Heidi: Fall

[Heidi]

#Fall - into routine

• Daily:
  • Sleep Chronic Fatigue makes sleep elusive and fitful. Routine helps, so with that I'm hoping to #Fall back into a routine:
  • Sauna or hot bath 
  • Writing a few pages each day, hopefully finding something that can get worked on well enough to turn in for the submission due on November 1. 
  • Knitting It seems to soothe me. Knitting helps me feel as though I'm not a useless slug even when I can barely do anything physically. It's a bonus that Vivian has started knitting with me and we are enjoying planning a blanket for her bed. She's the absolute best, and I am completely blessed to have her in my life. 
• Weekly: 
  • Therapy because a week without it would be tragic.
  • Legal Notes and Log Updates The court date isn't until mid-December, but the weirdness has definitely ramped up and there are lots of little things to take care of and note along the way.
  • Editing The classmates' work will need to have three readings between Nov 1 and Nov 8, with written critiques due Nov. 8.  

 

Mantra: 

#Acceptance leads to #patience.

#Patience leads to #balance.

#Balance leads to #harmony.

#Harmony leads to #peace.

[Snarkyfishguts]

I like how you’ve arranged your priorities into daily and weekly. I hope you can sleep consistently soon and things work out!

[Vibrantella]

On 15/10/2017 at 4:16 AM, Heidi said:

Sauna or hot bath 

Have you experimented with the timing, relative to going to bed?  I found I sleep like a baby after a hot bath with Epsom salt, but a sauna perks me up (probably due to a cold shower afterwards).  Though I don't have a sauna at home, so I've never tried going to bed straight after!

 

Good luck with your challenge!

[Heidi]

The Report so far:

• Daily:
  • Sleep Sleep has been great so far this week. I am more on track with consistent bedtime, and I think the shortening day is really helping by sending the real-life cue of darkness. My partner gets up for work before 4 a.m., so we both are benefiting from an 8:30 bedtime routine. Just for the record, he's the one more likely to stay up than I am, though how he pulls himself out of bed a 3:45 with only five hours' sleep is beyond me. We have turned the lights out around 9 each night. This makes a huge difference.
  • Sauna or hot bath
    • Sauna on Friday and Saturday last week were amazing, and the hot bath helped on other days. 
  • Writing a few pages each day, hopefully finding something that can get worked on well enough to turn in for the submission due on November 1. 
  • Knitting It seems to soothe me. Knitting helps me feel as though I'm not a useless slug even when I can barely do anything physically. It's a bonus that Vivian has started knitting with me and we are enjoying planning a blanket for her bed. She's the absolute best, and I am completely blessed to have her in my life. 
• Weekly: 
  • Therapy was rescheduled to accommodate couples' counseling, which went much better than either of us expected. I'm looking forward to working together going forward, and with the honesty and communication support that therapy provides. This week the individual session is Wednesday. Because I need the one-on-one time, too.
  • Legal Notes and Log Updates I've set up the logs and folders, so hopefully this will be easier to keep up with as it happens.
  • Editing The classmates' work will need to have three readings between Nov 1 and Nov 8, with written critiques due Nov. 8.
  • I wrote a few pages yesterday, and then another few today. I've been better at this recently as a habit, after having fallen out of good practice. I'm looking forward to re-establishing the connection with writing. The submission for November 1st is awaiting edits, and the work for December 1 is in a rough draft stage. All to the good. Also, there is a bit to do yet with the online site for the literary magazine. It's good to have creative work to do.
  • Speaking of creative work, knitting continues to soothe me. It's a bonus that Vivian has started knitting with me and we are enjoying planning a blanket for her bed. She's the absolute best, and I am completely blessed to have her in my life. I started a sweater for myself, and am continuing to work on the blanket for her. She picked out some amazingly bright yarn at the yarn shop when we were there; this stuff doesn't just hurt my  eyes; it made my teeth ache. Well, as anyone who has known me for more than five minutes knew, I had one thought when I finished that test square: This is going to need some black.
  • And sure enough, it was fantastic when the negative space let the beauty of the yarn stand out:
  • There were two co-mediations last week, and both went really well. One was a two hour drive away, and it wiped me out by the time I was home that evening, but I was able to do the one in town the next day. I was pretty much done out after the morning, though, and that's good to know. I'm looking forward to the train service from Roanoke at the end of this month (as if I needed another thing to love about October!), since that will make a world of difference in my energy level going forward.
  • I found out that the conflict resolution center in town doesn't do fee splitting with the mediators, and that really got under my skin. I will of course continue to work with the center for co-mediation, but it's not sitting well with me that the only mediation foundation we have is volunteer only. There is much to think on concerning this.
  • Vivian is a delight. We had a ball at the Fall Festival on Tuesday evening, and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves for the Thursday visit as well. I'm looking forward to a long weekend coming up, since she doesn't have school on Friday.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[maegs]

using the black to set off the colours of the yarn that Vivian chose was a great choice! 

[Heidi]

13 hours ago, maegs said:

using the black to set off the colours of the yarn that Vivian chose was a great choice! 

Thanks! I love it, and secretly bought aonther two skeins to make her a rainbo hearts capelet with the black background.

[DarK_RaideR]

Might be that the picture is too bright, but those colours sure look trippy.

 

Also, hi! Good luck on this challenge, you know I'm here rooting for you.

[Heidi]

On 10/25/2017 at 8:40 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

Might be that the picture is too bright, but those colours sure look trippy.

 

Also, hi! Good luck on this challenge, you know I'm here rooting for you.

Hi, @DarK_RaideR!!

Good to see you again. Man, this is getting to be a difficult aummer-turned-fall, but i'm hoping the work is all to the good.

Thanks for the cheers and good wishes!

How's that Road to Glory going?

 

[DarK_RaideR]

Game-wise, pretty good. Hit Cult size but a minor bump in the economy set me back to Regional size for a bit. I'm hoping I can bounce back and achieve National size before my character becomes too old.

As far the NF challenge goes, I'm doing significantly better. I'm leaving today to go ride my new motorcycle and next weekend I'm doing the back to back Spartan races.

[Heidi]

The rediscovery of small things

I've rediscovered swimming, thanks to an astoundingly obvious revelation that I stumbled on just before Halloween: The family pool is six degrees or so warmer than the lap pool. This makes all the difference for me, and my routine at the gym has shifted accordingly. 

My evening routine has become:
Swim: 440 yards
Hot tub
Sauna: 15 minutes
Shower

 

For now, I'm content to swim a quarter mile when I go, not worrying about time or distance until after I have the routine re-established. I'm beyond happy to have this back. When we were in Richmond on Friday, we had a lovely time and walked over three miles, but still, I missed the pool. So far I have done the new routine six of the past nine days [10/29, 10/30, 11/2, 11/4, 11/5, 11/6] and it's starting to feel real. I'm thinking of dropping the hot tub, since it doesn't really seem to have as much benefit as I want it to, and the staff are keeping it wicked-hot these days. I'm a fan of 102 at most, preferably 101, and the time in the pool is ultimately more satisfying.

After the gym last night, we came home to our routine of dinner and cards. There was fish and roasted root vegetables, a perfectly autumnal offering of food. 

We watched the penultimate episode of The Five, and then we were both tired enough to call it a night. The Five is good enough that I expect to see a review of it in the newsletter soon. That, along with current seasons of Poldark and Mr. Robot are all on the calendar. We can barely fit in an episode a night, and sometimes we can't do that, so three a week is about maxing me out.

We were asleep before 8:30. Of course I woke up at 3:30 to go to the bathroom -- we can change the clocks all we want, but my body knows what time it is.

Today, I'm reading my classmates' offerings, writing a bit more, and feeling blessed to be in the program. I'm also reading Learning to Walk in the Dark, and while I'm not very many pages into it yet, each one speaks deeply to me, intimately so. I read about four pages at a time before I set it aside to let Taylor's words settle into me a bit further. I'm looking forward to voting this evening after working up my critique for November's offering from the Writing Pod. I have enough new material for December's submission already, and that makes me feel solid. I'm not certain what has turned the creative taps to the Wide Open setting, but each time I sit down to write just one small thing before it slips away, I have a page or three before I get up. I'm not complaining; far from it. It's lovely and I'm blessed and deeply grateful. I'm also clearing my calendar of at least one item a day before 3 in order to help accommodate it, because I want to know more about what comes off the nib.

The routine continues to hold me.
If anything is able to see me through this patch in my life to the other side, it will be the routine combined with deep gratitude, acceptance, and a willingness to meet myself on my own terms.

 

The fog yesterday was playing cat-and-mouse with my imagination, haunting and ethereal, trying to convince me that I do not live in the middle of town, near a major intersection, but instead that I live on some mist-enshrouded estate, likely with staff to bring me tea and set the fires. I'm curiously comfortable with that.

[Heidi]

with all the big honking update, i forgot to mention the routine things, and the best part of all: sleep!

I've been getting more consistent sleep and it has been more restful ever since starting swimming. 

This surprises no one, I'm aware, but it's good to know that what we assume still holds true.

Also, I'm now able to go back to sleep after being semi-awake from 4-5, and that's a real benefit. I know that it is weird in the extreme for my body to adjust to sleeping past six, but there you have it sports fans: we have broken the high-octane training at last. Let's hope it holds (by which I mean that I can continue with this routine for the coming six months or so, without having to blow everything up for another office existence. A scholarship would go a long way in that, as usual. Fingers crossed.

 

[maegs]

Whoo sleep! And The Five is so great! Have you watched the last episode yet? 

[Heidi]

10 hours ago, maegs said:

Whoo sleep! And The Five is so great! Have you watched the last episode yet? 

No, we have two episodes left.

It's pretty amazing!

[Heidi]

I'm not going to lie: Tonight I feel a little bit like a badass.
I did indeed skip the hot tub and spent the time in the pool, still swimming, not really meaning to break any records, just hoping that I could keep moving for the whole time.
I swam a half mile before the time was up.
That's right, 880 yards, or twice what I usually do.
I'm pretty certain I'm going to feel it in my arms before this time next week, but that's not going to stop me from going back tomorrow.
And the next day.
And the day after that, too.

I'll let you know how it goes.
Oh, and I did twenty minutes in the sauna too.
What an amazing evening at the gym.

And I'm pretty happy with the election results, too.

[Heidi]

Yesterday was a quarter mile in the pool and fifteen minutes in the sauna, then some very high quality sleep. This swim-and-sauna in the afternoon / early evening is great, and I think I found a Goldilocks zone for timing. I'm worn out Just Right, and Just the Right amount of hungry. The amount of energy I have for house and hangout activity is Just Right, too.

 

We had a potluck with our small spiritual group, another Just Right piece of my life. After we got home, I sent out my critique for the Writing Group, and it was nice to have that done.

 

Also, the U.S. election made big news, with my state of Virginia getting a lot of positive attention. This was all Just Right as well.

 

Today I spent reading and writing and generically being creative before heading to the gym with Vivian and my partner, where we swam and played around in the pool for a half hour ish (900 yards) and the I hit the sauna for 25 minutes before we went home for dinner.

 

Just finished the last episode of The Five. Man, that was so beautiful.

 

Good night, Nerds.

 

 

[Heidi]

No swimming for three days in a row and it's making me cranky.

We did some heavy furniture lifts and rug-toting cardio on Saturday, as well as many many steps as we walked the Village.

Sauna on Sunday after meeting for worship.

We had a very good time all weekend at story time, fun festival at the Y, visiting the yarn store and the toy store, and seeing Friends and playing cards.

 

The relationship is difficult.

Therapy helps, and meeting with women helps and going out for dinner with friends helps.

 

But still.

Swimming needs to happen in my life soon 

[Heidi]

DIdn't get to swimming or to any outings last night as the migraine was really taking a toll, all part of the chronic fatigue reality.

I did get to talk with Vivian, who broke my heart by asking why I hadn't picked her up to go out. Her father had sent me a message at 10:30 in the morning telling me that I couldn't see her, and I accepted that, though it was disappointing to think of her at daycare instead of at a library event. Apparently they told her about it, too, since she mentioned it on Tuesday when I saw her for lunch, so this is doubly sad for her.

 

I did manage to get a very nice sauna trip in, which helped.

And I'm getting some high-quality rest, which is essential, and refreshing in equal measure.

 

I am looking forward to seeing her this afternoon. Violin lessons are at 3:15, and then we are looking forward to playing cards and making cookies after dinner. 

Today I have read and taken a hot bath. No writing yet, as I have three papers due in as many weeks, and a batch of reading to do for each.

 

I have a co-mediation this week and next week here in town, then one out in Richmond, which will bring me to six total, four in this month. Hopefully I'll reach the ten hour mark in December so that I can submit my application for court certification. The mediators in Roanoke are all volunteer, so while it's a calling it's not exactly a career, yet. I do accept private consultations at very reasonable rates for development of visitation schedules and co-parenting plans. This is a new concept in Roanoke, though it's pretty common in other areas around the state, and I'm happy to get the word out that I'm available.

 

The apartment organization is coming along quite well also. We unrolled the carpet in the living room, and it has changed the feel quite a bit. I'm hoping to be able to get a filing cabinet in the coming weeks so that I can unbox all my paperwork and start filing the papers that continue to come in. 

[Heidi]

We all went to the gym after Vivian's violin lesson. I swam 1/4 mile and spent 20 minutes in the sauna, which seems to have helped greatly with the headaches.

Dinner, cards, half an episode of The Crown, and some good sleep.

 

Today I have a Co-mediation in the morning and then reading and a paper to write in the afternoon.

 

I'm planning a rest-and-restore evening after the gym.

 

[Heidi]

Wow. How did it get to be the end of the challenge already? Time for a wrap-up.

 

#Fall - into routine

• Daily:
  • Sleep This was a pretty solid win, and I think I have started down the path well on this. I'll be taking this forward for the next round, and probably for the rest of my life.
  • Sauna or hot bath Again, this was really present, especially later in the challenge, and as a bonus, being in the gym brought swimming back into my life, which was long overdue and helped immeasurably with the sleep goal.
  • Writing I wrote a few pages more often than not, and I have plenty of material to choose from for the December submission. I also read the first of three selections that I need to write papers for, also due in December. The November submission was well-crafted and on time, as were my critiques, which is a solid win.
  • Knitting: I started the Parisian Poorboy dress. I'm about halfway done, for the third time. [This happens a lot when I design on the needle, as anything I work out by working on ends up reworked three or four times.]
• Weekly: 
  • Therapy 4/4 win
  • Legal Notes and Log Updates I've been really good about keeping up the notes. I went through and organized the legal documents, again, so that they will be in order. This will all get to happen again in a month when we go to court, since there will be an additional month of notes, but that's much easier to handle than a year's worth. Yes, dear Reader, it has been over a year that I have been managing this legal carousel with the ex regarding seeing my daughter. If you think it's ridiculous, you're not alone.
  • Editing I did the editing, and I felt it was strong, which is a solid win, as is the timely submission of the critiques. I'm getting my feet under me with this. 

 

Mantra: 

#Acceptance leads to #patience.

#Patience leads to #balance.

#Balance leads to #harmony.

#Harmony leads to #peace.

[Heidi]

Are you ready for one last Hurrah! for 2017?