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Snarkyfishguts Has some Sock! Pow! Bang!


Snarkyfishguts

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Challenge start day!!!!!

 

It's early to be reporting in,  but here I aaaaaam!!

 

Miles walked: 0.5

Servings of freggies consumed: 3

 

It's a slow start in the Batcave this week.  A brief departure from lego Batman and Robin 

 

giphy.gif

Batman punches a Shark

 

If you know me, then you know my cycles are not regular and often are accompanied by migraines. This month is a lot more normal, which makes me super happy,  but also super uncomfortable and moody. It's a slow start, but it's a start. 

 

Today's fun activity was knitting. I'd like a pretty blanket for my workspace in the basement so I'm not too cold this winter. I am tackling a new stitch and the book had an error in it!! I think I figured it out, and I'm going to continue tonight and see if I was right! If not, I found an old knit-a-long and the stitches are very simple. I may do that anyway,  but I want victory over the flawed pattern first. 

 

Wednesday I'll start feeling better, so I'm gonna do my best mile-wise and stay on top of freggies and fun :) after that, I can get back on track and still win my challenge :) 

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On 9/18/2017 at 9:27 AM, Equinoxe said:

it sounds like a good start, though! How you behave and push forward towards your goals when you're not feeling your best says a lot about your dedication.

 

Also, knitting a blanket sounds like a big project! Unless... it's a small blanket?

Thanks! It's going to be lap sized, so yeah, bigger but not huge! I'm going to knit sample squares and stitch them together so it won't be knitting the same pattern over and over and over :) it may take a while. But I'm looking forward to it.

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Yesterday I ate 3.5 freggies and walked 2.1 miles.  I read a book to relax. I feel pretty good about the quests and think I'll be able to complete them.

 

my family is being difficult. I don't really want to go into details, but right now I'm frustrated. It will pass. It usually does.  I need to make some adjustments in my life so they aren't always front and center. And I will, and in a few months or weeks we'll be here again :) 

 

 so here we go! Today is a new day full of opportunities. Have a wonderful day! :) 

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Update:

 

total miles: 4

total freggies: 12

fun activities: knitting, reading, cross stitch

 

The weather has been really hot here, something I didn't anticipate. I expected cool, rainy, but not hot and humid. It's supposed to break next Wednesday, and I'll be able to walk longer distances. I can feel myself wanting to avoid vegetables and fruit again. But tonight, we're having a pasta with a veggie-laden meat sauce, and a salad. I'll have 3 servings of veggies just with dinner, and I'll eat some fruit and a veggie with lunch. 

 

The novelty of the the challenge has worn off. That was FAST, right? So now it's definitely a challenge. It's good though. Already I'm seeing positive changes. I'm naturally eating less since freggies aren't processed to be very addictive, like say...donuts. And even though I'm behind on walking, even just getting in a little bit helps me get moving, so I'm not as sedentary throughout the day. And last night, I slept more than I didn't. 

 

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I love sleep!

 

 

The most surprising part of this start has been how much better I feel inside and out. It's like cleaning a really messy room that's been neglected for months. This week was the equivalent of opening up the windows to let fresh air and sunshine in. There's still a lot of work to be done, but it's already brighter and smells better. We're not even done with the first week! So it's not fun and new anymore, but a rewarding challenge nonetheless. 

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I'm glad you are reaping the benefits of your new challenge already!

 

And send some of that heat here, will you? It's getting colder here *brrrr*

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Doodlie for life, Pancake by choice
Spoiler

 

Challenge 12, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 

Challenges 2017: 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28

Challenges 2018: 29, 30, 31, 32, 3334, 35,

Challenges 2019: 36, 37, 38, 39, 40

 

Challenges 2020: 41, 42, 43, 44, 45

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Veggies... 

 

Doughnuts are addictive, and worse, they are often social.  Glad you are rocking out the fresh veggies. 

 

Please send all the cold weather my way.  Between myself and the dog, cold is good.  Watching the fluffy death machine (aka Benny) roll in the snow at 15 degrees and then proceed to frolic, and I do mean frolic, let me know how much the heat inhibits him.  Part of my challenge is embracing cold, really looking forward to it. 

 

Sleep is amazing... 

 

 - Murphy's Roommate

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On 9/22/2017 at 2:23 AM, Murphy's Roommate said:

Veggies... 

 

Doughnuts are addictive, and worse, they are often social.  Glad you are rocking out the fresh veggies. 

 

Please send all the cold weather my way.  Between myself and the dog, cold is good.  Watching the fluffy death machine (aka Benny) roll in the snow at 15 degrees and then proceed to frolic, and I do mean frolic, let me know how much the heat inhibits him.  Part of my challenge is embracing cold, really looking forward to it. 

 

Sleep is amazing... 

 

 - Murphy's Roommate

I only have humid and hot weather to offer you. Terah might trade you some weather though :-D

 

 

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Freggies : 22

miles walked: 6

Fun activities thus far: knitting, reading, cross stitch, baking, shopping.

 

over the last couple of days, I increased my Freggies. Today I am eating mostly vegetables. It's becoming my new "easy" food. The depression has let up a bit today. I still have moments, but I feel like I can breathe. I think the veggies help.

 

Mom has has stopped doing the challenge with me. She said she feels like she just wants to live healthy, and the tracking is too much. That's alright. This challenge is really for me, and not her. we can support each other without doing the same thing. 

 

The walking part of this challenge is starting to sit heavy on me.  I need to walk a little over 3 miles a day to beat this, and that feels intimidating. But I keep telling myself the real purpose is to move, get sweaty, and develop a habit. So even walking a little every day is a step in the right direction. Even if I only qualify for dental floss, this challenge will be a success just by practicing each day.

EpzGD_s-200x150.gif

 

 

Blarg. 

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Today,  I accept that there are some things in life I cannot fix. This does not mean that everything I do is futile.  I can't make things better, and maybe working out and eating better won't help the situation,  but sitting on my ass all day eating little Debbie cakes a great way to make a shitty situation even worse. 

 

Tomorrow begins a new chapter in this challenge. :)

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12 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

Today,  I accept that there are some things in life I cannot fix. This does not mean that everything I do is futile.  I can't make things better, and maybe working out and eating better won't help the situation,  but sitting on my ass all day eating little Debbie cakes a great way to make a shitty situation even worse. 

 

Tomorrow begins a new chapter in this challenge. :)

Very true. You can't control what comes your way, but you can decide how you react to it <3 

  • Like 2
Doodlie for life, Pancake by choice
Spoiler

 

Challenge 12, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 

Challenges 2017: 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28

Challenges 2018: 29, 30, 31, 32, 3334, 35,

Challenges 2019: 36, 37, 38, 39, 40

 

Challenges 2020: 41, 42, 43, 44, 45

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On 9/23/2017 at 3:23 PM, Snarkyfishguts said:

 

 

The walking part of this challenge is starting to sit heavy on me.  I need to walk a little over 3 miles a day to beat this, and that feels intimidating. But I keep telling myself the real purpose is to move, get sweaty, and develop a habit. So even walking a little every day is a step in the right direction. Even if I only qualify for dental floss, this challenge will be a success just by practicing each day.

EpzGD_s-200x150.gif

 

 

Blarg. 

Image result for inside out sadness gif

 

 

If your workout seems intimidating then you'll end up doing less.  Just focus on getting out there.  You got this. 

  • Like 2

Race: Amazonian Ogre Princess | Class: Ranger | Profession: SuperHero

Level: 19 Ranger | STR 36 | DEX 29 | STA  35 | CON  43 | WIS 35 | CHA 23|

 

Spoiler

 

Epic Quest Avatar Lifting profile | D&D Character Sheet

Accountibillibuddies: Doodlies setting the world alight

Roadmaps: 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021

 

I am not saying I am Wonder Woman. I am just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman together in the same room.

 

Current Challenge: Shello Finally Fitnesses (sort of) and does some other things

Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 789, 10, 11, 12 , 131415, 1617181920, 21, 2223242526272829303132, 33, 3435, 36??

Starting weight = 290.4; Current weight = 269; Total pounds lost: 21.4

 

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Today I ordered postcards and business cards for work. This time, I also ordered envelopes. I'm going to put my business cards in with the postcards so art directors will have 3 images to love my work. No pressure to art directors.

 

It feels good to be working again. Tomorrow I'm going to start updating my mailing list, which is sadly two years old and completely useless. 

 

This is what I'm making for dinner tonight

 

My head hurts and I'm in a rotten mood today. But I worked out, ate well, and did all the little things that keep us civilized like making the bed and washing all my underwear and stuff like that. I'm going to go swear at the air for a bit and then I'll see y'all later :)

 

 

 

 

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18 minutes ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

My head hurts and I'm in a rotten mood today. But I worked out, ate well, and did all the little things that keep us civilized like making the bed and washing all my underwear and stuff like that.

 

The smallest and hardest wins deserve the most attention.  Well done!

 

19 minutes ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

I'm going to go swear at the air for a bit and then I'll see y'all later :)

 

Rule 4:  Be sure of your target and know what lies beyond. ;)

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He has showed you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of

you but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?

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I'm taking a day or two away from the challenge  and life to take care of some chores and other responsibilities. I'm going to put on some music and clean the house, maybe weed the garden. We have enough food in the house for meals, somI don't have to cook, and I can afford the time away from work, so.... :):) 

 

I'm really looking forward to this :D 

 

 

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On 9/25/2017 at 3:33 PM, Snarkyfishguts said:

Today I ordered postcards and business cards for work. This time, I also ordered envelopes. I'm going to put my business cards in with the postcards so art directors will have 3 images to love my work. No pressure to art directors.

 

It feels good to be working again. Tomorrow I'm going to start updating my mailing list, which is sadly two years old and completely useless. 

 

This is what I'm making for dinner tonight

 

My head hurts and I'm in a rotten mood today. But I worked out, ate well, and did all the little things that keep us civilized like making the bed and washing all my underwear and stuff like that. I'm going to go swear at the air for a bit and then I'll see y'all later :)

 

 

 

 

Sorry you are in a rotten mood.  Hopefully swearing will make it better.  :)  

Great idea about sending your artwork like that.  

And egg rolls in a bowl - so much YUM. 

  • Like 1

Race: Amazonian Ogre Princess | Class: Ranger | Profession: SuperHero

Level: 19 Ranger | STR 36 | DEX 29 | STA  35 | CON  43 | WIS 35 | CHA 23|

 

Spoiler

 

Epic Quest Avatar Lifting profile | D&D Character Sheet

Accountibillibuddies: Doodlies setting the world alight

Roadmaps: 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021

 

I am not saying I am Wonder Woman. I am just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman together in the same room.

 

Current Challenge: Shello Finally Fitnesses (sort of) and does some other things

Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 789, 10, 11, 12 , 131415, 1617181920, 21, 2223242526272829303132, 33, 3435, 36??

Starting weight = 290.4; Current weight = 269; Total pounds lost: 21.4

 

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16 hours ago, Murphy's Roommate said:

There is something to venting your spleen on the air that can alleviate foul feelings. 

 

 

Good point. 


 

Spoiler

 

My dad is losing his vision. He's pretty damned blind. He can look at things that are backlit, like tablets and TVs. He can't see movies anymore because they're projected, not backlit. He doesn't see our faces a lot. He can't see anything below him, and when he's panicking, he's completely lost, even with his cane. He panics a lot. Who can blame him? It's unnerving not to see. How many times did you ever have to do that dumb ass trust exercise where someone leads you and you're like "get this damn blindfold off!" and he can't. And I realized that there was this part of him that hoped he would be able to see again. And he won't. And now he realizes it. And he's young- only in his early 60's but his eyes suck. He's got myopic degeneration, glaucoma, and cataracts. 

 

THEN his friend said that his wife said my dad should be in a home. B1tch, right?! My dad is in awesome shape. He's in better health than he's been in years! He can do one armed push ups with his feet on a balance ball. He's fit as hell. And he's so fit because he doesn't want to end up in a home like my grandparents. And people say shit to him like "You need a wheelchair!" or "I would kill myself if I were blind". AGAIN, he's fit as hell, so why would he need a wheelchair? One woman suggested he get a motorized one, and my mom finally said to her, How is he supposed to steer when he can't see where's he's going?"  Idiot.  and the people who say they would kill themselves... WTF. WTF!!!

 

Jerks.

 

I drive my dad to the gym and I remind him how proud I am that he never gave up, and that he's really fit and doing things with his life. And when the loss of vision is overwhelming, I tell him that it sucks, I love him, and I'm proud he's my dad, and remind him how much he does for all of us. 

 

Then my mom cries almost daily. Now it's really like every other day. But it's hard to see him struggle, and I think the realization that her husband isn't going to be able to go on the adventures she wants to go on is heart breaking. It's heart breaking to watch him struggle to find things, or do things. She gets overwhelmed with taking care of him, and yet feels guilty about doing things without him.

 

And I'm really, really, tired. I don't cry. I just have trouble breathing sometimes. It's like my insides are screaming but it all hits this ceiling. All my feelings are in control. SO IN CONTROL. But I'm depressed, and angry, and sad. It's all there. I know it's there, but I can't really feel it.  I laugh like I'm trying not to throw up. It's like this "WHAA!" and then air. I cook and clean, because it gives me something to do because I can't work right now. How funny that even now, my parents are out and about having a nice afternoon, and I'm at home and thinking "I really wish I could go to bed right now. Is the day over yet? Maybe I should've just stayed in bed."

 

They talk to me, and I share with them what I've shared with you. I feel a lot of things, but they're all tightly contained. I'm overwhelmed, anxious, and I just need a few days to myself away from the world, the news, and yeah I need some space from my parents to really process and deal with what's happening right now.

 

 

 

I'm failing at this challenge. The weather is finally good, and I bought myself some exercise pants that fit my new, giant ass. I weigh 259 and I think...I know....I need to take care of myself now. I'm not going to win, but I'm going to continue to build healthy habits and challenge myself to get out there and move and not eat my feelings and reach my goals :) I want to be fit!

 

 

 

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I'm sorry you are going through so much.  

Spoiler

People can be such jerks!  I know this has got to be very hard for your dad, and you, and your mom.  People are resilient.  Your dad will learn to adapt; his panic will subside as he adapts.  I bet he will make huge strides as he comes to terms with the reality of losing his sight.  That might be the hardest part - for everyone.  I am glad that you can talk to your parents about how you are feeling though.  I hope this doesn't come across like I am making light of the predicament your family is in.  I have no doubt that this transition is hugely difficult.  

 

Have you thought about seeking some professional help with dealing with your depression and anxiety?

 

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  • Thanks 1

Race: Amazonian Ogre Princess | Class: Ranger | Profession: SuperHero

Level: 19 Ranger | STR 36 | DEX 29 | STA  35 | CON  43 | WIS 35 | CHA 23|

 

Spoiler

 

Epic Quest Avatar Lifting profile | D&D Character Sheet

Accountibillibuddies: Doodlies setting the world alight

Roadmaps: 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021

 

I am not saying I am Wonder Woman. I am just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman together in the same room.

 

Current Challenge: Shello Finally Fitnesses (sort of) and does some other things

Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 789, 10, 11, 12 , 131415, 1617181920, 21, 2223242526272829303132, 33, 3435, 36??

Starting weight = 290.4; Current weight = 269; Total pounds lost: 21.4

 

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1 hour ago, LadyShello said:

Related image

 

I'm sorry you are going through so much.  

  Hide contents

People can be such jerks!  I know this has got to be very hard for your dad, and you, and your mom.  People are resilient.  Your dad will learn to adapt; his panic will subside as he adapts.  I bet he will make huge strides as he comes to terms with the reality of losing his sight.  That might be the hardest part - for everyone.  I am glad that you can talk to your parents about how you are feeling though.  I hope this doesn't come across like I am making light of the predicament your family is in.  I have no doubt that this transition is hugely difficult.  

 

Have you thought about seeking some professional help with dealing with your depression and anxiety?

 

 

 

Thank you Shello!!! 

What you said was perfect. 

 

I've thought about seeking some help, but I can't really afford it. All my mental health care is covered after the deductible on my plan, and I have a big deductible. But I am thinking a part time job is a good idea. The library is hiring a clerk for 10-12 hours a week, and it may just be perfect if they hire me. It's literally right down the street so it wouldn't be a pain to get to, I'd be more involved in the community, And get out of the house a little bit :) 

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