this is good to add in a monthly goal for social situations....

We just went over my therapy goals in my session today. The biggest one is basically to be able to have a social life. Right now, this site is the only place I'm really social. Aside from work. But I don't have much in common with the people I work with. And most of them annoy me... 

 

My therapist has told me a similar thing, find things that push your comfort zone, but don't overwhelm you. That's one of the reasons I decided to start volunteering at one of the local parks.

 

I hope you can make it out to the Pow Wow and have fun!

[Loveable_Bouncer]

3 minutes ago, zeroh13 said:

Ooo, I like this goal. I think the longest I've hiked is maybe two or three hours. Or about how long it takes for my phone to start dying. I should add this to my list of goals for when I have a real camera (and won't be draining my phone battery by taking pictures).

Yeah same here, though my reason is usually I need to move on or am getting tired. I think the longest was 5 hours actually before I joined NF... So many miles that I made a day trip to check out a state trail I had biked growing up.

Or maybe a portable charger? You reminded me I need to get out my regular camera and start test running it, so I can have my practice in by the time I do hit the big trails.

 

My personal biggest question I need to answer is bathroom breaks around certain trails when several miles a way from a port-a-potty... I learned a bit back when I was in girl scouts when I was younger, but water trails for kayaking have more convenience for women over dirt paths... lol. I'll figure it out.

 

9 minutes ago, zeroh13 said:

My therapist has told me a similar thing, find things that push your comfort zone, but don't overwhelm you. That's one of the reasons I decided to start volunteering at one of the local parks.

 

Jealous of that volunteering... But very much understand how that helped, I was lucky enough to find my present museum job as starting off as volunteering to help get me out socially and the needed confidence boost for my job searching back then (luckily now that job and my contacts are pretty much my safe zones to help me learn even through the tough ties.

 

13 minutes ago, zeroh13 said:

I hope you can make it out to the Pow Wow and have fun!

And thank you!

 

 

 

 

Also wanted to note, for social stuff and me learning to juggle. I'm sticking with the Rec and Park club since their the easiest to keep track of and greatest to ask for help/part of my major (also helps to get to know the different professors before I take their classes in the next semesters).
Next month I'm actually going to be going to a conference with the club up North (colder prairies...), so I'm excited for that extra break during October along with maybe getting more contacts and ideas on what I should be looking into. While also remembering in the past even at my worst conferences were my strength for contacts and having people enjoying to talk with me.

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Okay so I may have fallen off the wagon just as quickly getting on. Studying has been good with the immediate award, and a new realization of how long it takes me to get through any school work (on my good and bad days). With the mix of ADHD and slow processing, while learning the skills I'm avoiding... All new ways to be exhausted. 

Convenient food and daily diaries are a difficult huge piece...

 

 

But found out this last week eating out with convenient and sugary options,  I think it ended up making my insomnia unbearable this last week. Which I got a new view why getting out of the horrible circle of fast food is damn difficult, I feel shitty can't think straight on normal things learning to organize my food for the week sucks. Today I ended up vowing it to be my last day and sticking to the basic goals. To help me save money and the calories in sugar, along with saving time with depression (or at least helping me get enough sleep every night even if my depression gets bad for no reason). 

 

Wednesday night I ended up having a full melt down when I tried to sleep. Kind of the end result of my realizations about school. The social goals are in line with my goals, enough to get me out of my bubble a little more while able to allow my self to curl up into a ball at other times. 

I guess to me it was an end realization of what I want out of friendships in the future,  a needed knowing of one day I look around when I head toward my level 50 what I want to see around me with friends.

I ended up seeing good end results at class the next day in Rec and Park for group work, ended up finding the weekly small group discussion to be more than fun... I was dead tired but still able to take the leadership role, while also attempting to work on my small group skills on getting ideas onto paper. While personally, curious with the main topics discussed by my own experiences with observing the real world (otherwordsI was able to find the thrill of taking a basic class so I could not only keep up when dead tired but still keep on learning).

 

 

Anyways, sugar wise I have a new physical clothing goal. I found a pair of non-plus size women's jeans that are skinny/regular  ( I usually stick to boot cut for my own personal taste). They are a pretty purple color with bleach spots all over them, and to me look well made. Found them at my Goodwill job on Friday during Employee Appreciation sale, are a pair of jeans still with all the tags on (close to $50 pair of jeans that I got for $8). My goal is to post pics on how they fit me every month, I believe I will be able to fit in them even if I gain a bit of muscle with weight loss (or I'm going to learn how to tailor). I have them hanging over my bedroom door as a reminder as I accidentally went into overeat mode today.....  Their the first piece of clothing I have fallen in love with and want to fit into, but need to remember slow steps so I don't go crazy.







Okay.

Back to it! DBT diary needs a new daily reward/plan of action toward my goal. Along with a goal to keep up my motivation to not eat out. I'm going to use this week to maybe look into ways of how to approach those two things differently. Because with school, I'm at a good point. Bullet journal could be better but that will fall in line when I have a better balance of my other new habits.

I also realized this song:

Pretty much my jam two years ago (was my NaNoWriMo 2015 pantsing prompt), really is insync with how I'm learning about life. Learning how to create my own balance while also still healing a bit, and trying new things which I can do. Thinking of maybe making the next challenge off this song theme, or using songs to help tell a story.

 

For challenges in the past, I tried to use leveling, I'm just staying away from that. I know when I level up, I can almost hear the "you did it" soundtrack when I realized I leveled up quite a bit on a few skills. I mainly need to keep using NF as a way to help make tracking my duckling steps a little bit more fun!

[zeroh13]

9 hours ago, Bouncer the Resilient said:

Okay so I may have fallen off the wagon just as quickly getting on. Studying has been good with the immediate award, and a new realization of how long it takes me to get through any school work (on my good and bad days). With the mix of ADHD and slow processing, while learning the skills I'm avoiding... All new ways to be exhausted. 

Convenient food and daily diaries are a difficult huge piece...

I know how that feels. It would take me hours to go through a chapter. And always more hours than I thought... I practically lived at the public library. And there was a convenience store right across the street that almost always had energy drinks on sale, but only if you bought them in 2s or sometimes 3s.

 

Quote

Wednesday night I ended up having a full melt down when I tried to sleep. Kind of the end result of my realizations about school. The social goals are in line with my goals, enough to get me out of my bubble a little more while able to allow my self to curl up into a ball at other times. 

I guess to me it was an end realization of what I want out of friendships in the future,  a needed knowing of one day I look around when I head toward my level 50 what I want to see around me with friends.

 

Quote

Anyways, sugar wise I have a new physical clothing goal. I found a pair of non-plus size women's jeans that are skinny/regular  ( I usually stick to boot cut for my own personal taste). They are a pretty purple color with bleach spots all over them, and to me look well made. Found them at my Goodwill job on Friday during Employee Appreciation sale, are a pair of jeans still with all the tags on (close to $50 pair of jeans that I got for $8). My goal is to post pics on how they fit me every month, I believe I will be able to fit in them even if I gain a bit of muscle with weight loss (or I'm going to learn how to tailor). I have them hanging over my bedroom door as a reminder as I accidentally went into overeat mode today.....  Their the first piece of clothing I have fallen in love with and want to fit into, but need to remember slow steps so I don't go crazy.

Awesome pants!

 

Quote

For challenges in the past, I tried to use leveling, I'm just staying away from that. I know when I level up, I can almost hear the "you did it" soundtrack when I realized I leveled up quite a bit on a few skills. I mainly need to keep using NF as a way to help make tracking my duckling steps a little bit more fun!

Duckling steps! <3

[Xena]

Loved reading about the purple jeans! Keep them as inspiration, but don't beat yourself up about where you are right now.

 

I really like your idea of paying yourself for progress on goals. I do the same thing, and it works really well for me.

 

I have one suggestion for you with studying. Have you tried the Pomodoro method? I do my own version of it (I don't have the actual timer, I just use my digital watch or phone). It really makes the time fly by for me. I often feel dread at starting complicated/difficult projects, but convincing myself just to work on it for 25 minutes is a lot easier.

[Loveable_Bouncer]

10 hours ago, zeroh13 said:

I know how that feels. It would take me hours to go through a chapter. And always more hours than I thought... I practically lived at the public library. And there was a convenience store right across the street that almost always had energy drinks on sale, but only if you bought them in 2s or sometimes 3s.

It's always really nice when I meet someone that understands the true difficulties of studying (helping me learn accept it myself). That's mainly why I decided to do only half time this time around when I returned to school last semester, I personally cannot live at the library without me rebelling the whole system.

 

And those energy drinks... Gosh I actually bought my mom four this morning (while I bought honey crisp apples instead of a sugary drink). I'm so glad I figured out the med for my stimulant last May, because I was getting really sick from that week of catch up and energy drinks at the end of last semester.

Realized this semester is not having to worry about caffeine anymore with my meds, but all the sugary treats look ten times better during a long study session..... (snack food for all my meals I'm finding when I have to do a few hour camp out).

11 hours ago, zeroh13 said:

Duckling steps! <3

Pretty much my realization of how to change my world view, especially when I realized how I viewed the saying "mole hills" as "big ass mutant mole hills".... Ducklings are just adorable.... (I probably should keep an eye out for cute stickers for my bullet journal).

 

11 hours ago, zeroh13 said:

Awesome pants!

11 hours ago, Xena said:

Loved reading about the purple jeans! Keep them as inspiration, but don't beat yourself up about where you are right now.

I find it plainly amusing that I fell in love with them and can't help literally gush when I talk about them....

Thank you Xena on the reminder, they are the needed inspiration... but also to keep me a little relaxed on my goals.

 

11 hours ago, Xena said:

I really like your idea of paying yourself for progress on goals. I do the same thing, and it works really well for me.

I'm finding it's the only way at this point. And I have the money, I'm personally hoping to seperate things well enough for "needs" and "wants" and balance my budget well enough I can continue this.

 

11 hours ago, Xena said:

I have one suggestion for you with studying. Have you tried the Pomodoro method? I do my own version of it (I don't have the actual timer, I just use my digital watch or phone). It really makes the time fly by for me. I often feel dread at starting complicated/difficult projects, but convincing myself just to work on it for 25 minutes is a lot easier.

Pomodoro is actually my main way of surviving, however it got to a point this semester of doing 5/5 (five minutes of work, 5 minutes of nonsense). It doubles the need to sit there, but I figured out I would be sitting there just as long fighting with myself. While able to cut down my goals into literal swallow-able sizes (duckling steps a tad smaller to baby steps in my opinion). Has been extremely helpful so far, especially how I found my anxiety and depression can sneak up on me with ninja moves that are easier to notice and deal with the smaller amounts of work.

It probably gives me a chance to catch my breathing also which naturally can help with anxiety (or more laughter since I usually do something fun or read up on here at the forum). Just had this realization, since I just started to keep up with it after seeing I could get 2 hours of actual work done and able to still do some work the next day. While also helping me get a chance to see which skills when I cut them down need to be worked on...

[Loveable_Bouncer]

So I've realized I'm having a personal need to push and shove (or bang myself against something at work... for how many bruises are starting to appear). It maybe a sign I'm getting stronger and my daily life isn't pushing me enough anymore.

Personally was looking at rock climbing at school, but realized they would need medical papers... (I'm avoiding updating all that till December).

But then I started to look into parkour once more. Which got me back to looking at the basics.

Going to the gym makes me cringe right now (at least until getting some gear that makes jumping jacks a bit easier...).

But then remembered Tabata! A literal no excuse workout, and will be more than enough to push me at this time. So looking to add that into my goals coming up.

 

Mini goal: Due tomorrow night. Make a page for my DBT diary cards in my bullet journal (its easier to stuff my journal compared to the binder my DBT stuff is in). Along with making charts for this week on my goals... Getting it down, and sharing the pages on hear by tomorrow night at 8 pm. CST (I'll give myself a $1 bonus for following through... If I don't get it, hmm some imagination would be needed.)

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Okay another back to bac, but it's worth it.

Realized with keeping food from home, lot's of little steps to manage that I don't like doing unless it becomes part of my habit.... I need to break down meal planning and setting up my DBT weekly tracker/Goal tracker. Actually make that a weekly goal, (or whatever amount of time I set it up for). 

 

Mini Goal-2: Due Thursday at 8 pm (phone with proof), have a list written down of all the parts of keeping of food from home in my bullet journal. (I found out in the past just writing the list for the small goals is enough to make it naturally part of what I do). Will come back to what else I need to work on after I get this turned in. 

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Whelp start off I thought to share my breakfast this morning that I was able to prep last night! (Egg bacon cup (the one egg thing I discovered I liked last month) with blueberries). I was able to make a large amount of chocolate chip pancakes and their in the freezer... So good actually (though I may have put too much chocolate in them.). Had one before I got ready to help get me out of bed... 

 

 

Now on to say I did my mini goal of my journal: 

Spoiler

 

(my challenge tracker, and reward tracker... have a few things I bought impulsively last week so trying to get caught up). 

 

(My DBT tracker, can see why I've been avoiding it. So much information to put on, but I found it less stressful when filling out. So maybe will be worth the work....

 

 

Whelp today I had realized was full to the brim with activities. Not only a day with work and classes, but also an appointment and a club meeting thrown in. Was glad I figured it out last night, else it would be a tad stressful... Been able to eat food from home for two days so far! Helped that at my club meeting they had pizza.... (was so needed since I was burnt out otherwise). 

 

Found out there is a group of people wanting to get an Adventures resource going at school (like outdoor skills, certificates and stuff). Something I've been wanting, and intrigued they want to skip the club part and make it an actual resource (like the rock climbing gym...). I guess to me I'm excited by the idea since it felt like the universe said "here you go" after a couple days of thinking of Thru-hiking and trying to figure out how to approach it. 

 

 

Mental health wise: My appointment was with my main therapist and she gave me some ideas why I'm having more difficulty... I literally have years of training of avoidance or needing a plan of escape in high stress situations. So mainly my depression is "the old way" and over time it will get better... Just the lovely challenges I'm hitting is something me wanting to go back to the old ways. Pretty much gave me the outlook that one day at a time, and what I'm worried about might get better if I work through. 

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Hmm, not pictures today. 

But this whole crying in the middle of the night with a moon phase is getting a bit tiring (though pretty much allowing it is a new biggie for me). Like I said yesterday getting through these rough times opens for fun times in the future. 

 

Last night I was proud of myself still working on homework for 30 mins even after a full day (usually I would just skip it). 

 

Food goal wise I did well until noon today. Where I was in a situation where Noodles and Company was involved, and I rarely get anything from there and I knew I needed something Asian fun to help me get through my afternoon... Korean Beef with noodles, no regrets except the soda I bought (didn't realize I could have asked for a glass for water.... Or I probably should of had milk to help with spiciness.. since I'm a baby when its spicy). 

And then this afternoon my mom offered me a  cold drink at Caribou Coffee to help cool is down, I got a brownie cooler (no caffeine, and something I will never buy myself again because it was awkward. But was nice for the moment). This technically wasn't against the rules, and I did avoid caffeine both occasions due to my mood being off and caffeine isn't helpful. 

 

 

I've added two goals- 20 mins of cleaning my apartment daily and 444 words written on 4thewords.

My apartment is a mess that needs some help, and I felt so much better after some picking up. However restricted on time so I don't clean instead of doing homework (a problem I've run into the past, cleaning is so much fun when school work is involved). 

4thewords is having an event to celebrate Costa Rica Independence Day (Sept. 15th I believe). My inner gamer is wanting to join in the fun, my inner culture nerd is excited to see some idea how they will celebrate on the site, and my creative itch has been needing this. So practice now before the event starts up this weekend!

 

 

My mother noted to me whenever I talk about school I'm giggling too much around her that at times she can't understand me.... With my dark moods on my own I hadn't noticed. She said it was defiantly a sign I was going into the right direction as she described it that I was always lit up. 

So have my name in for the committee for the Adventure group.

Today called out my professor when he was discussing something on the side of a large park project that may happen for independent study next semester (a piece of land was offered or given to the school to be turned into a Park) . Part of me is like "don't you dare, you don't have the skills for that" while the other part of me is like... "but I'm drooling over that idea.... one doesn't just drool over the idea to help make a park!!". So will wait and see... But had a personal realization with my classes I'm having to hold myself together when the full class (about 50 or 150 in my other class), but soon as people leave I switch to being open and bubbly (so of course small group work is easier for me). 

 

I could go on forever, but I know I need to get back on to study... I won't get anywhere by being hyped. 

 

 

Another mini goal! By Friday night (8 Pm) I want to have emailed the Director of my Anthropology major to help match some of my courses I transferred so I know where I am Anthropology wise. That way I can apply to Rec and Park for a major change and be able to know right away to finish my degree with a minor. (Not even looking at the other things I'm eyeing right now). 

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Update! Thursday night goal this morning of breaking down working with my cooler. I posted in my base, on a personal discovery with how to deal with the scary food and budget plan.

Pretty much first step is to figure out to buy my stables on my budget! Along with setting a day every so often to cook a warm meal and freeze (so I can eat it when I want to).

 

But figured out other things I need to get ahead, so I can enjoy the short cuts. Such as my DBT page. Yes, it takes forever to get written down but found it to be super easy to fill out daily. Found the trick is to have my challenge page on the same page (so I'm looking at them both if I'm using my journal at all to track my money rewards....)

 

Today was a bad day for food.... I forgot to get things ready the night before... (Noticing other things I need to get setup to help make days easier). Actually had an event at my apartment's last night that was very sad and had made the night interesting when I got home. So I had a bad day today and realized actually when reading the email Steve had sent out that I need to work on my backup plans when I'm not doing well. Because I ate out today and didn't like 90% of it (but was reminded I need to buy drinks every so often to help keep myself hydrated because some days water doesn't cut it for me).

 

For school work, I've been able to work on breaking down a paper and project that I've been able to work on daily, while also working on IT. (Otherwords more processing time, same amount of hours worked on the paper as if I was doing it last minute). To the point, my next step is to work with a writing tutor to practice using that resource. I'm getting the hang of IT homework, however knowing I need to add at least some study time for the IT test... While also noticing I need to put a little more effort into "skimming" for my Rec and Park class because I need to get the information earlier to be able to process it a bit better to be more confident in giving answers on weekly quizzes.

 

Pretty much getting an idea how to level up. While also seeing how projects I want to do will come at unexpected times (projects that I've wanted to be a part of for months if not years). I'm seeing now on the daily skills I want to work on to make it easier even if my depression is trying to keep me down but I still show to work and have things picked up so I can throw myself into bed safely when I get home.

I guess a part of me is finally accepting its going to take a while for my depression to be "cured", I've been dealing with it for half my life. And other stuff for the majority of my life, and my realization after finishing the Hunger Games series. It's never going to go away, but the skills will change as I will change. 

[Loveable_Bouncer]

Okie Dokie, Goal tonight make up my new challenge.

The goal for next challenge. Update first post based on my changes.

I am basing a theme off of Crystals song even though I have no idea what it might be. But I have an idea where I want to go for my goals. 

[Loveable_Bouncer]

New Challenge Up right before my own strick of midnight....

 

Side goal note: didn't email the director that I needed to, will be asking for help on this next week. So added to new challenges.

[Loveable_Bouncer]

I'm calling this respawn a success.

I'm wanting to change how I approached it, however, I got a better idea how to use NF. A reminder why I love this site, so much positivity and work on goals.

Very happy I decided to leave the leveling system and look at it differently, next to some personal goals that have grown over the last couple weeks. Along wtih personal realizations.

[Xena]

Are you going to keep with this thread? You've been putting in lots of hard work and making impressive progress.

 

I'm embarrassed to admit that I don't know any songs from Of Monsters and Men except Little Talks....the reason that embarrasses me is that it's one of my FAVORITE songs! I'm definitely going to listen to crystals, but I want to save it for when I can really enjoy it. Thanks for posting it!

 

 

[Loveable_Bouncer]

17 minutes ago, Xena said:

Are you going to keep with this thread? You've been putting in lots of hard work and making impressive progress.

 

I'm embarrassed to admit that I don't know any songs from Of Monsters and Men except Little Talks....the reason that embarrasses me is that it's one of my FAVORITE songs! I'm definitely going to listen to crystals, but I want to save it for when I can really enjoy it. Thanks for posting it!

 

Here's my current challenge thread (accidentally added the badass one to the last challenge, silly me).:

 

Joining the Druids due to my goals. Still working hard! (to the point of breaking on Tuesday, but still at it)

 

Hehe, Little Talks I will always have to sing along with... I think I got hooked with them on 2015 with a mix of an escape of a really hard time, and they had other songs that were famous enough to be on my local radio when I was driving quite a bit in 2013. Lionheart is one of my other favorites of them, but I think I was more surprised when I had found it to be my theme song right now. And personally, if I figure out how to make a similar costume in the video I would especially for the main singer (I don't know them well enough to call them by each of their names, but enough to have heard an album or two).