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Wobbegong

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7 hours ago, PixiePrincessPea said:

I think I found something that will work for me. I found an app called Habitica. It will let me add tasks and such and I can set when they repeat, and which days they are to be done. Its RPG based, so I get XP for completing tasks. I could also lose health if I don't complete something. I think it also sends reminders. I'm testing it out this week. 

 

 

My chart was kind of blah and I kept forgetting to use it even though it was right by my sink in the kitchen. It is not that I hate journalling I just don't have the habit.

 

I think what I want is to be able to mark things off, have it with me to look at, and to be fun or at least nice to look at. I think the app I found will work.

 

If Habitica ends up not being your thing later, I can also recommend Loop Habit Tracker. It's not as fun as Habitica, but good if you want to go simple and measures how "strong" your habit is with repeated attempts. 

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6 hours ago, Teros said:

 

Something about that gif kinda creeps me out.

 
I can see that. Not going to lie, I was about half asleep when I picked that, so I was doing a "that will work moment.
 

5 hours ago, Wobbegong said:

You're already a real-life superhero so I'll let you off the hook without inventing a mundane superpower. ;) 


Who are you talking to? I am no superhero. Isound all like rockstar momming it, but really most days I am just trying to get through the day with everyone alive and where they are suppose to be. Anything else is a bonus.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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15 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

Who are you talking to? I am no superhero. Isound all like rockstar momming it, but really most days I am just trying to get through the day with everyone alive and where they are suppose to be. Anything else is a bonus.

What you don't realize is that given the number of people you keep track of and the number of places they're supposed to be (and let's not forget all the stuff they have to have prepared in advance to be ready to go to that place), just getting "through the day with everyone alive and where they're supposed to be" is a superhuman feat. 

 

And you almost always have bonuses. 

 

So I'm calling you out, Bean! If you saw someone else doing as much stuff as you're doing, would you say "eh, they're just getting through each day as it comes," or would you say "ho dayum that person's gettin it done! Wow!"? You treat my friend Bean nicely and give her some credit for all her awesome. 

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3 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

 

Who are you talking to? I am no superhero. Isound all like rockstar momming it, but really most days I am just trying to get through the day with everyone alive and where they are suppose to be. Anything else is a bonus.

 

I disagree. A superhero mummy gets through the days and does the tough stuff anyway, even though she might want to curl up in bed, put the covers over her head and sleep for 48 hours straight. Pretty sure you're a superhero just for doing the stuff :)

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3 hours ago, Wobbegong said:

What you don't realize is that given the number of people you keep track of and the number of places they're supposed to be (and let's not forget all the stuff they have to have prepared in advance to be ready to go to that place), just getting "through the day with everyone alive and where they're supposed to be" is a superhuman feat. 

 

And you almost always have bonuses. 

 

So I'm calling you out, Bean! If you saw someone else doing as much stuff as you're doing, would you say "eh, they're just getting through each day as it comes," or would you say "ho dayum that person's gettin it done! Wow!"? You treat my friend Bean nicely and give her some credit for all her awesome. 


Okay, first off. Thank you. This is very sweet and You have no idea the funny smile it put on my face.

That being said, I read it to Hubby and he said "I Have been saying it for years, maybe you will believe her."

I don't believe it about myself, yet. I am trying in my own weird way to do so, but some days are harder than others. Especially the ones where things feel like they were forgotten or dropped. Other days, I am getting closer to that whole "Maybe I am better than I think" Confidence has never been my strong suit. So thank you Wobbegong. You really did make my day.

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Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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19 minutes ago, Taoin Sisu said:

 

I disagree. A superhero mummy gets through the days and does the tough stuff anyway, even though she might want to curl up in bed, put the covers over her head and sleep for 48 hours straight. Pretty sure you're a superhero just for doing the stuff :)

 

Thank you Taoin. There are plenty of days where hiding in bed sounds good. Today was one. I guess I have a hard time seeing it like that when I know moms in harder situations doing more than I am, and I think "wow, look at her go" and less than 5 minutes later I mess something up, and I compare myself to the other mom, and decide I am no where near ready for my superhero badge. 

So its a matter of going "So what did I do today." Which is step 1 I guess.

 

  • Like 2

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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3 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

I guess I have a hard time seeing it like that when I know moms in harder situations doing more than I am, and I think "wow, look at her go" and less than 5 minutes later I mess something up, and I compare myself to the other mom, and decide I am no where near ready for my superhero badge. 

 

I suspect this situation is very similar to everything else in life. That other mom is looking at you and wishing she was half the mother you are. Remember, when you see her all calm with her happy and smiling children at the playground, you don't see the whole picture. You're not seeing the absolute disaster that their breakfast was, that the kids were dragged literally screaming off to day care yesterday, or the fact their wearing the same clothes for the fourth day in a row for whatever reason (hopefully tantrums and not a lack of clothes!)

 

One of the biggest and most challenging hurdles to overcome for anyone who goes to the gym for the first time, is the near-panic of knowing that everyone else there is going to be stronger, faster, and fitter than they are. The thought of standing off to the corner and trying not to be noticed while doing curls with dumbbells that are about half the size of the ones that scrawny teenager/girl over there is using, is terrifying. The few complete newbies who stick it out, are the ones who learn to stop comparing themselves to everyone around them, because they realize that we all work with different circumstances and we come from different backgrounds. 

 

I used the gym analogy because I'm not a mom myself, so I have no frames of reference for that, but it seems to me the same principle applies here.

 

It's not a competition. If it absolutely has to be, compete against yourself and yourself only. Not against others. For all you know that other mom has a house keeper, laundry service, and gets her groceries delivered... of course she's well rested and patient with her children, she has nothing else to do!

 

Go easy on yourself.

  • Like 5

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

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4 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

 

Thank you Taoin. There are plenty of days where hiding in bed sounds good. Today was one. I guess I have a hard time seeing it like that when I know moms in harder situations doing more than I am, and I think "wow, look at her go" and less than 5 minutes later I mess something up, and I compare myself to the other mom, and decide I am no where near ready for my superhero badge. 

So its a matter of going "So what did I do today." Which is step 1 I guess.

 

 

No worries. By the way, if you walk up to one of those mums and say "wow it's amazing how much you get done, you must be a super mum, how do you do it?" they'll probably say "by the skin of my teeth" and "I'm sooo not a super mum, but thank you?" Or in one case for one mum who had two kids (I always look for tips, I only have one) it was "actually I'm lucky, we have an au pair to help". If they give you a solid tip, that's gold, if they say breezily "oh its so easy" move along because the grand parents do all the childcare. Usually they commiserate... 

 

We all struggle, just like our mums did. Thing is, our mums have mostly forgotten what it was like (admittedly my mum will be 80 next year) :D

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24 minutes ago, scalyfreak said:

 

I suspect this situation is very similar to everything else in life. That other mom is looking at you and wishing she was half the mother you are. Remember, when you see her all calm with her happy and smiling children at the playground, you don't see the whole picture. You're not seeing the absolute disaster that their breakfast was, that the kids were dragged literally screaming off to day care yesterday, or the fact their wearing the same clothes for the fourth day in a row for whatever reason (hopefully tantrums and not a lack of clothes!)

 

One of the biggest and most challenging hurdles to overcome for anyone who goes to the gym for the first time, is the near-panic of knowing that everyone else there is going to be stronger, faster, and fitter than they are. The thought of standing off to the corner and trying not to be noticed while doing curls with dumbbells that are about half the size of the ones that scrawny teenager/girl over there is using, is terrifying. The few complete newbies who stick it out, are the ones who learn to stop comparing themselves to everyone around them, because they realize that we all work with different circumstances and we come from different backgrounds. 

 

I used the gym analogy because I'm not a mom myself, so I have no frames of reference for that, but it seems to me the same principle applies here.

 

It's not a competition. If it absolutely has to be, compete against yourself and yourself only. Not against others. For all you know that other mom has a house keeper, laundry service, and gets her groceries delivered... of course she's well rested and patient with her children, she has nothing else to do!

 

Go easy on yourself.

 

This. 

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15 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

 Who are you talking to? I am no superhero. Isound all like rockstar momming it, but really most days I am just trying to get through the day with everyone alive and where they are suppose to be. Anything else is a bonus.

 

That is like 99% of mom life.

 

11 hours ago, Taoin Sisu said:

 

I disagree. A superhero mummy gets through the days and does the tough stuff anyway, even though she might want to curl up in bed, put the covers over her head and sleep for 48 hours straight. Pretty sure you're a superhero just for doing the stuff :)

 

Is sleeping for 48 hours straight an option? Because that sounds amazing!

 

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8 hours ago, Taoin Sisu said:

 

No worries. By the way, if you walk up to one of those mums and say "wow it's amazing how much you get done, you must be a super mum, how do you do it?" they'll probably say "by the skin of my teeth" and "I'm sooo not a super mum, but thank you?" Or in one case for one mum who had two kids (I always look for tips, I only have one) it was "actually I'm lucky, we have an au pair to help". If they give you a solid tip, that's gold, if they say breezily "oh its so easy" move along because the grand parents do all the childcare. Usually they commiserate... 

I know some of them have help from family, and one fully admits to not making dinners since they all eat at different times (Baby eats at 5, Eldest child eats at 7. She eats at 8, husband home at 10). so its more insta meals and her eldest is with her dad 2 nights and every other weekend. But this is my point, I am not superhuman.

 

8 hours ago, Taoin Sisu said:

We all struggle, just like our mums did. Thing is, our mums have mostly forgotten what it was like (admittedly my mum will be 80 next year) :D

I am a mom and we make it work most of the time.  My mom hasn't forgotten. SHe just says "This is why young people have kids" and moves on. LOL

  • Like 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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9 hours ago, scalyfreak said:

 

I suspect this situation is very similar to everything else in life. That other mom is looking at you and wishing she was half the mother you are. Remember, when you see her all calm with her happy and smiling children at the playground, you don't see the whole picture. You're not seeing the absolute disaster that their breakfast was, that the kids were dragged literally screaming off to day care yesterday, or the fact their wearing the same clothes for the fourth day in a row for whatever reason (hopefully tantrums and not a lack of clothes!)

 

One of the biggest and most challenging hurdles to overcome for anyone who goes to the gym for the first time, is the near-panic of knowing that everyone else there is going to be stronger, faster, and fitter than they are. The thought of standing off to the corner and trying not to be noticed while doing curls with dumbbells that are about half the size of the ones that scrawny teenager/girl over there is using, is terrifying. The few complete newbies who stick it out, are the ones who learn to stop comparing themselves to everyone around them, because they realize that we all work with different circumstances and we come from different backgrounds. 

 

I used the gym analogy because I'm not a mom myself, so I have no frames of reference for that, but it seems to me the same principle applies here.

 

It's not a competition. If it absolutely has to be, compete against yourself and yourself only. Not against others. For all you know that other mom has a house keeper, laundry service, and gets her groceries delivered... of course she's well rested and patient with her children, she has nothing else to do!

 

Go easy on yourself.

 

This is what I am learning to do. I am a work in progress, and while I come from the "I must always be perfect" I am doing better about it. And the gym is the perfect analogy, so you were fine there. The hard part is doing. I don't generally compare myself to others. I compare myself to who I want to be. I want to be able to do all this, and more and be healthier in the process. It is a matter of getting there. Problem is, as a result, I don't see superhuman. I see Tuesday.

 

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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28 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

 

This is what I am learning to do. I am a work in progress, and while I come from the "I must always be perfect" I am doing better about it. And the gym is the perfect analogy, so you were fine there. The hard part is doing. I don't generally compare myself to others. I compare myself to who I want to be. I want to be able to do all this, and more and be healthier in the process. It is a matter of getting there. Problem is, as a result, I don't see superhuman. I see Tuesday.

 

 

Have you considered turning this upside down and comparing yourself to who you used to be instead?

 

That's how I got over the gym thing. I realized that if I continued to compare myself to my goal, the comparison would forever end with me concluding that I was "still not good enough", and that wasn't good for my self esteem. Or for motivating myself to go to the gym, for that matter. So I started tracking my workout progress in a gym journal. I write down the exercise I'm doing, the number of repetitions and sets, and how much weight I was using. When I start to feel discouraged I flip back to a couple of months ago, and look at the weight column. I used to struggle with that lower weight... and today I lifted nearly twice as much. THAT is a good feeling. :)

 

I personally find it easier to stay motivated if I look at how far I have already come, as opposed to how much further I still have to go before I reach my destination.

 

Life is to some extent just like weight lifting - it never gets easy, but if you keep trying anyway it will make you stronger, and it gets easier.

  • Like 4

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

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47 minutes ago, scalyfreak said:

Life is to some extent just like weight lifting - it never gets easy, but if you keep trying anyway it will make you stronger, and it gets easier.

Of course, the corollary to this is that as you get stronger, you start taking on more weight, so you're always working at your limit and never really notice how much easier it's getting. 

 

That's why it's important to take scalyfreak's suggestion and look back at where you used to be: you can see, "oh, I remember back then, I wasn't in school and I hadn't been injured yet so I didn't have any homework or PT to do and I could run on the treadmill every day. I used to think that was a struggle, LOL."  I see you saying "if only I could go back to how it was before I was injured" all the time. Just think of it as some extra weight added to the bar: you're lifting heavier now. It's tough. But you're stronger for dealing with it and staying on top of it along with everything else you already had going on, and as you continue at this level, you'll get better at it. You'll recover, and things will start to get better. 

 

And then someone will dump a project in your lap and your resistance will go up again and you'll have to start over and it'll feel awful like you never get out on top no matter what. But you'll still have a record to look back on and remind you of how far you've come. :) And if you forget, we'll remind you. 

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For the record, in lifting as well as in life, you can get back to where you were before an injury. It just takes a time and a lot more effort than it took to get there the first time. But you're not going back to anything, you are not turning back time until you are exactly the same way you were at that point in your past. You are moving forward until you get back to the mile stone you passed before something forced you to go backwards for a while. And then you keep going. And if you have to limp, or crawl, or ask someone to drag you in order to keep moving forward, that's what you do. :)

  • Like 2

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

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9 hours ago, scalyfreak said:

 

Have you considered turning this upside down and comparing yourself to who you used to be instead?

 

Yes, but long story short, I use to be better, even in the last year and a half than I am now, which gets me more upset. I Know compared to 3 or 5 years ago, or even 10, I am so much better, but compared to the lady who ran regularly and had a 15 minute mile once, I am not there now, and it depresses me. Neither way I look at it atm, is helpful, I need to focus on the now and not looking back or forward and I am aware of that.

 

9 hours ago, scalyfreak said:

That's how I got over the gym thing. I realized that if I continued to compare myself to my goal, the comparison would forever end with me concluding that I was "still not good enough", and that wasn't good for my self esteem. Or for motivating myself to go to the gym, for that matter. So I started tracking my workout progress in a gym journal. I write down the exercise I'm doing, the number of repetitions and sets, and how much weight I was using. When I start to feel discouraged I flip back to a couple of months ago, and look at the weight column. I used to struggle with that lower weight... and today I lifted nearly twice as much. THAT is a good feeling. :)

 

I personally find it easier to stay motivated if I look at how far I have already come, as opposed to how much further I still have to go before I reach my destination.

 

Sometimes this does help, and I do try to look at the big picture. Sometimes it doesn't

 

9 hours ago, scalyfreak said:

Life is to some extent just like weight lifting - it never gets easy, but if you keep trying anyway it will make you stronger, and it gets easier.

This is the truth. Totally, and I am trying. I just also ma trying to overdo because of my own insecurities, and the only way I see to deal with those, is to tackle them, which leads to adding more to a very full plate.  Right now, I am focusing on the balance for doing it all, and still having sanity left.

 

  • Like 1

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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8 hours ago, Wobbegong said:

Of course, the corollary to this is that as you get stronger, you start taking on more weight, so you're always working at your limit and never really notice how much easier it's getting. 

 

This is what Hubby things. I haven't seen the changes becasue well, I add more the minute I have a bit of energy (Or before).

 

8 hours ago, Wobbegong said:

That's why it's important to take scalyfreak's suggestion and look back at where you used to be: you can see, "oh, I remember back then, I wasn't in school and I hadn't been injured yet so I didn't have any homework or PT to do and I could run on the treadmill every day. I used to think that was a struggle, LOL."  I see you saying "if only I could go back to how it was before I was injured" all the time. Just think of it as some extra weight added to the bar: you're lifting heavier now. It's tough. But you're stronger for dealing with it and staying on top of it along with everything else you already had going on, and as you continue at this level, you'll get better at it. You'll recover, and things will start to get better. 

 I do this. I really do. I am stiuck with the "If i hadn't had that surgery" loop which makes me feel worse. I am not where I was before it, and I know it. But I am not giving up. At the same time, its harder when I go to that damn dentist and instead of "Your doing so much better" I get "Your not doing enough." I have multiple places where this is what I hear every day. Not celebrations of accomplishments, but reminders that I am not there yet. So its hard to see the upsides here, and I know that. I am just trying to do things my own way and get it done. 

 

8 hours ago, Wobbegong said:

And then someone will dump a project in your lap and your resistance will go up again and you'll have to start over and it'll feel awful like you never get out on top no matter what. But you'll still have a record to look back on and remind you of how far you've come. :) And if you forget, we'll remind you. 

I do look back at my Journal sometimes. Sometimes it shows me good, sometimes bad. But all I got is now, and maybe the future. So thats what I focus on. That and the feeling I Get when I do 2 minutes of knee sits, or I carry the 40 lb bag of compost around the house. Things that I know the people who tear me down can't or won't do. I need to prove them wrong that I won't end up like them. Because, if I slip, I could.

and now, you have seen into my crazy, so its okay to run.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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1 hour ago, Bean Sidhe said:

 

Yes, but long story short, I use to be better, even in the last year and a half than I am now, which gets me more upset. I Know compared to 3 or 5 years ago, or even 10, I am so much better, but compared to the lady who ran regularly and had a 15 minute mile once, I am not there now, and it depresses me. Neither way I look at it atm, is helpful, I need to focus on the now and not looking back or forward and I am aware of that.

 

That's the important part. When all is said and done, whatever you should be doing is what works for you, not what others swear has worked great for them.

  • Like 3

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

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Happy Thanksgiving to everyone who celebrated it today. :) 

 

I have so much leftover gravy I'm going to have to freeze some of it...!

 

Life is good. :) 

  • Like 3

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

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Howdy! Good to be back after a month away!

 

My main page is "Mahalak's Back to the Basics, Part 2," so...

giphy.gif

 

My mundane superpower would be the ability to pay timeless attention to what is. Which would not be mundane at all.

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*Member of 2018 Hogwarts House Cup Championship Team*

If you're walking down the right path and you're willing to keep walking, eventually you'll make progress. -Barack Obama

Anyone who moves on, even a little, walks like Jesus on the water. -Antonio Machado

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