Jump to content

Bean Sidhe Vs Chaos: Entering the Library


Bean Sidhe

Recommended Posts

Next time I brush my dog, I'm making one of those! :D

  • Like 3

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

Link to post
7 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

So when you all say "you do it all" no, I don't there is dog fur and cat fur lining my hallway in big enough clumps that you can't see the floor.

If it makes you feel better, I have this issue too, but it's cat hair and my hair. =P

  • Like 3
  • Haha 1

Level 69 Battle Kitten

Profile photo is ancient but I'm too lazy to change it. 

Battle Log | Current Challenge

MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo

                                                                                                                                                                 Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie

Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie

C'est dit, c'est ainsi

Link to post
5 hours ago, Sylvaa said:

 

Dog hair tumbleweeds are my life. I swear to goodness, I can sweep my entire downstairs and the next day I find like 7 more. It is a never ending battle! 

 

So I've got nothing to say but solidarity! 

 

Our old dog (Husky Lab mix) use to leave tumbleweeds. Those I can handle. Agent K9 leaves this little black hairs everywhere that look like mold. Agent Black isn't helping. Then you add that no in (including the 2 males) have hair shorter than their shoulders and the other cat, and I expect hair. But it was one too much this morning. Hair is a factor of life. Its why I went to all solid surface floors. Burning up a vacuum every 6 months wasn't worth it. (And yes, even the pet hair friendly ones).

  • Like 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
2 hours ago, farflight said:

Given all the things you've got going, and the stuff that life seems to enjoy throwing, I'd say....yes...amazing.

 

Thank you.

 

2 hours ago, farflight said:

Also, good to see where you landed. Haven't seen your posts in awhile as I dove into the lvl 1 challenges and have spent mucho time in warriors section...lots of stuff 

 

I am still here. I am glad to see you again. I have been hiding in the Rebles the last challenge or so, This time I am trying to branch out a bit more. I will wander over and see what you are up to next.

 

2 hours ago, farflight said:

You ARE amazing. I know I struggled with believing that about myself (and still struggle). It is a constant challenge to remind myself that I AM amazing, I am good enough, I AM fighting the good fight. And that freaking rocks. To go all Carl Sagan...tumblr_ltqwu3ZarN1qe9qi2o1_500.jpg?resiz

 

As a science geek, this is awesome and Thank you for it. I do struggle with the "Am I good enough" enough to where that is my big epic goal. To finally feel like I am enough, enough of so many things. ANd it is a struggle, especially when for many many years, too many, I was taught that I was not, and never would be.

 

2 hours ago, farflight said:

Or as a pastor at a local church used to say, "God [or whatever you want to call him/her/it/Allah/Grandmother/Spirit/RandomChance], didn't think the world would be perfect without you in it, just as you are." Still gets me every time I think I'm failing flat on my face. In the past, and still some now, whenever someone would give me a compliment I'd immediately discount it. Which was me essentially telling them they were wrong in their opinion, when in reality, I just didn't (and still sometimes don't) believe it or see it myself. 

 

Now, I'm not saying I want to go around touting how awesome I am, the point is, I'm fighting the fight, you are definitely fighting the fight...and THAT IS AWESOME.

 

Following and rooting you on. Keep up the awesome work!

 

This is wonderful. Thank you. I am trying, and yes, there sometimes seem to be days with more "Well, hello floor" than not, but we keep trying. Just like we keep trying to do so many other things and get to where we want to be.  I am trying to get better about accepting compliments, but  my default setting is guilty, followed closely by not good enough. I am slowly working on those 2.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
19 minutes ago, scalyfreak said:

 

So do you have a golden retriever or a labrador? :P

 

What we thought was a Black lab/Newfie mix is now more a black labraderp/terrier. SO you were very close.

 

19 minutes ago, scalyfreak said:

My black lab sheds once a year, for 365 days straight.

 

Thats about right. That reminds me, he is due for a bath soon. So the tub can be black as well.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
18 minutes ago, Sylvaa said:

 

German Shepherd. 

 

HHoFPju.jpg

OMG.. This was my our last dog, and Agent kitty who passed away over the summer. I am not kidding you, I could make carbon copies of them both my just running my hand over them.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
12 minutes ago, fleaball said:

If it makes you feel better, I have this issue too, but it's cat hair and my hair. =P

 

Oh no, My hair is involved, as is the rest of the house. The one with the shortest hair in the house now is Agent K9. I shed worse than anyone, since I comb my hair and I walk away with a pile of hair just sitting there.

And I don't mind it 99.5% if of the time, but this morning, after a night of "Why do I try" it hit a nerve. It was one more thing I wasn't doing right.

  • Like 2

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
Just now, Bean Sidhe said:

 

Oh no, My hair is involved, as is the rest of the house. The one with the shortest hair in the house now is Agent K9. I shed worse than anyone, since I comb my hair and I walk away with a pile of hair just sitting there.

And I don't mind it 99.5% if of the time, but this morning, after a night of "Why do I try" it hit a nerve. It was one more thing I wasn't doing right.

Yeah, I wind up with a bunch of it in my lap when I'm done combing it, and I just can't be bothered. 

 

I know the comment from the kid's friend wasn't what you needed to hear, but can you just try to remind yourself that this thing in particular is a never-ending battle so maybe you're better off focusing your energy on other projects? (Easier said than done, I know.)

  • Like 3

Level 69 Battle Kitten

Profile photo is ancient but I'm too lazy to change it. 

Battle Log | Current Challenge

MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo

                                                                                                                                                                 Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie

Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie

C'est dit, c'est ainsi

Link to post

So I originally got on here to state that the day didn't get better, and it hadn't until I logged in. Thank you to @Sylvaa, @farflight, @fleaball, and  @scalyfreak  for cheering me up. You guys remind me why I like it here so much. Everyone is so great about rallying around someone when they need it and today I kinda needed it. 

The-Librarians-Jassandra-Hug-1.gif  

  • Like 5

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
4 minutes ago, fleaball said:

Yeah, I wind up with a bunch of it in my lap when I'm done combing it, and I just can't be bothered. 

 

Me too, I got to the point I just started combing it when I am outside with the dog in the morning. at least then its out there and not inhere.

 

4 minutes ago, fleaball said:

I know the comment from the kid's friend wasn't what you needed to hear, but can you just try to remind yourself that this thing in particular is a never-ending battle so maybe you're better off focusing your energy on other projects? (Easier said than done, I know.)

I am better about it now. Mostly with all of your help. I know my house will never be a showhouse (I would hate to live in one of those) and I know its better than it use to be (I remember breaking a table since it was so full of junk). And it doesn't help when Blarg is on a rampage, so time to get him back under control and maybe sweep tonight. The dog hair is trying to take over the entire halway. I bet after the Agents and us have a talk tonight about the lack of help recently, I can get one of them to do it.

  • Like 5

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
38 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

So I originally got on here to state that the day didn't get better, and it hadn't until I logged in. Thank you to @Sylvaa, @farflight, @fleaball, and  @scalyfreak  for cheering me up. You guys remind me why I like it here so much. Everyone is so great about rallying around someone when they need it and today I kinda needed it. 

The-Librarians-Jassandra-Hug-1.gif  

 

So is this a bad time to mention that I am not at all a hugging kind of person...? :P

 

*ducks and runs away*

  • Like 3

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

Link to post
5 minutes ago, Sylvaa said:

 

Same. But we can high five! (And then wash our hands :D)

 

giphy.gif

  • Like 2

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

Link to post
1 hour ago, Sylvaa said:

 

Same. But we can high five! (And then wash our hands :D)

 

1 hour ago, scalyfreak said:

 

So is this a bad time to mention that I am not at all a hugging kind of person...? :P

 

*ducks and runs away*

 

Okay, noted for next time. Sorry about that.

 

qrxpA.gif

  • Like 2

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post

So, I just made the entire SORTED list of doom. Its only 10 pages. Now do note, that sounds horrible, but the last one I had 2 years ago was 11 and I wasn't in school then (So an entire new section was added). Plus, Christmas wasn't a thing either. So overall, I feel really good since the old one I got down to 7 pages before I added a bunch of new stuff. I call that a win.

  • Like 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post

Update Part B list... Progress is being made. even if the list is getting longer. (purple is things I have added since last time).

  • Figure out why roof is leaking

  • Change signature

  • Update bullet journal

  • Activity for boy last night

  • edit this list

  • Pull Brocolli, leeks and brussel sprouts

  • Set up challenge

  • Help at Youngest class

  • Figure out when I need to help in class

  • Move berry pots

  • Thanksgiving

  • Proper list of doom

  • Teacher Appreciation in Dec

  • Figure out Hubby Work dinner

  • Hubby work dinner?

  • Agents December Calendar

  • Schedule Chosen Family Christmas

  • schedule another family Christmas – Confirm??

  • holiday shopping (Hope to be done by end of challenge)

    • Icelandic Book flood for Agents

    • Drop ship Holiday shopping

  • Wrap holiday presents

    • Make label table for mail merge

    • Mail merge Christmas labels

    • Make sure have enough family labels

  • Family letters for family far away

    • Find pictures for family letters

    • Print off pictures for family letters

  • Youngest Winter party (help at school)

  • Get stuff for winter party

  • Sign up for winter party

  • Make dentist appt  with real dentist

  • Finish up work for Winter break

  • email out version one of christmas lists

  • clean up christmas list and email out version 2

  • School

    • Big project about Ants (in process)

    • Extra credit in technical class

    • last of regular week homework

    • FINALS

    • Last part of big paper in other class

  • Holiday cards

    • Design

    • print

    • mail  

  • Schedule Youngest Agent's birthday Party

  • Plan Youngest Agents Birthday

  • Invitations for Birthday party

    • Design  (MOSTLY DONE)

    • Print

    • Mail

  • Decorate outside

    • Roof

    • yard

  • Decorate inside

    • Make room for tree

    • Put up tree

    • Put up tree with lights

    • Put ornaments up

    • Decorate other stuff that is not Tree

 

  • Like 5

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
Just now, Bean Sidhe said:

So, I just made the entire SORTED list of doom. Its only 10 pages. Now do note, that sounds horrible, but the last one I had 2 years ago was 11 and I wasn't in school then (So an entire new section was added). Plus, Christmas wasn't a thing either. So overall, I feel really good since the old one I got down to 7 pages before I added a bunch of new stuff. I call that a win.

I'm not sure what this says about me, but my first thought was "oh, that's not bad at all." It's still a shit ton of stuff, but somehow when you were talking about it before I expected like, 20 pages of stuff and the whole time was like "omg poor Bean." 

 

I'm still definitely thinking "omg poor Bean" because it sounds overwhelming as hell, but I'm glad your list turned out relatively short and you feel good about it. And I have full faith that you'll get it all done in time, because whether you believe it or not, you are awesome and know how to get shit DONE. 

  • Like 3

Level 69 Battle Kitten

Profile photo is ancient but I'm too lazy to change it. 

Battle Log | Current Challenge

MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo

                                                                                                                                                                 Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie

Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie

C'est dit, c'est ainsi

Link to post
5 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

So, I just made the entire SORTED list of doom.

You've mentioned this but I haven't thought to ask even though I wondered...where did this list of doom originate? What's on it? How do you sort it? Inquiring minds want to know!

  • Like 4

J3NN

Current Challenge || Challenges: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9  10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17  18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25

Link to post
7 hours ago, J3NN said:

You've mentioned this but I haven't thought to ask even though I wondered...where did this list of doom originate? What's on it? How do you sort it? Inquiring minds want to know!

 

Okay, the list of doom started a few years ago. I started getting overwhelmed when I went back to working days (and my hours like tripled) with keeping straight EVERYTHING that has to get done to keep us running. Up till then, I was home all day with kids and then worked in the evenings so I could handle everything.
 

Do note, My brain has a mobius strip/loop in it. If I get too many things rattling around in there that need done, They start repeating and the list never ends, it just keeps going. So Hubby had me do what we call a brain dump. I just write EVERYTHING that needs done out into a list, either on the pc or on paper. The goal here is to dump EVERYTHING out of my head.  Well that was good for ending the loop, but I could never remember if I wrote something down later and when the list is like 6 pages long typed (Or longer) its a pain to find things to cross them off.

 

So I started sorting it. So I have things like "Dr appts" and then the appts I need to make or have scheduled under it. Same for garden, I have everything from buy compost to move berry pots to order seeds to start in Jan to set up seed starting rig. Anything that applies to the garden, goes in that section. Clean kitchen has everything from wipe down counter, to a list of every counter that needs cleaned out and reogranized as well as taking down the curtains and cleaning them or wiping down the front of the cabinets (Wait, I forgot that one, I need to add it).  So every job that needs done for the entire house and family is written down. And yes, sometimes it as simple as "pick up that paper on the floor int he computer room that everyone keeps rolling their chair on"

 

Now, as for what I do with this list, I leave it where Hubby can find it. He will periodically go over and check if there are things he can do. Yes, some are his job like re caulk the tub, but some are ones that I may be too busy to and he will get it done (Like cleaning off the blankets that had dirt in on them from fixing my car's hinges to bring in to wash) or maybe delegate an Agent (clean bathroom down mirror). He's really good about it the first few days, but after that, well, sometimes I need to remind him.

The big thing is, I am the only one who sometimes sees this this stuff. Hubby kept telling me to let him know what needed done. This is my way of doing that without feeling like I was nagging him to help me. If I add stuff off it to the daily list, or make a point to look it at when I am not swamped, it helps. But not going to lie, 11 full pages of things to do can be overwhelming. But in about a month or so, hopefully I can sit down and brain dump and update, and it will be better. If not, then I can at least feel like I didn't forget anything.

  • Like 5

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
12 hours ago, fleaball said:

I'm not sure what this says about me, but my first thought was "oh, that's not bad at all." It's still a shit ton of stuff, but somehow when you were talking about it before I expected like, 20 pages of stuff and the whole time was like "omg poor Bean." 

 

That is pretty much how it works. The list of doom has been 20 pages, but some of that, my challenge stuff has helped. Its still not pretty and its still a million things to do, but its better than I expected too. And hopefully this will help me get stuff done. The thing is, nothing on there is a daily or weekly job. So keep my desk clean or weekly cook isn't on there, it is just jobs that are once a month or less.

 

12 hours ago, fleaball said:

I'm still definitely thinking "omg poor Bean" because it sounds overwhelming as hell, but I'm glad your list turned out relatively short and you feel good about it. And I have full faith that you'll get it all done in time, because whether you believe it or not, you are awesome and know how to get shit DONE. 

 

Thank you Flea. I try to get shit done. I am not going to lie, it doesn't always happen, or there are times I am dancing on a deadline, but for right now, just having the list outside my head so I can focus again without the "Oh yeah, and this" helps. And if I have an "Oh yeah, and this" I can write it down (either typed or hand written) and move on.

  • Like 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post

Yesterday was long. We did end up talking to the Agents about being more helpful.  And I worked on my project and figured out a tricky piece and I got the list of doom made. I really kinda want some sleep and some down time, but its been very busy of late.

oh and we got an invite to a birthday party in 4 days. 4 days. The parents even laughed about "oh we are so bad at planning" which means my weekend of homework and project work just went up in smoke. Now I need to reschedule everything. I am kinda annoyed, but they are good friends, so we will go. But Seriously, why is planning becoming a superpower like common sense. This is the 5th time in a week someone has done the "OH yeah I have a thing I need you at" Ugh.

Anyway, goals went well. Positive thing was getting that list done which hopefully means I get some help.

 

May not be around much. Today is usual crazy plus some extra crazy. Here is to hoping I dont finally snap.

 

Goal

Description

11/28/2017

Plan like Flynn

Plan

y

Strong Like Eve

Leg lifts

15

 

sit ups

30

 

Push ups

17

 

Reverse sit ups

10

Flexible like Ezekiel

Wrist Extension Stretch

y

 

Upward dog/Child pose

y

 

Butterfly

y

 

Ballet/toe Touch

y

Focus on Family like Stone

Spend time with Agents

y

Be Postive like Cassandra

One good thing

y

Lady of the Lake

120 oz water

y

Keep thing Tidy Like Jenkins

Pennisula/Island

y

 

Table

y

 

Desk

y

 

Bathroom up

y

Be Organized like the Library

Bedroom

n

 

Computer room

y

 

Basement

y

Fly like Cal

Walk 10500 steps

y

 

Walk 15 minutes a day

y

 

Total points for day 10/10

Total points for entire challenge 54.75/60

  • Like 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

Link to post
25 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

oh and we got an invite to a birthday party in 4 days. 4 days. The parents even laughed about "oh we are so bad at planning" which means my weekend of homework and project work just went up in smoke. Now I need to reschedule everything. I am kinda annoyed, but they are good friends, so we will go. But Seriously, why is planning becoming a superpower like common sense. This is the 5th time in a week someone has done the "OH yeah I have a thing I need you at" Ugh.
 

 

Your planned weekend is lost only if you actually go to the party. Will someone's life be ruined if you don't? 

 

By ruined I'm not talking about hurt feelings that lead to passive-aggressive sniping at you every time they see you for the next few months. While that kind of behavior is unpleasant and can be hurtful, a lack of planning on someone else's part does not automatically mean an obligation to work your hind parts off to make things work out for them, on yours.

 

Planning ahead is not a superpower. I doubt everyone has the kinds of lists you do (or the need for them!), but most of us have some notion of how much advance notice friends and family need for things.The ones with two toddlers and lots of social obligations need to be told about parties several weeks before they happen. The ones who are single and have no children are can usually make it on less than a week's notice, but it's still rude not to give someone more time. Just because they aren't a parent or a social butterfly doesn't mean they don't have plans they don't like having interrupted.

 

The phrase, "I'm really sorry, but I already have plans for that weekend and I can't change them on this short notice", seems to work well in these situations. It may not be possible for you to use it in this birthday party scenario, but it might be worth your while to prepare it and keep it at hand for other poorly planned requests?

  • Like 4

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

Link to post
1 hour ago, Bean Sidhe said:

Here is to hoping I dont finally snap.

I dunno, the snap is painful...but tasting colors on the other side is kinda nice :-D, plus, you're your own party 1340292788624_418751.png no more "Looking for group" ques to worry about :D. 

 

I've got a few friends (surprising) who when asked "How's it going" or "How are you" ALWAYS respond with "Going crazy" to which I've started replying a couple of ways either 1) "Well you've been going crazy for awhile, you must be taking you sweet ass time" or (my fav) 2) "could you hurry it up, the voices in my head are getting bored!"

 

Yea, the "non planners" need to get the shit together. Happens all the time with my brother in law..."Oh, you 30 miles outside of memphis? Let me drop everything so I can cater to your fat ass." 

 

39 minutes ago, scalyfreak said:

"I'm really sorry, but I already have plans for that weekend and I can't change them on this short notice"

This seems so rude and unnatural in today's society, its been really hard for me to say no to people in the past (especially if it's something I kinda wanted to do or it helps me put off something I didn't want to be doing). Personally, I'm getting better at it, along with not being a rescuer of others. I used to pester people until they told me what was really bothering them, now, I ask once "Whats wrong? Is everything alright?" often they reply in a very frustrated/exasperated tone "I'm fine!" to which I now simply reply with something like "Okay, I'm going back to cook dinner, lemme know if you need/want me" or "Alright, I'll be taking the dog for that walk now, I've got my phone."

 

Part of the responsibility DOES lie with them to ask for what they need, its not my job to do everything for everyone else (I have enough of my own demons and OCD tendencies to worry about)...shhhh...the voices are calling! EXCELSIOR!

 

It'll get better Bean. I'll be praying/sending happy voices your way. Something to consider, divide and conquer? Send hubby Agent and little agents to the party and you could have some quiet time at home to do the stuff you need to do without them being underfoot

  • Like 4

Fitbit username: farflight   (would love to have more people on there)

Getting life in order is a challenge worth doing.

 

Happiness is the journey, not the destination (took me forever to learn that)

Link to post
37 minutes ago, farflight said:

This seems so rude and unnatural in today's society, its been really hard for me to say no to people in the past (especially if it's something I kinda wanted to do or it helps me put off something I didn't want to be doing). Personally, I'm getting better at it, along with not being a rescuer of others.

 

We are discovering a fundamental difference between our two personalities... :P

 

In my mind, the person who expects me to drop everything to cater to their inability to plan ahead, is the rude one. To take for granted that I can and will drop everything else to cater to their whims, is actually a bit insulting. That doesn't mean telling them that I'm too busy and they need to give more advance notice in the future is easy or enjoyable to do, especially not if the people in question are family, or friends who have been acting this way for decades. All of a sudden, now it bothers me?

 

These kinds of conversations require considerably more tact and diplomacy than I naturally posses.

 

@Bean Sidhe Dividing and conquering the way Farflight suggested seems like a great compromise. Is that something you can do?

  • Like 4

Book Riot Challenge 2021

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29

Link to post

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

New here? Please check out our Privacy Policy and Community Guidelines